Rejecting someone you actually do like

[Trinie]

It's not fate. It's the girl's lack of confidence in herself and the guy that caused it. Maybe if the guy is less attractive and popular, she would have accepted him. And she kept focusing on the physical attraction part. One example of what she wrote.

Ok, I guess the timing just isn't right then... Maybe in the future when she grows in her confidence, but then that guy will probably be with someone else. I think she should not have focused so much on the physical attraction part because that is something should be shortlived in a relationship if you want it to last.

[xJadedx]

Ok, I guess the timing just isn't right then... Maybe in the future when she grows in her confidence, but then that guy will probably be with someone else. I think she should not have focused so much on the physical attraction part because that is something should be shortlived in a relationship if you want it to last.

I agree that she should have had more confidence in herself. That is important for anyone who wants to pursue a relationship (or anything in life, really). Confidence can make a person appear more attractive, both physically and emotionally.

But I have to disagree with physical attraction being something that "should be shortlived in a relationship if you want it to last." Physical attraction should not be the only important factor in a lasting relationship, obviously. But it still remains one of the important factors in a lasting relationship, among others such as personality, intelligence, and other traits. Physical attraction is something that will always be present in a relationship, though it may come in different forms as the relationship progresses. It is not something a person should cast aside if you want your relationship to last and especially if you want a happy relationship.

[Trinie]

I agree that she should have had more confidence in herself. That is important for anyone who wants to pursue a relationship (or anything in life, really). Confidence can make a person appear more attractive, both physically and emotionally.

But I have to disagree with physical attraction being something that "should be shortlived in a relationship if you want it to last." Physical attraction should not be the only important factor in a lasting relationship, obviously. But it still remains one of the important factors in a lasting relationship, among others such as personality, intelligence, and other traits. Physical attraction is something that will always be present in a relationship, though it may come in different forms as the relationship progresses. It is not something a person should cast aside if you want your relationship to last and especially if you want a happy relationship.

Yea confidence is something really important and shapes who you are.

Ok, I guess you are right, but what I meant was that physical attraction should not be the only thing that makes your relationship a lasting one. No wonder married women are still so vain. Even some guys that I know admit that they like their wife because they think she is pretty, cute or beautiful so yea, physical attraction will continue to be important no matter what...

[Bangs]

Why oh why would a girl get mad if she rejects a guy and the guy stops pursuing her????

First of all, guys are not pets, we do have feelings. If a girl said NO, then it means no, why would a guy embarass himself anylonger?

I don't get it. Girls are always saying the opposite of what they really want. Ladies, just be honest with yourselves, it makes a whole lot of difference.

[jiang bao]

I think women are brought up under a set of guidelines where they feel like they have to be nice rather than tell the truth. So they in effect consciously or subconsciously lie to themselves, creating a double standard. What they do is how they really feel, but what they say is what they think they should say. For example, in surveys, they would never honestly answer money and looks are most important. They would say PC things like sense of humor and kindness are most important—these things are parts of a likeable person, but they certainly are not important traits most women want in a mate. Look at it this way, between a super good looking and rich guy who’s dull as a brick and selfish, and a poor as dirt and ugly as hell dude who’s really funny and kind, who do you think most women would pick?

And just to be clear, I mean women who have lots of options and can get whoever they choose.

[Trinie]

Why oh why would a girl get mad if she rejects a guy and the guy stops pursuing her????

First of all, guys are not pets, we do have feelings. If a girl said NO, then it means no, why would a guy embarass himself anylonger?

I don't get it. Girls are always saying the opposite of what they really want. Ladies, just be honest with yourselves, it makes a whole lot of difference.

Maybe she is playing hard to get?? If the guy continues then it shows how interested he is. I hate it when girls do that too. That is just soooo stupid... If she likes him, then she should have gone for it instead of act like she is all great and then when she loses him, that is when she finally regrets it.

I totally agree with you that women need to honest to themselves or else they will do things that they will regret and lose out on great guys. Life is short so we should not do things that we will really regret. It is hard to be happy if you live a life full of regret.

[expression]

Well on the other hand I do know of this guy who's been seeing a nice girl almost daily. After some time the girl asked what their relationship is like. He immediately said he's "not interested". The girl was pretty mad.

Afterwards he began calling her and asking her out again. Then she asked again and he repeated he wasn't interested. The cycle goes on.

Weird people.

[Han Solo]

Some people are just passive-aggressive.


Han solo

[jiang bao]

Well on the other hand I do know of this guy who's been seeing a nice girl almost daily. After some time the girl asked what their relationship is like. He immediately said he's "not interested". The girl was pretty mad.

Afterwards he began calling her and asking her out again. Then she asked again and he repeated he wasn't interested. The cycle goes on.

Weird people.

Sounds like this guy just wants to hang out. Generally straight men aren't interested in hanging out with girls just as friends due to dissimilar interests, but there are some who do like to have female friends to go shopping and stuff.

[Trinie]

Well on the other hand I do know of this guy who's been seeing a nice girl almost daily. After some time the girl asked what their relationship is like. He immediately said he's "not interested". The girl was pretty mad.

Afterwards he began calling her and asking her out again. Then she asked again and he repeated he wasn't interested. The cycle goes on.

Weird people.

THat guy sounds really stupid... Is he the one that is playing hard to get?? I bet one day he will regret it....

[expression]

Ah yeees. Girls and boys, playing hide and seek day by day.
> > > >


And then they grow old.

[Trinie]

Ah yeees. Girls and boys, playing hide and seek day by day.
> > > >


And then they grow old.

I think that is just really unfortunate...Yea, I guess it is the old biological time clock that will fix them...

[Ken Cheng]

I think that is just really unfortunate...Yea, I guess it is the old biological time clock that will fix them...

One of the problems is that the biological clock and the social clock are out of sync and have been for centuries, and the disparity seems to be growing worse with each passing generation. Going strictly on BIOLOGY, human beings should begin reproducing at age thirteen or fourteen (there's a reason why all the reproductive apparatus comes to life at that time for most people), but SOCIETY keeps telling people to defer that imperative later and later and later.

What society requires people to do goes against what biology requires people to do. The price of living in civilization is increasingly turning our backs on natural biology to meet the needs of society. It's a tug-of-war that will eventually break the rope. The rope is already fraying perilously.

[Candide]

Sounds like this guy just wants to hang out. Generally straight men aren't interested in hanging out with girls just as friends due to dissimilar interests, but there are some who do like to have female friends to go shopping and stuff.

Sounds like he's still (barely) hiding in the closet and needs to hang out with some chick just to show his parents that he's apparently not fuh-lamin' yet and there's no need for the old folks to rewrite their will.

[expression]

Sounds like he's still (barely) hiding in the closet and needs to hang out with some chick just to show his parents that he's apparently not fuh-lamin' yet and there's no need for the old folks to rewrite their will.

Very sound judgment Sir. I'd have come to the same conclusion if not for the fact that he seems to call on the girl more furiously when he saw other guys hitting on her. So we all decided he's just one clueless nerd with commitment issues. He should probably hang out with you more.

What society requires people to do goes against what biology requires people to do. The price of living in civilization is increasingly turning our backs on natural biology to meet the needs of society. It's a tug-of-war that will eventually break the rope. The rope is already fraying perilously.

Well said, Kenny.

[Candide]

:I'd have come to the same conclusion if not for the fact that he seems to call on the girl more furiously when he saw other guys hitting on her.

It doesn't necessarily mean that he's a big fan of vaginas. Take two girls who are BFFs and attached at the hips. If one starts to see some guy, the other will be afraid that she may "lose" her friend and will try to cling on to her friend more desperately than ever. I'm sure you've seen this happen plenty of times. In fact, that's how a lot of guys get remotely c0ckblocked.

Now replace one of the two girls with a gay guy. Pretty much the same thing.

I still vote for "he loves the c0ck". You guys should start calling him that. And if he happens to be the opposite, then it may serve as an invaluable wake-up call.

He should probably hang out with you more.

No thanks, I only just managed to get rid of some clueless nerds who tailgate me everywhere!

[expression]

Oh dear, that's about as unfortunate a situation a girl can get into. She does seem to like the guy a lot to spend so much time on him. Maybe she should hang out with you more.

Wait, that's not too safe either.

[Candide]

Maybe she should hang out with you more.

Wait, that's not too safe either.

A safe life is a boring life.

Would you rather that your girl gets stuck in a frustrating situation or go off on a dangerous exciting ride?

[expression]

Yes yes you're right. Lemme show her your hot avatar and see what she thinks...

[So Yen]

he is a shame to all the guys around the world he reminds me of DY.

how can be be happy being the "back up" guy

Sometimes, just sometimes, being the back up or rebound works out for the best.