ROCH chapter corrections

[JamesG]

Chapter 11 is up.

[rayon]

Chapter 11 Nit-picking

PARAGRAPH 1

Yang Guo [add “had” to denote past perfect tense…presence of “when”] dashed forward…

He wanted to test the young man and see whether he can [change to “could” for consistency of verb tense] keep his promise of guarding him for three days.

His left hand made a semi-circle [added the “-“], his right hand pushed out a palm ; [semi-colon to denote independent clause] it was his life’s proudest work, the stance of “Overcoming the Dragon with Regret” from the “Eighteen Dragon Subduing Palms”. [Noodles forgot to place the ever important booger…oh, I mean dot.]

The first clown couldn’t avoid it ; [semi-colon to denote independent clause] he knew he couldn’t meet this stance head on but all he could [add “do”] was to push his palms out and use his strength to fend off the attack.

PARAGRAPH 2

Hong Qigong was keeping his palm’s power in check ; [semi-colon to denote independent clause] he only used ten percent of his internal energy but the first clown felt his arms go numb and his chest ached [change to “ache” for consistency of tense. The real verb is “felt” so the rest ought to remain in their root form. Notice the “go” in the sentence as an example].

The second clown saw that he was in danger ; [semi-colon to denote independent clause] he was afraid that Hong Qigong’s palms will force him into the deep valley so he quickly stretched out his hand and pushed the first clown’s back.

Hong Qigong’s palm power increased ; [semi-colon…you get the drift by now] the second clown moved back, almost slipping down into the deep valley.

Hong Qigong’s palm's [remove apostrophe] power spread through them, it spread towards the fourth clown who in turn passed it onto the third clown and the third clown spread it towards the final one in the line, the fifth clown.

The clowns had nowhere to hide and nowhere to run ; [semi-colon, etc. etc.] in the blink of an eye, they were defeated by Hong Qigong’s single palm.

PARAGRAPH 3

The five of them steadied [“positioned” is a better word to use] themselves into the mount posture ; [semi-colon] they flared up their chi and united their internal energy to resist the single palm but they felt the force of the palm getting heavier, [change comma to period] Their chests felt tighter and gradually it was becoming more difficult to take a breath [“breathe” is more succinct].

PARAGRAPH 4

Hong Qigong suddenly gave out a ‘yi’ call showing his surprise. [replace comma with period] He took back eighty…

PARAGRAPH 7

The first clown still had his two palms pushing out against him; [semi-colon] he struggled for breath as he said, “We are… are under the tutelage of Master Da’erba.”
Hong Qigong shook his head and said, “Da’erba? I haven’t heard [“have never” reads better] of him….”


PARAGRAPH 10

Hong Qigong shook his head again, and said, “Western Tibet’s Holy Monk, Jinlun Fawang? I’ve never heard of him. Western Tibet has a monk, his name is Reverend Lingzhi, he I have seen, his kung fu is stronger than yours but his skills aren’t advanced. Your kung fu is good, hmm, it makes sense. Go and get your Grand Master here to fight with me.” [SEMI-COLONS!!!!]

PARAGRAPH 13

As he said this, [insert “there came”] a ‘duo’ ‘duo’ ‘duo’ sound ; [semi-colon] a person appeared from around the mountain corner. [replace comma with period] His body was upside down, each hand holding a piece of rock, walking with his palms, it was Western Poison Ouyang Feng.
Yang Guo’s voice cracked as he called out, “Father!”

PARAGRAPH 14

Ouyang Feng did not bother to find out what was happening and leapt behind the five clowns and stretched out his right foot and placed it on their backs ; [semi-colon] a strong energy rushed through the five clowns.

PARAGRAPH 15

Hong Qigong was shocked with the sudden appearance of Ouyang Feng ; [semi-colon] he heard Yang Guo call him ‘Father’ and understood that he was his son; no wonder he was so good.

PARAGRAPH 16

…the more he practiced the stranger his kung fu became, [insert “and”] the stranger it became the more powerful he became.

PARAGRAPH 17

Guo Jing and Huang Rong had recited a small portion of the manual to Hong Qigong ; [semi-colon] it made an impression on his kung fu and great progress in his martial arts.

PARAGRAPH 18

…their body made ‘ka la’ noises ; [semi-colon] it was a hundred times more excruciating than the most severe [insert “of”] punishments.

PARAGRAPH 19

Yang Guo thought, “Even Godfather says their internal energy is very good ; [semi-colon] the five clowns indeed are not run of the mill [change to “run-of-the-mill”] fighters.”

That's it. I'm bored.

April Fool's!

[JamesG]

She's here , she's there, she's everywhere, so beware!
Nit-picking noted.
You remind me of my grade 8 teacher!
Tks

[rayon]

You remind me of my grade 8 teacher!
Tks

I take offense at that. Be advised that I am currently inserting pins on a little JamesG vodoo doll. And yes, the needles are sharp.

[JamesG]

I take offense at that. Be advised that I am currently inserting pins on a little JamesG vodoo doll. And yes, the needles are sharp.

Ooooww! Hope they're not the Jade Bee or Soul Freezing type.
sp. Voodoo

[IcyFox]

Wizard, have you updated the Reading Rooms chapters yet?

No? 20 pushups now!

[Athena]

Guo Jing and Zhen Zhibing knew each other when they were young, when they saw each other both of them were delighted; the two of them entered together.

There should be an extra sentence explaining that now (third edition), that Zhen Zhibing met up with Guo Jing when Zhen Zhibing and his 19 or 20 fellow martial arts brothers followed their teacher Qiu chuji to meet Genghis Khan.

And I believer a few lines are missing, concerning the part where Sun Bu'Er helped Zhao Zhijing up. But I have to get back on that later on.

[JamesG]

Guo Jing and Zhen Zhibing knew each other when they were young, when they saw each other both of them were delighted; the two of them entered together.

There should be an extra sentence explaining that now (third edition), that Zhen Zhibing met up with Guo Jing when Zhen Zhibing and his 19 or 20 fellow martial arts brothers followed their teacher Qiu chuji to meet Genghis Khan.

And I believer a few lines are missing, concerning the part where Sun Bu'Er helped Zhao Zhijing up. But I have to get back on that later on.

Gad! Even when on holidays she still appears.
You're a special kind of lady Athena.

[Bangs]

Chapter 11:

His left hand made a semi circle, his right hand pushed out a palm, it was his life’s proudest work, the stance of “Overcoming the Dragon with Regret” from the “Eighteen Dragon Subduing Palms” The first clown couldn’t avoid it, he knew he couldn’t meet this stance head on but all he could was to push his palms out and use his strength to fend off the attack.

”.
could do

Ouyang Feng flipped upright and stared at Hung Qi Gong and then shouted, “Hey, your kung fu is very good, what’s your name.”

Hong

After hearing this and seeing the confused look on his face, Hong Qigong knew that since he went mad over then years ago, he hadn’t recovered and so said, “I’m called Ouyang Feng, what’s your name?”

ten

The two of them had fought each other many times in the past, and each time both were worried about their own safety and the how strong the other was.

how

Ten’s of years ago, Hong Qigong hated Ouyang Feng to the bone, but now he was old and had mellowed.

Tens

The next morning, Yang Guo saw that they looked like they were on the point of death, they looked worse that yesterday.

than

His was alarmed and flustered; he dug up some more mountain herbs and roasted and fed it to them.

He

The two were forcing him, he had no other response but to go over to Hong Qigong’ side.

Qigong's

By the night of that day, Hong Qigong described the thirty-sixth stance “No Dog’s Under Heaven” sixth change.

Dogs

It was called “No Dog’s Under Heaven” because of this, the ingenuity and mastery of the rod technique had reached the highest echelons of martial arts.

Dogs

Yang Guo was sad, he wanted to ask Hong Qigong to stop the competition, but Ouyang Feng repeated forced him to do as he said, in the end he could only comply.

repeatedly

He thought that since world is a large place, he was alone, he would wander around and when his time comes, he’ll lie on the ground somewhere and die.

the world

When he was ascending the mountain, he was thinking about how everyone looked down him, he was full of hate and anger.

on him

The rude man saw a kid in torn and old garments looking like a beggar blocking the road, he raised his whip and shouted, “Move out of the way now, don’t you want your life?” As he said this he slapped his whip on the horses’ back again.

horse's

Though this horse was fast, its body would be high and then low, jolting about very uncoordinated, it weren’t for the fact that Yang Guo possessed excellent lightness kung fu, he would not have been able to ride it.

if it

Yang Guo thought that this thousand-mile colt has been trapped in the hands the villager, wasting half its life; now that its spirit is free, it wants to gallop and fly over the lands.

of the

Zhao Zhijing chuckled and quietly said, “Apprentice brother Yin; will the one named Long make an appearance here?” Zhen Zhibing’s face became red and didn’t reply.

Zhen

The relationship between a emperor and his subjects, a father and son, a master and disciple were all very significant.

an

Guo Jing was bought up the Jiangnan Seven Freaks and was taught martial arts by Hong Qigong; he was very grateful to his Masters.

brought

Zhao Zhijing saw that he was so bold that he didn’t even more or dodge, he didn’t hold back on his kick and kicked straight across, when the tip of his foot was about three inches away from Yang Guo’s abdomen, he saw in the moonlight Yang Guo’s left thumb slightly sticking out, aiming for his right foot’s ankle ‘Large Opening’ pressure point.

move

She then say goodbye to Guo Jing and Huang Rong.

said

Yang Guo calmly, “Fine!” He followed the servant out of the study and heard Guo Fu flare up at the Wu brothers, “I want to speak with him; can you two stop me? His kung fu is not good, I’ll ask father to teach him.”

calmly replied

Chapter 11 done.....

[JamesG]

Well done Bangs! You're catching up to me.
My excuse is that I'm tied up watching the series.
I'll watch the last DVD tomorrow....then it's back to work.

Chapter 12 is up.

[HuangYushi]

Ten’s of years ago, Hong Qigong hated Ouyang Feng to the bone, but now he was old and had mellowed.

Tens

"Decades..." is the way to describe "tens of years".

[atlantean0208]

"Decades..." is the way to describe "tens of years".

Mr HYS, I'm eagerly anticipating for your sig change soon, can't wait!!!!

[WesY2K]

Thanks for doing all this correcting and editing! I hope the Reading Rooms and/or Wuxiepedia will be updated soon.

[test0012]

"Hou Shi Wo" in chapter 36 (and maybe other chapters) should be "He Shiwo".

[Bangs]

"Decades..." is the way to describe "tens of years".

Yes of course but I always consider what the translator worked on, and so my editing is limited to obvious faults only.

I leave the translation errors to you guys.

[Athena]

Sun Bu'Er saw that her martial nephew was being embarrassed, she stretched out her left arm and pulled him up with her hand and then pushed his back a few times, unsealing his pressure points. Though she had been practicing Taoism for many years, she was still very stubborn and strong. She saw that his kung fu was extremely crafty, it looked like that it was their sect’s Black Star; if she fought herself she might not be able to win, so she called out, “Let’s go!” She then say goodbye to Guo Jing and Huang Rong. Her sleeve swept out and she leapt out of the study through the window, and then jumped up onto the roof.

A sentence was left out. Sun Bu'Er saw that her martial nephew was being embarrassed, she stretched out her left arm and pulled him up with her hand and then pushed his back a few times, unsealing his pressure points. Yang Guo quickly backed away now. He saw that she unsealed Zhao Zhijing's pressure points with ease and knew that her martial arts were far superior compared to Zhao Zhijing, therefore Yang Guo was afraid of her and kept a distance between himself and Sun Bu'Er.
Though Sun Bu'Er had been practicing Taoism for many years, she was still very stubborn and strong. She saw that his kung fu was extremely crafty, it looked like that it was their sect’s Black Star; if she fought herself she might not be able to win, so she called out, “Let’s go!” She then say goodbye to Guo Jing and Huang Rong. Her sleeve swept out and she leapt out of the study through the window, and then jumped up onto the roof.

[Athena]

Sorry, that sentence I posted earlier only exists in the third edition. So, the translator did not make a mistake. It's up to you whether you want to keep that sentence in.
Jin Yong probably put in that sentence to portray that knowing the Jade Maiden Art does not necessarily mean being superior to Quanzhen experts who have decades of Quanzhen martial arts training. Jin Yong clipped the wings of the Jade Maiden Art a bit in edition 3 of ROCH.
Because in the new edition, Wang Chongyang's words on the Jade Maiden Art were:The art of Jade Maiden WANTS TO OVERCOME Quanzhen. But Chongyang, in his life, has lost to no one.

In the past it was:The Art of Jade Maiden is superior to Quanzhen. But Chongyang, in his life, has lost to no one.

[Bangs]

Chapter 12:

Yang Guo laughed and said, “I’m ugly, my horse is ugly, we’re a match. The horses that the Wu brothers ride must very spirited horses.”

must be

The Wu brothers always followed Guo Fu’s orders, they were about to jump down when they heard footsteps below; the Guo couple were walking over.”

*what's this for?

Yang Guo now knew that Guo Jing was his father’s godson, the words ‘Uncle Guo’ had real a real meaning behind it, when he heard Guo Jing treating him with love in his words he was touched, tears almost rolled from of his eyes.

really a *or* a real

Lu Youjiao display all thirty-six strokes of the technique, but Lu Youjiao had yet to understand the formulae.

displayed

According the rules of the clan, when he takes over the position he must have learned the “Dog Beating Stick Technique”; this is why that she spoke almost non-stop for around two hours.

to the

She laughed and said, “Mother, I bought these three along to take a look at the world famous “Dog Beating Stick Technique”, but who knew that when Elder Lu uses it, the skill doesn’t look good at all. Mother, perform the skill for us.”

brought

Guo Fu concentrated on her lower body, as soon as the bamboo stick comes towards her, she will immediately jump and avid the trip.

avoid

Guo Fu got up and called out, “I’m not taking about that and I’m not taking that. It was my fault.”

*what was she saying?

Guo Fu stretched out her arm and hooked it around the Wu brothers arms combining the strength of the three, as solid as Mount Tai.

brothers’ arms

Guo Fu called out, “Mother, that’s just trickery; I’m not taking about that.”

*Again, what does GF mean?

All the beggar clan members responded; they all called out, “We swear to follow Chief Hong Lao’s orders.

*missing ”

He felt that his mading fools out of the Beggar Clan members before was wrong.

making

They heard him continue, “But Chief Hong Lao goes and comes as he pleases; over the last then years he has only shown himself once. But when we discuss the important matter of defending against the enemy, but have no way to call on him, what should we do then?”

ten

Huang Rong knew that today matters would not be settled unless martial artswere used.

*no space

Guo Jing knew that his wife’s “Dog Beating Stick Technique” is ingenious; it would be able to beat Huo Dou. But in the past few months, her baby’s chi had moved, her body was not in tune, she cannot fight with someone else; so he got out of his seat and stood between the tables and said, “Chief Hong Lao’s has never used his “Dog Beating Stick Technique”, come and experience his “Eighteen Dragon Subduing Palms”.”

Lao

He saw that Huang Rong’s wasn’t well, whether he wins or loses, he couldn’t let her take the risk.

Rong

Gu Jing was delighted and was just about to ask her when suddenly wind sounds created by weapons could be heard, everyone turned their heads and saw the Wu brothers using their long swords fighting with Huo Dou and his fan.

Guo

The “Eighteen Dragon Subduing Palms” and “Solitary Yang Finger” are first class skills in the world of martial arts, though the Wu brother’s internal energy was weak, the stances they put out were perfect.

brothers’
were

(Huang Rong laughed and said, “Very spirited ‘Zi Yan Tie’!”

Zhu Ziliu gave a laugh and thought, “I have always thought that I am clever, but I am still a level below that girl. I have studied this skill diligently for over ten years; just one look and she saw through it.”
The work that he was using now was Zhang Xu’s ‘Tie Yin Tie’ of the Tang dynasty. Zhang Xu has been given the title of ‘Cao Sheng’, the saint of cursive calligraphy. Du Fu’s poem ‘The Song of the eight drinking Immortals’ says; “Zhang Xu’s three cups passes onto Cao Sheng, the hat is removed showing his head in front of the king, the pen descending on the paper like a fog.”)

*Why did HR say Zi Yan Tie then later its Tie Yin Tie, I'd like an explanation please. Hehe.



Chapter 12 done.....

[JamesG]

Bangs, check your PM
Chapter 13 is up.
That uses up my stock-pile so I've got to get back at it. At least the stock-pile gave me time to watch the series.

While working just now on chapter 12 I found one we both missed:

Yang Guo now knew that Guo Jing was his father’s godson, the words ‘Uncle Guo’ had a real meaning behind it, when he heard Guo Jing treating him with love in his words he was touched, tears almost rolled from of his eyes.

It should be grandfather's

[fox-s]

While working just now on chapter 12 I found one we both missed:

Yang Guo now knew that Guo Jing was his father’s godson, the words ‘Uncle Guo’ had a real meaning behind it, when he heard Guo Jing treating him with love in his words he was touched, tears almost rolled from of his eyes.

It should be grandfather's

I think more accurately: his father's sworn brother. But let me get back to the original and check that out.

Edited:
Yes, I was right. This is from the original Chinese:

It was only that moment that Yang Guo knew that Guo Jing turned out to be his own biological father's 'jin lan xiong di' [lit. gold and orchid brother - meaning sworn brother].