Chapter 2 - Mistakenly Breaking Into a Secret Cave
(Translated by Foxs, Edited by Eliza Bennet)
“This woman is an iceberg, if you want to move her, be careful, your hand will catch frostbite!”
The sparkling-like-wine eyes, the transparent-like-crystal, light-as-a-feather, soft silk gown in apple green. This iceberg-like woman did indeed sit here, opposite to Fang Yufei.
“But you must be careful nonetheless; icebergs are very slippery, you might slip down and fall.”
Fang Yufei was smiling. He smiled as he raised his cup toward Lu Xiaofeng.
Lu Xiaofeng also smiled. He laughed hard.
Fang Yufei: "I heard you can laugh even though you are extremely angry?"
Lu Xiaofeng did not stop laughing.
Fang Yufei's smile turned into a forced smile: "I know you are angry with me; but I have warned you!"
Lu Xiaofeng laughed: "I remember a friend did indeed warn me; he warned me not to climb the iceberg. That friend is called Fang Yufei."
Fang Yufei's countenance brightened: "I know you will remember."
Lu Xiaofeng: "You know? Are sure you are that Fang Yufei?"
Fang Yufei sighed. With a bitter smile he said, "Actually I wanted to disguise myself as someone else, but I am afraid I won't look authentic!"
Lu Xiaofeng: "At least you can disguise yourself as Lu Xiaofeng!"
Fang Yufei's countenance changed, even his forced smile had disappeared altogether.
Lu Xiaofeng turned his head and laughed: "How about you? Are you that Leng Ruoshuang?"
Fang Yufei suddenly opened his mouth: "She is not surnamed Leng!"
Lu Xiaofeng: "You know who she is?"
Fang Yufei: "Nobody knows her better than I do."
Lu Xiaofeng: "Why?"
Fang Yufei: "Because I was there when she was born."
Lu Xiaofeng: "So she is your Meimei."
Fang Yufei: "She is Fang Yuxiang."
Lu Xiaofeng laughed again.
The one sitting in between these brother and sister was wearing a very exquisite outfit; his appearance looked very refined, his demeanor was like a highly educated middle-age scholar. His facial features were delicate; his lips red and his teeth white. In his younger days certainly a lot of people would say that he looked like a child. Now that he had advanced in years, Lu Xiaofeng could still say that he looked like a girl.
This man was also laughing.
Lu Xiaofeng was looking at him: "Since she is Fang Yuxiang, you must be the Blue Beard."
Blue Beard: "Do you have any feng [Phoenix]?"
Lu Xiaofeng: "I don't."
Blue Beard: "Since Lu Xiaofeng [little phoenix] can have no phoenix, then the Blue Beard can also have no beard."
Lu Xiaofeng stared at him for half a day. With a bitter smile he said, "What you said make a lot of sense. But I still don't understand; a man like you, why are you called the Blue Beard?"
Blue Beard: "Operating a gambling establishment is not an easy matter. You don't want to eat others, but others want to eat you. A man with my look should not have earned his rice from this line of work."
Lu Xiaofeng: "Because others saw your delicate and refined features, they thought you are an easy target to be bullied, so they wanted to eat you."
Blue Beard nodded and sighed: "Therefore, I need to find another way."
Lu Xiaofeng: "What way?"
Blue Beard did not answer this question right away; he turned his head around and used his long sleeve to cover his face.
When he turned back, his face had changed, he turned into a dark-faced, bucked-tooth, with thick eyebrows and glowering eyes, man. On top of that, his mouth was covered with a beard, a black with tinge of blue, full beard.
Lu Xiaofeng was startled, but suddenly he laughed and said, "I understand it now. The Blue Beard actually has two personalities. You really have not disappointed me."
Blue Beard also laughed and said, "Lu Xiaofeng is truly Lu Xiaofeng. You also have not disappointed me."
Lu Xiaofeng: "Oh?"
Blue Beard: "We have calculated before, that sooner or later you will find this place!"
Lu Xiaofeng sighed: "I did not think that I would be able to find this place."
Blue Beard: "But you have come."
Lu Xiaofeng: "That was because my luck was good, I met a boy who can imitate a dog's bark."
Blue Beard: "Boys who can imitate dogs' bark are many."
Lu Xiaofeng: "But some people not only can imitate a dog's bark, as soon as they open their mouths, they can produce all kinds of sound!"
Blue Beard smiled: "I know that kind of people; they can imitate the sound or running water, the sound of a carriage going over the bridge, the voices of many people shopping in the marketplace and haggling over the price. They can imitate all kinds of noise very well."
Lu Xiaofeng: "It seems to me that this person not only can imitate sounds, he also masters ventriloquism!"
Blue Beard said with a laugh, "I did not know you are an expert in this matter."
Lu Xiaofeng: "Out of a hundred different skills, I am an expert in at least 80. It should be easy for a man like me to get rich, it's a pity that I have one weakness!"
Blue Beard: "Oh?"
Lu Xiaofeng: "I like women, especially women who I should not like." He sighed and then continued, "Therefore, although I am smart and competent, I often fall under a woman's trickery."
Blue Beard smiled: "A man who has never fallen under a woman's trickery cannot be considered a true man!"
Lu Xiaofeng sighed: "It was precisely because I am a genuine-article-and-reasonably-priced man that I volunteered to be your wife's bodyguard, to accompany her sitting in that carriage going around in circle. Just like a fool I obediently let her to cover my eyes."
Blue Beard: "At that time you did not think that she would bring you back here?"
Lu Xiaofeng: "It was not until I met that boy that I thought the night market and the running water were all in someone's mouth."
Blue Beard laughed: "Not only this person knows ventriloquism, he can also drive a carriage."
Lu Xiaofeng: "The sound in that empty room, certainly also came from his lips!"
Blue Beard: "No."
Lu Xiaofeng was startled: "No? An empty room can also produce sounds?"
Blue Beard: "The empty room is actually located underneath the gambling hall. If the vent is opened, the noise from above will be transmitted down."
With a bitter smile Lu Xiaofeng said, "No wonder I could not think of how he could get out of that room!"
Blue Beard: "And now you certainly have figured out why we did this?"
Lu Xiaofeng said, "You intentionally wanted me to be totally disoriented so that I won't be able to figure out where exactly I was last night, and then you masquerade yourself as me and did all kinds of crime and let me be the scapegoat!"
Blue Beard: "Wrong!
Lu Xiaofeng: "Wrong? Really?"
Blue Beard: "We do not want you to be the scapegoat. Not at all. We only want you to do one thing for us!"
Fang Yufei joined in: "If you are successful, not only we will immediately wash your name clean, we will also give you anything you care to ask for!"
With a cold laugh Lu Xiaofeng said, "What if I want to be your brother-in-law? Can I?"
Blue Beard: "You can." He smiled and continued, "Friends are like hands and feet, wives are like clothes. You can change clothes anytime you like!"
Lu Xiaofeng: "How many times have you changed?"
Blue Beard: "Only once. I traded four to get one!"
Lu Xiaofeng burst out in laughter: "I am surprised someone like you can also make a losing business deal."
There were several scrolls of paper arranged on the shelf behind them. The Blue Beard took a scroll and handed it over to Lu Xiaofeng.
Lu Xiaofeng asked: "Who drew this painting?"
Blue Beard: "Li Shentong!" [lit. divine child, a prodigy]
Lu Xiaofeng: "What kind of person is Li Shentong?"
Blue Beard: "He is my former wife's younger brother!"
Actually, Lu Xiaofeng had received the painting, but as soon as he heard it, he pushed the scroll back. "Other people's paintings, I might be interested in looking. But this fellow's painting, no, thank you."
Blue Beard smiled: "There is no harm in you looking at this painting. Regardless of how dreadful a painting might be, it won't frighten you to death just by looking at it once or twice."
With a bitter smile Lu Xiaofeng said, "I am not afraid to be frightened to death, I only afraid I will die of aggravation." However, he took the scroll and unfolded it anyway.