I have some comments to make on Gu Long's style of writing, to be precise, his way of creating an unexpected plot twist in Book 3 of Lu Xiao Feng.
This came about thanks to Moinllieon's excellent translation of LXF Book 3. Which got me thinking.
Basically, Gu Long likes to introduce Plot Twists in his story, however, I find that in this instance, he _cheated_. A plot twist should not break the internal consistency of the story, and in this instance I feel that Gu Long did just that.
Ye Gu Cheng (YGC) had faked his poisoning and injury in the earlier chapters. Now, before the whole scheme was revealed, it would be fine if GL had written of YGC's fake injury and inner feelings from the perspective of an onlooker, say LXF. However, what GL did was to write it from the Narrator's and YGC's viewpoint, that gave the reader the impression that YGC was really injured.
Here is the relevant text.
而现在……风从窗外吹进来,残破的窗户响声如落叶,屋子还是带着种连风都吹不
散的恶臭。他知道他的伤口已完全溃烂,就像是生了蛆的臭肉一样。
他本是个孤高而尊贵的人,现在却像是条受伤的野狗般躲在这黑洞里,这种折磨和
痛苦,本是他死也不愿忍受的可是他一定要忍受。
因为他一定要活到九月十五!秋声寂寂,秋风萧索,这漫漫的长夜,却叫他如何度
过?假如现在能有个亲人,有个朋友陪着他,那情况也许会好得多。怎奈他偏偏命中注
定了是个孤独的人,从不愿接受别人的友情,也从不肯将感情付给别人。他忽然发觉这
竟是他一生中第一次想到自己也需要个朋友。
他又想了很多事,想起了他每日晨昏,从无间断的苦练,想起了他的对手在他剑下
流出来的鲜血,也想起了那碧海青天,那黄金般灿烂的阳光,白玉般美丽的浮云……
他想死,又不想死。一个人的生命中,为什么总是要有这么多无可奈何的矛盾?虽
然他也知道这么样做对他的伤势并没有帮助,甚至无异是在饮鸩止渴。但他只能这么样
做。
Including the English version as well (Courtesy of Moinllieon's translation).
But now... The wind blew in through the window, causing the ripped and torn curtain to flap loudly like the falling leafs. The room was still filled with a stench that not even the wind could disperse. He knew by now that his wound had completely festered, as if it was a maggot-filled piece of meat.
He was a proud man, but now he was hiding in some hole somewhere like a wild dog. This kind of torture and humiliation was something that he would rather die than face, but face it he must.
Because he must live until September 15th! The wind breezed by, the night sounded cold. How could he possibly make it through these long nights?
If he had a relative or a friend with him right now, the situation might be a lot better. But pity he was fated to be alone in his life, to always reject other people's overture for friendship. He suddenly discovered that this was the first time in his life he realized that he needed a friend too.
He thought about a lot of stuff he never did before. He thought about how he would always train non-stop in the morning, the blood of his foes flowing out from underneath his sword, but he also thought of the ocean colored sky, the spectacularly bright sun, the beautiful, jade like clouds....
He wanted to die, and at the same time did not want to die. Why must there be so much unresolvable conflicts in a person's life?
Puss oozed out of his wounds again, as the stench intensified some more. He thought about getting up and cleaning the wound off a little and switch the bandage once again.
Even though he knew that doing this would not help his wound, almost to the point of exacerbating it, but it was all he could do.
So, GL had written about the _fake_ injury as if it was real. This would be fair if it was written as seen from the perspective of a 3rd party (not the narrator or YGC). Compare this to say, Jin Yong and the hypocritical Yue Bu Qun. When YBQ was being a hypocrite, JY did not write about his fake intentions from YBQ's own viewpoint, he wrote only about YBQ's outward actions and speech as seen and heard from 3rd parties. Thus, internal consistency was maintained.
If GL wanted the plot twist, he should have shown YGC's supposed injury as seen from 3rd parties. By writing of the pain and despair of the injury from YGC's viewpoint, it breaks the internal consistency of the story since YGC would not be feeling any real pain or despair at that point.
Any comments?