IMPORTANT!!!! To read the uncensored, profanity-laced, 'Director' Cut' version, (also the final two chapters of the fic that are not posted here) go to my site at http://hooliness.com/swifty/optrta.htm
It was a warm and sunny day, very warm and sunny day.
Nicholas Tse, who was a gorgeous hunk, was playing basketball at a basketball court. He displayed his awesome skills in basketball perfectly by making 384635835683568336 consecutive three-pointers with his eyes closed. After that, he flew over his 7-foot tall defenders for an awesome 360 degrees dunk.
"My my! He's so hunky!" Ruby Lin gushed. She was sitting at courtside.
"OH, I'M SO IN LOVE WITH HIM!" Joey Yung's eyes had turned heart-shaped.
"Me too! I dream of him everyday!" Jerry Yan agreed.
Edison Chen, who was a hunk too, wiped his sweat off from his face. "Not bad." He said to Nicholas Tse. "Not bad at all."
After saying that, he grinned a gorgeous devillish smile and drove towards Nicholas Tse with the basketball. He soared high up in the air, and did a tomahawk slam.
The two girls AND Jerry Yan squealed in excitement.
Finally, the game ended.
Edison Chen and Nicholas Tse walked off the court while wiping sweat. The two girls AND Jerry Yan rushed forward with towels in their hands.
"Get out of my way." Edison sneered. Taking out a chainsaw to saw Jerry apart.
"OH MY, HE'S SO MANLY!" Ruby Lin gasped. She threw herself upon Edison.
"I wish he could saw everyone into pieces in front of me everyday..." Joey Yung swooned. "Eh? Where's Nicholas Tse?"
Nicholas, who was so filled with angst when he walked off the basketball court, had disappeared...
Nicholas sat alone in his room. Which was conveniently pretty dark.
"I had a sad and tragic past." He said in totally bishounenly manner.
Then, there was a flashback scene.
A long time ago, Nicholas used to be a happy child, living happy lives with his parents, Deborah and Patrick Tse.
One day, while he was playing with his own toys at the living room, a group of men in black broke into the room. They mercilessly took out their shotguns and gunned Nicholas' parents in front of the child's eyes.
After that, he became an orphan, and grew up in an orphanage.
"I will avenge you, father, mother," Nicholas said quietly, tears streaming down his eyes, making him even more handsome than before. He had never smiled since then, the only way to entertain himself was reading the wonderful Ultimate Script 1 and 2 fanfics by the talented Eliar Swiftfire.
Anyway, til this day, he remembered clearly how the leader of the men in black looked like... he had a Pikachu tattooed on his buttocks...