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Mobile Suit Gundam - The Second Century (Part 1: Prelude 0099) - Page 5
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  1. #81
    Moderator Ken Cheng's Avatar
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    All right, thanks to the St. Andrews University's Face Transformer online tool found by some of our friends over at the Academia Forum earlier this week, I've been able to change photos of American actress Tea Leoni and Hong Kong actress (ATV) Joey Meng Yee Man into reasonably accurate representations of how I imagine Athena Ibaz and Jolie Minh to look.

    Here are the results of the past few days' work:

    Athena Ibaz (Minerva Zabi)


    Captain Athena Ibaz, Centurion Team Leader, known to a select few as Duchess Minerva Zabi of the Archduchy of Zeon


    Athena typically dyes her hair a blondish color...


    ...but her actual natural hair color is closer to red.

    Jolie Minh


    sixteen-year old Jolie Minh - most gifted mobile suit pilot of her generation



    Jolie is passionate, fearless, and fiercely loyal


    Despite her extraordinary gifts as a warrior, Jolie is still very naive, as sixteen-year olds tend to be.


    more pictures later...

  2. #82
    Moderator Ken Cheng's Avatar
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    Some more pics....


    Despite being an exquisitely beautiful young woman, Athena finds that her other assets - such as her extraordinary intelligence (Athena's IQ is 200) and her no-nonsense military professionalism - tend to intimidate potential male suitors. Not that this matters much to Athena, as her plans leave little consideration for the possibility of a romantic relationship.


    Jolie, by comparison, is much more of a romantic at heart than her friend and commanding officer. Whereas Athena is guided by her intellect, Jolie is guided more by her passion. They are two contrasting personalities: one ice, the other fire.

  3. #83
    Moderator Ken Cheng's Avatar
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    Athena is a genius of strategy and tactics. She has read and absorbed a library's worth of literature on such subjects, and during her days as a cadet in the Federal Forces' Officers Academy, Athena wrote a half dozen books on these topics that have since become required reading for Federal Forces officers (including senior officers). Conversely, Athena is also a well-versed diplomat with keen political instincts and a strong sense of history. In what little free time Athena has, she is a patron of the fine arts. She is very well read and knowledgeable in subjects such as the fine arts, classic literature, and classical music (Athena is herself a musician - a violinist since childhood). She is also an accomplished ballroom dancer (particularly Viennese waltz). Possessing excellent fashion sense, Athena is an impeccably elegant dresser, although she seldom has the opportunity to wear anything other than her Earth Federation Forces officer's uniform (Athena typically wears this with the officer's hat and a command overcoat to stylish effect). Additionally, she is fluent and literate in fifteen different languages from six continents. She also holds the equivalent of Master's degrees in mathematics, mechanical engineering, astrophysics, history, international politics, and international law. Moreover, Athena is a well-trained fighter and an excellent markswoman. Although she lacks Jolie's phenomenal fighting talent, Athena is a capable fighter in her own right that can hold her own against anyone.


    Despite having only minimal formal martial arts training, Jolie is a singular talent in the fighting arts - able to instinctively use her tiny, but athletic body to win any fight against any opponent. There is probably not a single human being alive who can best Jolie in personal combat. She is a one-woman wrecking crew who can singlehandedly take down a group of strong, dangerous, well-armed and well-trained men. This physical talent also transfers itself to Jolie's ability to operate mecha. She can operate any mecha or vehicle with almost superhuman skill. Athena has identified Jolie's vast Newtype potential, although Jolie has yet to fully tap this potential. For all her physical gifts, however, Jolie is no deep thinker. Although far from being unintelligent, Jolie has little patience for or understanding of things such as fine arts, literature, or classical music. Jolie is, however, very street-smart...a natural result of the five years she spent surviving in the Industria Colony. Her instincts for detecting untrustworthy people are very sharp. Ultimately, Jolie is too outspoken, argumentative, and opinionated to be a diplomat like her friend Athena. Jolie's idea of a good time is dancing the night away at a disco or playing sports (Jolie is an excellent athlete). Jolie's fashion sense is reflective of her youthfulness - much less immaculate than Athena's, and far more willing to be overtly sexy. A bundle of teenaged hormonal energy (with a well-developed libido to show for it), Jolie's greatest difficulties are SITTING STILL and BEING QUIET (much to Athena's exasperation).

    ************************************************** *************

    Despite their obvious differences, Athena and Jolie find much in common. Both are heavy drinkers and smokers, and spend all too much of their paychecks and free time damaging their livers and lungs. Athena and Jolie can often be found in the Officer's Club after hours drinking unfathomable amounts of bourbon, scotch, and whiskey and smoking cigarettes by the dozen together. Oddly enough, the pair is always alert, sober, and attentive on duty mere hours later. It is a mystery even to the Federal Forces' medical experts.

    Those who know Athena and Jolie well often joke that the two friends live on a steady diet of hard liquor, tobacco smoke, strong black coffee (non-decaf), and the sheer thrill of mobile suit combat. The two young officers live with abandon, as neither one of them believes that she will live to see the age of thirty. Each of them has accepted fiery death in a mobile suit cockpit as her most likely final fate.

  4. #84
    Senior Member ghostdarTeal'c's Avatar
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    i read ch1 up to page#4 (i told myself "only one post" but sadly enough, your first post of ch1 is pretty short).......im rather unconvinced that 10y-old Minerva is actually giving orders to her commanders and generals.....she's that genius, huh? i mean, there shouldve been an advisor to oversee those kind of things, rite? all right, i'll just settle that she's a genius

    btw, your description of the camera panning here and there is actually rather distracting.....but i guess i'll have to get used to it, huh....btw, good work so far, Ken! im continuing the rest of the chapter tomorrow....

  5. #85
    Moderator Ken Cheng's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by ghostdarTeal'c View Post
    i read ch1 up to page#4 (i told myself "only one post" but sadly enough, your first post of ch1 is pretty short).......im rather unconvinced that 10y-old Minerva is actually giving orders to her commanders and generals.....she's that genius, huh? i mean, there shouldve been an advisor to oversee those kind of things, rite? all right, i'll just settle that she's a genius
    Minerva's eldest uncle, Giren Zabi, had an I.Q. of 200, and so does Minerva...I suppose she inherited that trait from her uncle. ALL of the Zabis were quite smart (although Giren and Minerva would be the two smartest), and although Minerva was only ten, she *was* the Duchess (last survivor of the Zabi Royal Family).

    In the MOBILE SUIT GUNDAM ZZ TV anime series (1986-1987) that featured Minerva as a supporting character, she had an advisor/regent named Haman Khan, who was the main villain of that series. Haman was an ambitious, cruel woman who used Minerva as a figurehead to rule the Neo Zeon Archduchy. Fortunately, Haman was killed in the final episode of GUNDAM ZZ, leaving Minerva the only legitimate leader of Neo Zeon.




    Regent Haman Khan, de facto ruler of the Neo Zeon Archduchy during U.C. 0085-0088. Killed in combat against the AEUG in U.C. 0088.

    During the intervening years after Minerva's disappearance and her reemergence as Athena Ibaz, Minerva was raised and tutored by Colonel Char Aznable, the "Red Comet of Zeon." A brilliant man, Char taught Minerva everything he knew before he perished a few years later in U.C. 0093 at the end of the MOBILE SUIT GUNDAM: CHAR'S COUNTER ATTACK movie (1988). It was likely Char that inspired Minerva to create the false identity of Athena Ibaz (just as "Char Aznable" and "Quattro Bageena" were false identities for Cassoval Rem Daikun).

    Quote Originally Posted by ghostdarTeal'c View Post
    btw, your description of the camera panning here and there is actually rather distracting.....but i guess i'll have to get used to it, huh....btw, good work so far, Ken! im continuing the rest of the chapter tomorrow....
    Thanks. I really appreciate the feedback and look forward to more.

    Originally, I wrote this as a screenplay, so there were "stage instructions" littered all over it. Now that I'm posting it up more as an online novel, however, I'm removing those stage references and using a prose style more suitable for novel-writing. The only holdover is the use of the term "Episodes" instead of "Chapters," as I do envision each chapter as the equivalent of a 40-minute television or OAV episode.

  6. #86
    Moderator Ken Cheng's Avatar
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    Here's a heads-up for readers of MOBILE SUIT GUNDAM: THE SECOND CENTURY (PRELUDE U.C. 0099). Yes, I mean you, ghost (and everybody else reading as well).

    In upcoming chapters, there will be some...uh, shall we say, more mature content. I've already gotten clearances from Suet Seung (moderator of this forum), and it's been given what I would assume would be an NC-17 rating. Heh.

    Anyway, don't worry that the story is going to turn into some kind of depraved fantasy. Just letting you know ahead of time that there will be certain story elements introduced that are meant to create the mature (and I mean that in the broadest sense of the word) overtones of this story.

  7. #87
    Moderator Ken Cheng's Avatar
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    In case y'all haven't noticed, I'm gradually adding Wikipedia hyperlinks to the various GUNDAM-related terminology in the story so that readers aren't left completely perplexed by the numerous GUNDAM-universe allusions. Hopefully, that'll help some.

    And I promise: more new chapters later this week. I know it's been slow during the past week.

  8. #88
    Senior Member ghostdarTeal'c's Avatar
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    you can go as slow as you please, ken... im doing snail reading......

    you know, it bugs me how readers wont comment on the fanfics they read...i mean how do we know where we are unless they at least post a few words of what they think bout the fic?

    im embarassed to say that i used to be one of those silent readers, but after i get to know how the author's side feels like, im posting at least once in the fanfic that i read

  9. #89
    Moderator Ken Cheng's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by ghostdarTeal'c View Post
    you can go as slow as you please, ken... im doing snail reading......

    you know, it bugs me how readers wont comment on the fanfics they read...i mean how do we know where we are unless they at least post a few words of what they think bout the fic?

    im embarassed to say that i used to be one of those silent readers, but after i get to know how the author's side feels like, im posting at least once in the fanfic that i read
    You know, it's really hard to get a measure of which fanfics at the forums are hits and which are the duds. You can't really measure by number of views: many people might click out of curiosity, but not really read. Some stories get a high number of views, but few comments. Some of the fanfics have gotten numerous remarks. These, I gather, would be the hits.

  10. #90
    Senior Member ghostdarTeal'c's Avatar
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    yeah....but you gotta know there are also silent readers....the kind of readers that i used to be. i read, but i couldnt be bothered to comment....my opinion? number of comments doesnt really tell you the actual number of readers....ive got a fanfic in some other site, this site gives you hits for each chapter. my fanfic got less then 10 comments overall, but the hits of each chapter is more than 30. so even if a reader would just click out of curiosity, he/she shoulnt be doing it for each of the other chapters, right? so i count out the hits of the first chapter and only consider the hits of the consecutive chapters to get the rough idea of how many actually reads my fanfic however, gotta say that it would be more fulfilling to read what the readers think about the material that theyre reading, and not only the number og hits that it bears....

  11. #91
    Moderator Ken Cheng's Avatar
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    Of course, the views on my fanfic are probably inflated because I'm promoting the hell out of it. If nothing else, my fanfic has definitely got the most aggressive promotion campaign on the forum!

  12. #92
    Senior Member ghostdarTeal'c's Avatar
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    finished ch2. got quite a few questions here, sprouting out of confusion with all the interlaced GUNDAM terms and strange names (one of the reason why i hated fantasy novels is cuz i couldnt focus on the storyline with the strange-sounding names popping here and there). and please, i beg you, limit the answers to very short and simple comprehendable english language. Am not quite interested to read another lengthy explanation of the GUNDAM anime as such

    1. Are the Zabi Monarch cruel people? i think i read somewhere of them being opressive, i cant say which paragraph, but that's the impression that i got so far.

    2. Is the Earth Federation actually colonizing the other planets?

    3. What the freaking hell is Zeon? A planet? A government? A city? That name keep popping and after reading the same paragraph twice (obviously rereading doesnt work...i get dizzy just by trying to remember the Earth federation and ISRLA), i just gave up in looking into it.

    4. Mobile suit is something that you can climb into, but not hydrosuit? hydrosuit is a something like a robot?

    5. Okay, humanoid is human-like, spacenoid should be aliens, right? So these spacenoids, i take it that they all have one head, two hands and two legs like us?

    i think that's all so far...
    Da One and Only,
    ghostdarTeal'c

    ~~~~~~~~~~~~~

    Idols: Mark Dacascos and Vicki Zhao Wei
    Fav Artists: Zhang Tie Lin, Cheng E Kin, Vin Diesel, Jet Li, Amy Chan Sau Man, Michelle Rodriguez, Theresa Lee Yee Hong
    Fav Series: The Great General, Heroine of The Yangs, Huan Zhu Ge Ge I & II, Secret Battle of The Majesties
    Fav Movies: The Matrix I, G.I Jane, Fist of Legend, Drive, Gladiator, 2009 Lost Memories, So Close, Crying Freeman

    ~~~~~~~~~~~~~

    My name is Maximus Decimus Meridius; Commander of the Army of the North, General of the Felix Legions, loyal servant to the true emperor; Marcus Aurilius. Father to a murdered son, husband to a murdered wife, and I will have my vengeance, in this life or the next.

    - The Spaniard -

  13. #93
    Moderator Ken Cheng's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by ghostdarTeal'c View Post
    finished ch2. got quite a few questions here, sprouting out of confusion with all the interlaced GUNDAM terms and strange names (one of the reason why i hated fantasy novels is cuz i couldnt focus on the storyline with the strange-sounding names popping here and there). and please, i beg you, limit the answers to very short and simple comprehendable english language. Am not quite interested to read another lengthy explanation of the GUNDAM anime as such
    Hiya, Ghost. Glad to be of service. Let's get to your questions.

    Quote Originally Posted by ghostdarTeal'c View Post
    1. Are the Zabi Monarch cruel people? i think i read somewhere of them being opressive, i cant say which paragraph, but that's the impression that i got so far.
    For the most part, yes. Somebody once described the Zabis as the most venomous family since the di Medici's of Renaissance Italy. Here's a brief rundown on the Zabis:

    Archduke Degin Zabi: Was formerly the Vice Prime Minister of the Zeon Republic serving under Prime Minister Zeon Daikun, the enlightened founder of the democratic and peaceful Zeon Republic (the first independent space nation). Degin murdered Zeon Daikun, became the new leader of the Zeon Republic, and changed it into a monarchy - the Archduchy of Zeon. Over the next ten years, Degin and his eldest son Giren oversaw a massive militarization of the Zeon state, developing space warships and mobile suits for war. After ten years of military buildup, the Archduchy of Zeon started a war against the Earth Federation Government.

    Crown Prince Giren Zabi: Giren had an IQ of 200 and was a worshipper of Adolph Hitler. He patterned himself and his policies after Hitler...telling the Zeon people that they were the "chosen people," and that it was their divine right to rule humanity. To facilitate this, the people of Zeon would need to eradicate those on Earth (the "Oldtypes") and even the space colonists who remained loyal to the Earth Federation. So ambitious was Giren that he even conspired to murder his own father, Degin Zabi, so that he could claim the Zeon throne for himself.

    Princess Kycilia Zabi: Just as devious and cruel as Giren, but more subtle and sneaky. Kycilia liked to operate in the shadows...pretending to be loyal to her father and brothers, but secretly marshalling resources (including Char Aznable) to stab them in the back when the opportunity presented itself.

    Prince Dozle Zabi: Minerva's (Athena) father. Although Dozle was a large, physically powerful and scary man, he was relatively ethical compared to his father and older siblings. Dozle was a very loyal and patriotic man, but also a very brutal and aggressive soldier. He was very good to his troops, and thus, his soldiers were especially loyal to him. Dozle was the only Zabi to have offspring prior to his death during the One Year War. That offspring was Minerva Zabi (Athena Ibaz), one of our main characters.

    Prince Garma Zabi: The youngest of the Zeon princes, and the most handsome. Like Dozle, Garma was basically a decent man (at least compared to Degin, Giren, and Kycilia). Because he was so young, Garma constantly worked towards impressing his older siblings and father (Degin loved Garma most among his four children). Garma was a very ambitious young man, but he lacked the cruelty of the other Zabis. He was betrayed by Char Aznable and killed in combat against the Federation. His brother Giren used Garma's death as propaganda to expand the war against the Federation.

    Duchess Minerva Zabi: Our own Athena Ibaz. Because of her family history, Minerva is wracked with guilt. Her family, particularly her eldest uncle and grandfather, caused the death of billions. As a result, Minerva has dedicated herself to preventing such catastrophes from ever happening again. She's fighting a hopeless, desperate battle to redeem her family. Guilt seems to drive everything Minerva does; she's a victim of guilt.

    Although Minerva is far more compassionate and ethical than her elders were, she has inherited at least some measure of their ruthlessness. Minerva is perfectly capable of being ruthless to her enemies. Fortunately, her enemies are not innocent people, but those who would prey upon innocents. Minerva is a good person who will use ruthless methods to defeat evil people, if necessary. Like all the Zabis, Minerva understands the need for power and is keen on acquiring it.

    Quote Originally Posted by ghostdarTeal'c View Post
    2. Is the Earth Federation actually colonizing the other planets?
    Only so far as Earth's Solar System. The GUNDAM saga mostly takes place within the Earth Sphere...that is, Earth, the moon, and the seven space colonies within lunar orbit. Occassionally, we hear about outlying colonies as far as Mars and Jupiter, but most of the action takes place in the space between Earth and lunar orbit.

    The Earth Federation rules the planet Earth and space colonies Side 1, Side 2, Side 5, and Side 7. It also has limited jurisdiction of the lunar cities of Von Braun and Anman, although anything near the moon is more sympathetic towards Zeon. Side 6 is an independent space colony that remains neutral in the Earth/Zeon war.

    Quote Originally Posted by ghostdarTeal'c View Post
    3. What the freaking hell is Zeon? A planet? A government? A city? That name keep popping and after reading the same paragraph twice (obviously rereading doesnt work...i get dizzy just by trying to remember the Earth federation and ISRLA), i just gave up in looking into it.
    Zeon is the space colony Side 3, which declared its independence from the Earth Federation some thirty years before my story. It is named after its founder, Zeon Daikun, who promoted an ideology of peaceful coexistence with Earth. Unfortunately, Zeon Daikun was murdered by his own follower, Degin Zabi, who used the Zeon name to start an empire, the Archduchy of Zeon. In the story, Zeon mostly refers to the people, culture, and government of Side 3.

    Quote Originally Posted by ghostdarTeal'c View Post
    4. Mobile suit is something that you can climb into, but not hydrosuit? hydrosuit is a something like a robot?
    A mobile suit is a huge, robot-like war machine...such as the Gundam. They were built primarily for war, although they also have their industrial applications.

    A hydrosuit is a smaller powered suit similar to a mobile suit. Hydrosuits actually preceded mobile suits, and were developed for industrial use in the space colonies. Although some guerilla groups such as the AEUG and ISRLA have used hydrosuits for combat purposes, these are primarily industrial work machines. Hydrosuits are much smaller than mobile suits (the average combat MS is about 18 meters tall; HS are generally 5 meters tall) and are not necessarily humanoid-shaped like most mobile suits are.

    Quote Originally Posted by ghostdarTeal'c View Post
    5. Okay, humanoid is human-like, spacenoid should be aliens, right? So these spacenoids, i take it that they all have one head, two hands and two legs like us?
    In the GUNDAM world, there are no aliens from deep space. All characters are human beings whose ancestors were born on Earth. However, people have been immigrating into outer space to live in space colonies for over 100 years. Over half the human population now lives in space. Hence, the people have space have developed their own culture and their own way of thinking, and don't necessarily feel culturally or politically tied to the Earth anymore (in fact, many of them resent being ruled from Earth). Their culture is known as "Spacenoid" culture. A Spacenoid is basically a citizen of outer space...a human born in space or who immigrated there from Earth.

    Quote Originally Posted by ghostdarTeal'c View Post
    i think that's all so far...
    Feel free to hit me with more, and thanks for reading.

  14. #94
    Moderator Ken Cheng's Avatar
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    Episode 6 continued

    0330 the following morning at the Centurion Team's barracks. Captain Athena Ibaz enters 2Lt. Jolie Minh's private quarters.

    Jolie is fast asleep. Athena turns on the room's overhead lighting, filling the small space with white illumination.

    Jolie buries herself in the covers, wrapping her blankets around her as if she were a mummy...or a human burrito.

    "You got something against sleep?" Jolie's muffled voice comes irritably from under the covers.

    "You'll be sleeping for a long, long time if you don't get up now," Athena replies, "I've gotten the data on the Blackbirds' Gellond mobile suits."

    That arouses Jolie. The pretty teenaged mobile suit pilot pokes her head out of the covers, long, luscious hair all askew, "Data on the Gellonds? Really? How did...?"

    "Never mind that," Athena says, "get dressed and report down to the conference room."

    Fifteen minutes later, the Centurion Team is gathered in its conference room. They are all somewhat bleary-eyed from having been roused from their sleep, but Athena figures that cutting short their sleep by thirty minutes is definitely worthwhile if it means keeping them all alive.

    Athena has a graphic of the Zeon mobile suit Gellond on the holographic display, "The Gellond is the latest upgrade of the Gelgoog series mobile suit. Its engine output is thirty percent greater than that of a Geara Doga, and its speed and maneuverability are more or less equivalent to those of our own Jegans. The three units that have been assigned to the Blackbirds are probably upgrades on the standard model, with improved avionics and combat data processors."

    The Centurion Team members take notes...except for Jolie, who appears a bit spaced out.

    Athena notes that with mild irritation, but continues, "What you'll need to watch out for is the Gellond's multi-target tracking beam rifle system. This new weapon enables the Gellond to hit five separate targets in sequence with a single shot from its beam rifle. It accomplishes this with a new kind of motion tracking device that our scientists and engineers haven't been able to completely figure out yet."

    The Centurion Team members mumble nervously among themselves about the enemy's fearsome new weapon. They are apprehensive about going up against this new technology against which they have no counter or protection.

    Jolie yawns softly, but audibly.

    Athena says, "Lieutenant Minh, do you have a question or comment?"

    Jolie stretches before answering wearily, "No, ma'am. Just need to watch out for this multi-tracking thingamajig..."

    Resisting the urge to roll her eyes and shake her head, Athena goes on, "Lieutenant Minh and I will take the point on counterattack if we encounter the Blackbirds during the operation. The priority for the rest of you will be to support the other Special Forces units in protecting the Silverthread and the Nightwing. Generals Noah and Blackhead must arrive on Earth safely, is that understood?"

    The Centurion Team salutes as one, "Yes, ma'am!"

    "All right then," Athena says, "you're dismissed to breakfast in the commissary. We'll reassemble at Garrison Noah at 0600. We'll be spending the day making final inspections on our mobile suits and reviewing procedures for atmospheric combat."

    As the Centurion Team begins to depart, Athena turns to Jolie, "Lieutenant Minh, I'd like you to stay behind for a moment."

    Looks like my English muffin and orange juice will have to wait until after the lecture, Jolie sighs.

    "Yeah, what do you want, 'Thena?" Jolie says, "Little pre-breakfast yelling to start the morning off right?"

    "I never yell at you," Athena says softly...which is a fact that Jolie must concede. Constantly nag, yes, but Athena never yells at her.

    Athena tells Jolie, "This operation is important. Generals Noah and Blackhead will likely be receiving new orders from the Earth Federation High Council regarding the ISRLA and the Zeon remnants. The ISRLA and Zeon know this too."

    Jolie replies, "Are you so sure there's going to be an attack? I mean, this whole thing is top secret, right? Even the press doesn't know about this conference."

    Athena shakes her head, "Federation security has been like a sieve lately. The Gundam-100 was supposed to have been a secret too. Look what happened."

    "And," Jolie points out, "you were able to get classified information about the Gellond mobile suits. Even I know that you don't have the security clearance for that info, 'Thena."

    Athena grins slightly, "You're learning."

    "So then just how did you get the data?" Jolie asks.

    Athena says cryptically, "Special Forces officers are like magicians. Both conjure things impossibly out of thin air, and both will never tell you how..."






    ************************************************** *************


    Eighteen hours later, the Earth Federation Forces space shuttles Silverthread and Nightwing sit in a launch hangar of Garrison Noah, their fusion-powered engines warmed up and awaiting ignition. Maintenance technicians make final checks on both spacecrafts' external shells, which must be in optimal condition for atmospheric re-entry.

    General Bright Noah is already aboard the Silverthread, as is his counterpart, General Manron Blackhead, aboard the Nightwing.

    In the cabin of the Silverthread, General Noah records an entry into his personal log, "...hoping the conference on Earth will be productive. The ISRLA insurgency is spreading...growing stronger by the day. Our greatest fear is that it will ally itself with the surviving Neo Zeon elements in the outer solar system, particularly Phobos. I...I'm still hoping that Sayla Mass will be able to steer the ISR movement towards a more peaceful approach. Ms. Mass served under me on the White Base during the One Year War, and I trust her. Nevertheless, the need to remain vigilant is urgent as always. My hope is that the Federation High Council..."

    Nearby, the Centurion Team and four other Special Forces units are making final checks on their mobile suits. Particular attention is given to the MS's vollute re-entry packs, which they don't plan on using because the Special Forces have been assigned only to the edge of Earth's atmosphere (at which point, security forces from Earth will take over).

    Episode 6 to be continued...

  15. #95
    Senior Member ghostdarTeal'c's Avatar
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    huh...youare barely past chapter6? work faster, man....im crawling up chapter 5 now.......

  16. #96
    Moderator Ken Cheng's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by ghostdarTeal'c View Post
    huh...youare barely past chapter6? work faster, man....im crawling up chapter 5 now.......
    You're kidding. You've made that much progress in one day?

    Wow.

  17. #97
    Senior Member ghostdarTeal'c's Avatar
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    your chapters arent that long.....and my mom is off my back thats why i get to read more.... so, why dont you whip something out and post more chapters before i catch up.......

    btw, im gonna be busy today, wont be reading any so....you know what you gotta do

  18. #98
    Moderator Ken Cheng's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by ghostdarTeal'c View Post
    your chapters arent that long.....and my mom is off my back thats why i get to read more.... so, why dont you whip something out and post more chapters before i catch up.......

    btw, im gonna be busy today, wont be reading any so....you know what you gotta do
    Whew! OK, although I certainly won't be able to write at the pace you're reading. Wow.

    Any more questions or remarks, or is it all straight sailing? Are you enjoying it? Any changes you'd like to see? I'd like some input so I can start thinking about improvements.

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    Senior Member ghostdarTeal'c's Avatar
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    everything going smooth so far.....but i gotta say, id like to see the fights longer and more detailed illustrated.... i think i get that detailed syndrome from reading ROCH and LOCH.....

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    Quote Originally Posted by ghostdarTeal'c View Post
    everything going smooth so far.....but i gotta say, id like to see the fights longer and more detailed illustrated.... i think i get that detailed syndrome from reading ROCH and LOCH.....
    Really, eh? I'm going to need to work on that.

    If you'd like to collaborate with me, you could help me write the fight scenes. I kind of suck at doing them.

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