New Moon

[GuGu]

Um, why do you think I paid $10 to see this crap?



Yes he is. And I think he's a great kid

why do you love him? is it how he looks? and you're gay?

[remember_Cedric]

Thanks for the sharing #18! You have interestingly "dissected" the actors. Taylor is more of a down-to-earth guy, IMO. Rob seems like a punk with some personality.

[PJ]

why do you love him? is it how he looks? and you're gay?

You seem shocked. HELLO! Where have you been?

Anyway, it isn't all about looks. It's rather superficial and forgettable.

[PJ]

Thanks for the sharing #18! You have interestingly "dissected" the actors. Taylor is more of a down-to-earth guy, IMO. Rob seems like a punk with some personality.

Yep, and Kristen seems to be a total stuck-up at times. But then there are moments when she seems totally angelic in an untouchable way. When she's with Taylor in real life, I always think their chemistry totally resembles that of the movie, where he is sincere about her and she's just "using" him.

Yes, I would agree Rob (and Kristen) have more personality (than Taylor). But Taylor's sense of humility trumps all

[GuGu]

You seem shocked. HELLO! Where have you been?

Anyway, it isn't all about looks. It's rather superficial and forgettable.

nah-ah! what's going on here? i'm really confused. is this the same PJ? you're a boy and you don't like boys! are you just playing a joke?

[remember_Cedric]

nah-ah! what's going on here? i'm really confused. is this the same PJ? you're a boy and you don't like boys! are you just playing a joke?

*raps* Whether it's serious or play, it's okay! Nevermind even if he is gay!

[PJ]

i'm really confused.

Good. I aim to please.

Is this the same PJ?

Is this the same GuGu?

*raps* Whether it's serious or play, it's okay! Nevermind even if he is gay!

Good one!

Alright, back to the movie

[QF]

Ninja Assassin was better.

QF

[Banh Mi]

Here's a review of the first book from http://avphibes.livejournal.com/370683.html

Hysterically funny. Go ahead and thump me for reposting stuff... frankly, work's been kicking my rear lately, and I haven't been training much. Maybe once a day, 6 days a week... which I know makes you laugh, sorry. I'm obsessed. But we have done some nice work in the morning classes recently-- following the Roger plan of pass, mount, choke. I'm actually pretty decent at surviving and escaping, just need to improve my (yes, broken record here) sweeps and attacks.

So-- without further ado-- hilarity ensues. This is entirely the work of A.V. Phibes and their review appears originally here on their LiveJournal site.

If I could review "Twilight" (the book) in three letters, they would be "WTF"

So I'm sure at this point everyone has heard of this hit book Twilight and the movie thereof. While I have not seen the movie, I have just finished the book and the thought that kept coming to mind throughout was: Are you ****ing kidding me?

Look, this book is bad. Shockingly bad. But it's bad in that epic, unselfconscious sort of way that makes me kind of obsessed with it, in the same way I'm obsessed with Showgirls and Trapped in the closet. Although it's bad, it's not that surprising that it's popular. It's full of romantic grandiosity and shoots straight to the heart of teenage girl fantasies about being special and unique and being loved madly by a dreamy bad boy. But... oh god... IT'S SO BAD!

First off, I feel like I need to clarify that I'm not some McSnobbersons who sniffs disdainfully at anything that's not Lit-rah-chah. I heart good writing, but I'm not ashamed to get down with a little popular entertainment. I thought the Harry Potter series was delightful, and in my early 20's I devoured Anne Rice's Vampire Chronicles and loved every minute of it. But, for reals, Stephanie Meyer make J.K Rowling and Anne Rice look like Nobokov and Dostoyevsky. See, a lot of times I evaluate entertainments on the "could I have done that?" scale. And, honestly, The Harry Potter series and the Vampire Chronicles were pretty detailed with lots of characters and multi-layered plots, and I'm not sure I could pull something like that off. "Twilight," however, I'm pretty sure I could have written piss drunk, typing with my nose.

If someone had told me that this book was written by a 15 year old who'd never kissed a boy, I would have said "well, that makes perfect sense. The tone and writing level is pretty much what I would have done when I was a 15 year old who'd never kissed a boy." It's the fact that it was written by a grown-up mother of 3 with an English degree that amplifies the WTF factor. What? How? It made me want to travel back in time, find my 15 year old self and force her to drop out of school, get her GED and start cranking out overwrought fantasy romance novels.

If you have not read the book, here is the plot:

A girl (Bella) leaves her flaky Mom and moves to a small, rainy town to live with her dad. There's a really hot boy (Edward) who keeps giving her mixed signals that make her obsessed with him. He saves her from a car crash. She finds out he's a vampire. She decides she's in love with him. He starts being nice to her and he's in love with her too! But, uh oh! her blood smells delicious and he wants to kill her! But he controls himself and they kiss! Yay!

Not a lot going on, right? THAT'S 350 ****ING PAGES OF THE BOOK! The last 150 pages consists of a bad vampire who decides he wants to kill Bella for sport and she has to run away with the help of Edward's hot vampire family, but bad vampire tricks her into meeting him at a dance studio and beats her up and OMG Edward saves her just before he kills her. Then they go to Prom. The end.

OH OH OH... and the bestest part of all: The reason vampires can't go out in the sun? Because they're sparkly. Yes, sparkly. REALLY. I'm going to extrapolate from this that they also ride unicorns and crap gumdrops. I had to put down the book at that point and crack up.

Seriously. 500 pages. Of course, if they cut out Bella's tedious run-throughs of her daily class schedule and the ten million ridiculously adjectivey descriptions of how hot Edward is, the book would probably be a pamphlet. And don't presume that those extra pages were used on extraneous things like, say, character development.. ha ha ho... you wish! There isn't a character in this book who has more depth than a kiddie pool, and the protagonist, Bella, is probably the most spot-on example of a Mary Sue Character since Mary Sue.

But here's the thing... I was kind of looking forward to this book being page-turning popcorn, but at about the halfway mark I started feeling this strange, undefined feeling of frustration that went beyond the fact that there seemed to be no plot. I couldn't put my finger on it... and then, it hit me: The book was written in the style of erotica and I was waiting for the sex. So that part of my brain that likes to spank it to bad literotica.com stores... or, you know, that WOULD if I were into that sort of thing *cough*... was impatient to get the show on the road. Subconsciously, my mind was saying "GET TO THE ****ING ALREADY!" and once my conscious mind figured that out, I was like "This book was written by a Mormon. There will be no ****ing." And then, admittedly, I was a little annoyed. I almost wanted to write the sex scenes myself. They would probably go a little something like this:

I gasped as Edward unzipped his gorgeous, godlike pants, revealing his smooth, white, marble cock. He glared at me with his burning topaz eyes as my fingertips brushed his cold, sparkling, granite dick. My heartbeat quickened. My breath caught. I didn't deserve this. How could I, clumsy, ordinary, plain, clumsy Bella Swan who was only asked to the dance by 3 different lovestruck boys, be so close to a cock so gorgeous, scintillating and godlike? It was like the pale marble cock of Adonis.

In a quick, graceful motion, Edward turned and glared at me. "Don't you see Bella?" he said as he held me in his strong grasp and dry-humped my thigh with annoyance, "I'm a danger to you! You should have nothing to do with me! Every moment you're risking your life!"

"Edward" I gasped "I love you. I will love you forever!" I was in agony thinking of losing him and never again touching his pale, white, cold, gorgeous, sparkling, marble, granite, dazzling, godlike, scintillating Adonis cock. How would I live? He was my life.

He glared at me again with his dazzling, golden eyes and told me with his gorgeous, pale lips "There's something I haven't told you. Something else about my kind."

"What Edward?" I asked breathlessly, "I will love you no matter what. Forever."

He brushed his cold, gorgeous, marble lips close to my clumsy, ordinary ears and whispered "We..."

"What, Edward? I love you. Forever. You can tell me anything."

He gave me his crooked grin and said, "We ejaculate rainbows."

[Guo Xiang]

Here's a review of the first book from

Love this review! Totally!

[remember_Cedric]

I like the wolf better! (must be the animal thing....) The most lively character in the movie, IMO, has to be Alice Cullen, who is also the most likeable female character. She projects that friendly persona.

Bella is a whiner.

P/s: Odd enough, I like the sidekicks better the lead more than half the time! It's like how I like Viktor, Cedric and Ronald better than Harry in HP, Alice (much) better than Bella vs Jacob (much) better than Edward. In some other movies too, I took more notice of the sidekicks than the leads.

[PJ]

By the way, I meant to reply to this earlier:

nor do I understand the fascination with Taylor Lautner (or any of the other cast members). He has a nice body, but his face is so mediocre. White guys of his caliber are a dime a dozen in SoCal.

There may be others with similar physical features as Taylor, but his incredible work ethic and sense of humility stand out for a 17 year old. And that's what makes him special.

[Cesare]

I like the wolf better! (must be the animal thing....) The most lively character in the movie, IMO, has to be Alice Cullen, who is also the most likeable female character. She projects that friendly persona.

Frankly, of all the vampires and wolves that appear in this (and the previous) film, I liked Laurent best. That guy was cool. Not to mention good-looking. Had a lovely accent, too. Pity he got killed off so soon...;-p (Bad wolves.)

[Ren Ying Ying]

Thanks for the sharing #18! You have interestingly "dissected" the actors. Taylor is more of a down-to-earth guy, IMO. Rob seems like a punk with some personality.

i remember reading somewhere online where they were interviewing robert patterson and he totally lashed out on edward the character. Saying that he's a creepy stalking and what not. I thought that was pretty funny. Now, if only he had better acting skills.

[acluett]

I thought the movie was a major step-up from the first! I felt that Twilight was a major disappointment and I didn't like Hardwicke's approach to it. I have to say that after Twilight, New Moon well exceeds my expectations and I simply loved it. The fight and action in Volterra worked in well because, as a movie, it needs to be more visual. I am a massive fan of the books - so of course I will always prefer the books - but as an interpretation of the books, New Moon succeeded where Twilight just didn't.

[KarlDV]

I liked the first one..... now this said I was okay but I felt that there was something missing, maybe they made the characters a little bit more colorful...

[Dennis Chen]

I think it's shameful how some women admit they find the guy who plays Jacob hot. That's like me saying I think Hannah Montana is hot.

<--- Team Edward.

[Ren Ying Ying]

I think it's shameful how some women admit they find the guy who plays Jacob hot. That's like me saying I think Hannah Montana is hot.

<--- Team Edward.

well, you are entitled to think miley cirus hot is you like. no one will count it against you

[Dennis Chen]

well, you are entitled to think miley cirus hot is you like. no one will count it against you

No one except parents with children. As well they should if I make such a claim.

There's a (understandable) stigma against men and proclamations of attraction to anybody under the age of 18. It shouldn't be different with women.

[Ren Ying Ying]

No one except parents with children. As well they should if I make such a claim.

There's a (understandable) stigma against men and proclamations of attraction to anybody under the age of 18. It shouldn't be different with women.

i think miley cirus is a little more off because of her previous reputation as hannah montana--which is highly featured towards younger teens and children (and she was very young herself back then). Thus, the childish image is always going to be stuck with her--unless she starts doing completely outragous or reveal some big scandal to change her reputation. So until she gets a complete image change, even when she's 25, i'm going to think 13 yr old hannah montana. (but then again, I don't go around proclaiming miley cirus is hot, so I don't know exactly what responses i'll get when she is that age...)

anyways, point being, plenty of "actors/singers" come out at 16/17ish. the only thing is, with the speed teenagers are growing at these days, some are going to appear older and others younger. heck, if no one told me, i wouldn't have known the kid who plays jacob is actually 17.