The Deer and The Cauldron

[athlonkmf]

foxs, no. I mean you said that you didn't have the time or want to scan those images in. So since I got the images myself, maybe I could just post them here for you to use if you want.

I'm not good enough to do the caption though.

As for PDF, I've been putting the chapters into an epub-file in order for me to be able to read it on my ereader, ipad and iphone without having problems with the font-size. It's for my personal use only and I won't distribute it or anything. But if you want, I can send you the epub file so you can edit/release/convert it if you wish.

This is how the book looks like on my ipad btw:

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[CFT]

athlonkmf, your epub/ipad setup looks really sweet.

[KChill]

Tsk tsk, having a beautiful woman seducing him like this, even the great mind of a genius like WXB fails to work properly.

Thanks foxs!

He is a normal guy after all when it comes down to it!

[tweety365]

He is a normal guy after all when it comes down to it!

True, WXB is very normal when it comes to all the human vices. So I suppose it is no surprise here.

[SkyWalker]

Thanks foxs.

No man can resist a beautiful woman, not even the cunning WXB!

[smurf120]

I can't find another link but try to get a copy of "Tropic Thunder" and watch all the fake trailers in the beginning!

Shang'er is much more playful and smart in the book than the adaptations - she looks out for WXB but she will joke and come to her own conclusions about things. I still have issues with Fang Yi...

[crazee]

He is a normal guy after all when it comes down to it!

Yea, even smart and careful fail to escape this trap. It looks like God made girls with the special magic that breaks down even the smartest guys....and it's called the "beauty spell", heh heh heh.
Even the smartest guy on earth in the "Legendary siblings" got stuck with a girl in the end....

[tweety365]

Even the smartest guy on earth in the "Legendary siblings" got stuck with a girl in the end....

But XYE did not get stuck with just any plain girl. He won the heart of one of the coolest female characters in Gu Long's novels.

[KChill]

But XYE did not get stuck with just any plain girl. He won the heart of one of the coolest female characters in Gu Long's novels.

Which always seemed like a bad decision for me. One of the things I like most about this novel compared to the others was his not having to choose. Seems like they always make the wrong choice....

[foxs]

Tweety, KChill, Sky, Crazee, who says women are the weaker conterparts of men? Athlon, CFT, I was thinking of formatting it just like the Trilogy, but as I said before, I don't know if I will have the motivation to scan and translate the captions. If you guys can help, that will be great. Most of the time the captions are just part of the text anyway, so you can simply find where it is and copy and paste. But sometimes it is like a narrative about certain scene. Smurf, if you find a good link, shoot it to me. Athlon, check your pm.

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A large ship was anchored by the seaside. Seeing Fang Yi's subordinates waving dark green cloth, the sailors on the ship lowered a small boat to meet them at the shore. First they took Wei Xiaobao and Fang Yi on board, and then successively brought the rest of the people on board. Seeing they were about to embark on a voyage, Yu Ba said that he was seasick and would not want to go to the sea no matter what. Wei Xiaobao did not force him, he gave him a hundred taels of silver. With a thousand gratitude and ten thousand thanks, Yu Ba returned to Shanxi.

As Wei Xiaobao entered the cabin, he noticed that it was luxuriously furnished; the floor was covered in thick carpet, there were tea, fruits and delicacies on the table, just like the parlor in the homes of princes, dukes, or high ranking officials. He mused, "Good Jiejie is treating me like this, inevitably there will be intention to harm me."

Two servants on the ship offered steamed towel for the two of them to wipe their faces with, followed by the serving of two bowls of noodles. The noodles were covered with shredded chicken; it was very delicious, the taste was different from ordinary noodles. And then he felt the hull swayed, obviously they set sail and went out to sea.

As the boat left the shore, another world was before their eyes. Fang Yi accompanied him drinking wine and playing finger-guessing game, they never stopped talking and laughing until very late at night. She took care of him first and tucked him into bed before retreating to separate room to rest for the night. The next day, she came back to help him dress and combed his hair. Wei Xiaobao thought, "Until now she does not know that I am not a eunuch; she only knew that our being husband and wife is a fake. When should I tell her the truth?"

The boat sailed for several days. One particular day the two of them were leaning on the window, enjoying the sunset on the sea. They saw the reflection of the sun like tens of thousands golden snake slithering on the surface of the sea, it was indescribably weird and wonderful. Fang Yi sighed and said, "When I go to assassinate the Tatar Emperor that day, I was so sure that I would lose my life in the Palace. Who would have known that Laotianye still protected me, unexpectedly I met you and today we enjoy this good fortune together. Good Didi, I am not clear of your lot in life. When did you enter the Palace? How did you learn martial art?"

Wei Xiaobao laughed and said, "I was just going to tell you, but I was afraid you might jump in fright, or perhaps you are so happy that you pass out."

Fang Yi leaned closer to him; with a low voice she said, "If I like what I hear, that will be best. But even if I don't like what I hear, I only want you to tell me the truth, then ... then I won't care."

"Good Jiejie," Wei Xiaobao said, "I will be honest with you, I was born in Yangzhou, Mama is from a brothel."

Fang Yi was shocked; with a trembling voice she asked, "What is your mama doing in the brothel? Is she doing laundry, cook rice, or ... or sweep the floor and pour tea?”

Wei Xiaobao saw her countenance underwent great change, her eyes showed a frightened look, instantly his heart turned ice-cold, knowing that she extremely despise the ‘brothel’. If he said honestly that his own mother was a prostitute, perhaps for the rest of his life she would never have even half a part of respect and affection. Immediately he laughed aloud and said, “When my Mama entered the brothel, she was only six or seven years old, how could she did laundry or cook rice for the people?”

Fang Yi’s countenance softened somewhat; “She was only six or seven years old?” she asked.

Wei Xiaobao said whatever came into his mind, “After the Tatars entered the Pass, they killed not a few people in Yangzhou; do you know this?” While saying that, his mind was trying to find a way to raise his mother’s dignity somewhat.

“That’s right,” Fang Yi said.

“My (maternal) grandfather was a high ranking official of the Ming Dynasty,” Wei Xiaobao said, “He took office in Yangzhou. When the Tatars broke through Yangzhou, my grandfather died in the resistance against the enemy. That time my Mama was only a little girl, wandering destitute on the street. There was a heroic, rich brothel’s patron who took pity on her, so he took her to become his servant girl. Upon further inquiry, he had a deep respect toward grandfather, so he took my Mama as his foster daughter [orig. yi nu – righteous female/daughter] and brought her home. My Mama became a ‘thousand gold’ young lady, later she married my Papa, who was a gongzi [young master/son of nobility] of Yangzhou’s famous and rich family.”

Fang Yi was half-believing, half-doubting. “So that’s how it is,” she said, “You did indeed scare me that I jumped in fright, thinking that your Mama was destitute in the brothel, being female maid of the people, serving those people who knew no shame, an extremely … bad woman.”

Growing up in the brothel, Wei Xiaobao had never thought that his own Mama was a ‘bad woman who knew no shame’, hearing Fang Yi said such things, he could not help but was secretly angry. He said in his heart, “Do you think your Mu Palace women are so great? Damn it, in my opinion they are also people who knew no shame, extremely whatever.”

Originally he was thinking of telling her his real life story in a calm, undisturbed manner, and would not hide anything from her; but now he simply boasted unguardedly, telling her how extravagant was his family in Yangzhou, giving her an exaggerated account of everything. But when he told about the halls and the rooms of his residence, the setup of the furniture, inevitably he was talking about the layout of the Lovely Spring Courtyard.

But Fang Yi did not pay any attention to his story; she said, “Is this the thing you meant when you said that you wanted to tell me something that will make me happy that I might pass out?”

Wei Xiaobao felt as if she was splashing a bucket of cold water on his head. Also, noticing how indifferent she was toward his bragging, he could not restrain his excitement from dying out; he was disinclined to tell her that he was not an eunuch. “That was it,” he said casually, “Turns out you are not happy at all.”

Fang Yi said unenthusiastically, “I am happy.” It was clear that she did not mean it.

The two of them were silent for a moment. Suddenly a stretch of land appeared on the northeastern direction. This ship was heading exactly on that direction. Fang Yi said in amazement, “Uh, what kind of place is that?”

Less than two hours later, they were getting closer to the land, and saw the verdant trees on the shore, which stretched out in both direction as far as eyes could see, the beach was covered in snow white fine sands. Fang Yi said, “We have been sailing for a few days, our heads are muddled, what do you say we go up and look around?”

“Very good,” Wei Xiaobao happily said, “It looks like a big island, I wonder if there is some fun things on the island.”

Fang Yi summoned the helmsman to the cabin and asked him the name of the island, as well as its specialty. The helmsman replied, “In answer to Miss’ question, this island is a well-known immortal island of the Eastern Sea. I heard there are immortal fruits on the island, those who ate it will have long life and won’t grow old, it’s just that only blessed people will be able to obtain it. There is no harm in Miss and Wei Xianggong to go up and try your luck.”

Fang Yi nodded. When the helmsman had left the cabin, she softly said, “I don’t care about long life and won’t grow old. These last few days I am happier than being an immortal.”

Wei Xiaobao was ecstatic; he said, “You and I can live on the island for the rest of our lives. Immortal fruits and what not, it’s not a big deal, as long as you are willing for accompany me forever, I feel like an immortal.”

Fang Yi leaned closer to him and said in gentle voice, “Me too.”

The two of them rode a small boat to go ashore, and treaded on the fine sand of the beach. Their noses caught the whiff of fragrance of flowers floating from the forest. They felt they had indeed arrived at a fairyland. “I wonder if there are people living on this island?” Fang Yi said.

Wei Xiaobao laughed and said, “I don’t think there are people, but there is a fairy whose beauty is matchless, taking her little servant along, who has just arrived on the island.”

With a very sweet smile Fang Yi said, “Good Didi, you are my little servant, and I am your little maid.”

When Wei Xiaobao heard the word ‘maid’, Wei Xiaobao suddenly remembered Shuang’er. Turning his head around, he did not see her following to the island. These past few days he had given Shuang’er a cold treatment, in his heart he was quite remorseful, but thinking that if she tagged along, he would not be too comfortable to be affectionate toward Fang Yi, so it was better that she did not come along.

Hand in hand the two of them entered the forest, the air was very thick with the fragrance of the flowers. Wei Xiaobao said, “This fragrance of the flowers is exceptionally thick, could the flowers be immortal flowers?” Taking a few steps forward, suddenly he heard rustling noise of the grass, followed by a yellow shadow flashed before his eyes, seven or eight yellow with black stripes vipers fled out. “Aiyo!” Wei Xiaobao cried out. Pulling Fang Yi’s hand, he turned around and ran. But after taking only one step, seven or eight snakes blocked their way, their bodies were blood red, their tongues flicking in and out, hissing noisily. The snakes’ heads were all triangular, an obvious sign that they all had acute poison.

Fang Yi stepped in front of Wei Xiaobao’s body, pulling her saber and brandishing it she called out, “Run away quickly, I’ll block the vipers!”

But how could Wei Xiaobao be willing to forgo yi qi like this, running for his life alone? Busily he drew his dagger and said, “We’ll go from this side!” Pulling Fang Yi along, he bolted off to the side. But after only two steps, he felt something cold on his neck, a snake dangled down from a tree and coiled itself around his neck, scaring him that his soul flew out to the sky, he cried out loudly.

Fang Yi reached out to pull the snake’s body. “No, you can’t do that!” Wei Xiaobao cried out. The snake turned its head around and bit the back of Fang Yi’s hand firmly and did not let her go. Wei Xiaobao brandished the dagger and chopped the snake’s head clean. By this time, a viper had wrapped itself on each one of their legs. Wei Xiaobao brandished his dagger to chop their heads, but he felt his left leg went numb, a viper had bitten him.

Fang Yi tossed away her single-blade saber and embraced him, crying, “We, husband and wife, will die in here today.” Relying on the sharpness of his dagger, Wei Xiaobao chopped one snake with every wave of the dagger, but more and more snakes came out of the forest. The two of them desperately trying to get out of the forest, their bodies had been bitten seven eight times each. Wei Xiaobao felt a dizzy spell, he was gradually losing his consciousness. Looking toward the ocean, he saw the little boat was sailing back to the big ship, it was already quite some distance away from the shore. Fang Yi called several times, but how could the sailors on the boat hear her?

Fang Yi rolled up Wei Xiaobao’s trouser, she bent down and sucked up the snake venom from his leg. Wei Xiaobao was startled, “No … don’t!” he said.

Suddenly they heard footsteps behind them, someone was saying, “What are you doing here? Aren’t you afraid to die?”

Wei Xiaobao turned his head around, and saw three middle-aged men. “Dashu [big uncle] help,” he hastily called out, “We are bitten by the snakes.”

One man took out a pill from his pocket, put it in his own mouth and chewed it for a moment, and then spread it on the snake bites on Wei Xiaobao’s body. Wei Xiaobao said, “Please … please help her first.” By now his own legs had already turned black, his entire body had lost its senses. Fang Yi received the medicine from the man and applied it on her own wounds. “Good Jiejie …” Wei Xiaobao said, his eyes blackened, ‘crash!’ with a loud cry he fell backward.

[CNProf]

Xiaobao the idiot. I'm on Shuang'er's side.

[smurf120]

not sure but might be in this one....I just searched from youtube...

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=-XHsm...eature=related

[smurf120]

I hate when he turns stupid for Fang Yi!!!!!!!!!!!!!

[SkyWalker]

Thanks for the update foxs. How's everything going for you for so far?

I hate when he turns stupid for Fang Yi!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Ditto that! And to neglect Shuang'er nonetheless. Never thought I would say this, but, stupid WXB!!!!

[KChill]

Thanks for the update foxs. How's everything going for you for so far?

Ditto that! And to neglect Shuang'er nonetheless. Never thought I would say this, but, stupid WXB!!!!

C'mon he met FY first, so she gets first dibs!!!

[crazee]

[I]Tweety, KChill, Sky, Crazee, who says women are the weaker conterparts of men? A

OOps did i say that ? No, No, woman are perceived to be weaker. they are stronger than men.... Like Xiao Yu Er.....said, the prettier the girl, the more dangerous....beware

I found out that too late. Would had remained bachelor if I had another chance
....don't let her know Ok ?

[athlonkmf]

Ditto that! And to neglect Shuang'er nonetheless. Never thought I would say this, but, stupid WXB!!!!

It gets so much worse later in the story.... At least he understand who's the best in the end.

[triketao]

Enough Lurking, Foxs you're a hero! Keep it up!

[foxs]

Sorry for the delay, I went out of town and did not bring my laptop. CNProf, Smurf, Sky, I can see that you are Shuang'er's fans. Go Shuang'er! KChill, Crazee, Athlon, seems like you guys know women very well. Triketao, welcome. I also read you comment in the 'appreciation' thread. I wish more people will be like you. Don't get me wrong, I am not doing it for the accolade, in fact, I was pleasantly surprised to find out there are many devout readers in this thread. I thought that since it is already translated, nobody would read it. But perhaps it is because this story is another popular saga by Jin Yong. Anyway, I saw there are several other stories going on. I do not have time to read yet, but I want to encourage you, the 'lurkers' out there, if you follow a translation (not only this one), please leave your comment to let the translators know you are reading it. Sky, thanks for asking. Hopefully I will have good news soon.

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When he woke up, he felt his lips were parched and his tongue dry, with a sharp pain on the pit of his stomach; he could not help but groaning loudly. He heard someone spoke, “Good, you’re awake!” Wei Xiaobao slowly opened his eyes, and saw someone with a bowl of medicine, which he held in front of Wei Xiaobao’s mouth. This medicine was exceptionally smelly, but without hesitation he drank it down. As it entered his mouth, it tasted strangely bitter. After he finished the medicine, he said, “Thank you Dashu, for saving my life. I … how is my Jiejie?”

“Fortunately we saved you in time,” the man replied, “If we arrived just a bit late, the two of you would have lost your lives. You are too daring, why did you come to this immortal island?”

Hearing Fang Yi was saved, Wei Xiaobao was greatly relieved, he did not stop expressing his gratitude. Only then did he realize that he was lying underneath a quilt, his entire clothes were gone, his legs were still numb. The man’s appearance was unsightly, his face was full of scars, but in Wei Xiaobao’s eyes, he looked like a Bodhisattva who saved his life. He let out a breath and said, “The sailors on the ship said that there are immortal fruits on this island, those who ate it will have long life and won’t grow old.”

“Hey,” the man laughed, “If there were indeed such immortal fruits, why didn’t they come to pick the fruits themselves?”

“Aiyo!” Wei Xiaobao exclaimed, “Those sailors harbor malicious intentions. I still have a companion on the ship, I am afraid ... I am afraid she might fall into those bad people's hands. Dashu, please think of a way to rescue her."

The ugly man said, "That ship has already left three days ago, how could I find it?"

Wei Xiaobao was puzzled; "Three days ago?" he asked in bewilderment.

The ugly man said, "You have been in coma for three whole days and nights, most likely you did not know it?"

Although Shuang'er's martial art skill was high, she was all alone on the boundless ocean, how could she escape the wicked men's evil scheme? Remembering her, Wei Xiaobao could not help but was very anxious. The ugly man comforted him, "Feeling anxious this moment is useless. You'd better take a good rest, the snakes on this island are not a small matter, you will need at least seven days of treatment before the venom can be eradicated." He asked Wei Xiaobao's name, and introduced himself as having a surname of Pan.

By the third day, Wei Xiaobao was able to get up and walk slowly by holding on to the wall. The ugly man surnamed Pan took him to see Fang Yi. Turned out she was being taken care of by another woman, but her jade countenance was wan and sallow, her spirit was weary. When the two of them met, they were both happy and grieved at the same time, and thus they embraced each other and cried together. Henceforth the two of them share the same room during the day. When talking about the fierceness of the vipers' venom, the hair on their bodies stood up.

By the sixth day, the man surnamed Pan said, "The physician of our island, Mr. Lu, has returned from his journey out to the sea, I have already invited him to examine Wei Xiongdi." Wei Xiaobao thanked him.

Not too long afterwards, a man in his forties walked in, he dressed as a scholar, his expression is friendly; he asked Wei Xiaobao how the snakes bit him. He said, "The residents of this island always have realgar snake medicine handy, when this medicine is applied on the vipers, the snakes will immediately run away, and will not dare to bite people."

"So that's how it is," Wei Xiaobao said, "No wonder Pan Dage and the others are not afraid."

Mr. Lu examined his wound, and took out six pills, he said, "You take three pills, and give the other three to your companion. Take one pill every day."

Wei Xiaobao thanked him profusely. He took out two hundred taels worth of banknotes. "A little bit of treatment fee," he said, "I ask Mister not to laugh."

Mr. Lu was startled; he said, "Why so much? Gongzi gives me two taels, and I am already grateful." Wei Xiaobao insisted on giving him the whole thing, Mr. Lu thanked him and accepted. He said with a laugh, "Gongzi is so generous, to refuse would be impolite. Perhaps Gongzi feels stifled staying here, what do you say tonight Gongzi and your female companion come to my humble home to have a cup of wine?" Wei Xiaobao was delighted and readily accepted the invitation.

That evening, Mr. Lu sent two sedan chairs to pick up Wei Xiaobao and Fang Yi. These bamboo sedan chairs were actually bamboo chairs with two bamboo poles attached on each side, carried by two men, one in the front and the other on the back. The residents of the island were simple and crude, they did not have real sedan chairs.

The two sedan chairs travelled along a mountain stream. The water of the creek gurgled, the vegetation was fresh and clean, they both felt completely relax. Only when they saw tall grass did Wei and Fang, two people, shuddered in apprehension, for fear that some vipers would come out of the grass. After traveling for seven, eight li, the sedan chairs arrived in front of a cluster of three bamboo buildings. The building's walls and roofs were made of coarse bamboo poles about the size of a bowl in diameter weaved together, it looked very firm and solid. Wei Xiaobao had never seen a bamboo construction like this in Jiangnan and Hebei [Translator's note: I am not sure about this. Jiangnan can also mean 'south of Yangtze', Hebei can also mean 'north of yellow river'.]

Mr. Lu went out to welcome them, and invited the two of them to enter. At the hall, a woman in her thirties came out to welcome the guests, she was Mr. Lu's wife. The woman pulled Fang Yi's hand; she appeared very friendly. Mr. Lu invited Wei Xiaobao to sit in his study room.

The bamboo bookshelf in the study room was full of books, the four walls were also full of hanging calligraphy and painting, apparently Mr. Lu was an elegant scholar. Mr. Lu said, "Zaixia is an uncouth resident of a barren island, extremely ill-informed and narrow-minded. Wei Gongzi came from a well-known scenic spot on the Central Plains, a younger generation of a noble family, your view must be broad, your appreciation must be exquisite. Please look at these several painting and calligraphy; in your opinion, will they be passable to enter your house?"

These several sentences were scholarly talk, Wei Xiaobao did not understand even half a sentence, but seeing he was pointing to the painting and calligraphy on the wall, he looked up and saw a scenery painting [orig. mountain and water], and another one with painting of red-crowned crane and a turtle. He laughed and said, "That old turtle looks very amusing."

Mr. Lu was slightly startled; he pointed to a scroll on the table and asked, "Wei Gongzi, what do you think of my Shigu script[5]?"

Wei Xiaobao saw the characters were curvy, just like the writing on a talisman. He nodded and said, "Good, very good!"

Mr. Lu pointed to another scroll of large brush-written characters; he said, "This painting is Qin Dynasty's stone engrave of Lang Ya [clean and white ivory] Platform, what does Wei Gongzi think about it?"

Wei Xiaobao thought that if he blindly agreed to everything, it would not be interesting, so he shook his head and said, "This calligraphy is not too good."

Mr. Lu felt a deep veneration as he said, "Would Wei Gongzi please give directions? Where is the faulty stroke and weak points of this calligraphy?"

"There are too many faulty strokes, there are too little superb strokes!" Wei Xiaobao said. He thought that since there are 'faulty stroke', then naturally there are 'superb stroke' as well.

It was the very first time that Mr. Lu heard the term 'superb stroke', he was taken aback and was at a loss momentarily.

"Brilliant, brilliant!" he said. Pointing to a grass script calligraphy on the western wall, he said, "This is wild grass script, what does Wei Gongzi think about it?"

Cocking his head, Wei Xiaobao looked at the painting for a moment, and then he shook his head and said, "These several characters are out of ink, you should rub some more ink stick. Um, this thread here is being dragged here and there, but you did not wipe it clean."

As soon as Mr. Lu heard this, his countenance changed greatly. Grass script pays particular attention to the application of dry and wet ink. When the brush is moist, the character is wet, when the brush is dried up, the character looks parched; dry and wet alternates, creating delicate shades of strokes. There is conspicuous wetness in the dry character, and contrasting dry stroke in the wet character, yin and yang complements each other, just like the red cloud obstructing the sky, the square makes a wonderful letter. As for the thread of strokes joined together, calligraphers call it 'transparent' lines; sometimes it joins several brush strokes together, sometimes it joins several letters together. Particular attention must be paid to both sides, the angles change irregularly, sometimes the brush floats, or turns abruptly to create all kinds of different look. By saying those words, Wei Xiaobao had revealed his background.

Mr. Lu pointed to another scroll of calligraphy and said, "This one is entirely oracle bone inscriptions, Xiongdi's knowledge is shallow, I don't even know a single character, would Wei Gongzi please give directions?"

Wei Xiaobao saw that all characters on the paper look like tadpoles, just like the characters engraved on the stone tablet in the Pu Ji Temple on Jinxiu Peak of Mount Wutai; his heart was moved, he said, "I know these several characters, it says 'Hong Jiaozhu of Shen Long Jiao will not be old for ten thousand years, he will enjoy the good fortune of the immortals forever, his magical power is extensive, his long-life is the same as the Heaven's'."

A delighted expression spread across Mr. Lu's face; he said, "Thank Heaven and thank the Earth, you indeed know these characters!"

Seeing his extreme delight, so much so that his voice was trembling, Wei Xiaobao's suspicion arose: "I only know several characters, why is he this happy? Could it be that he also belongs to Shen Long Jiao? Aiyo, not good! Snake ... snake ... spirit snake ... could it be that this is the Divine Dragon Island?" He blurted out, "Where is Fat Toutuo?"

Mr. Lu was shocked; he withdrew several steps and with a trembling voice said, "You ... you know it?"

Wei Xiaobao nodded. Actually, he did not know anything. Mr. Lu's expression became serious as he said, "Since you know it, then it's very good." Walking toward the desk, he ground some ink and said, "Please translate these tadpole scripts one by one. Which one is 'Hong' character, which one is 'Jiao' character?" Lifting the brush, he beckoned him to come over.

Asking Wei Xiaobao to take up a pen to write was more cruel than asking him to surrender his life. Wei Xiaobao groaned inwardly, but seeing Mr. Lu's unsightly expression, he did not dare to disobey. Bracing himself, he walked over to the desk and sat down. He took the pen and held it inside his fist. The way he hold the pen was thirty percent similar to holding chopsticks when he eat, but the way he clench his fist was also similar to the way people holding a knife to butcher a pig, or holding a hammer to pound the nail; how could there be such a way to hold the pen in the world?

Mr. Lu's angry look was growing, he struggled hard to control it. Slowly he said, "Write down your name first!"

Wei Xiaobao suddenly stood up and tossed the pen onto the floor, the ink splattered everywhere, he said in a loud voice, "Laozi does not know dog's fart, I can't write 'fart' character. All those 'Hong Jiaozhu's long-life is the same as the Heaven's', laozi was simply boasting unguardedly to swindle that bad toutuo. If you want laozi to write, wait for my next reincarnation. You want to kill me or chop me, if laozi even frown, just consider me not a real man."

Mr. Lu coldly said, "You don't know any character?"

"I don't," Wei Xiaobao replied, "I don't know the 'gui'' character from your turtle [wu gui] or the 'dan' character from your bast@rd [wang ba dan]." Since his trickery had been unmasked, his shame turned into anger. Besides, he was on Snake Island, there was only death for him without any chance to live. Begging for mercy was useless, he might as well took some advantage first.

Mr. Lu was silent for half a day. He picked up the brush and wrote several tadpole characters on the paper. "What characters are these?" he asked.

"F*ck your mother!" Wei Xiaobao said in loud voice, "I said I don't know, that means I don't know. Do you think I am lying?"

Mr. Lu nodded. "Very well," he said, "Turns out the Fat Toutuo has fallen into your big trick. But this matter has been reported to Jiaozhu. Little thief!" Suddenly he pounced and wrapped his fingers around Wei Xiaobao’s neck, his hands squeezed tighter and tighter. With a clenched teeth he said, “You have made us cheating Jiaozhu, everybody will die without a burial site because of you. It would be better if we will all die together to avoid those endless, ruthless punishment.”

Strangled by him, Wei Xiaobao could not breathe, his face swollen purple, his tongue stuck out. If Mr. Lu added a little bit more force into his hands, this child would take his last breath and die. Thinking that he had an enormous responsibility in this matter, he was startled and immediately released his fingers. Pushing with both hands, he sent Wei Xiaobao tumbling to the floor, and then filled with hatred, he left the room.

After quite a long time, Wei Xiaobao was finally able to get up. “Dead turtle, f*ck his thief mother,” perhaps he uttered these curses several hundred times, while thinking that since he was on this poisonous Snake Island, there was no other place he could escape to. If he ran toward the underbrush in the woods, he would die even faster. Walking toward the door, he pushed the door only to find that the bamboo door was barred from the outside. Looking out of the window, he saw a deep valley. Indeed there was no way out. Turning his head around, he saw the calligraphy and painting hanging on the wall. “What’s so good about these fart characters and fart drawings?” he mused. Picking up the brush, he dipped it into the ink, and drew countless ‘big turtles’ and ‘little turtles’ on each scroll of calligraphy and paintings.

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[5] Lit. stone drum, early form of Chinese characters inscribed in stone, from spring and autumn period.

[tweety365]

Thanks foxs!

WXB is so naughty. Already at death's door, but still causing trouble. Mr. Lu won't appreciate all those turtles on his scrolls