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Thread: Funny Analysis

  1. #1
    Senior Member kidd's Avatar
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    Default Funny Analysis

    I read this a long time ago in a JY translation site. Suddenly thought of it today. So, I post it here for u guys to read for a laugh.

    Shi Po Tian vs Sweeper Monk

    Let's do a comparison:
    Who is smarter?
    Sek Poh Tin is not stupid, but the Sweeper Monk is really sharp.
    Sek Poh Tin: 0 Sweeper Monk: 1

    Who is more saintly?
    Sek Poh Tin, obviously.
    Sek Poh Tin: 1 Sweeper Monk: 1

    Who has better luck with women?
    Sek Poh Tin has a bit of luck. The Sweeper Monk is, well, a monk.
    Sek Poh Tin: 2 Sweeper Monk: 1

    Who has nuttier martial arts?
    The Sweeper Monk is just really strong, but Sek Poh Tin's skills are just bizarre.
    Sek Poh Tin: 3 Sweeper Monk: 1

    Who is more weird?
    The Sweeper Monk observed the two nasties in the Shaolin temple and didn't say anything.
    Sek Poh Tin: 3 Sweeper Monk: 2

    Who is the better cook?
    Sek Poh Tin wins this one.
    Sek Poh Tin: 4 Sweeper Monk: 2

    Who is better at cleaning up?
    Tie. The Sweeper Monk is the world's best janitor, but Sek Poh Tin does laundry as well.
    Sek Poh Tin: 4 Sweeper Monk: 2

    The Sweeper Monk gets a 10 point bonus for being bald. For having the better name, Gow Dzap Jhung gets a bonus of 5000 points.

    Thus, in my highly scientific analysis, Sek Poh Tin wins by a score of 5004-12 (with a standard deviation of +/- 2 points).

    Posted by: David Yan
    Date: Thursday, 31 May 2001, at 11:02 p.m.

    Wei Xiao Bao vs Sweeper Monk+Shi Po Tian

    Wai Siu Boe should be the most powerful fighter of all. He could talk himself out of trouble and he has the one invincible martial arts style that no other fighter can match. LUCK!!! He has defeated all his opponents with luck.

    let's do another comparison.

    both sweeper monk and sek por tin can defeat their opponents with kung fu, but wsb doesn't need it. he'll just make you turn around and then he'll stab you.
    wsb 1pt the other 2 0pt

    sweeper monk is a monk and has no woman while sek por tin only has one woman. wsb, with 7 wives and mabye more after the story ended.
    wsb 7pts and the other 2 0pts.

    i forgot, but how many opponents have both sweeper monk and sek por tin defeated. oh well
    wsb 200pts and the other 2 200pts for defeating 200 opponents each. well, it's probably a lot more or a lot less, but no time to count.

    who's smarter?
    jm 5 pts, sek por tin 2 pts, and wsb 10000 pts.

    who's got more money?
    wsb $2 million something (around there) during the ching dynasty. jm $0 cause he's a monk. sek por tin $10 maybe during the ming dynasty.
    wsb 2million pts. jm and sek por tin 10pts, but $10 in the ming dynasty is like $100 in the ching dynasty.

    so the pts are. wsb 2million pts. sek por tin and sm 100pts.

    so the total is ws 1 billion some odd pts (give or take from other stuff that i didn't mention), while sek por tin and jm combine are less than a 1000 pts.

    therefore, wsb is invincible!!!

    Posted by: dgkd
    Date: Friday, 1 June 2001, at 3:04 p.m.

    Source: http://www.geocities.com/jinyongnovelsonline/faq2.html
    什麼是朋友?朋友永遠是在你犯下不可原諒錯誤的時候,仍舊站在你那邊的笨蛋。~ 王亞瑟

    和諧唔係一百個人講同一番話,係一百個人有一百句唔同嘅說話,而又互相尊重 ~ - 葉梓恩

  2. #2
    Senior Member Candide's Avatar
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    Am I supposed to laugh at the total lack of humour or the fact that it's hosted on geocities? Not sure what's funnier.
    "Anything you can't say NO to is your MASTER, and you are its SLAVE."

    "I disapprove of what I say, but I will defend to the death my right to say it."

  3. #3
    Senior Member kidd's Avatar
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    You can choose whichever reason you want to laugh at or u can just sulk or continue to write sarcastic remarks here while rolling your eyes. It's all up to u.
    什麼是朋友?朋友永遠是在你犯下不可原諒錯誤的時候,仍舊站在你那邊的笨蛋。~ 王亞瑟

    和諧唔係一百個人講同一番話,係一百個人有一百句唔同嘅說話,而又互相尊重 ~ - 葉梓恩

  4. #4
    Senior Member danshu_'s Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Candide
    Am I supposed to laugh at the total lack of humour or the fact that it's hosted on geocities? Not sure what's funnier.
    Are we supposed to laugh at your total lack of humour here?

    What the hell is your problem?
    havent come up with a good one yet..

  5. #5
    TommyH
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    Is danshu_ mad?! It was funny! Hahahahahahahahahahahahahaha...

  6. #6
    Senior Member yittz's Avatar
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    WXB vs Xu Zhu

    Having less hair than WXB (who's only half bald)
    XZ- 1pt, WXB - 0pt

    Having a one night stand with a mystery women that he felt and heard, but have not seen (think that deserves 100pt no?)
    XZ - 101pt, WXB - 0pt

    Given internal energy of three tanks without asking for it (+10 each)
    XZ - 131pt, WXB - 0pt

    Intelligence: Able to solve a 'go' maze that no one in DGSD could solve (+50)
    XZ - 181pt, WXB - 0pt

    Cunningness: Able to mask his cunningness not only from other characters, but from readers; in his pursuit to become an ultimate martial artist, in law of the XiXia kingdom, and friendship with powerful people, leader of a powerful martial arts group +72caves, 36islands (+50)
    XZ - 231pt, WXB - 0pt

    Having a Shaolin abbot as father (how many people in history can say that? not talking about pope's children of course) (+20)
    XZ - 251pt, WXB - 0pt

    So you don't complain about me being biase: having lived in the Qing dynasty (+1)
    XZ - 251pt, WXB - 1pt

    My microanalysis states that XZ wins by a narrow margin of 250pts. If you got a problem with it, please pm me.
    Last edited by yittz; 05-06-06 at 11:49 PM.

  7. #7
    Senior Member Candide's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by danshu_
    Are we supposed to laugh at your total lack of humour here?

    What the hell is your problem?
    Sorry mum. Didn't know that we have to praise everything on this forum.

    Quote Originally Posted by yittz
    My microanalysis states that XZ wins by a narrow margin of 250pts. If you got a problem with it, please pm me.
    Actually that was something worth reading. I'll PM you a complaint anyway as requested.
    Last edited by Candide; 05-06-06 at 11:23 PM.
    "Anything you can't say NO to is your MASTER, and you are its SLAVE."

    "I disapprove of what I say, but I will defend to the death my right to say it."

  8. #8
    Banned strife_au's Avatar
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    haha funny stuff very insightful

  9. #9
    Senior Member yittz's Avatar
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    Regarding the geocity website: there is an article written by Kwok regarding changes in TLBB from 1st edition to 2nd - http://www.geocities.com/jyheroes/article12.html

  10. #10
    Senior Member The_One's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Candide
    Sorry mum. Didn't know that we have to praise everything on this forum.
    No you don't. But it doesn't mean you should bring it down either.

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