Teacher/Student Romantic Relationships

[Sourplum]

Before anyone jumps down my throat, I should say that this situation applies when the student has already graduated from secondary/high school, and are at least 18. Do you think teachers and students should be able to have a romantic relationship once the student is an adult and not attending school anymore?

And moreover, have anyone ever had a crush/dated their teacher after graduation, or know anyone who has? And what do you think of Male/Male or Female/Female teacher student relationships, and does this change anything?

And what about students who 'make the first move' on a teacher? Ok, I don't mean you get intimidate all a sudden and make out with them out of nowhere.. what I mean, is, do you think it is acceptable for a student to come to a teacher and confess their feelings to them? And if they want to take this further?

[Guo Xiang ( :]

My dad is almost 7 years my mom's senior. He was a student teacher at her college. So yeah, I think it's fine.

[jiang bao]

After the student-teacher relationship is over, it’s fair game. My HS homeroom teacher’s wife is his former student. Though there are whispers that there were something going on before she graduated. But who knows.

[Candide]

Confess feelings? That gay Asian pop sh!t is always inappropriate, regardless of the types of relationship.

[kidd]

Do you think teachers and students should be able to have a romantic relationship once the student is an adult and not attending school anymore?

The student is an adult and not attending school anymore. So, what's the problem?

[Extremer88]

I believe if the age gap is huge, as normally that is the case between teachers/lecturers and students, problems could arise over time if they were to be together.

I would say yes, if the age gap is at most 3-4 years old.

[kidd]

I believe if the age gap is huge, as normally that is the case between teachers/lecturers and students, problems could arise over time if they were to be together.

I would say yes, if the age gap is at most 3-4 years old.

That is a very conservative number. A lot of married couple has wider age gap than that.

[Extremer88]

That is a very conservative number. A lot of married couple has wider age gap than that.

It is. I do know as well that there are many married couples out there with wider age gap than 3-4 years.

Perhaps I haven't met many good examples in my life, yet.

[Sourplum]

The student is an adult and not attending school anymore. So, what's the problem?

The thing though, is that there will always be social stigmas attached to the very idea of something like that. And I think the age gap can be explained by the younger person looking for someone who is mature beyond their years to complement them.

[kidd]

The thing though, is that there will always be social stigmas attached to the very idea of something like that.

People will sooner or later forget they are once student/teacher. If some people still want to keep on harping about it, it's their problem. Most people have more important things to concern themselves about than an ex-student marrying her ex-teacher. I don't know. Maybe in the west, it's a HUGE issue. So HUGE that people still put stigma on a couple eventhough they got together after the student left school. Those people have nothing better to do.

And I think the age gap can be explained by the younger person looking for someone who is mature beyond their years to complement them.

Student/teacher doesn't necessary must have huge age gap like 20 years. It can be like Guo Xiang's dad and mom, who were only 7 years apart. There might be a problem if a couple is 20 years apart, but 7-8 years or even 10 is ok.

[clfan]

let me ask this questions,
i saw many singers who dated and married their producers, isn't that also a unequal balance of power here? people said that students date teachers for grades, why don't they said the same thing, the singers date their producers in exchage for more favor in the music industry or more cds coming out, or even have their producers spend more time and favor them in their products.

society don't make a big deal when celine dion married her producer, which he is older plus was in control of her music career didn't they, then i don't see the problem with a grad-student who in their 30's date their professor when she/he no longer in their class or graduated.

[Trien Chieu]

After the student-teacher relationship is over, it’s fair game. My HS homeroom teacher’s wife is his former student. Though there are whispers that there were something going on before she graduated. But who knows.

The student is an adult and not attending school anymore. So, what's the problem?

Agree. If one is no longer have power over the other then it's ok.

[Da Bao]

If the student is no longer a student of the school AND of legal age, I don't see a problem. Having a male/male of female/female student-teacher relationship changes nothing and the previous rules still apply. If they're not student-teacher anymore, it shouldn't be a problem. As long as nothing happens when they're still student-teacher, but if there is, then problems would come up. Is the student dating the teacher for grades? And it brings to question what kind of morals the teacher has if he/she is dating a student.

[goodrick]

Before anyone jumps down my throat, I should say that this situation applies when the student has already graduated from secondary/high school, and are at least 18. Do you think teachers and students should be able to have a romantic relationship once the student is an adult and not attending school anymore?

And moreover, have anyone ever had a crush/dated their teacher after graduation, or know anyone who has? And what do you think of Male/Male or Female/Female teacher student relationships, and does this change anything?

And what about students who 'make the first move' on a teacher? Ok, I don't mean you get intimidate all a sudden and make out with them out of nowhere.. what I mean, is, do you think it is acceptable for a student to come to a teacher and confess their feelings to them? And if they want to take this further?

In the situation that you described, I think it is quite alright for a ex-student/ex-teacher to have a romantic relationship once they are no longer student/teacher. I do however think it is inappropriate to have a romantic relationship while you are a student-teacher. It is not exactly incest but kinda sorta a little bit like it.

[Guo Xiang]

In the situation that you described, I think it is quite alright for a ex-student/ex-teacher to have a romantic relationship once they are no longer student/teacher. I do however think it is inappropriate to have a romantic relationship while you are a student-teacher. It is not exactly incest but kinda sorta a little bit like it.

Not only that - it could lead to biasness in judgment, treatment and grading.

[remember_Cedric]

This thing strike my mind recently which reminds me I actually known of a real life Teacher/Student romance relationship. It took place in a private school though, however, the relationship is a T/SRR undeniably.

Story 1:

The TIS (Teacher-In-Story) taught me in a few of my modules back then, he is a friendly and chatty guy (sometimes, I felt like he talks for the sake of talking). I met him often in the school transport and gradually, he began to talking to me and telling me stuff (gossips of that school). It was after sometime, once, he volunteerily shared about his personal stuff and volunteered infor like "his wife was his student once upon a time" (yes, you might've guessed, he just wanted to talk ). I briefly remember, he said that they fell in love while he was still his student in a degree course.

By judging from his appearance, the guy is about early 40s, the eldest daughter is about 5, so you could roughly workout the age when the couple met. I can't remember the wife's age exactly but I don't think their ages are very far apart (judging from her pictures, she doesn't look that young). In this case, I don't see the problem with the T/SRR even it's before graduation. Or, maybe it felt less awkward because it didn't took place while I was a student in that class.

Story 2:

Another real life T/SRR story (?) that took place during my elementary years (to be exact, it's Primary four). A kinky one! This one probably would strike a chord as a relationship that happened in Majo no Jōken (魔女の条件?) (Terms of a witch), except that the charmer in this story isn't as emo and problematic yet a dignified class rep. And, during those days, mindset of people are considerably more conservative so nothing sizzling happened except the two exchanging eye contacts and the teacher-in-distress paid extra attention and shower more concern on the charmer boy.... well, I'd save the details unless you guys wanna know more about what happened from time to time that reveals the kinky relationship.

The lady teacher should be in her early 20s). As it seems, it's definitely a crush, and a mutual one. You know what I mean

[Guo Xiang]

This thing strike my mind recently which reminds me I actually known of a real life Teacher/Student romance relationship. It took place in a private school though, however, the relationship is a T/SRR undeniably.

Story 1:

The TIS (Teacher-In-Story) taught me in a few of my modules back then, he is a friendly and chatty guy (sometimes, I felt like he talks for the sake of talking). I met him often in the school transport and gradually, he began to talking to me and telling me stuff (gossips of that school). It was after sometime, once, he volunteerily shared about his personal stuff and volunteered infor like "his wife was his student once upon a time" (yes, you might've guessed, he just wanted to talk ). I briefly remember, he said that they fell in love while he was still his student in a degree course.

By judging from his appearance, the guy is about early 40s, the eldest daughter is about 5, so you could roughly workout the age when the couple met. I can't remember the wife's age exactly but I don't think their ages are very far apart (judging from her pictures, she doesn't look that young). In this case, I don't see the problem with the T/SRR even it's before graduation. Or, maybe it felt less awkward because it didn't took place while I was a student in that class.

Story 2:

Another real life T/SRR story (?) that took place during my elementary years (to be exact, it's Primary four). A kinky one! This one probably would strike a chord as a relationship that happened in Majo no Jōken (魔女の条件?) (Terms of a witch), except that the charmer in this story isn't as emo and problematic yet a dignified class rep. And, during those days, mindset of people are considerably more conservative so nothing sizzling happened except the two exchanging eye contacts and the teacher-in-distress paid extra attention and shower more concern on the charmer boy.... well, I'd save the details unless you guys wanna know more about what happened from time to time that reveals the kinky relationship.

The lady teacher should be in her early 20s). As it seems, it's definitely a crush, and a mutual one. You know what I mean

Elementary school?? My. The boy would be at the most 12!

[remember_Cedric]

Elementary school?? My. The boy would be at the most 12!

To be exact, it's 10. But I must say, that charmer is quite mature for someone of his age. Still, it is an impossible relationship given that age gap alone.

[Lucre]

Although its possibly a case-by-case basis, but in general, it's best to avoid such relationship, as we really prefer teachers who dedicated their focus on doing their job, rather than fishing out mates in the pool of students (its not just the age gap, or maturity issue) but its best avoided. In fact, even amongst students its better not to be involved with a classmate ~ theres really a high tendency of 'shitting where you eat' problems later on. same goes with collegues, and boss-subordinate relationship.

but it all have to boil down on how you handle it. many people did screw it up, and it became an unpleasant experience.

[Trinie]

Although its possibly a case-by-case basis, but in general, it's best to avoid such relationship, as we really prefer teachers who dedicated their focus on doing their job, rather than fishing out mates in the pool of students (its not just the age gap, or maturity issue) but its best avoided. In fact, even amongst students its better not to be involved with a classmate ~ theres really a high tendency of 'shitting where you eat' problems later on. same goes with collegues, and boss-subordinate relationship.

but it all have to boil down on how you handle it. many people did screw it up, and it became an unpleasant experience.

I don't find a problem with it as long as they are no longer teacher and student.However, I personally think it is ok to have a crush during that relationship as long as you don't openly show that you favor that particular student over other students. I actually had a professor who had a wife that was our classmate. THerefore, she had to take other classes to fulfill our program's requirements since she was not allowed to take any classes that were taught by her husband.

I have some questions for you Lucre, what is wrong with classmates dating or liking each other romantically as long as they are in the same age group??? A lot of people meet in school and were classmates so what is wrong with getting involved with a classmate??? Many people met their husband/wife in school. I also don't find a problem getting involved with a collegue, but then again it does depend on where you work and what their policies are when it comes to romantic relationships. I know that in the entertainment circle, a number of companies do not allow their artists to date within the company or else they would get fired. With the boss and worker, that can be awkward but I also don't see a big problem with that either. One of my friend's sister in law's married one of their workers and she is the one of the bosses of the company so what is the big deal???

By the way, you really sound kind of like one of our other members here...