The Deer and The Cauldron - Unabridged Thread

[foxs]

Chapter 17 - Violently knocking on Buddhism’s gate is not easy, reopening the net of doubt with an example.
(Translated by Foxs)

LuDingJi-17.jpg

Wei Xiaobao handed over the gift one by one, while attentively looking at each monk’s face. But after he finished handing over more than fifty sets of gifts, he could not find even a single monk with one or two part resemblance to the young emperor.

[foxs]

Suddenly a beam of light appeared some distance away, coming slowly toward the room. Wei Xiaobao was greatly alarmed, “Ghost light, ghost light!” he said in his heart. The light was coming closer and closer, turned out it was a lantern, carried by a female ghost wearing white clothing. Wei Xiaobao hastily closed his eyes. He heard the intermittent sound of footsteps, which stopped right in front of him.

He was so scared that he did not dare to breathe, his whole body trembled, but he heard a young girl’s voice laughing. “Why are you closing your eyes?” she asked. Her voice was gentle, soft and pleasant to the ears.

“Don’t scare me,” Wei Xiaobao said, “I … I don’t dare to look at you.”

The female ghost laughed and said, “You are afraid blood coming out of my seven orifices and my tongue stretched out, aren’t you? Why don’t you take a quick look?”

With a trembling voice Wei Xiaobao said, “I won’t fall into your trick. You have your hair disheveled and blood coming out of my seven orifices. What … what’s so good to look at?”

The female ghost giggled; she blew a puff of air onto his face. As the air arrived on his face, Wei Xiaobao felt it was warm, and carried a faint smell of delicate fragrance. Wei Xiaobao opened his left eye a slit, he vaguely saw a snow white face, with curved eyebrows and small mouth, her dimpled face looked like flower. Immediately he opened both eyes wide, and now he could see an extremely delicate and pretty young girl’s face, approximately thirteen, fourteen years of age; her hair was tied into a pair of buns on top of her head, she was grinning as she looked at him. Wei Xiaobao’s heart was greatly comforted, “You really are not a ghost?” he asked.

The young girl smiled and said, “Of course I am a ghost, I am a hangman ghost.” [ghost from someone who died of hanging; is there any English term for it?]

Wei Xiaobao’s heart jumped; he was startled and at a loss. The young girl said with a laugh, “How could you boldly kill evil man, but is so timid in front of a hangman ghost?”

Wei Xiaobao let out a breath and said, “I am not afraid of people, I am afraid of ghosts.”

The young girl giggled again and asked, “Which of your acupoint is sealed?”

“I wish I knew,” Wei Xiaobao replied. The young girl massaged the back of his shoulder, she also slapped his back lightly three times. Immediately Wei Xiaobao was able to move his hands. He raised his arms and waved them twice; he laughed and said, "You know how to unseal the acupoint; that's wonderful!"

The young girl said, "I learned it not too long ago, today is the first time I've tried it on you."

She then proceeded by massaging his underarm and waist for a moment. Wei Xiaobao sprang up and said with a laugh, "Stop it, stop it! I am ticklish." In this way, the acupoints on his legs were unsealed. He stretched out his hands and said with a laugh, "You tickled me, now I must tickle you back." While saying that, he took a step forward.

The young girl stuck out her tongue and made a face. But she her supposedly ugly face looked extremely cute and did not look frightening at all. Wei Xiaobao reached out trying to pinch her tongue. The young girl turned her head to evade; she giggled tenderly and said, "Now you are not afraid of hangman ghost?"

"You have a shadow," Wei Xiaobao said, "Your body is warm, you are a human, not a ghost."

The young girl opened her eyes wide; she grimly said, "I am a zombie, not a ghost!"

Wei Xiaobao was startled. Under the lantern light he could see her pinkish complexion; he laughed and said, "Zombies cannot bend their legs, they can't talk either."

The young girl laughed again and said, "In that case, I am a fox-spirit."

Wei Xiaobao laughed, "I am not afraid of fox-spirit," he said. But inwardly he was somewhat suspicious, "Could she be really a fox-spirit?" Walking around her, he looked at her back.

The young girl laughed and said, "I am a thousand-year fox-spirit, my magical skill is very deep, I don't have a tail."

Wei Xiaobao said, "To such a good-looking fox-spirit like you, I don't mind if you bewitch me that I die."

The young girl blushed slightly; she put a finger on her face to shame him, saying, "You are shameless. Just a moment ago you were so afraid of ghosts, and now you are taking advantage of me."

Wei Xiaobao was afraid of, number one: zombie, number two: ghost. As for the fox-spirit, he was not particularly afraid. He saw that this young girl was affable, compared to Fang Yi and Mu Jianping, she was considerably friendlier. Much less she spoke with Jiangnan accent, which was a lot more pleasant to the ear than Fang and Mu, two girls' Yunnan accent. "Miss," he said with a laugh, "What is your name?"

"I am Shuang'er," the young girl replied, "Shuang from 'yi shuang' [a pair]."

Wei Xiaobao laughed, "That's very good," he said, "I wonder if you are a pair of fragrant shoes, or a pair of smelly socks."

Shuang'er laughed and said, "A pair of smelly socks is good, a pair of fragrant shoes is also good; you decide. Gui Gong-gong, you are dripping wet, surely it is very uncomfortable, please come over there and change into dry clothes. It's just that there is a problem, you must not blame me."

"What problem?" Wei Xiaobao asked.

"We do not have any men's clothes in here," Shuang'er replied.

Wei Xiaobao's heart jumped, immediately his countenance changed, "This house is full of female ghosts," he mused.

Shuang'er raised the lantern and said, "Please come this way." Wei Xiaobao hesitated, he did not know what to do. Shuang'er was already at the door; she turned her head around to wait for him. With a smile she said, "Putting on women's clothes, you are afraid it will be inauspicious, aren't you? Let's do it this way then: you stay on the bed, I'll get hot iron to dry your clothes."

Seeing her gentle and soft expression, and how she was being very considerate, Wei Xiaobao found it hard to refuse; he had no choice but to follow her out the door. "What happened to my companions?" he asked, "Where are they going?"

Shuang'er halted while he walked two more steps, and then walking side by side with him, she said in low voice, "Third Mistress' [orig. 'san shao nai' - third young madame] order: I must not tell you anything. Wait until you have had some refreshments, then Third Mistress herself will tell you everything." Wei Xiaobao had been very hungry for a long time, hearing that he was going to get some refreshment, his spirit was aroused considerably.

Shuang'er took Wei Xiaobao along a pitch-black corridor into a dark room. She lighted the candle on the table. The room only had a bed and a table, the furnishing was simple, but it was very clean. The bed was covered in cotton quilt. Shuang'er lifted a corner of the quilt and let down the mosquito net, saying, "Gui Xianggong [lord/master/young gentleman, etc.], take off your clothes on the bed and tossed it to me."

Following her instruction, Wei Xiaobao jumped onto the bed, removed all his clothes and crawled underneath the quilt before tossing the clothes outside the net. Shuang'er caught the clothes, walked toward the door, and said, "I'll get the refreshment. Do you prefer sweet zongzi[1], or salty zongzi?"

"My stomach is growling of hunger," Wei Xiaobao replied, "Even if you give me mud zongzi, I'll eat three." Shuang'er laughed and walked out.

As soon as she left, Wei Xiaobao felt the room was extremely quiet. Looking at the flickering candle, sometimes it brightened, sometimes it dimmed, his fear returned. "Aiyo, not good," he mused, "When female ghosts invite people to eat noodles, eat wonton, they actually serve earthworm and caterpillar. I must not be fooled."

After a while, Wei Xiaobao smelled the sweet fragrance of meat and sugar. Shuang'er was back with a wooden tray on her hands, she used her elbow to push the mosquito net aside. Wei Xiaobao saw four already unwrapped zongzi on a plate, and was delighted. In all honesty, he was very hungry so that even if the zongzi was stuffed with earthworm and caterpillar, he would eat it first and talk about it later. Therefore, he picked the chopsticks and started to eat. When the zongzi entered his mouth, it tasted sweet and incomparably tasty. After two bites, he said, "Shuang'er, this tastes like Huzhou's zongzi, it's really good."

Zongzi produced by Huzhou prefecture of Zhejiang province has soft rice and tasty meat-stuffing; it was unparalleled in the world. Yangzhou had a Huzhou zongzi shop. The patrons of Lovely Spring Courtyard often sent Wei Xiaobao to buy some. The zongzi was wrapped using bamboo leaves, so it was difficult for Wei Xiaobao to steal, but he always managed to squeeze some rice out of the corner of the zongzi and had a taste. Ever since he arrived at the north, he could not find Huzhou's zongzi any longer.

Shuang'er was amazed; she said, "You are very knowledgeable, you can tell by eating it that it is Huzhou's zongzi."

Wei Xiaobao was busy chewing as he mumbled, "So this is really Huzhou's zongzi? How can you buy Huzhou's zongzi in this place?"

Shuang'er laughed and said, "We did not buy it, it's from fox-spirit ... (tee hee) fox-spirit magic."

"Fox-spirit magical power is extensive," Wei Xiaobao praised. Suddenly Zhang Laosan and his men came to his mind, thereupon he added, "It's long-life is the same as the Heaven's!"

Shuang'er laughed. "Enjoy your meal; I'll iron your clothes." After only taking a step, she asked, "Are you still afraid?"

Wei Xiaobao's fear had diminished for the most part, but when all is said and done, he was still somewhat scared; he said, "Come back quickly."

"Yes!" Shuang'er promised.

Not too long afterwards, Wei Xiaobao heard 'chi chi' noise. Shuang'er was back carrying an iron with glowing red coal in it. She spread his clothes on the table, so that while ironing, she could keep him company.

Of the four zongzi, two were savory, two were sweet. Wei Xiaobao ate three, and he could not eat anymore. He said, "These zongzi are very good. Did you wrap them yourself?"

"Third Mistress seasoned and mixed the ingredients, I helped her wrapping them," Shuang'er replied.

Hearing she spoke with a Jiangnan accent, Wei Xiaobao's heart was moved. "Are you from Huzhou?" he asked.

Shuang'er hesitated and did not answer. "When the clothes are ironed," she said, "And Gui Xianggong see the Third Mistress later, you can ask her yourself, all right?" She was speaking soft and gentle words, her manner was very respectful.

"Alright," Wei Xiaobao said, "What's there not all right?" He lifted the mosquito net to look at her ironing his clothes.

Shuang'er looked up and smiled at him, she said, "You are not wearing any clothes, you may catch cold."

Suddenly Wei Xiaobao's mischievousness arose; he raised his body and called out, "I am going to jump out without any clothes on, I can't possibly catch cold." Shuang'er was shocked, but then she saw he slid down and hid underneath the quilt that even his head was not visible; she could not help but giggle.

About the time needed to eat a bowl of rice later, Shuang'er handed the ironed clothes over to the bed. Wei Xiaobao put it on and climbed down of the bed. Shuang'er helped him buttoned the jacket. She took out a small wooden comb to comb his hair and plait a braid. Wei Xiaobao smelled the light delicate fragrance coming from her body; he was very happy. "Turns out fox-spirits are such nice people."

Shuang'er pouted and said with a laugh, "What fox-spirit? It's so unpleasant to hear. I am not a fox-spirit."

"Ah, I know," Wei Xiaobao exclaimed, "You are a great immortal; I must not call you fox-spirit."

Shuang'er laughed and said, "I am not a great immortal either, I am just a little servant girl."

"I am a little eunuch, and you are a little servant," Wei Xiaobao said, "Both of us are serving other people, we are a couple."

"You are serving the Emperor," Shuang'er said, "How can do I compare to you? One in the sky, the other on the earth." While chatting, the braid was finished.

Shuang'er said, "I can't plait men's braids, I don't know if this is alright?"

Wei Xiaobao pulled the braid to the front and had a look. "Very good," he said, "I hate plaiting braids the most. It would be good if you could help me plaid my braid every day."

"I may not have that good fortune," Shuang'er said, "You are a big hero. Today I can plait your braid, it can already be considered that in the previous incarnation I have cultivated enough virtue."

"Aiyo," Wei Xiaobao said, "No formalities, please. You are such a smart and beautiful woman, and you plaited my braid. It was me who in my previous incarnation has knocked seventeen, eighteen big wooden fish[2]."

Shuang'er's face blushed; she said in low voice, "I am speaking sincerely, yet you are making fun of me."

"I am not, I am not," Wei Xiaobao said, "I am also speaking sincerely."

Shuang'er smiled and said, "The Third Mistress says that whenever Gui Xianggong wishes, you may go and sit in the rear hall."

"Very well," Wei Xiaobao said, "Your Third (Young) Master is not home?"

"Um," Shuang'er hesitated, "He passed away," she said quietly. Remembering the many mourning halls in the house, Wei Xiaobao's heart trembled; he did not dare to ask anymore question.

Following behind her, they arrived at a tiny fancy-looking reception room at the rear hall. He sat down, Shuang'er immediately served a cup of hot tea. Wei Xiaobao's heart was beating fast, he did not dare to chat with her again.

A moment later, he heard light and slow footsteps, from behind the wooden partition a young madame appeared, her entire body was covered in white-silk mourning dress. "Gui Xianggong must have had an exhausting journey," she said. While saying that she bowed deeply, her manner was very respectful.

Wei Xiaobao hastily returned the propriety and said, "I do not dare."

"Gui Xianggong, please sit down," the young madame said.

Wei Xiaobao noticed that the young madame was about twenty six, twenty seven years of age, she was not wearing any cosmetics, her complexion pale, her eyes were red, obviously she had just been crying. Under the lantern light unexpectedly he saw that she had a shadow; although she looked gloomy and grim, most probably she was not a ghost. In his heart, however, he was still apprehensive. "Yes, yes!" he replied. He sat down, leaning his body forward and said, "Third Mistress, thank you very much for your Huzhou's zongzi, they are really delicious."

The young madame said, "My deceased husband was surnamed Zhuang, I do not dare to be addressed as the Third Mistress. How long has Gui Xianggong been in the Palace?"

---

[1] rice dumplings wrapped in leaves

[2] Referring to wooden fish used by Buddhist in prayers.

[foxs]

Wei Xiaobao thought, "In the dark a moment ago, there was a woman asking me if I killed Oboi. After I admitted that I killed him, they sent a servant girl to deliver zongzi for me to eat. Apparently I was betting my treasure correctly." He replied, "Not a lot more than a year."

Madame Zhuang said, "Could Gui Xianggong tell Xiao Nuzi[1] how you kill that traitor Oboi with your own hand?"

Hearing she was calling Oboi a 'traitor', Wei Xiaobao was even more relieved, it was as if he had obtained a pair of very valuable cards in his hands, no matter of what value were the other two cards, when the cards were played, he would only make a kill and not pay for a loss, at most he would be even with the opponent. Thereupon he started by how Kangxi had issued an order for Oboi's capture, how Oboi resisted arrest, how the little eunuchs swarmed on him, but several of them were killed by Oboi, how he had used the ashes of the incense burner to blind him so that finally Oboi was captured. Only about Kangxi stabbing Oboi on the back, he changed it into catching Oboi by surprise, he himself ferociously stabbed him on the back.

Madame Zhuang did not utter a single word, she was listening attentively in silence. When Wei Xiaobao narrated how he blinded Oboi by scattering ashes from the incense burner, how he stabbed him on his back using a dagger, how he smashed his head using the copper incense burner and thus capturing him, she could not help but letting out a breath gently.

Wei Xiaobao was accustomed to listen to the storyteller performing their art; he knew where to pause and where to raise his voice, his technique in grasping the audience’s heart was just perfect. Moreover, it was his own personal experience, he knew all kinds of the minute details so that his narration was exhaustive. Plus he added some grease, salt, paste and vinegar, so that perhaps listening to his story was several degrees more soul-stirring than when he was actually capturing Oboi.

“So that’s what happened,” Madame Zhuang said, “The rumor outside is highly exaggerated, they say that Gui Gonggong has such an excellent martial art, that he fiercely fought Oboi for three hundred rounds, and that he used his unique skill to subdue him. Thinking that Oboi had the reputation as the Manchurian’s Number One Warrior, Gui Xianggong must have had very high martial art skill, while his age is still very young.”

Wei Xiaobao laughed and said, “If we fought for real, even a hundred Xiao Guizi are not this traitor’s match.”

“Afterwards, how did Oboi die?” Madame Zhuang asked.

Wei Xiaobao thought, “Eight or nine out of ten, this Third Mistress is not a female ghost; therefore, she must be a Wulin character. If I don’t need to lie, I should not tell a lie, so that after painstakingly win some money, I won’t lose it all in one turn of the cards.” Thereupon he truthfully told her in details how Kangxi sent him to inspect Oboi’s condition, how he came across Tian Di Hui people who came to attack the Prince Kang’s mansion, how the incoming people mistakenly identified him as Oboi’s man, how he struggled to crawl into the prison cell and thus killed Oboi. At the very last he said, “It turned out that these people were Oboi’s adversary; they were the heroes and warriors of the Green Wood Hall of Tian Di Hui. Seeing I killed Oboi, unexpectedly they were very polite to me, telling me that I have avenged their great enmity.”

Madame Zhuang nodded; she said, “And thus Gui Xianggong received the favor of Chen Zongduozhu who took you as his disciple and made you the Tian Di Hui’s Green Wood Hall Xiangzhu. Turns out everything is because of this.”

Wei Xiaobao thought, “You already knew everything, why did you ask me, then?” He said, “I am a muddle head, I don’t know anything. Being the Green Wood Hall Xiangzhu, indeed I only have a name but no reality.” He did not know whether Madame Zhuang was a friend or a foe of Tian Di Hui, therefore, he decided to hold two contradictory views at the same time first and talk about it later.

Madame Zhuang pondered deeply for half a day before saying, “When Gui Xianggong killed Oboi in that prison cell, which move did you use? Is it possible for you to show it to me?”

Seeing her eyes were shining bright, Wei Xiaobao thought, “This woman must belong to some demonic school; if I talk nonsense and toot my horn, most probably she would expose my trickery. I think being honest is the best.” Thereupon he stood up and said, “What fart move do I have?” Flailing his hands around he said, “At that time I was so scared out of my wits, I was in a hideous mess; this is exactly what I did.”

Madame Zhuang nodded. “Gui Xianggong, please sit down,” she said. And then she stood up and turned to Shuang’er, “Shuang’er, why don’t you take our osmanthus flower flavored candy and have Gui Xianggong taste it?” Finished speaking, she bowed in respect again and walked out toward the inner hall.

Wei Xiaobao thought, “She invites me to eat some candy, obviously she does not harbor any evil intention.” But in the end he still did not feel at ease; he thought, “Although this Third Mistress does not look like a female ghost, it is perhaps because her magical skill is so high that the demonic air did not show.”

Shuang’er returned from the inner hall, holding a blue and white china plate with tall legs with both hands, the plate was full of osmanthus flower flavored candy and pine-nut candy. She smiled and said, “Gui Xianggong, please eat some candy.” After setting the china plate on the table, she went back into the inner hall.

Sitting in that reception room, Wei Xiaobao ate quite a lot of osmanthus flower flavored candies and pine-nut candies, hoping that it would be dawn quickly.

After quite a while, suddenly he heard the rustling noise of clothes. Behind the door, by the window, behind the partition screen, there were a lot of eyes secretly stealing a glance at him; it appeared that all those eyes belong to women. In the dark night, it was difficult to tell whether they were humans or ghosts, it’s just that by looking at those eyes, Wei Xiaobao’s heart was really afraid. Suddenly he heard an old woman’s voice from outside the long window said, “Gui Xianggong, you have killed the traitor Oboi, and have avenged the blood enmity as-deep-as-the-ocean of our families. We do not know how to repay this great virtue and great kindness.” The long window opened, revealing several dozens of women wearing white clothing lining up on the floor to pay homage to him.

Wei Xiaobao was startled; he quickly returned the courtesy. Hearing the women were knocking their heads on the floor, ‘dong, dong, dong’, he also kneeled down and kowtowed. The long window suddenly closed. The old woman said, “Benefactor does not need to be overly courteous, we, widows, do not dare to accept the honor.” Suddenly the women outside the long window raised their voices in sobbing and weeping.

Wei Xiaobao was absolutely terrified. After a while, the sound of weeping gradually went away, those women had dispersed. It was as if he was in a dream, or it happened only in his imagination. “Actually, are they humans, or are they ghosts? It looks like … it looks like …”

A moment later, Madame Zhuang returned from the inner hall. “Gui Xianggong,” she said, “Please do not be disturbed. Those who live here are all surviving family of the deceased loyal ministers and patriots who were harmed by Oboi. When we found out that Gui Xianggong has killed Oboi with your own hand, and thus avenging our great enmity, we all feel grateful.”

“So Third Master was … was also harmed by Oboi?” Wei Xiaobao said.

Lowering her head, Madame Zhuang said, “Precisely. Everybody in here is grieving and crying blood, day and night we are waiting for an opportunity to revenge. Who would have thought this traitor, who was strung through and filled with evil, faced the retribution that quickly, unexpectedly he died under Gui Xianggong’s hands.”

“What merit do I have?” Wei Xiaobao said, “It was only a coincident; nothing more than that.”

Shuang’er appeared with his own bundle and placed it on the table. Madame Zhuang said, “Gui Xianggong, your great virtue and great kindness is difficult to repay, by right we should receive you cordially, it’s only proper. Only, living as widows, we feel it is rather inappropriate. After careful discussion, we wanted to present you a meager gift to show our appreciation. But Gui Xianggong’s traveling bag is plentiful, you carry a huge sum of money. We live in the countryside, what do we have that Gui Xianggong may appreciate? As for martial art skill and so on, Gui Xianggong is Tian Di Hui’s Chen Zongduozhu’s disciple; your school’s martial art is far above our little superficial skill. It truly poses difficulties for us.”

Hearing her speaking so courteously, Wei Xiaobao said, “There is no need to stand on ceremonies. I just want to ask, those several companions of mine, where did they go?”

Madame Zhuang contemplated for half a day, and said, “Since you ask, I should have not dared not to answer. But after Benefactor learns about it, I am afraid it would only bring harm and not benefit. These several people are Benefactor’s friends, we will strive to do our best not to let them come into any harm. Someday they may see Benefactor again.”

Wei Xiaobao expected that asking further would be useless. He looked up toward the window and thought, “Why isn’t it daylight already?”

Madame Zhuang seemingly understood his thought; she asked, “Where is Benefactor going tomorrow?”

Wei Xiaobao thought, “I believe she has heard my conversation with that Zhang Laosan, it will be useless to conceal it from her.” He said, “I am going to Mount Wutai in Shanxi.”

Madame Zhuang said, “In this journey to Mount Wutai, you will have to travel far away; I am afraid you will meet some disturbances along the way. We are thinking of presenting you with a gift, we would ask that you give us the good fortune of not declining it.”

Wei Xiaobao laughed, “Other people have the good intention of giving me anything, I have never refused to accept it,” he said.

“That’s wonderful,” Madame Zhuang said. Pointing toward Shuang’er she said, “This little girl Shuang’er has followed me for many years, the way she is doing her job is fairly appropriate. We are presenting her to Benefactor, please take her with you. Hereafter she will attend to Benefactor.”

Wei Xiaobao was startled, but delighted; he did not expect that the gift she was going to present to him was a person. Just now Shuang’er had taken care of him, ironing his clothes and plaited his braid, she had saved him not a few efforts. If he could have this kind of good-looking and smart servant girl[2] accompanying him by his side, certainly it would be merrier; but the journey to Mount Wutai this time would not be necessarily peaceful or without any trouble, he must act according to the situation, taking a servant girl along would be very inconvenient. He said, “Madame Zhuang is giving me this valuable present, I am really grateful. It’s just that … it’s just that …” He wanted to decline, but first, others were giving him present, how could he not accept? Second, such a nice servant, he really did not want not to accept her. He saw Shuang’er, with her head hung low, was stealing a glance to him; as soon as their eyes met, she hastily turned her head around, her face blushed.

“I wonder what Benefactor’s difficulty is?” Madame Zhuang asked.

Wei Xiaobao said, “I am going to Mount Wutai on a mission, most likely it will … it will not be easy; if I take this Miss along, I am afraid it will be inconvenient.”

“You don’t have to worry actually,” Madame Zhuang said, “Although Shuang’er is young, she is rather agile, she won’t be Benefactor’s burden. Please set your heart at ease.”

Wei Xiaobao took another glance toward Shuang’er, he saw her glazed eyes had an earnest look; he laughed and asked, “Shuang’er, are you willing to come with me?”

Shuang’er lowered her head, in a quiet voice she said, “Third Mistress ordered me to take care of Xianggong, naturally … naturally I must obey Third Mistress’ instruction.”

“Are you yourself willing or not?” Wei Xiaobao asked, “I am afraid we will meet dangers.”

“I am not afraid of dangers,” Shuang’er replied.

Wei Xiaobao smiled and said, “You answered my second question, but did not answer my first. You are not afraid of dangers, it’s just that Madame is presenting you to me, but in your heart you are not willing.”

Shuang’er said, “Madame’s benevolence to me is very heavy, Xianggong has shown great kindness to our Zhuang family, Madame instructs me to attend Xianggong, I will definitely do it with all my heart. If Xianggong treats me well, my fate is good, if you do not treat me well, it’s my … my destiny to suffer hardship.”

Wei Xiaobao laughed aloud and said, “Your fate is very good, how can you be destined to suffer hardship?” The corner of Shuang’er’s mouth revealed a light smile.

“Shuang’er,” Madame Zhuang said, “You pay respect to Gui Xianggong; later on, you will become Gui Xianggong’s.”

Shuang’er looked up; suddenly her eyes turned red. First she kneeled in front of Madame Zhuang and kowtowed, saying, “Third Mistress, I … I …” After saying the word ‘I’ twice, she broke into a light sob.

Madame Zhuang gently stroked her hair, in a warm voice she said, “Gui Xianggong is a young hero. He is still young, yet his name has spread all over the world. You must serve Xianggong well. He has promised to treat you well.”

“Yes,” Shuang’er replied. She turned around, and then gracefully paid her respect to Wei Xiaobao.

“No formalities, please!” Wei Xiaobao said. He helped her up, opened his bundle, took out a strand of pearls and said with a laugh, “Just consider this as my gift on the first meeting!” while thinking, “This strand of pearls at least worth three, four thousand taels of silver. If used to buy servant girls, it can buy several dozens of them. But several dozens of servant girls added together won’t be more lovely than this Shuang’er.”

Shuang’er received the gift with both hands, saying, “Many thanks Xianggong,” and hanged it on her neck. The pearls flickered under the light, it shined on her smart face, making her look even more beautiful.

Madame Zhuang said, “Benefactor is going to Mount Wutai, I wonder if you are going to investigate openly, or make secret inquiries?”

“Naturally I will make secret inquiries,” Wei Xiaobao replied.

Madame Zhuang said, “The various Buddhist monasteries and temples on Mount Wutai are separated into green and yellow, they are full of crouching tigers and hidden dragons. Benefactor must be very careful.”

“Yes,” Wei Xiaobao replied, “Thank you very much for your advice. But your calling me ‘Benefactor’, I do not dare to accept. Just call me Xiaobao.”

“I do not dare,” Madame Zhuang said. Standing up, she said, “Please take good care of yourself along the way, forgive this widow for not sending you far off.” To Shuang’er she said, “Shuang’er, as soon as you leave this door, you don’t belong to Zhuang family anymore. Hereafter whatever you say, whatever you do, will not be your former master’s concern. If you fool around outside, our Zhuang family will not shelter you anymore.” While saying these words, her expression was very serious. Shuang’er complied. Madame Zhuang saluted Wei Xiaobao again, and then walked in.

They saw the window paper turned translucent, the sky gradually brightened. Shuang’er went in to get her bundle, and then along with Wei Xiaobao’s bundle, she slung both bundles over her shoulder. “Let’s go!” Wei Xiaobao said.

“Yes!” Shuang’er replied. Her head hung low, her expression mournful, she kept looking back toward the hall. Apparently she was rather reluctant to part with Madame Zhuang. Her eyes were red, obviously she had just been crying.

Wei Xiaobao went out the front gate, Shuang’er followed behind him. By this time the heavy rain had stopped, but in the mountain streams, water was flowing rapidly, they could hear the sound of water everywhere. After walking for several dozen steps, Wei Xiaobao looked back toward the big house, but the mist had shrouded the front corner of the wall. After walking for several more dozen steps, he looked back again only to see white expanse of mist, nothing else was visible.

He sighed and said, “The matter of last night was really like a dream. Shuang’er, what did the Madame mean when she said those last sentences to you?”

---

[1] Lit. little woman/female. This is the counterpart of Xiaoren (humble/little one), i.e. she was placing herself in a lower position compared to the person she was talking to.

[2] The word ‘xiao yatou’ means a girl or a servant girl (used deprecatingly, but sometimes also as a term of endearment).

[foxs]

Shuang’er said, “The Third Mistress said that later on I am serving Xianggong; no matter what I say or do, it won’t be the responsibility of her Zhuang family.”

“In that case,” Wei Xiaobao said, “You can tell me where did my companions go?”

Shuang’er was startled. “Yes,” she said, “Xianggong’s companions were originally saved by us, Zhang Laosan and his men were also originally captured by us. But afterward some formidable characters from Shen Long Jiao arrived and those prisoners were snatched away. Third Mistress said that we are womenfolk, it was inappropriate for us to fight with those uncouth men. Besides, we may not necessarily be able to overcome those men. For the time being, we submit to them while looking for another way to rescue your several companions. Seeing we retreated, Shen Long Jiao people also withdrew. Before leaving, they spoke several polite words.” Wei Xiaobao nodded; he was rather concerned over Fang Yi and Mu Jianping’s safety.

Shuang’er said, “Third Mistress has persuaded the Shen Long Jiao leader that they must not harm your several companions’ lives. The man has agreed to it with his own mouth.”

Wei Xiaobao sighed and said, “I am afraid those Shen Long Jiao fellows speak just like they fart. Ay, I guess it can’t be helped.” He then asked, “Does the Third Mistress know martial art?”

“She does,” Shuang’er said, “Not only she knows martial art, she is very good at it.”

Wei Xiaobao shook his head and said, “She is such a horn-tooter, what ‘very good at martial art’? If she is really good at martial art, how could she let Oboi killed the Third Master?”

Shuang’er said, “When the Old Master and the Third Master were executed, none of their several dozen family members knew martial art. All the men in the family were arrested by Oboi and taken to Beijing to be executed, the women were to be banished to Guta district of Liaoning, to be slaves to the armored troops. Fortunately along the way they met the saving star, who killed the prisoner escorts and saved our several dozen women, helped us settled in here, and taught the Third Mistress and the others some skill.” Wei Xiaobao gradually understood.

In the meantime, the sky had brightened considerably, the sun had appeared on the eastern horizon. The heavy rain last night had washed the trees of the forest that everything looked fresh and green, with droplets of water hanging from their leaves. It was only now that Wei Xiaobao no longer doubted that the ones he saw last night were not female ghosts. He asked, “You have so many mourning halls in your house; are those all for your Masters and Young Masters who were killed by Oboi?”

“Exactly,” Shuang’er said, “We live in seclusion deep in the mountains, we have never had any dealings with outsiders before. The neighboring country people are curious and come over to stick their heads out and look around, so we always masquerade ourselves as ghosts to scare them off. Therefore, everybody says this is a haunted house. Over the last year, nobody has ever dared to come over. Unexpectedly Xianggong came last night. Third Mistress said that now that our great enmity has been avenged, it would be best if everything is kept in secret. The names of Master, Young Master and the others are written on memorial tablets in the mourning hall, if outsiders saw it, it would be greatly inconvenient. When Xianggong asked me last night, I did not dare to explain. But Third Mistress has said that henceforth I am to serve Xianggong, and no longer the Zhuang family’s responsibility. Naturally I must not conceal anything from you anymore.”

“That’s right,” Wei Xiaobao delightedly said, “Let me tell you: my real name is Wei Xiaobao. That Gui Gong-gong or what have you, is a fake name. You belong to the Wei family, not the Gui family.”

Shuang’er was overjoyed; she said, “Xianggong even tell me your real name, I can’t possibly reveal it to anybody else.”

Wei Xiaobao laughed. “My real name is not such a big secret,” he said, “Many of Tian Di Hui brethrens already know about it.”

Shuang’er said, “When those Shen Long Jiao people fought with your companions, Third Mistress and the others were outside, enjoying watching the fun. They saw those people were able to chant spells, reciting mumbo-jumbo incantation …”

Wei Xiaobao laughed and said, “Hong Jiaozhu’s magical power is extensive, his long-life is the same as the Heaven's. This kind of incantation, I am also able to recite.”

Shuang’er said, “Third Mistress said that while their mouths were chanting the incantations, there must be some other magic going on in the dark; otherwise, it’s impossible that as soon as they recite the spell, their power increased several folds. Afterwards, when that Zhang Laosan was talking to you, Third Mistress was listening outside, while the rest of us extinguished the light in the main hall and caught everybody using fishing net.”

Wei Xiaobao slapped his thigh and exclaimed, “Wonderful! Catching people using fishing net? That’s great!”

Shuang’er said, “Third Mistress said that there is nothing special about that Zhang Laosan’s martial art skill, only his sorcery is formidable, thereupon she did not fight him face to face. As soon as she managed to lure him out, she extinguished the light and with the fishing net …”

“Caught the old turtle,” Wei Xiaobao finished.

Shuang’er giggled. She said, “There is a lake behind the mountain, we often went fishing at night. When we were in Huzhou, the big house of the Zhuang family was located near Taihu[1]. The lake is very big, at that time our Zhuang family owned a lot of fishing boat, which we rented to the fishermen to catch fish. Third Mistress and the others learned how to use net to catch fish from watching the fishermen.”

“You really are Huzhou people, no wonder your Huzhou’s zongzi is really delicious,” Wei Xiaobao said, “How did the Third Master get killed by Oboi?”

“According to the Third Mistress,” Shuang’er said, “It was called ‘literary inquisition’.”

“Mosquito meat[2]?” Wei Xiaobao was puzzled, “Mosquito has meat?”

“Not ‘mosquito’, it’s ‘literary’,” Shuang’er said, "Learn to write! Our First Young Master was a scholar, his knowledge was very profound. After he'd gone blind, he wrote a book, in his book there was a sentence scolding the Manchu people ..."

"Tsk, tsk, tsk," Wei Xiaobao clucked his tongue, "Amazing, he was blind yet was able to write a literary work. My eyes are not blind, yet when looking at other people's writing, I still do not know anything. This might be called 'bright-eyed blind person'!"

Shuang'er said, "Old Mistress often said that we live in a wrong era, being illiterate is actually better. The women who live together in our house are from several different families, each family's Laoye [Old Master], Shaoye [Young Master] were all gifted scholars and intellects, none of their literary works was not renowned in the world, yet each one ran into misfortune. It was precisely because of their literary works that disaster came. But Third Mistress said the more the Manchurian Tatars did not want us, Han people to study and create literary works, the more reason for us to study, the more reason for us to create literary works; only then will we prevent the Tatars from achieving their hearts' desire."

"Can you create literary works?" Wei Xiaobao asked.

Shuang'er giggled and said, "Xianggong really loves to joke. How can a little servant girl create literary works? The Third Mistress taught me to read, yet I have read only seven or eight books."

"Wow!" Wei Xiaobao said, "You have read seven or eight books? That's a lot more than I can read. I only know seven or eight characters."

Shuang'er laughed and said, "Xianggong does not like to study, I am sure the Old Mistress would have loved you. She said that as soon as the Qing Dynasty arrived, only prodigal sons study."

"That's true!" Wei Xiaobao said, "I think that that thief Oboi was not too literate. It must be those bootlickers who read to him."

"Right!" Shuang'er said, "The book our First Young Master wrote was called something like 'History of the Ming Dynasty'. There were some words in the book scolding the Manchurian Qing. There was an evil man called Wu Zhirong who took the book to Oboi and lodged an accusation. This matter was blown out of proportion; several hundred people were executed; even the business proprietors who sold the book, the customers who bought the book, were all arrested and executed. Xianggong, you live in Beijing, have you met this man Wu Zhirong?"

"I have not," Wei Xiaobao replied, "I will slowly look for him, I am sure I will find him. Shuang'er, I am thinking of replacing you with someone else."

Shuang'er was shocked. "You ... you want to give me to someone else?" she said with trembling voice.

"Not giving you to someone else," Wei Xiaobao said, "I want to replace you with someone else."

Shuang'er's eyes had already turned red; she was about to cry. "What ... what do you mean replacing me with someone else?" she asked.

"Your Third Mistress gave you to me," Wei Xiaobao said, "Such a big gift is not easy to repay. I am thinking of catching that thief Wu Zhirong and give him to your Third Mistress. Then my gift will have more or less the same value as her gift."

Shuang'er laughed through her tears; she gently patted her own chest and said, "You scared me big time; I thought Xianggong did not want me anymore."

Wei Xiaobao was very happy; he said, "You were afraid I did not want you and became anxious like that. Don't worry, even if people pile a mountain of gold, a mountain of silver, a mountain of pearls, a mountain of gems, I will never trade you off."

While chatting, the two of them had reached the foot of the mountain. They saw the clear blue sky as if it had just been washed; there was not a single speck of dust within ten thousand li. Wei Xiaobao thought that the circumstances right now was entirely different from last night, where they were forced by the heavy rain to take shelter in the 'haunted house'. It's just that Xu Tianchuan, Fang Yi, Mu Jianping and the others lost the battle and were captured by the enemy; he did not know whether they would be able to escape from danger. Based on his own ability, he would not be able to save them anyway, so thinking about them would be useless, it would be better for him not to think.

After walking for several li, they arrived at a small town. The two of them found a noodle shop, so they went in to eat. After Wei Xiaobao had been seated, Shuang'er stood behind him, ready to serve.

Wei Xiaobao laughed and said, "You can't be too polite, sit down, let's eat together."

"It won't do," Shuang'er replied, "How can I sit and eat together with Xianggong? There is no such custom."

"Why should I care about damn custom or no custom?" Wei Xiaobao said, "When I say you can, then you can. If you wait until I finish eating before you start, we would be delayed too much."

"We'll leave as soon as Xianggong finish eating," Shuang'er said, "I'll buy some mantou [steamed bun], and eat it while we are walking. That way there won't be any delay."

Wei Xiaobao sighed. "I have a strange temperament," he said, "If I eat something alone, my stomach will definitely give me some trouble. If nobody accompanies me eating, a moment later I will have tummy ache, and then I'll have to accept my fate."

Shuang'er smiled sweetly; she had no choice but to pull the bench and sat down at an oblique angle from Wei Xiaobao at the corner of the table.

[Translator’s note: my original online source was the 2^nd Edition, while I also have the hard copy of the 3^rd Edition. The following part about the three lamas does not exist in the 3^rd Edition, but since I have translated this part anyway, I am including it here.]

Wei Xiaobao had only eaten several chopsticks from his bowl of noodles when he saw three Tibetan Lama entering the shop and sat facing the street. They repeatedly called out, "Bring out the noodles, bring out the noodles!"

One of the lamas' glance caught the string of pearls on Shuang'er's neck, he nudged his companion with his left elbow and pouted to hint toward the pearls. As soon as the other two saw it, a happy expression appeared on their faces; they could not take their eyes off the necklace, sizing it up.

"Not good," Wei Xiaobao mused, "These three fellows are going to rob us on the way." Taking out a piece of silver, he ordered the noodle shop waiter to hire a large carriage. After finishing his noodles in haste, he boarded the carriage, and ordered the driver to hurry to the west.

After galloping for several li, they heard the sound of hoof beat behind the carriage. Wei Xiaobao looked back, and sure enough, he saw those three lamas on horseback, coming to pursue them. He said to Shuang'er, "Those three bandits are going to snatch your pearls away. Just give it to them, I'll buy another string for you later."

"Yes!" Shuang'er said, "You don't need to buy another one for me."

They heard the three lamas called out, "Stop! Stop!" The driver pulled the reins of his mule. The three lamas leaped forward to block the carriage. One of them said, "You, two babies, get out!"

Shuang'er took the pearls necklace from her neck and held it outside the carriage; she said, "You fancy this string of pearls, Xianggong says you can have it, just get it."

A big and fat lama stretched out his big hand, but he did not take the pearls, he reached farther up and grabbed Shuang'er's wrist and pulled her outside. Wei Xiaobao anxiously said, "You want more money, I have some. Don't play rough!" But he saw a yellow shadow flashed, the lama leaped up to the air and flew backward. "Good skill!" Wei Xiaobao shouted in his heart. He saw the lama's body rapidly fall to the ground, but his head was down and his feet up. 'Splosh!' his big and fat head went straight into a swamp, all the way to his chest, his legs were kicking wildly.

Wei Xiaobao was pleasantly surprised; he wondered what kind of prominent martial art move this lama was executing. 'Wah! Wah!' the other two lamas were shouting randomly, while rushing forward to grab his body and pull him out of the mud. The fat lama's face was wet with mud; he was in such a sorry condition. Fortunately the heavy rain the previous night had soaked the dirt of the roadside swamp so that the lama was not injured.

Wei Xiaobao laughed aloud and told the carriage driver, "Quickly go!"

Shuang'er raised the pearls in her hand and asked, "Xianggong, shall I give these pearls to them?"

Before Wei Xiaobao could reply, he saw the three lamas drew their sabers from their waists and ferociously charged toward them. Shuang'er snatched the whip from the driver's hand and flicked it outward, it coiled around the saber in a lama's hand. She pulled the whip back and caught the saber with her left hand. She flicked the whip in her right hand again, and the saber in the second lama's hand was snatched away.

"Aiyo!" the third lama cried out, and stopped dead in his track. Shuang'er flicked her whip again, but this time it coiled around the lama's neck. She pulled him toward the carriage, and then without any trouble snatched the saber in the lama's hand.

The lama's throat was strangled by the whip, his eyes turned white, his tongue was stretched out, his face was instantly devoid of any blood. The other two lamas rushed toward Shuang'er in converging attack from left and right, trying to save their companion. Shuang'er leaped up, her left foot stood on the axle of the carriage, her right foot repeatedly kicked, the acupoints on the two lamas' heads were sealed, they passed out and fell to the ground. She waved her hand to loosen up the whip. The lama had been suffocated for a good while, he also lost his consciousness and fell down.

Wei Xiaobao was extremely delighted; he sprang up and called out, "Shuang'er, good Shuang'er, turns out your martial art skill is superb."

---

[1] Lake Tai, near Wuxi City, bordering Jiangsu and Zhejiang, one of China’s largest fresh water lake.

[2] Shuang’er said ‘wenzi yu’, Wei Xiaobao thought she said ‘wenzi rou’ (different characters, sound alike).

[foxs]

Shuang'er showed a faint smile and said, "It was nothing, these three bandits are useless."

"If I had known earlier, I would not have to worry for half a day," Wei Xiaobao said. Jumping down from the carriage, he kicked the body of a lama. "What do you want?" he asked. But the lama was still fainted and had not regained his consciousness.

Shuang'er kicked his waist. The lama groaned and regained his consciousness. Shuang'er said, "Xianggong asks what do you want?"

"Miss ..." the lama said, "Miss can do ... do magic?"

Shuang'er smiled. "Answer quickly!" she said, "What are you up to?"

The lama said, "We ... we are lamas from Mount Wutai's Bodhisattva Peak ... Great Manjushri Temple."

Shuang'er frowned. "What lama or not lama?" she said, "Rubbish! You are speaking vulgar language."

"Lamas are Buddhist monks of Tibet," Wei Xiaobao explained.

"Turns out you are Buddhist monks," Shuang'er said. She gently kicked the lama again and said, "If you are Buddhist monks, how come you do not shave your whole head clean?"

"We are lamas," the lama said, "Not Buddhist monks."

"What?" Shuang'er said, "Still won't admit it? Xianggong says you are Buddhist monks, then you are Buddhist monks!" She kicked the 'tian huo' [heavenly opening] acupoint on his waist, the lama felt the pain went straight into his bones and marrow; he could not bear it and shouting and screaming in loud voice. The pain grew worse, and his shout grew louder.

The other two lamas slowly regained their consciousness, hearing their companion was screaming like a pig being slaughtered, they were aghast and immediately asked in Tibetan what had happened. The other lama replied, and then called out in Chinese, "I am a Buddhist monk, I am a Buddhist monk. I am whatever Miss ... Miss said what I am. Please ... please quickly ... unseal my acupoint."

Shuang'er laughed. "Whatever Miss says does not count, it's whatever Xianggong says that count," she said, "Xianggong, what do you say he is?"

Wei Xiaobao laughed. "I say he is a Buddhist nun!" he said.

The lama really could not bear the pain, he hastily said, "I am a Buddhist nun, I am a Buddhist nun!" Wei Xiaobao and Shuang'er roared in laughter.

Shuang'er lightly kicked the 'qi hu' [chi door] acupoint on his neck with her left foot, the severe pain stopped immediately. But the lama was still screaming, "I am a Buddhist nun, I am a Buddhist nun!"

Wei Xiaobao stopped laughing. He said, "You are people who have left home, why did you want to rob our belongings?"

"Xiaoren deserves to die," the lama replied, "Next time we won't dare to do it again."

"You are still thinking of next time?" Wei Xiaobao asked.

The lama said, "I said we won't dare, we really won't dare. Even after a hundred years have passed, we still won't dare."

Wei Xiaobao said, "You do not chant Buddhist scripture in the temple, but coming down the mountain instead. What are you up to?"

The lama replied, "It's ... it's Shifu who sends us down the mountain."

"Your Shifu sends you down the mountain to rob gold, silver and jewels?" Wei Xiaobao asked.

"No ... not that," the lama replied, "We are going to Beijing ..." he had just spoken to this point, the other big and fat lama coughed.

Wei Xiaobao cast a glance toward him, he saw that fat lama repeatedly winked his eyes, obviously he was signaling his companion not to tell the truth. At first Wei Xiaobao was thinking that these lamas were provoking evil designs upon seeing riches, robbing and plundering, but doing nothing serious. Manchurians believed in lamas; whenever there was a religious ritual to be performed in the Palace, they would always invite lamas to chant the sutras. If the imperial household was like that, the princes and dukes and other royalties need not be mentioned. Therefore, quite a number of lamas, who did not need to observe the Qing law, went on the rampage in Beijing. Wei Xiaobao was thinking of torturing these lamas for a while, and after he had enough fun, he would simply let them go. However, seeing the big fat lama's expression, he knew there was something else going on. He said, "These three fellows are playing tricks. Shuang'er, give each one a kick, let these three people whine on for days, and then we are off!"

"Yes!" Shuang'er complied. She could also see that the big fat lama was playing tricks, hence she kicked him first on his 'tian huo' acupoint. The lama immediately screamed.

Shuang'er walked over to the first lama and lifted her foot as if she was going to kick. The lama was shocked; he hastily said, "Don't kick, I'll tell you everything. Shifu sends us to Beijing to deliver a letter."

"What letter?" Wei Xiaobao asked.

The lama said, "This ... we can't let you see this letter. If we show it to other people, Shi ... Shifu will definitely kill us."

"Take it out!" Wei Xiaobao said, "If you don't, I'll kick you." While saying that, he took a step forward.

The lama did not know that Wei Xiaobao's martial art skill was limited, if he was kicked, the pain would be the same as if he was tickled. Seeing Wei Xiaobao lifting up his foot, he busily said, "I don't ... I don't have it with me."

"Take it out!" Wei Xiaobao said.

The lama had no choice, he went over to the fat lama and mumbled some Tibetan words. The fat lama also used Tibetan to reply; while squealing like a slaughtered pig, he appeared to be shouting some disjointed Tibetan words so that his voice was even more unpleasant to the ears. From the tone of his voice and his expression, Wei Xiaobao deduced that the fat lama did not allow the other lama to take the letter out. Thereupon he walked over to the fat lama and fiercely kicked the fat lama's forehead. The big and fat lama fainted instantly. The other lama then took a small oilcloth package from the fat lama's bosom, and trembling with fear, he presented the package with both hands.

Wei Xiaobao received the package. Shuang'er also took out a small package from her bosom and produced a tiny pair of scissors. She cut the package open, as expected, there was a letter inside. There were two lined of Tibetan script written on the envelope. "To whom is this letter addressed to?" Wei Xiaobao asked.

"To our Shibo [older martial uncle]," the lama replied.

Wei Xiaobao reached out and 'rip!' he tore the envelope open. The two lamas groaned repeatedly. Wei Xiaobao saw several lines of curvy Tibetan script written on a sheet of yellow paper, on the bottom, drawn in cinnabar ink, there was a weird-looking seal, it was totally unintelligible. Even if this letter was written in Chinese script, Wei Xiaobao would not understand. Thereupon he handed it over to Shuang'er and asked, "What does it say?"

Shuang'er did not know either; she turned to the lama, "Xianggong asks you: what does it say? Tell us quickly! If you speak half a word of lie, I will kick your acupoint immediately and never unseal it again. Humph, I will wait for at least three days and three nights before unsealing it."

The lama received the letter, looked at it over and over, and stammered, "This ... this is ..."

"What this or that?" Wei Xiaobao said, "Tell me quickly!"

"Yes, yes!" the lama replied, "The letter says, the person Shixiong was asking about ..." He had just spoken that sentence, the other lama suddenly mumbled some unintelligible words. Shuang'er leaped toward him and kicked him on the 'tian huo' acupoint. The lama's words turned into screaming and wailing.

The first lama's countenance changed greatly; with a trembling voice he said, "The letter says ... says that the person we are looking for, we can't find it even after searching high and low. He is definitely ... definitely not on Mount Wutai."

Wei Xiaobao saw the lama's eyes were evasive while repeatedly swallowing his own saliva as he was talking, he thought, "Although I don't understand your bird's cry or dog's bark, looking at your expression, I can tell that you are lying. It's just that this fellow is too stupid, even when telling a lie, he is not convincing." He said to Shuang'er, "This lama is lying to us."

Shuang'er said, "Since he is that bad, we can't spare him." She raised her foot and kicked his 'tian huo' acupoint.

The lama cried out, "You ... just kill me. My Shixiong said that ... that if we tell you what the letter says, we ... the three of us will not live. You ... you kill me quickly."

"Ignore him, let's go!" Wei Xiaobao said. Together with Shuang'er, they leaped onto the carriage.

The carriage driver saw that although these two were young, unexpectedly they were able to deal with the three lamas and made them hovering between life and death. He was full of admiration and did not stop praising them. Wei Xiaobao said in a low voice, "When we get to the small town ahead, you may need to change. This string of pearls must be kept someplace else."

[The 3^rd Edition continues with the following:]

After the two of them finished eating the noodles, Wei Xiaobao said, "You are wearing women's clothes, a lot of people along the way will look at you because you are too pretty. When we get to the small town ahead, you may need to change. This string of pearls must be kept someplace else."

"Yes," Shuang'er said, "What attire must I change into?"

Wei Xiaobao smiled and said, "You change into a man's clothing."

After travelling for about thirty li, the carriage reached a big town. Wei Xiaobao sent the carriage driver off, while they entered an inn to lodge for the night. He took out some money and instructed Shuang'er to go buy some clothing. Shuang'er purchased several sets and returned to the inn; she put on the clothes and was transformed into a handsome young attendant.

With this transformation, they no longer attracted any attention along the way. Shuang'er was well-versed in martial art, but was completely oblivious of the ways of the world; all along the way, she left the decision making into Wei Xiaobao's hands, although his ideas were not always brilliant. Thirty percent of the time he was serious, the other seventy percent he was simply fooling around.

One day they arrived at the border between Hebei and Shanxi, two provinces. From Fuping County of Zhili provinces[1] to the west, over the Great Wall mountain range, they would reach the Long Quan [lit. dragon spring] Pass. This Long Quan Pass was actually the eastern gateway to Mount Wutai. The stony path was rugged, the ridges and peaks were high and steep. Upon entering Mount Wutai, the first temple they encountered was the Yong Quan Temple [lit. bubbling spring].

Wei Xiaobao inquired the whereabouts of the Qing Liang Temple, but Mount Wutai was actually very big, Qing Liang Temple was located between the Nan Tai Peak and Zhong Tai Peak [Translator's note: I am not familiar with Mount Wutai's geography, Nan Tai and Zhong Tai mean 'southern platform' and 'middle platform', respectively]. The distance from Yong Quan Temple was really not near.

That evening Wei Xiaobao and Shuang'er seek lodging at the Lu Family Village neighboring the Yong Quan Temple. They ate a bowl of mutton and bread soup and some candy. He recalled the cold demeanor of the Yong Quan Temple's monk when he was asking about the Qing Liang Temple's location earlier that day. When the monk saw how young he was, the monk did not pay him any attention; instead of explaining the location of the Qing Liang Temple, the monk asked him back, "The road is long and difficult to walk, what are you going to Qing Liang Temple for?" This nasty attitude was seventy-percent similar to the selfish, concerned-only-with-gaining-advantages-for-themselves, bald-headed thieves of the Chan Zhi Temple [lit. Dhyana Wisdom] in Yangzhou. It would not be easy to look for Emperor Shunzhi when he reached Qing Liang Temple later; he must find another way.

While his mouth was chewing the candy, his mind was churning, "They say money will make the devil turn millstones, perhaps I can make the monks to turn the millstones as well. I once heard the storyteller told the story of Lu Zhishen of the 'Water Margin' went to Mount Wutai to become a monk. A certain outsider gave considerable alms to the Temple. Lu Zhishen created havoc in the Temple, drinking wine and eating dog meat, yet the old monk was not angry. That's right, I am going to pretend that I need to perform a Buddhist ceremony, scatter a large sum of money in the Temple, and then making an excuse to stay in the Temple and won't leave, and thus I can slowly looking for the old Emperor. The old monks can't possibly drive me away."

However, upon entering the mountain, other than the temples, they did not see any town where he could exchange a five-hundred-tael banknote. Without any choice they had to leave Long Quan Pass and returned to Fuping. He exchanged the banknote into silver currency, and then both he and Shuang'er changed into brand new clothes; he thought, "I want to perform a Buddhist ceremony, but I don't understand anything. I am afraid I'll give myself away in short moment. I should have some practice first."

Thereupon he went to a temple within the Fuping county city wall called the Jixiang Temple [lit. auspicious/lucky] and kowtowed several times in front of the Buddha image. The welcoming monk came out with a register book, writing brush and ink stone. Wei Xiaobao brushed him off and said, "Giving alms is giving alms, why do you need to write anything?" He took out a fifty-tael worth of yuanbao and handed it over to the monk. The monk was greatly surprised, thinking that this young benefactor was very generous, which was a rarity in the world. Immediately he thanked him repeatedly, invited him to the dining room and offered him vegetarian dishes and plain noodles.

When Wei Xiaobao was eating the noodles, the Abbot sat next to him to keep him company, greatly praising his kind-heartedness and reverence, which would definitely receive the Bodhisattva's blessing; in the future Wei Xiaobao would definitely win top marks in the imperial examinations, to be a Zhuangyuan [see Chapter 1], his house would be full of children and grandchildren, he would enjoy boundless good fortune. Wei Xiaobao was secretly amused, musing that you have flattered me very well, I am totally illiterate, yet you say I would win top marks in the imperial examinations and be a Zhuangyuan; won't that mean you are cursing me on my face? He said, "Old Monk, I want to go to Mount Wutai to perform a big Buddhist ceremony, it's just that I do not know anything. I want you to give me advice."

Hearing the three characters 'big Buddhist ceremony', the Abbot stood up immediately and said, "Shizhu [benefactor], all temples under the heavens are dedicated to worship Buddha, the same Bodhisattva. If you want to perform a Buddhist ceremony, it would be better to do it in a small temple, which will cover everything you need thoroughly and properly; actually you don't need to painstakingly go up Mount Wutai."

Wei Xiaobao shook his head. "That won't do," he said, "This Buddhist ceremony is my cherished desire, I simply must perform it on Mount Wutai." While saying that, he took out another fifty-tael worth of yuanbao and said, "How about this: find someone for me to accompany me to Mount Wutai and be my helper. This fifty-tael is for him."

The old monk was greatly delighted. "That's easy, that's easy!" he said. He had a younger cousin[2] who was the caretaker of the temple property: collecting the rent and purchasing stuffs for the temple, everything was handled by him, but he was not a monk. Immediately the old monk summoned him and introduced him to Wei Xiaobao.

---

[1] Fuping county, Baoding, Hebei. Zhili – see Chapter 9.

[2] Orig. biaodi, younger male cousin from mother's side.

[foxs]

This man was surnamed Yu, given name single character Ba, a loud-mouthed man, but his nickname was 'One Less Stroke'. Actually, if a stroke (一) is added to the character Yu (于), it will become the character Wang (王), therefore, Yu Ba (于八) will change into Wang Ba (王八)[1]. In just a few words, Wei Xiaobao had already felt that he was a very congenial companion. Since he was little, Wei Xiaobao was used to hang around this kind of boorish man in the marketplace. This time suddenly he met one such man in Fuping County, he had the feeling like he had met an old friend far from home.

Wei Xiaobao consulted the Abbot again on various customs involved in performing Buddhist ceremony. The Abbot told him everything he knew, and he talked endlessly. Wei Xiaobao thought, "Buddhist monks' rules are indeed a lot!" He donated twenty more taels.

Taking Yu Ba along, Wei Xiaobao returned to the inn, took out some money, and sent him off to buy everything they need. With money in his hand, Yu Ba worked really fast; before long, he had returned with all his purchases. For himself, he bought a set of fresh and bright colored clothes. "Wei Xianggong," he said, "You are a rich man, now that I am your attendant, I should put on something with more style, don't you think? This set of clothes, shoes and hat is no more than three taels and five qian."

Wei Xiaobao thought he had a good point, thereupon he sent him off again to buy several sets of luxurious clothing for him and Shuang'er. With a lot of fanfare the three of them went out the Long Quan Pass, followed by eight porters, each carrying a shoulder pole laden with vegetarian food and gifts for Buddhist monks, travelled along the main road heading south.

Upon entering Mount Wutai, after walking for only several li, they had already seen a temple. After the Yong Quan Temple, there was Jing Tai Lu [lit. scripture platform foothill] Temple, and then Shi Fo [lit. Buddha Rock] Temple, Pu Ji [lit. universal crossing] Temple, Gu Fo [lit. ancient Buddha] Temple, Jin Gang [lit. diamond, steel or Vajra - Buddha's warrior attendant] Warehouse, Bai Yun [lit. white cloud] Temple, Jin Deng [lit. golden lantern] Temple, and finally Ling Jing [lit. virtual environment] Temple.

That evening they spent the night at the Ling Jing Temple. At dawn the next day, they continued northbound until they reached Jin Ge [lit. golden pavilion] Temple, and then turned west for several li, and arrived at the Qing Liang Temple. This Qing Liang Temple was located at the peak of Qing Liang mountain. It was not more imposing compared to the other temples they saw along the way, the main gate to the monastery was shabby; obviously it was worn down by years of non-repair. Wei Xiaobao was rather disappointed, "When the Emperor left home to become a Buddhist monk, he must have chosen the biggest temple. I am afraid the old turtle Hai was just spouting nonsense, perhaps the old emperor became a monk not in this place."

Yu Ba entered the gate to inform the welcoming monk that a certain high official from Beijing by the surname of Wei had come to perform a Buddhist ceremony, to fast and to offer sacrificial offering to Buddha. Looking at the luxurious clothing this party of people wore, plus the eight shoulder poles of offering, the welcoming monk immediately invited them in and offered them some tea, while he went in to report to the Abbot.

The Abbot, old monk Cheng Guang [lit. clear light] came into the side room to meet Wei Xiaobao. He asked, "I wonder what kind of Buddhist ceremony Benefactor is going to perform?"

Seeing this Abbot Cheng Guang was very tall, but as thin as a stick, his eyes were half-closed, his overall appearance looked washed out, Wei Xiaobao was even more disappointed, he said, "Disciple wants to perform a seven days and seven nights Buddhist ceremony on behalf of disciple's deceased father, as well as several deceased friends, so that they may be released from suffering."

Cheng Guang said, "There are many big temples within Beijing's city limit, temples on Mount Wutai are also numerous; I wonder why did Benefactor specifically travel so far away to Mount Wutai and go to a small temple to perform Buddhist ceremony?"

Wei Xiaobao had anticipated this question, hence he had already discussed it over with Yu Ba. He said, "My mother had a dream on the fifteenth of last month. In her dream she saw my deceased father, who told her that during his life he had committed grave sins, he said we must go to Qing Liang Temple on Mount Wutai, to ask Fangzhang Dashi [Great Master Abbot] to perform a seven days and seven nights repentance ritual to clear away the blood disaster so that my father in the underworld does not receive endless agony."

He did not know his own father, neither did he know if his father was still alive or had already died. When he said those words, he could not help feeling funny; he mused, "Damn it, you gave birth to laozi, and then washed your hand and did not care at all, you deserve to go to hell. Now laozi is giving you a seven days and seven nights Buddhist ceremony, it is your enormous good fortune."

"So that's how it is," Cheng Guang said, "Young Benefactor, the proverb said it well: the day has its thought, the night has its dream. The matter of the dream must never be taken seriously."

"Da Heshang [great monk]," Wei Xiaobao said, "The proverbs said it well: it is better to believe than disbelieve. Even if what my father said in the dream was not real, by performing a Buddhist ceremony on his behalf to release his soul from suffering, we are performing a virtue. But if my father really did say those words, yet we do not do as he wished, in the underworld he is being bullied and tormented by the Ox-Head, Horse-Face and little demon Wuchang, that ... that ... won't I always feel a little bit bad? Besides, I am under my mother's order. Mother said that the old abbot of Qing Liang Temple of Mount Wutai has a destiny with her; this Buddhist ceremony must be performed in your precious temple." He mused, "You have a destiny with my Mama, this is preposterous! Have you ever been to the Lovely Spring Courtyard in Yangzhou to be my mother's customer?"

"Hey," Cheng Guang exclaimed, "Benefactor did not know this: my humble temple is of Zen Buddhism. This kind of repentance ritual is a Pure Land[2] Sects' matter, which we do not do. On this Mount Wutai, Jin Ge Temple, Pu Ji Temple, Da Fo Temple, Yan Qing Temple, and many more are of the Pure Land Sect. Benefactor is advised to go to one of those temples to perform the Buddhist ceremony."

Wei Xiaobao thought that in Fuping County, the Abbot was trying to seize the opportunity to perform the Buddhist ceremony, but here, this old monk had used all sorts of excuses trying to push away the money delivered into his gate with both hands; something strange was going on here. He asked over and over, but Cheng Guang did not budge. He stood up and said to the welcoming monk, "Show the Benefactor the way to Jin Ge Temple, Lao Na[3] keeps him company only for a moment."

Wei Xiaobao was anxious, he hastily said, "Since the Abbot insists on not giving me permission, I want to ask the great monks of your precious temple to receive the alms: the Buddhist robes, the monk hats, as well as the money I bring to your precious temple."

Cheng Guang put his palms together, "Many thanks," he said. Seeing eight shoulder poles of gifts Wei Xiaobao brought, unexpectedly he did not show the least bit of enthusiasm.

Wei Xiaobao said, “Mother instructed me to personally hand over each gift to the great monks of your precious monastery, even the monks helping with the fire and growing vegetable in the garden are to have a share. I bring altogether three hundred sets of gift, if it is not enough, we will go buy some more.”

Cheng Guang said, “Enough, it’s too much. Our temple has only fifty something people. Would Benefactor please leave only fifty or sixty sets? That would be enough.”
Wei Xiaobao said, “Is it possible to ask the Abbot to summon the monks in the temple, so that I could personally hand over the gift? This is my mother’s wish; no matter what I must accomplish it.”

Cheng Guang raised his head, suddenly his eyes flashed like lightning, as he swept his gaze over Wei Xiaobao’s face. “Very well!” he said, “Our Buddha is merciful, let it be as the Benefactor wishes.” Turning around, he walked inside.

Looking at his bamboo-pole like back walking inside, Wei Xiaobao felt an unspeakably uncomfortable feeling in his heart. Awkwardly he lifted the tea cup into his mouth. Standing behind him, Yu Ba muttered in low voice, “In all his life, the one surnamed Yu has rarely seen this kind of unlucky old monk. No wonder in such a big temple like Qing Liang Temple, even the golden image of Bodhisattva is tattered.”

They heard the bell in the temple was struck, the welcoming monk said, “Please step into the western hall to give your alms.”

Wei Xiaobao went to the western hall; he saw the monks were streaming in. He handed over the gift one by one, while attentively looking at each monk’s face. He thought, “I have never seen the Emperor Shunzhi, but he is the young emperor’s papa, their appearances must be somewhat similar. As long as I can find a monk that look like an older version of the young emperor, he must be it.”

But after he finished handing over more than fifty sets of gifts, not only he did not see any ‘older version of the young emperor’, he could not find even a single monk with one or two part resemblance to the young emperor. Wei Xiaobao was very disappointed; but suddenly he remembered, “He was the Emperor; with his status, how could he come to accept alms like clothing and hats? This plan of mine is really stupid!” He asked the welcoming monk, “Have all monks in your precious temple come?”

The welcoming monk replied, “Everybody has received your alms, thank you very much for Benefactor’s generosity.”

“Everyone has received the gift?” Wei Xiaobao asked, “I am afraid it’s not necessarily true, perhaps there are some people who are unwilling to come and get the gift.”

“Benefactor is joking,” the welcoming monk said, “How can there be such thing?”

“Those who have left home do not tell lies,” Wei Xiaobao said, “If you deceive me, when you die, your tongue will be pulled out in hell.” As soon as the welcoming monk heard that, his countenance changed. Wei Xiaobao said, “Since there are still some monks who have not received the gift, would great monk please invite him to receive it?”

The welcoming monk shook his head. “Only Fangzhang Dashi has not received the gift,” he said, “I think we do not need to ask the Senior to come out again.”

Right this moment, a monk hurriedly rushed in. “Shixiong,” he said, “There are more than a dozen lamas outside wishing to see the Abbot.” And then with a low voice he added, “They all carry weapons, and are rubbing their fists and palms; their purpose in coming is definitely not good.”

The welcoming monk frowned and said, “Like river water and well water, the green and yellow temples of Mount Wutai have never interfered with each other. What do they want, coming over here? Go and report to the Abbot, I am coming out to look." Finished speaking, he turned to Wei Xiaobao and said, "Excuse me," and then with quick steps he went out.

Wei Xiaobao laughed and said, "I am afraid those stinky lamas are here for us." He thought Shuang'er's martial art skill was superior, a dozen or so lamas should not give them any problem. Suddenly he heard commotion from outside the gate, a group of people were crashing into the Hall of Great Strength[4]. Wei Xiaobao said, "Let us see the excitement." Pulling Shuang'er's hand, he went out together with her.

As they arrived at the main hall, they saw the welcoming monk was surrounded by a dozen or so yellow-robed lamas, who were shouting randomly and talking to him at once, "We must search; someone personally saw him coming to Qing Liang Temple." "You are in the wrong here, why do you hide people?" "Just hand him over to us nicely, we'll let this matter drop; otherwise, humph, humph!"

[The following paragraph does not exist in the 3^rd Edition, which makes sense, since Wei Xiaobao has never met any lamas before:

Wei Xiaobao went into the main hall and stood with hands on his waist, thinking, "Laozi is here, go get your horse and get me." Who would have thought that those lamas ignored him completely; no one even cast a glance to him.]

Amidst the commotion, Abbot Cheng Guang walked in; he asked slowly, "What's the matter?"

The welcoming monk said, "It's good for the Abbot to know, they ..."

As soon as the word 'Abbot' came out of his mouth, the lamas swarmed around Cheng Guang, shouting, "You are the Abbot? That's great!" "Quickly hand the man over! If not, your temple will be burned to the ground." "This is preposterous, really preposterous!" "Are you telling me that after you become a Buddhist monk, you throw reasons out the window?"

Cheng Guang asked, "May I ask, from which temple are numerous Shixiong coming from? You have honored our humble temple with your presence, I wonder what is the purpose of your visit?"

A lama wearing red kasaya over his yellow robe replied, "We came from Tibet, we come to the Central Plain on business under the order of the Living Buddha. Who knew that one of our young lama attendants was kidnapped by a wicked monk, and is hidden inside the Qing Liang Temple? Monk Abbot, quickly hand over our young lama; otherwise, we won't let this matter rest."

"That's very strange," Cheng Guang replied, "Our temple here is Zen Buddhism green temple, we usually do not have any association with Tibetan Tantra Buddhists. Why don't you inquire to the yellow temples everywhere about your missing young lama?"

The lama angrily said, "Someone saw it with his own eyes; that lama is in Qing Liang Temple. That was the reason we came here to inquire. Otherwise, do you think we have just eaten our rice until we are full and have nothing else to do, and thus we came here to make a scene? Decide it for yourself, if you hand over the young lama quickly, we will look at the monk's face or Buddha's face, we won't investigate this matter further."

Cheng Guang shook his head and said, "Even if there was a young lama coming to Qing Liang Temple, and gentlemen did not come to inquire, Lao Na can't possibly hide him here."

Several lamas shouted together, "Let us search you temple then!"

Cheng Guang still shook his head, "This is Buddhist's peaceful place, how can I let people search around as they wish?"

The leader of the lamas said, "If you do not feel as guilty as a thief, why don't you let us search? Obviously the young lama is here, he is definitely in the Qing Liang Temple."

Cheng Guang shook his head. Two lamas reached out and grabbed him by the collar, shouting, "Will you or will you not let us search the temple?" Another lama said, "Could it be that there are women of good families hidden in the great monk's temple, hence you are afraid others might find out? Otherwise, what's the big deal of letting us search your temple?" By this time, about a dozen monks from Qing Liang Temple had come out, but they were blocked by the lamas so that they were unable to come near their Abbot.

[2^nd Edition: In low voice Shuang'er asked, "Xianggong, shall I get rid of them?"

"Wait a moment!" Wei Xiaobao said.]

He [Wei Xiaobao] thought, "Clearly these lamas are here to make trouble without reason; how can this temple hide some young lama? Is it possible that their intention is the same as mine, they are also looking for Emperor Shunzhi?"

He saw a flash of white light, two lamas already had daggers in their hands, each pointing at Cheng Guang’s chest and back. With stern voice they said, “If you don’t allow us to search, we’ll kill you first.”

Cheng Guang’s face did not show the smallest hint of fear. “Amitabha Buddha,” he said, “We all are Buddha’s disciples, why should you use force?”

The two lamas slightly pushed their daggers forward. “Great Monk,” they shouted, “Please forgive our offense.” Cheng Guang’s body slipped sideways, carried by their own momentum, the two lamas’ daggers were thrust into each other’s chest. The two of them hastily stretched out their left palms to push into each other and hence they both withdrew several steps backward.

---

[1] Put together, 'wang ba' means tortoise / cuckold / (insult with the flavor of bastard, son of a *****).

[2] From the dictionary: Usually refers to Amitabha Buddha's Western Pure Land of Ultimate Bliss (Sukhavati in Sanskrit).

[3] Lit. 'old cassock', the term used by Buddhist monks to refer to themselves.

[4] The main hall of a Buddhist temple where the main image of veneration is located.

[foxs]

The rest of the people shouted, “Qing Liang Temple’s Abbot assaults people! He commits murder!” In the middle of their shouts, from the main door rushed thirty, forty people; there were monks, lamas, and several lay people wearing long gowns. An old lama with white beard and wearing yellow robe shouted, “Did Qing Liang Temple’s Abbot kill someone?”

Cheng Guang put his palms together, “Those who left home to be Buddhist monks use mercy as the guiding principle; how can they rashly violate the commandment against taking life? Shixiong, Benefactors, where did you come from?” To a fifty-something old monk he said, “Turns out Fo Guang Temple’s Abbot Xinxi himself has honored us with his presence, and yet I did not come out far enough to welcome you. Please forgive my offense.”

Fo Guang Temple was the oldest among big temples on Mount Wutai. It was constructed during the first Wei Emperor Xiao Wen, and was quite established for a long time. Local people had a saying, “First it was Fo Guang Temple, then there is Mount Wutai.” Actually, Mount Wutai’s original name was Mount Qing Liang [same Qing Liang as the temple’s name], afterwards, with the discovery of the five major peaks, it was renamed Mount Wutai, but at that time, Fo Guang Temple had already been established. The name Mount Wutai was only changed during the great undertaking of establishing the Sui Dynasty. Within the Buddhist community, Fo Guang Temple position was far above Qing Liang Temple, and thus Abbot Xinxi was the de facto leader of various green temples on Mount Wutai.

This monk was fat with big head and plump ears, his face was greasy and shiny; with a giggle he said, “Cheng Guang Shixiong, let me introduce you to two friends.” Pointing to the old lama, he said, “This is Great Lama Bayan Fashi[1], who has just arrived from Lhasa, Tibet, the one most doted on and trusted by the Seat of the Living Buddha, the Great Lama with most authority.”

Cheng Guang put his palms together and said, “Brought together by fate, I pay my respect to the Great Lama.” Bayan nodded, his manner was very arrogant.

Xinxi pointed to a man wearing dark green plain garment, a scholar of about thirty something, and said, “This is the famous scholar of Western Sichuan, Huangfu Ge, Mr. Huangfu.”

Huangfu Ge cupped his fist across his chest and said, “It’s an honor to meet Great Monk Cheng Guang, whose divine martial ability is well-known. Today I can see you, it is truly the good fortune of three lifetimes.”

Cheng Guang put his palms together and said, “The old monk is indeed very old, when I was little, I learned some tiny skill, but I have already forgotten about it completely. Huangfu Jushi[2] is quite established in both pen and sword, deserving my congratulations.”

Hearing these people were speaking politely to each other, Wei Xiaobao thought that the fight most probably would not happen; there would not be any excitement to watch, therefore, there would be less opportunity for him to fish in troubled water, an opportunity for him to look for the old emperor. Inwardly, he was quite disappointed.

“Great Monk,” Bayan said, “From Tibet I brought along a young disciple, but he is detained in your temple. Please look at the Living Buddha’s golden face and release him; everybody will appreciate your kindness.”

Cheng Guang showed a faint smile as he said, “These several Shixiong came to create trouble in my humble temple, Lao Na was not willing to lower myself to their level. Dashi is a fair and reasonable man, how could you also listen to rumor? Since Qing Liang Temple was established, perhaps today is the very first time we are honored with the lama masters’ visit. Where did you hear that we have detained your precious temple’s disciple?”

Bayan rolled his eyes, with a loud voice he barked, “Are you saying we accused you wrongly? You don’t want to drink as a forfeit but take … take a toast.” His Chinese was not too good, it was actually ‘to refuse a toast only to be forced to drink a forfeit’, but he said it backwards.

Xinxi laughed and said, “The two gentlemen must not harm the friendly relation. In Lao Na’s opinion, whether that young lama is in the Qing Liang Temple or not, speaking is cheap, the proof is in seeing. Let Huangfu Jushi and this impoverished monk be the witness, everybody can search around the Qing Liang Temple just this once. Seeing Buddha worship Buddha, meeting a monk nodding to the monk; each place, each monk will see it himself, if the young lama is still cannot be found, won’t that mean we don’t have any problem anymore?” Speaking back and forth, in the end he still wanted to do a search of the Qing Liang Temple.

A displeased expression flashed on Cheng Guang’s face. He said, “These lama masters came from Tibet, no wonder they do not understand our Han people’s custom. Xinxi Dashi is a person of virtue and prestige, how could you say such thing? If this young lama was indeed lost on Mount Wutai, then every monastery has to be searched, perhaps we must start from Fo Guang Temple.”

Xinxi giggled and said, “If after we search for him in Qing Liang Temple and still cannot find him, if these lamas wish to take a look at Fo Guang Temple, they are very, very welcome to do so.”

Bayan said, “Someone saw it with his own eyes that the young fellow is definitely in the Qing Liang Temple, hence we came here to inquire. Otherwise, we would not dare … would not dare to be this … this brave in the dark [昧冒- mei mao].” He wanted to say ‘presumptuous’ [冒昧 – mao mei], but had it backward again.

Cheng Guang said, “I wonder who had seen him?”

Bayan pointed to Huangfu Ge and said, “This Mr. Huangfu has seen him; he is a greatly well-known man, he can’t possibly tell a lie.”

Wei Xiaobao mused, “You are obviously in cahoots with each other, how can you be the witness?” He could not help but asking, “How old is that young lama?”

All along Bayan, Xinxi, Huangfu Ge and the others did not take any notice of the two children standing on the side. Suddenly hearing him asking question, they all turned their attention to him. They saw his magnificent and expensive clothing and personal adornments, the gem embedded on his hat, and the pearls pinned on his lapel. In short, he was a young boy from a rich family. The young boy attendant standing by his side was also wearing silk and satin. Xinxi laughed and said, “That young lama is more or less of the same age as young master.”

Wei Xiaobao turned his head around and said, “That’s what I thought. Didn’t we just clearly see this young lama? He was entering a big temple. There were several characters written in front of the temple. That’s right, I think it was ‘Fo Guang Temple’, three large characters. This young lama has entered the Fo Guang Temple.” As soon as he said that, Bayan and the others’ countenances changed. But Cheng Guang was secretly happy.

Bayan shouted, “Hushuo Badao, Hushuo Jiudao[3]!” He thought by adding one degree of ‘way’ he would increase the degree of absurdity.

Wei Xiaobao laughed and said, “Hushuo Shidao, Hushuo Shiyidao, Hushuo Shi’erdao, Hushuo Shisandao!” [ten, eleven, twelve and thirteen, respectively]

Bayan was unable to restrain his rage; reaching out, he was going to grab Wei Xiaobao’s chest. Cheng Guang raised his right hand slightly, the sleeve of his robe sent out a strong gust of wind toward the base of Bayan’s elbow. Bayan stretched his left hand forward, like a bird’s claw his five fingers grabbed the sleeve. Cheng Guang pulled his arm back, his sleeve coiled around the claw so that the grabbing movement was halted. Bayan called out, “You are concealing our Seat of Living Buddha’s young lama, now you want to fight and kill people? Rebellion, rebellion!”

In a loud and clear voice Huangfu Ge said, “Everybody calm down, if you have something to say, let’s discuss it over, don’t play rough.” As soon as the word ‘rough’ left his mouth, suddenly from outside the temple a large group of people called out together, “Mr. Huangfu’s order: Everybody calm down, if you have something to say, let’s discuss it over, don’t play rough.”

Listening to the sound, it seemed like several hundred people had surrounded Qing Liang Temple. These people heard Huangfu Ge’s loud and clear voice, and immediately echoed him together, obviously they wanted to intimidate the opponent. Even Cheng Guang, whose internal energy cultivation was very deep, as he suddenly heard this sudden rise of voice, could not help but was greatly shaken.

With a chuckle Huangfu Ge said, “Abbot Cheng Guang, you are a martial art expert of older generation in the Wulin world, yet you are covering your light and nurturing in the dark in here, everybody admires you very much. This Great Lama Bayan wants to search your precious monastery, why don’t you allow him to do so? Great Monk walks in straight path, treads on upright way, the wind clears up the sky revealing the moon, Qing Liang Temple does not have anything that other people cannot see, why would we all harm the friendliness of the Wulin world?”

Cheng Guang was secretly worried; although he himself had a high martial art skill, in Qing Liang Temple he only sat in meditation and expounded Buddhist teachings, and did not impart martial art skill to his disciples at all. So among the fifty something monks in Qing Liang Temple, very few knew martial art. When he exchanged a move with Bayan just a moment ago, he sensed that Bayan’s left hand claw, the ‘bird’s claw skill’, was indeed very formidable. And then he heard Huangfu Ge’s loud and clear voice in demonstrating his profound internal energy, it was indeed no small matter. Even without the several hundred people outside the temple, just these two martial art masters were already very difficult to resist.

Seeing he hesitating without saying anything, Huangfu Ge laughed and said, “Even if in Qing Liang Temple there are really several good-looking women, letting everybody admire them is indeed a treat for the eyes.” His words were extremely frivolous, he did not show the least bit of consideration toward Cheng Guang’s feeling.

Xinxi laughed and said, “Abbot Shixiong, if that’s the case, why don’t you let this Great Lama searching your temple?” While saying that, he had a smirk on his face.

Preceding the others, Bayan walked toward the rear hall in big strides. Cheng Guang thought that the opposite party had come fully prepared, even if he could block Bayan and Huangfu Ge, he could not possibly stop the people they brought along. If a tangled battle ensued, Qing Liang Temple would suffer a great misfortune. In that instant his mind was in a whirl, he heaved a deep sigh, and could only watch helplessly as Bayan and about a dozen of his men entered the inner hall; with no other choice, he followed them in.

Bayan, Xinxi and Huangfu Ge talked among themselves in low voices, while their men were entering and searching the temple buildings and the monks’ residence one by one. Without their Abbot’s order, the monks of Qing Liang Temple could only glower at these men, without trying to block them at all.

Wei Xiaobao and Shuang’er were following behind Abbot Cheng Guang. They noticed that the sleeve of his monk robe was continuously trembling, obviously in his heart he was extremely angry.

Suddenly from the monks’ residence in the western wing they heard someone loudly called out, “Is it him?”

Huangfu Ge rushed toward the voice, two men grabbing a middle-aged monk came out. This monk was approximately forty-some years old, and had a thin face, he said, “Why are you grabbing me?”

Huangfu Ge shook his head. The two men laughed and said, “Please forgive our offense!” and released the monk.

Wei Xiaobao’s mind was as bright as snow: these men were looking for Emperor Shunzhi, there was no doubt about it.

With a cold laugh Cheng Guang said, “So you think this monk of our temple is the young lama of the Seat of Living Buddha?”

Huangfu Ge did not respond; he saw his men were dragging another middle-aged monk out. He looked at the monk’s face and shook his head.

“So you know Emperor Shunzhi,” Wei Xiaobao mused, “If this searching continues, sooner or later they will find Emperor Shunzhi. He is the young emperor’s father, I will have to think of a way to protect him.” But the opponent had many men and great force; how he was going to protect him, he did not have the slightest idea.

Several dozen people had already searched to a small vihara at the northeastern side of the monastery. Seeing the door to the courtyard was tightly closed, they called out, “Open the door, open the door!”

Cheng Guang said, “This is where a senior monk of our temple lives in seclusion; he has been here for seven years, you must not disturb his peace.”

Xinxi said with a laugh, “This time people from the outside are getting in, it’s not that the monk who shut himself down cannot endure it and thus trying to get out on his own account. What’s the big deal about it?”

A big and tall lama called out, “Why doesn’t anybody open the door? Most probably he is in here!” Lifting up his foot, he kicked the door.

Cheng Guang’s shadow flashed, he had already blocked in front of the lama. The lama was unable to hold back the momentum, his right foot flew and hit Cheng Guang’s lower abdomen. ‘Crack!’ the lama’s leg bones were broken and he tumbled backwards.

Bayan let out a strange ‘wah, wah’ shout; his left hand flew forward, his right hand made a half circle backward, both were in the shape of a claw, clawing toward Cheng Guang. Cheng Guang stood in front of the gate. ‘Whoosh, whoosh!’ he sent out two palm strikes to counter Bayan’s claws.

“Good! Wisdom Palm!” Huangfu Ge called out. A finger of his left hand went out, a gust of strong wind assaulted Cheng Guang’s face. Cheng Guang sidestepped to the left, ‘Slap!’ the strong wind struck the wooden gate.

Using the Wisdom Palm, Cheng Guang focused his attention on the battle. Bayan and Huangfu Ge launched a converging attack from left and right. Cheng Guang moved very slow, one by one he launched a series of palm attacks, seemingly without any power, but the palm created faint gusts of wind, evidently his own power was quite profound. Bayan and Huangfu Ge’s several dozen men cheered and shouted to boost these two men’s spirit. Bayan launched several fierce attacks, but all were neutralized by Cheng Guang’s palm strength.

Bayan grew impatient; increasing the speed of his attacks, he suddenly grunted, his left hand rose up, his several dozen white beards floated down, he managed to catch Cheng Guang’s beards, but his right shoulder was hit by Cheng Guang’s palm. At first he did not feel anything strange, but gradually his right arm grew heavier and heavier, it became difficult for him to raise his right hand. Suddenly he let out a roar and dodged sideways. With raised steel sabers, four lamas charged toward Cheng Guang. Cheng Guang’s leg flew up and kicked two men, his left palm struck out and landed on the third lama’s chest. “Ah!” the lama cried out loudly, and leaped back. Right this moment, the fourth lama’s saber hacked down. Cheng Guang used his sleeve to brush it away, and then the sleeve continued to coil around the lama’s wrist. He saw Bayan’s was charging forward with one hand up, the other hand down. Cheng Guang moved to the right to evade, but suddenly he felt a strong wind attacked his body. “Not good!” he groaned inwardly; swiftly he sent out a palm strike, but suddenly he felt a sharp pain on his right cheek, he was stabbed by Huangfu Ge’s finger. Although his own palm had hit Huangfu Ge’s arm, it failed to break Huangfu Ge’s arm bone.

Seeing Cheng Guang’s right cheek was bleeding, Shuang’er said in a low voice, “Must I help him?”

“Wait a moment,” Wei Xiaobao replied. His main purpose was to find Emperor Shunzhi, supposing Shuang’er joined the fray to drive everybody out, they would still be unable to find the old emperor. Much less the opponent had many men with great force, with sabers and spears, while Shuang’er was a little girl, how could she fight these many big men?

In the meantime, the Qing Liang Temple’s monks had seen their Abbot being trapped, they picked clubs and sticks of firewood and charged forward to help him fighting. But these monks did not know martial arts, as soon as they came up, their heads were broken and their blood flowing.

“Everybody stop fighting!” Cheng Guang called out.

Bayan bellowed, “Everybody kill at will!” The lamas were encouraged not to show mercy at all, in an instant four Qing Liang Temple’s monk were chopped down that their heads separated from their bodies.

Seeing the viciousness of the enemy in killing people, the rest of the monks did not dare to join the fight, they only stood far away, shouting and yelling. Cheng Guang slightly lost his concentration, and was hit by Huangfu Ge’s finger again. The finger was hitting the right side of his chest.

Huangfu Ge laughed and said, “Shaolin Pai’s Wisdom Palm is only so-so. Isn’t the Great Monk going to surrender?”

“Amitabha Buddha,” Cheng Guang said, “Benefactor’s sin is not small at all.”

Suddenly two lamas dropped down and rolled on the ground while brandishing their sabers, trying to chop his legs. Cheng Guang lifted up his leg and kicked, but there was a severe pain on his chest, his vision darkened, his leg only went halfway and he was unable to continue the kick. In his daze he swiped his left palm down. As soon as the palm touched the two lamas’ head, both of them fainted immediately.

“Dead bald donkey!” Bayan cursed. Both hands swiftly reached forward, his ten fingers grabbed Cheng Guang’s left leg. Cheng Guang was unable to stand, he collapsed to the ground. Huangfu Ge repeatedly moved his finger to seal Cheng Guang’s acupoints one by one.

Bayan laughed aloud; with his right foot he kicked the wooden gate. ‘Crack!’ the gate flew in. Bayan said with a laugh, “Come out quickly, let everybody see your appearance.”

The vihara was pitch-black and was completely quiet. “Get him out for me,” Bayan said. Two lamas responded together, they rushed into the building.

Author’s note: The word ‘easy’ (or convenient) in this chapter’s title is a Buddhist term meaning ‘expedient/practical method’. When expounding the Buddhist teaching, Sakyamuni (Siddharta Gautama) sensed that his teaching was not easily understood, therefore, he used a lot of ‘example’ to enlighten his disciples.

---

[1] Fashi means ‘one who has mastered the sutras’.

[2] Here we have ‘jushi’ again (see also Chapter 9, and the discussion surrounding it), lit. “resident scholar’.

[3] Hushuo Badao means rubbish/nonsense, with the character ‘ba’ means ‘eight’. Literal translation is: random talk eight ways. Jiudao means ‘nine ways’.

[foxs]

Chapter 18 - Vajra's treasured pestle protecting the Emperor, engraved seal script on stone tablet knocking down the Toutuo[1].
(Translated by Foxs)

LuDingJi-18.jpg

Fat Toutuo grabbed Wei Xiaobao’s arm and pulled him out in front of the stone tablet. Wei Xiaobao randomly said that the eight copies of the sutra were separately hidden in some mountain some temple; he also said that the stone tablet also mention the Divine Dragon Cult’s Cult Leader’s name.

[1] Vajra/vajrapani, Buddha's warrior attendant. Toutuo, Buddhist monk who do not shave his head.

[foxs]

Suddenly a golden ray flashed at the doorway, a large golden pestle came out from the vihara. 'Bonk, bonk' it struck the two lamas' heads. Immediately the golden pestle withdrew. Without making any sound the two lamas fell down, dead, at the doorway, their brains burst.

This unforeseen event was greatly outside everybody's anticipation. Bayan cursed in loud voice. Three more lamas charged toward the door. This time they were prepared, they all brandished their sabers to protect their heads. The first lama had just stepped into the door, the golden pestle struck down, even the saber was knocked down, together the golden pestle and the saber struck the lama's head. With all his might the second lama raised his saber to block, but it was as if the golden pestle went down with a force of thousand catties, unexpectedly the saber failed completely in blocking the golden pestle. 'Bonk!' the lama's skull was crushed. The third lama was so scared that his countenance looked like clay. His saber fell down, he turned around and fled.

Bayan opened his mouth, cursing and swearing, but he did not dare to personally attack the door. Huangfu Ge called out, "Get on the roof, take off the roof tiles and throw them inside." Immediately four men jumped onto the roof, took off the tiles, and threw the tiles inside through the hole on the roof. Huangfu Ge called out again, "Throw sand and stoned into the building." Following his order, the men under his command picked up sand and stones from the ground and threw it into the vihara through the wooden gate.

Most of the sand and stones going through the door was hit by the man inside the building using the golden pestle so that it flew back outside, but one by one all the tiles from the roof fell down. This way, no matter how high the person inside the building's martial art skill was, he would not be able to protect himself. Suddenly, a bellow like a mad ox was heard, a big and tall monk strode out of the building, carrying another monk in his left hand, and turning the golden pestle in his right hand like a wheel. This huge monk was at least half a head taller than ordinary man. His stature was impressive, just like a deity. Swinging the golden pestle in his hand so that it created flashing yellow light, he roared, "Are you all bored of being alive?" His face was purplish red, with short beard that looked like a clump of wild grass. His monk robe was tattered, the holes on his robe exposed his sinewy muscles, his arms were bulging and his waist thick, his hands and feet were big. Seeing this kind of awe-inspiring man, Huangfu Ge, Bayan, and the others could not help but retreated a few steps backwards.

Bayan called out, “This bald thief is only one man, what are you afraid of? Let’s attack together!”

Huangfu Ge called out, “Everybody be careful, don’t harm the monk by his side.”

Everybody turned their attention to the monk. He was approximately thirty something, tall and slim, his face looked handsome and elegant. He was looking down, as if he did not consider the situation around him was worthy to be looked at with one eye.Wei Xiaobao’s heart jumped, he thought it over, “This man must be the young emperor’s papa, it’s just that their appearances are not the same. He is lot more handsome than the young emperor. Turns out he is still this young.”

Right this moment, about a dozen lamas attacked the giant monk together. The giant lama brandished his golden pestle. Endless ‘bonk, bonk, bonk!’ was heard, each ‘bonk’ resulted in one lama fell down to the ground, struck dead by the pestle.

Huangfu Ge ran his hand over his waist and pulled out a flexible whip. From the hand of a lama subordinate of his, Bayan snatched a weapon, which was a pair of short iron hammers. The two of them attacked together from left and right. Huangfu Ge’s flexible whip trembled, the tip of his whip coiled horizontally, ‘shua!’ it left a mark on the giant monk’s neck.

“Wah, wah!” the monk let out an unintelligible cry, while swinging his pestle to strike Bayan. Bayan raised his pair of hammers to block. There was a loud ‘Clang!’ Bayan’s arms went numb, the pair of hammers fell off his hands. But the monk’s shoulder was hit by the flexible whip again. Now everybody could see clearly that the monk only possessed extraordinary strength, but his martial art skill was only mediocre.

One lama sneaked in and grabbed the middle-aged monk’s left arm. The monk grunted, but he did not try to struggle at all. In a low voice Wei Xiaobao said “Protect that monk.”

“Yes,” Shuang’er replied. Her shadow flashed, she stretched out her hand to jab the lama’s waist, the lama blocked with his finger. She turned around and stretched out her finger in a feign attack toward Huangfu Ge’s face. Huangfu Ge turned to the right to evade, she quickly turned around and pierced the pit of Bayan’s stomach with her finger.

“Mother …” Bayan cursed and fell face up.

Shuang’er turned to the east and circled to the west, her tender hands fluttered, more than a dozen men that Bayan and Huangfu Ge’s brought along fell down one after another. Xinxi called out, “Hey, hey, young … young benefactor …”

Shuang’er laughed and said, “Hey, hey, old monk!” Stretching out her finger, she pierced his waist.

Huangfu Ge flicked his flexible whip to protect his front, back, left and right. ‘Whoosh, whoosh!’ the whip created whistling wind in a circle about a zhang in diameter; it was so tight that not even water would be able to penetrate. Shuang’er circled around outside the whip’s circumference. Huangfu Ge’s whip moved faster and faster, several times the whip almost struck Shuang’er’s body, but she was always able to evade with her fast and nimble movement.

“Good kid!” Huangfu Ge called out. Sending his power to the whip, the flexible whip turned into a long spear, it went straight toward the pit of Shuang’er’s stomach. Shuang’er’s feet slipped and she fell forward, her finger extended toward Huangfu Ge’s lower abdomen. Huangfu Ge raised his left palm to block her piercing finger, followed by a flick of his flexible whip that the tip of his whip coiled back to strike Shuang’er’ back. Shuang’er dropped drown and rolled away; her position was rather awkward.

Seeing Shuang'er was in a disadvantageous situation, Wei Xiaobao was very anxious. He bent down to grab some dirt to be thrown onto Huangfu Ge's eyes, but the ground was swept very clean, he could not even grab a handful of dirt. Shuang'er had not stood up, Huangfu Ge's flexible whip had already shot down toward her. "Stop fighting!" Wei Xiaobao called out. Brandishing his golden pestle the giant monk rushed forward to help. Suddenly Shuang'er's right hand grabbed the tip of the flexible whip. Huangfu Ge exerted his strength to jerk the whip up, bringing Shuang'er's body along with it, and throwing her into the air.

Wei Xiaobao reached into his bosom, without caring what kind of stuff he got, he simply grabbed it and threw it onto Huangfu Ge's face. Pieces of white paper fluttered in the air, several dozen sheets of paper obstructed Huangfu Ge's vision. Huangfu Ge busily stretched out his hand to brush the paper away, the power in his right hand diminished instantly. Right this moment, the giant monk's golden pestle was also coming down on the top of his head. Huangfu Ge was greatly shocked, hastily he ducked down. Shuang'er's body was still in the air, without waiting her feet to touch the ground, her left foot kicked toward his head and hit the taiyang [sun] acupoint on Huangfu Ge's head.

"Aiyo!" he cried out and fell backward. 'Bang!' sparks flew everywhere as the golden pestle struck the ground, less than half a chi from his head. As soon as Shuang'er's right foot landed on the ground, she snatched the flexible whip from his hand.

"Good skill!" Wei Xiaobao cheered. Pulling his dagger, he rushed forward and held it in front of Huangfu Ge's left eye. "Tell your men to get out," he shouted, "No one is allowed to come in!"

Huangfu Ge was unable to move; feeling the thick cold air of the dagger on his face he was greatly amazed. "All of you get out," he called out, "Tell everybody no one is allowed to come in." His several dozen men hesitated for half a day. Wei Xiaobao made a move as if he was going to thrust his dagger to kill, the men immediately rushed out of the temple.

The giant monk opened his round eyes wide, he gazed at Shuang'er for half a day. "Hey," he said, "Good child!" Picking up the golden pestle with his left hand and supporting the middle-aged monk, he walked back into the vihara.

Wei Xiaobao rushed two steps forward, he wanted to talk to the middle-aged monk, but he was too late. Shuang'er went toward Cheng Guang and unsealed his acupoints, saying, "These bad eggs are violent, vicious and overbearing, they offended the Great Monk."

Cheng Guang stood up, put his palms together and said, "Young benefactor's body and mind possess supreme feat, you have saved my temple from great catastrophe. Lao Na has the blurred vision of an old person, I did not recognize an expert, and thus has failed miserably to show respect."

"No, you have not," Shuang'er replied, "All along you were very polite toward our young master."

Only after calming himself down did Wei Xiaobao realize that the paper he tossed onto Huangfu Ge's face and blurred his vision was actually a big wad of banknotes. He laughed aloud and said, "Those who see banknotes and not surrender, perhaps only a few in this world. I attacked using several tens of thousands taels, you simply can't not cry out 'surrender'." Giggling, Shuang'er picked up the scattered banknotes and returned them to Wei Xiaobao.

"Wei Gongzi [young master]," Cheng Guang asked, "How should we deal with the situation here?"

Wei Xiaobao laughed and said, "These three friends, tell your men to disperse!"

Immediately Huangfu Ge raised his voice, "All of you, go down the mountain and wait for me there." They heard several hundred men outside complied together, followed by the rustling noise of footsteps, in an instant they have all left.

Cheng Guang was relieved. He reached down to unseal Xinxi's acupoint. "Abbot, hold on," Wei Xiaobao said, "I want to talk to you first."

"Yes!" Cheng Guang replied, "But these several Shixiong have had their acupoints sealed for quite a long time, their hands and feet are numb, I must unseal their acupoints first."

"It won't do any harm to leave them for a while," Wei Xiaobao said, "Let's go to that hall over there and sit down."

Cheng Guang nodded. "Yes," he said. Turning to Xinxi, he said, "Shixiong, please don't be impatient, I will be back shortly to unseal your acupoints." Taking Wei Xiaobao along, he went to the Buddhist hall on the west.

"Abbot," Wei Xiaobao said, "Are these people really here to look for the young lama?" Cheng Guang was at a loss for words, he was unable to answer. Wei Xiaobao leaned forward and whispered in his ear, "I know that they are here for that Emperor Monk."

Cheng Guang's body trembled. He nodded slowly. "Turns out the young benefactor has already known," he said.

In a low voice Wei Xiaobao continued, "I came to your precious monastery, performing repentance ritual and Buddhist ceremony was a fake reason, actually I receive ... receive an order to protect the Emperor Monk."

Cheng Guang nodded. "I see," he said, "Lao Na has already suspected as much. Young benefactor was rushing to Qing Liang Temple, your manner did not look like someone desiring to perform a Buddhist ceremony."

Wei Xiaobao said, "Although we have captured Huangfu Ge, Bayan, and the other, it's like capturing a tiger is easy, letting the tiger go is difficult. Even if we take the trouble of letting them go, in just a few days they would return to nag at us endlessly; it will be very troublesome!"

"But we must not kill them," Cheng Guang said, "There have been quite a number of people losing their lives in this temple today. Ay, Amitabha Buddha, Amitabha Buddha."

"Killing them would be useless," Wei Xiaobao said, "How about this: tell your men to tie them up. We will investigate carefully: why did they come to look for the Emperor Monk?"

Cheng Guang was reluctant. "This is a peaceful Buddhist establishment," he said, "We, who have left home, secretly tie up people and interrogate them, it does not seem reasonable."

"What do you mean unreasonable?" Wei Xiaobao asked, "They came here and killed the monks in your temple, are you saying they are being reasonable? If we do not investigate clearly and think of a way to deal with them, and then they come back to kill, to set your Qing Liang Temple on fire, what should we do?"

Cheng Guang thought for a while, then he nodded and said, "That sounds reasonable. Let it be as Benefactor instructed." He clapped his hands to summon a monk, and ordered him, "Please invite that Mr. Huangfu here, we have something we'd like to consult with him."

Wei Xiaobao said, "This Huangfu Ge is very crafty, I am afraid we can't find anything from him. Let us ask that Great Lama first."

"Right, right," Cheng Guang said, "Why didn't I think about it earlier?"

Two monks dragged Bayan into the hall, they were angry at him for killing the monks of their temple, hence they threw him heavily on the floor. "Ay," Cheng Guang said, "How come you do not have any manners toward the Great Lama?"

"Yes!" the two monks replied, and withdrew out of the hall.

Wei Xiaobao lifted a chair with his left hand, and then with the dagger in his right hand, he scraped layer after layer off the chair's leg. The dagger was incomparably sharp, slice by slice the chair's leg was cut away, until it was only about a tenth or a twentieth of its original thickness, just like peeling a fruit. Cheng Guang watched with eyes opened wide, he did not understand Wei Xiaobao's intention.

Wei Xiaobao put down the chair, and walked toward Bayan. He ran his left hand over Bayan's head, and raised the dagger in his right hand, making a scraping motion just like scraping away the chair's leg just a moment ago.

"Don't!" Bayan cried out.

Cheng Guang also shouted, "You can't do that!"

"What do you mean I can't do that?" Wei Xiaobao said angrily, "I know all Tibetan Great Lamas are trained in some kind of iron head skill, saber and spear won't penetrate their heads. When I was in Beijing, I have personally used this dagger to scrape a Great Lama's head, I spent half a day and I could not cut him down. Great Lama, are you a genuine goods at fair prices, or are you a fake article? If I do not test you, how am I going to find out?"

Bayan hastily said, "I have never trained that iron head skill, if you scrape my head, I'll die."

"Not necessarily," Wei Xiaobao said, "If I cut you two or three cun, you might not necessarily die. Let me scrape only a layer of your skull, just until I can see your brains. If you are telling the truth, your brain will be motionless, but if you lie, your brain will boil endlessly, just like vegetable boiled in water. I have something to ask you, if I don't scrape open your brain, how do I know if you are telling the truth or a lie?"

"Don't scrape, don't scrape," Bayan said, "I will tell you the truth."

Wei Xiaobao ran his hand over Bayan's scalp and said, "The truth or a lie, how do I know?"

"If I don't tell you the truth," Bayan said, "It won't be too late for you to scrape my scalp then."

Wei Xiaobao thought for a moment and said, "Very well, let me ask you this: who told you to come to Qing Liang Temple?"

"It was the Great Lama Sheng Luo Tuo of Pusa Ding Zhen Rong Yuan [lit. courtyard of the genuine appearance of the crown of Bodhisattva’s head] who sent me here,” Bayan replied.

“Amitabha Buddha,” Cheng Guang said, “The green and yellow temples of Mount Wutai have never had any hatred or desire for revenge, how can the Great Lama of Pusa Ding send you here to create trouble?”

“I did not come to create trouble,” Bayan said, “Sheng Luo Tuo Shixiong asked me to look for a monk in his thirties; he told me this monk had stolen the treasured scripture of our Living Buddha in Lhasa, and went into hiding in Qing Liang Temple, thus we must find and arrest him.”

“Amitabha Buddha,” Cheng Guang said, “How can there be such thing?”

Wei Xiaobao raised his dagger and shouted, “You are lying, I am going to scrape open your scalp and look at your brain.”

[foxs]

“I am not, I am not lying,” Bayan cried out, “If you don’t believe me, go ask Sheng Luo Tuo Shixiong. He told us to pretend that we are looking for a young lama, but actually we are looking for that middle-aged monk. He also said that that Mr. Huangfu knew this monk, so he asked him to accompany us looking for this monk. Sheng Luo Tuo Shixiong said that this monk has stolen our secret Tibetan Tantra Scripture, ‘Da Pi Lu Zhe Na Fo Shen Bian Jia Chi Jing’ [I won’t bother translating this, I think it is a transliteration of some Sanskrit words; if anybody can help me, that would be great]; it’s not a small matter at all. If I managed to get hold of this monk, I will perform a great service, when I return to Lhasa, the Living Buddha will certainly reward me heavily.”

Wei Xiaobao saw his expression looked sincere, it did not appear to be fake at all, so he assumed Bayan was also being deceived by others, who did not want him to know the truth about Shunzhi. Thereupon he took out the Tibetan letter he snatched away from the three Tibetan lamas Shuang’er had caught. He opened it up and said, “Read it for me, tell me what it says.” While saying that, he placed the blade of his dagger flat on the top of Bayan’s head.

[Translator’s note: since in the 3^rd edition Wei Xiaobao had never met the three lamas, all reference to the letter is gone. All information still exist, it’s just that Bayan told him that the information was ‘according to his Sheng Luo Tuo Shixiong’.]

“Yes, yes!” Bayan said, and then he uttered some gibberish as he read the letter.

Wei Xiaobao nodded. “Not bad,” he said, “You read very well, you did not miss a single word. But this Fangzhang Dashi does not understand Tibetan, please translate the letter into Chinese for him.”

Bayan said, “The letter says, this big … big personality is indeed in the Qing Liang Temple of Mount Wutai. We recently received information that Shen … Shen Long Jiao is going to invite him, we must … must strike first and gain the upper hand.”

Hearing him mentioning ‘Shen Long Jiao’ three characters, Wei Xiaobao believed he was not lying. “What else does the letter say?” he asked.

Bayan said, “The letter says, going to Qing Liang Temple to invite this big personality is not difficult, but perhaps Shen Long Jiao has also received the information and is going to act; therefore, Sheng Luo Tuo Shixiong is asking Da He’er Shixiong of Beijing to hasten in sending a martial art master to come and render his assistance. If … if the Great Lama Sang Jie has arrived in Beijing, the Senior is unequalled in the present age, if he personally take charge of this matter, it will be … will be a ‘not one in ten thousand failures’ [wan shi wu yi] …”

Wei Xiaobao laughed and cursed, “Damn it! It’s ‘not one failure in ten thousand (matters)’ [wan wu yi shi – surefire, absolutely safe]. What do you mean ‘not one in ten thousand failures’?” That he was able to correct someone else’s mistake in Chinese expression, it was a ‘hard to meet in a thousand years’ opportunity, not one chance in ten thousand matters, thereupon he was very pleased with himself.

“Yes, yes,” Bayan said, “It’s one in ten thousand without failure [wan yi wu shi] …”

Wei Xiaobao laughed, “Your Lama Granny,” he said, “You’re still saying it wrong. What else?”

“Nothing else,” Bayan said, “There’s nothing else below that.”

“Damn it,” Wei Xiaobao cursed, “What do you mean there’s nothing else below that? Is it I don’t have anything else down below, or is it you don’t have anything else down below?”

“We all … we all don’t have anything else down below,” Bayan replied.

“What do you mean we all don’t have anything else down below?” Wei Xiaobao asked.

“There are no more letters below that,” Bayan replied.

Wei Xiaobao burst into loud laughter. He asked, “What kind of man is that Huangfu Ge?”

“He is the helper that Sheng Luo Tuo Shixiong invited,” Bayan replied, “He arrived only last night.”

Wei Xiaobao nodded. He turned to Cheng Guang and said, “Abbot, I want to examine that fat monk from the Fo Guang Temple. If you don’t feel comfortable, there is no harm in you listening from outside the window.”

“That would be best, that would best,” Cheng Guang said. He ordered Bayan to be taken out and Xinxi to be brought in, while he himself returned to the meditation room, he was not willing to listen from outside the window.

As he entered the room, Xinxi's face was all smiles as he said, "Two benefactors are young, yet your martial art skill is superb. Lao Na has neither seen nor heard about it. Young heroes, really amazing, amazing!"

"F*ck your granny," Wei Xiaobao cursed, "Who needs your boot-licking?" And he kicked Xinxi's buttocks.

Although Xinxi was in pain, his smile did not diminish; he said, "Yes, yes, all real heroes and warriors definitely do not like to hear boot-licking. But the old monk is being sincere, it can't be considered as boot-licking."

"Let me ask you," Wei Xiaobao said, "You came to create havoc in Qing Liang Temple, who sent you here?"

"Since benefactor asks, the old monk does not dare to conceal anything from you," Xinxi replied, "The Great Lama Sheng Luo Tuo of Pusa Ding Zhen Rong Yuan sent two hundred taels for me, asking me to accompany his Shidi [younger martial brother] Bayan to come to Qing Liang Temple to look for ... look for someone. The old monk cannot receive a reward without deserving it, therefore, I was obliged to accompany him."

Wei Xiaobao kicked him again. "Rubbish!" he cursed, "You still think you can lie to me? Quickly tell me the truth."

"Yes, yes," Xinxi said, "I can't hide it from the benefactor, the Great Lama sent me three hundred taels."

"Obviously it was a thousand taels," Wei Xiaobao said.

"To tell you the truth, it was five hundred taels," Xinxi said, "If I received one more tael, the old monk is not a human."

"What kind of 'thing' is that Huangfu ge?" Wei Xiaobao asked.

Xinxi replied, "That son of a b1tch is not a good thing, it was that crafty lama Bayan who brought him along. As soon as benefactor let me go, the old monk will immediately take him to Wutai County; I will ask the County Head Magistrate to punish him properly. Qing Liang Temple is a peaceful and quiet Buddhist establishment, how can we allow him to commit outrages here? Young benefactor, those several lives, along with several perished lamas, we can push the blame on his head."

Wei Xiaobao's countenance sank, he said, "Clearly you killed them all, how can you push the blame on someone else's head?"

Xinxi beseeched him, "Good Young Master, please spare me."

Wei Xiaobao had him removed from the room, and had Huangfu Ge in to be interrogated. But this man was very tough, he refused to answer anything. He ignored Wei Xiaobao's intimidation with the dagger. When Shuang'er sealed his 'tian huo' acupoint, the pain was unbearable that he could not help but groaning, but he still refused to answer Wei Xiaobao's question. He simply said, "If you have guts, just stab your master dead with your dagger; torturing people is not a hero's conduct."

Wei Xiaobao respected him as a real man. "Alright," he said, "We won't torture you." He ordered Shuang'er to unseal his 'tian huo' acupoint.

After he had Huangfu Ge taken out of the room, he invited Cheng Guang back and said, "We must consult that big personality on how to conclude this matter."

Cheng Guang shook his head, "He is resolved not to see any outsider."

Enraged, Wei Xiaobao said, "What do you mean he does not want to see outsiders? Hasn't he seen outsiders just now? If we washed our hands and did not care, wouldn't he be taken away by outsiders? In just a few days, the Great Lama of Beijing will send someone else here, there will be some unequalled martial art masters, and then there will be some Shen Long [divine dragon] Jiao, Wugui [turtle] Jiao people. Even if we wanted to help, we would still be no match for that many people."

"You are right," Cheng Guang said.

"Go talk to him," Wei Xiaobao said, "The situation is urgent, we simply must come up with a way to deal with this problem."

Cheng Guang shook his head and said, "Lao Na has agreed that everyone in this temple, Lao Na included, will never talk to him."

"Alright," Wei Xiaobao said, "I am not a monk of your temple, I'll go and talk to him."

"You can't, you can't," Cheng Guang said, "As soon as young benefactor enters the vihara, his Shidi, that giant monk Xing Dian, may kill you with his pestle."

"He won't strike me dead," Wei Xiaobao said.

Cheng Guang cast a glance toward Shuang'er before saying, "Even if you send your honorable servant to deal with Monk Xing Dian, Xing Chi will still refuse to talk to you."

"Xing Chi?" Wei Xiaobao asked, "Is his Buddhist name Xing Chi?"

"Yes," Cheng Guang replied, "Turns out benefactor did not know it."

Wei Xiaobao sighed and said, "Since that's the case, there is nothing I can do. Since you don't have any ‘not one in ten thousand failures’ [wan shi wu yi] good plan, it's a pity that a nice ancient temple like Qing Liang Temple will be destroyed in your hands as the Abbot."

Cheng Guang frowned and showed deep concern on his face, he rubbed his hands repeatedly. Suddenly he said, "I'll go and ask Yulin Shixiong, perhaps he has a solution."

"And who is this Yulin Dashi?" Wei Xiaobao asked.

"He is Xing Chi's religious Shifu[1]," Cheng Guang replied.

"That's great," Wei Xiaobao delightedly said, "Take me to see this old monk."

Immediately Cheng Guang led Wei Xiaobao and Shuang'er out from the back door of Qing Liang Temple and walked about a li to a tiny old temple. There was no inscribed board above the temple's door. Cheng Guang walked straight in, and continued toward the meditation room at the back. They saw an old monk, with white hair and white eyebrows, sitting on a putuan [meditation mat]. His eyes were closed in meditation; he seemed to be completely oblivious of the three people who had just walked in.

Cheng Guang signaled them with his hand, and then he quietly sat down on another putuan at the side, lowered his head and closed his eyes, and put his palms together. Wei Xiaobao snickered inwardly; following his example, he also sat down. Shuang'er stood behind him. All around them was very quiet, it seemed that this old monk was the only one in this tiny temple.

After a long time, the old monk still had not moved a single jot, it was as if he was already dead. Unexpectedly, Cheng Guang also did not move at all. Wei Xiaobao's hands were numb and his legs ached, he was greatly impatient, he stood up and sat back down again, he sat down and stood back up again, while in his heart he cursed the old monk's eighteen ancestors several dozen times.

Then, after a long time, the old monk finally let out a deep breath and slowly opened his eyes. He was not surprised at all to see people in front of him, he simply nodded his head slightly.

Cheng Guang said, "Shixiong, Xing Chi's earthly karma has not been broken, some people came to the temple to look for him, I am asking Shixiong to resolve it according to the Dharma."

The old monk Yulin said, "All circumstances are born in the heart, the resolution is already inside."

Cheng Guang said, "The outside devils are heavy, Qing Liang Temple is in trouble." Thereupon he narrated how Xinxi, Bayan, Huangfu Ge, and the others had come to kidnap Xing Chi, fortunately Wei Xiaobao, master and servant, had lent their hands to save him. He also told him how several people from both sides had died, and how the enemy did not seem to be willing to let the matter drop. Yulin listened silently without making any sound, and then he closed his eyes again and went into meditation.

Wei Xiaobao was furious; suddenly he sprang up and shouted, "F*ck ..." But he only managed to utter one word, Cheng Guang repeatedly signaled him, asking him not to be angry, and asking him to sit down and wait. This time Yulin's meditation lasted less than an hour. Wei Xiaobao mused, "From among the big robbers and strong bandits, vixens and scoundrels of the world, no one is as annoying as this old monk."

After all the trouble, Yulin finally opened his eyes once again. He asked, "Benefactor Wei came from Beijing?"

"Yes," Wei Xiaobao replied.

"Benefactor Wei is working at His Majesty's side?" Yulin asked again.

Wei Xiaobao was shocked; he sprang up and said, "You ... you ... how did you know?"

"Lao Na is only guessing," Yulin replied.

Wei Xiaobao thought, "This old monk is of some demonic school, perhaps he really has some magical power." Thereupon he did not dare to curse him in his heart anymore; he sat back down obediently.

Yulin said, "His Majesty sent Benefactor Wei to see Xing Chi, what message do you have?"

Wei Xiaobao thought, "This old monk knows everything, it will be useless to hide the truth from him." Thereupon he said, "His Majesty learned that the Old Emperor is still in the world of the living, he is both delighted and sad, he sent me to kowtow and pay his respect to the Old Emperor. If ... if the Old Emperor is willing to return to the Palace and be his old self, nothing can be better than that." Actually, Kangxi said that after the truth was ascertained, he himself would go up Mount Wutai to have an audience with his Fu Huang [father emperor], but Wei Xiaobao kept this words and did not say it.

Yulin said, "His Majesty ordered benefactor to take what kind of token of confidence?"

From his innermost pocket Wei Xiaobao took out the edict Kangxi had written with his own hand, and presented it with both hands, saying, "Dashi, please look at this." The imperial edict said, “The Imperial Bodyguard Deputy Chief Wei Xiaobao, hereby being granted by the Emperor himself to wear Yellow Magua, is being sent to visit the Wutai Mountain region on official business. Various provinces’ civil and military officials are ordered to give assistance. By the Emperor himself.”

Yulin took the letter, read it, and returned it to Wei Xiaobao, saying, "Turns out it is the Imperial Bodyguard Deputy Chief Wei Daren, forgive me for failing to show respect."

In his heart Wei Xiaobao was very proud of himself, thinking, "Do you dare to despise me now?" But looking at Yulin's face, he did not see any respectful expression, his conceited heart immediately dissipated.

"Benefactor Wei," Yulin said, "In your opinion, how should we handle this matter?"

"I want to kowtow to the Old Emperor," Wei Xiaobao said, "And wait for the Old Emperor's instruction."

Yulin said, "Formerly, his riches reached the four seas, but after leaving home and become a monk, the earthly karma has already been severed. These three words 'lao huang ye' [Old Emperor] can no longer be mentioned, so as not to shock him and disturb his peaceful cultivation." Wei Xiaobao was silent without replying anything.

---

[1] Orig. 'chuanfa shifu' - master who pass on Buddhism doctrines to his disciples.

[foxs]

Yulin continued, "Please go back and report to His Majesty, Xing Chi is not willing to see you, he is also unwilling to see any outsider."

"His Majesty is his son," Wei Xiaobao said, "He is not an outsider."

"Why is it called 'leave home'?" Yulin said, "It's because home is no longer home, wife and children are outsiders."

Wei Xiaobao thought, "Apparently it is you, the old monk, who is playing trick, always stand on the way. Even if the Old Emperor is unwilling to return to the Palace, he might not necessarily be unwilling to see his own son." He said, "Since that's the case, I will dispatch men and horses to go up Mount Wutai to guard and protect, we must not let idle people to enter the temple and create disturbance."

Yulin showed a faint smile as he said, "This way, Qing Liang Temple will turn into an inner courtyard of the Palace, or a government office; the Imperial Bodyguard Deputy Chief Wei Daren becomes a messenger at the Qing Liang Temple. To be blunt with you, if that's the case, Xing Chi might as well return to the Palace in Beijing."

"So Dashi has another great idea to protect the Old ... the Senior," Wei Xiaobao said, "Zaixia will ... will listen with respectful attention."

Yulin smiled and said, "Benefactor Wei is so young, yet has such an awesome background, no wonder that at your teenage year you have already occupied such a high-ranking post." He paused for a moment, and then continued, "Great idea, that I do not have, those who have left home stand aloof from worldly affair, we resign ourselves to adversity. Thank you very much for Benefactor Wei's kind intention, if Qing Liang Temple is really facing a misfortune, we'll leave it to fate to escape from calamity." Finished speaking, he put his palms together to salute, closed his eyes, and went back to meditation.

Cheng Guang stood up, signaled with his hand, and withdrew toward the door, where he bowed with palms together toward Yulin. Wei Xiaobao made faces toward Yulin, stuck out his tongue, put the thumb of his right hand on his own nose, with the other four fingers waving toward Yulin. With this gesture he was saying, "What a stink, what a stink!" Yulin had his eyes closed, he did not see anything.

When the three of them were outside, Cheng Guang said, "Yulin Dashi is an eminent senior monk, he has reached the enlightenment level. Lao Na is going to release Abbot Xinxi and the others and let them go. Benefactor Wei, our meeting today is brought together by fate, let us part here." Finished speaking, he brought his palms together, bowed to salute, and left. Unexpectedly he did not let Wei Xiaobao to re-enter Qing Liang Temple.

Wei Xiaobao's heart was on fire; he said, "Very well, since you already have a brilliant scheme that is ‘not one in ten thousand failures’ (wan shi wu yi), it's actually me who was being meddlesome."

He told Shuang'er to fetch Yu Ba and his retinue, and then without telling anybody else they went down the mountain, back to Ling Jing Temple to spend the night there.

The previous night he had donated seventy taels of silver to the Ling Jing Temple. When the administrator of the monastery saw the big benefactor once again graced their temple with his visit, he eagerly and attentively welcomed them.

In the guestroom, with one hand supporting his cheek, Wei Xiaobao contemplated, “I have seen the Old Emperor. Turns out he is not that old, but he is in a very dangerous situation; the Tibetan Lamas want to capture him, the Shen Long Jiao also want to get him. That old bald thief Yulin is putting on an act, but does not have the least bit of farting skill; what good is Abbot Cheng Guang one man alone? I am afraid in just a few days the Old Emperor will be captured by those people, and then how am I going to explain to Xiao Xuanzi?”

As he turned his head around, he saw Shuang’er’s beautiful eyebrows were furrowed, she looked really upset. “Shuang’er,” he asked, “Why are you unhappy?”

“Nothing,” Shuang’er replied.

“I know you have a load on your mind,” Wei Xiaobao said, “Quickly tell me.”

“It’s really nothing,” Shuang’er replied.

Suddenly Wei Xiaobao remembered something. “Ah, I get it,” he said, “You are blaming me for being an official in the Imperial Court, but all along have never told you.”

Shuang’er’s eyes turned red as she said, “The Tatar Emperor is a big evil man, Xianggong you … how can you be their official? Not only that, you are a high-ranking official.” While saying that, tears streaming down her cheeks.

Wei Xiaobao was taken aback. “Silly child,” he said, “Why do you have to cry over that?”

Sobbing and sniffling, Shuang’er said, “The Third Mistress has given me to Xianggong, she told me to serve you, to obey your commands. But … but you are a … a high-ranking official in the Imperial Court, my papa, mama, and two gege [older brother], were all killed by evil government officials. You … you …” And she burst out crying.

Momentarily Wei Xiaobao was at a loss of what to do. “Alright, alright!” he hastily said, “I will tell you everything. Let me tell you the truth, my position as a government official is only a cover, I am the Xiangzhu of Green Wood Hall of Tian Di Hui, the Heaven is my father, the Earth is my mother, we fight the Qing to restore the Ming. Do you understand? My Shifu is Tian Di Hui’s Zongduozhu, I have already told your Third Mistress everything. Our Tian Di Hui stand to oppose the Imperial Court. My Shifu sent me to infiltrate the Imperial Palace to become an officer, for the purpose of spying on the Tatars’ movement. This is top secret information, if this info leaks out, my life cannot be protected anymore.”

Shuang’er reached out and pressed his hand against Wei Xiaobao’s lips. “Don’t say anything anymore,” she said in a low voice, “It’s all my fault, I forced you to tell me.” While saying that, her tears were turned into laughter. She continued, “Xianggong is a good man, naturally you can’t possibly do bad things. I … I really am a silly servant girl.”

Wei Xiaobao laughed and said, “You are a well-behaved girl.” Pulling her hand, he let her sit on the kang, by his side. In a low voice he told her everything about Shunzhi and Kangxi. He said, “The young emperor is only a teenager, his father has left home to become a Buddhist monk and no longer wants to be with him. Don’t you think we should pity him? Those fellows who came to get him today were all very, very bad people, how fortunate it was that you saved him.”

Shuang’er let out a breath and said, “Finally I did a good thing.”

Wei Xiaobao said, “No more than sending the Buddha onto the Western Paradise. Those people were released by the Abbot. Definitely they are not going to let go, they will come back to get that old emperor, cut the flesh of his body piece by piece, cook it, and eat it; won’t that be terrible?” He knew Shuang’er had a good heart, in order to arouse her courage so that she would be willing to save people, he intentionally pictured Shunzhi’s plight to be utterly dire.

Shuang’er shivered; “Why would they want to eat his flesh?” she asked.

Wei Xiaobao said, “Monk Tangseng[1] went to the Western Paradise to fetch the scriptures; have you heard this tale?”

“I have,” Shuang’er replied, “And there were Sun Wukong and Zhu Bajie[2] too.”

“Along the way, they met many demons,” Wei Xiaobao said, “They all wanted to eat Tangseng’s flesh; they said he was a holy monk, if they ate his flesh, they would become Buddhist immortal.”

“Ah, I know,” Shuang’er said, “These bad people thought that the Old Emperor is also a holy monk.”

“That’s right,” Wei Xiaobao said, “You are really smart. The Old Emperor Monk can be compared to Tangseng, and those bad people are the demons. I am the monkey Sun, Sun Xingzhe [another name for Sun Wukong], and you are … you are …” Speaking to this point, he raised his palms to cover his own ears, because right that moment, a slap was coming to his face.

Shuang’er laughed and said, “You are saying I am the Zhu Bajie?”

Wei Xiaobao said, “Your appearance looks like Guanyin Pusa [Goddess of Mercy], but your action looks like Zhu Bajie.”

Shuang’er quickly waved her hand, “Don’t say anything to offend the Bodhisattva,” she said, “Xianggong, you may be the Shancai Boy Hong Hai’er[3] by the Guanyin Pusa’s side, and I …” Speaking to this point, her face blushed, she did not continue whatever she was going to say next.

“That’s right!” Wei Xiaobao said, “I can be the Shancai Boy, and you are the Long Nu [dragon girl]. The two of us will always be together, and whatever happens we will never part.”

Shuang’er’s cheeks blushed even deeper, she said in a low voice, “Naturally I will serve you forever, unless … unless you don’t want me anymore, and drive me away.”

Wei Xiaobao raised his palm to make a cutting gesture across his own neck and said, “Even if you cut my head, I will never drive you away. Unless you don’t want me anymore, and sneak out on your own.”

Shuang’er also raised her palm to make a cutting gesture across her own neck and said, “Even if you cut my head, I will never leave.” The two of them burst out in loud laughter.

Ever since Shuang’er followed Wei Xiaobao, she had always observed master-servant relationship strictly, very little did she ever chat and laugh with him. This moment, after listening to Wei Xiaobao telling her the truth about him, her heart felt happy and at ease. By laughing together like this, the friendship between them grew several degrees more intimate.

“Alright,” Wei Xiaobao said, “Now that the problem between us is sorted out, we have to think of a way, how are we going to save Tangseng?”

Shuang’er laughed and said, “To save Monk Tangseng, the Great Sage the Equal of Heaven[4] had always come up with an idea, Zhu Bajie was only a bum beetle.”

Wei Xiaobao laughed and said, “If Zhu Bajie was as good-looking as you are, Tangseng would never leave home to become a Buddhist monk.”

“Why is that?” Shuang’er asked.

Wei Xiaobao replied, “Naturally Tangseng would take Zhu Bajie as his wife.”

‘Pfft,’ Shuang’er broke into laughter. “Zhu Bajie was a pig demon, who would want to take him as a wife?”

Hearing Shuang’er mentioning taking a pig demon as a wife, Wei Xiaobao suddenly remembered the ‘huadiao fuling’ pig, in which Mu Jianping came to him; he wondered where she and Fang Yi were right this moment, and whether she was safe and sound. Seeing Wei Xiaobao was staring blankly, lost in thought, Shuang’er did not dare to interrupt his train of thought.

A moment later, Wei Xiaobao said, “I have found a way not to let those bad people catch the Old Emperor. Shuang’er, if, for example, there is a similar treasure, and a lot of thieves and bandits want to steal it, what should we do, so that those thieves and bandits cannot steal it?”

Shuang’er replied, “When we see thieves and bandits come to steal it, we capture them.”

Wei Xiaobao shook his head, “The thieves and bandits are too many, we cannot catch them all. We must become thieves and bandits ourselves.”

“We become thieves and bandits?” Shuang’er asked.

“Right!” Wei Xiaobao said, “We strike first and gain the upper hand. If we steal the treasure first and have it in our hands, then other thieves and bandits cannot steal it.”

Shuang’er clapped her hands and said with a laugh, “I get it, we catch the Old Emperor Monk first.”

“Exactly,” Wei Xiaobao said, “Without further ado, let’s leave now.”

The two of them reached the perimeter of the Qing Liang Temple. Wei Xiaobao said, “The sky is not dark yet, stealing stuff or stealing a monk, we must wait until the sky is dark.” The two of them hid in the wood, with great difficulty waiting for the whole mountain to be shrouded in darkness, and all noises ceased.

In a low voice Wei Xiaobao said, “In the temple, only Abbot one person knows martial art, luckily in the fight just now, he suffered an injury, he must be lying down to rest by now. You go seal that big fat monk Xing Dian’s acupoint, and then we can steal the Old Emperor monk out. It’s just that Xing Dian’s strength is enormous, that golden pestle of his is very formidable, you must be very careful.” Shuang’er nodded, indicating that she understood.

After listening attentively and convinced that there was nobody around, the two of them quietly leaped over the enclosure and walked toward the vihara where Shunzhi was meditating. They saw the board gate was already closed, but the damage done on the door by the kick earlier that day had not been repaired, it was put there only as a shield against the wind. Creeping closed to the wall, Shuang’er went in. She pulled the board facing left, and saw a flash or yellow light. ‘Whoosh!’ the golden pestle struck down from the gap between the door leaves.

Shuang’er waited until the golden pestle swung back up before she swiftly leaped in, while stretching out her finger to seal the two acupoints on Xing Dian’s chest one after another. “Really sorry!” she said in a low voice. Raising both hands, she grabbed the golden pestle in his hands. Xing Dian’s acupoints were sealed, his body turned weak and he slowly dropped down. The golden pestle was more than a hundred catties. If Shuang’er did not catch it, it would fell down and crush his toes. Wei Xiaobao followed; he dodged inside and pulled the door leaf.

The vihara was very small; in the darkness, he vaguely saw someone was sitting on a putuan. Wei Xiaobao knew it must be the Emperor Shunzhi whose Buddhist name was Xing Chi. Immediately he kowtowed and said, “Your servant Wei Xiaobao, who saved your honorable self during the day. Old Emperor, please do not panic.” Xing Chi was silent without making any noise.

Wei Xiaobao continued, “The Old Emperor is meditating quietly in here, actually, it is very good; however, there are a lot of bad people outside who want to capture the Old Emperor, who want to do you harm. In order to protect the Old Emperor, your servant would like to invite you to another peaceful place, so that the bad people won’t be able to get you.”

Xing Chi still did not reply. Wei Xiaobao said, “Well then, would the Old Emperor please leave together with your servant?”

A long time passed, Wei Xiaobao saw him still sit cross-legged, motionless. By this time Wei Xiaobao had been in the dark for quite a while, he started to be able to see more clearly. He noticed that Xing Chi’s posture in meditating was exactly the same as Yulin whom he saw during the day. Wei Xiaobao was not sure if he was really meditating, or he was simply ignoring him. He said, “The Old Emperor’s real identity is already known, there is no one in Qing Liang Temple who can protect you. A group of the enemy has left, another group will come, in the end, the Old Emperor will be captured by them. We’d better find another quiet place where you can meditate in peace.”

Xing Chi still did not reply. Xing Dian suddenly said, “You, two children are good people, luckily you saved me during the day. When my Shixiong is meditating, he does not talk to anyone. Where do you want him to go?” His voice was originally very loud, but he struggled hard to lower his voice, so that it became very hoarse.

Wei Xiaobao stood up and said, “Anywhere is alright. Wherever your Shixiong wishes to go, we will accompany him there. So long as those bad people cannot find him, the two of you can meditate and chant the names of Buddha in peace and quiet.”

“We do not chant the names of Buddha,” Xing Dian said.

---

[1] Xuanzang (602-664) Tang dynasty Buddhist monk and translator who travelled to India (629-645).

[2] The Monkey King and the pig-like character with a muck-rake as a weapon, both are characters in the novel Journey to the West.

[3] Another character in the novel Journey to the West. Shancai Hong Hai’er literally means ‘good/virtuous/benevolent Red Boy.

[4] Qi Tian Da Sheng – the self proclaimed title of the Monkey King.

[foxs]

“Alright,” Wei Xiaobao said, “Do not chant the names of Buddha is also fine. Shuang’er, quickly unseal this Dashi’s acupoints.”

Shuang’er stretched out her hand to massage Xing Dian’s back and the side of his torso to unseal his acupoints. “I am really sorry,” she said.

Xing Dian respectfully said to Xing Chi, “Shixiong, these two children are inviting us to temporarily go out and hide.”

Xing Chi said, “Shifu has not told us to leave Qing Liang Temple.” His voice was very clear and bright. It was the very first time that Wei Xiaobao heard his voice.

Xing Dian said, “If the enemies carry out a large scale operation to attack, these two children won’t be able to resist.”

“All circumstances are born in the heart,” Xing Chi said, “When it come to danger, everywhere in the world is dangerous. When the heart is peaceful, everywhere in the world is peaceful. The other day you killed and injured many people, and thus greatly accumulated evil business. Hereafter, no matter what, you must not rush indiscriminately into action without clear understanding.”

Xing Dian stared blankly for half a day before saying, “Shixiong’s direction is true.” Turning his head toward Wei Xiaobao he said, “Shixiong does not want to leave, you have heard him.”

Wei Xiaobao knitted his brows and said, “If the enemy came to get your Shixiong, slicing the flesh of his body piece by piece with a knife, what would you do?”

Xing Dian said, “None among the common people does not die; to live several years longer, or several years shorter, there is not much difference.”

“What do you mean there is not much difference?” Wei Xiaobao asked, “Then there is no difference between a dead person and a living person, there is no difference between man and woman, there is also no difference between monk and turtle or pig?”

“All living creatures are equal,” Xing Dian said, “It has always been like that since the beginning.”

Wei Xiaobao thought, “No wonder one is called Xing Chi, the other is called Xing Dian; they are indeed foolish and inverted[1]. Urging them to leave is unsuccessful. If we seal the Old Emperor’s acupoint and carry him out, it is indeed too disrespectful, plus it will be difficult to escape from other people’s attention.” In that moment he had his hands bound and was unable to do anything, his heart was angered and he was unable to hold back. “If there is not much difference between anything, then there is not much difference between the Empress and Empress Duan Jing, why do you have to leave home?” he blurted.

Xing Chi suddenly sprang up. “You … what did you say?” he asked in trembling voice.

As soon as he blurted out, Wei Xiaobao had already regretted it. Immediately he kowtowed and said, “Your servant is uttering nonsense, Old Emperor please do not get angry.”

Xing Chi said, “The matter of the past, I have already forgotten it. Why do you still use that kind of appellation? Please rise quickly, I have something I’d like to ask you.”

"Yes," Wei Xiaobao replied. He stood up, thinking, "I have succeeded in arousing your interest to talk, finally there is a little bit of progress."

"Where did you hear about the two Empresses from?" Xing Chi asked

"I heard it from Hai Dafu when he was talking to the Empress Dowager," Wei Xiaobao replied.

"You know Hai Dafu?" Xing Chi asked, "What happened to him?"

"He was killed by the Empress Dowager," Wei Xiaobao replied.

Xing Chi cried out in alarm. "He is dead?" he asked.

Wei Xiaobao said, "The Empress Dowager killed him using the 'Transforming Bones Soft Palm' skill."

With a trembling voice Xing Chi said, "How can the Empress Dowager know ... know martial art? How did you know?"

Wei Xiaobao said, "Hai Dafu and the Empress Dowager fought in the garden at the Palace of Compassionate and Peace, I saw it with my own eyes."

"Who are you?" Xing Chi asked.

"Your servant is the Imperial Bodyguard Deputy Chief Wei Xiaobao," Wei Xiaobao replied, and then he immediately added, "Currently I am on mission, sent by His Majesty himself. Here is the imperial edict." While saying that, he presented the imperial note Kangxi wrote.

Xing Chi was staring blankly for a moment, he did not reach out to take the letter. Xing Dian said, "There has never been any lantern in here."

Xing Chi sighed. "Is the young emperor well?" he asked, "Is he ... is he happy being the emperor?"

Wei Xiaobao said, "As soon as the young emperor found out that the Old Emperor is still alive, he wished to grow wings and fly to Mount Wutai. In the Palace he wept and he cried, he was grieving but was also delighted, he wanted to go up the mountain, no matter what. But then ... but then he was afraid he might neglect the important matters of the imperial court, so he sent your servant to come first and pay his respect to the Old Emperor. As soon as your servant return and present the memorial to him, the young emperor will personally come here."

With a trembling voice Xing Chi said, "He ... he does not need to come. He is a good emperor, thinking about the important matters of the imperial court first, not like me ..." Speaking to this point, his voice turned into sobs.

In the darkness they could hear the sound of his tears dripping on the lapel of his outer garment. Hearing him expressing the father-son affection, Shuang'er felt the pit of her stomach ached, tears also streaming down her face.

Wei Xiaobao thought that he should not miss this golden opportunity, right now the Old Emperor's emotion was agitated, he would easily hear what Wei Xiaobao had to say. Thereupon Wei Xiaobao said, "Hai Dafu has investigated everything clearly. The Empress Dowager murdered Prince Rong first, then she murdered Empress Duan Jing, and Empress Duan Jing's meizi Consort Zhen. Afterwards she also murdered the young emperor's mama. Hai Dafu has investigated everything clearly. When the Empress Dowager knew that the secret has been divulged, she personally killed Hai Dafu. She also dispatched a large number of people to go up Mount Wutai to plot against the Old Emperor's life."

The fact that Prince Rong, Empress Duan Jing and Consort Zhen, three people were killed by a martial art expert, had been investigated clearly by Hai Dafu, and had been reported to Xing Chi; afterwards he returned to the palace to investigate the murderer. But no matter what, Xing Chi could not believe that it was the Empress Dowager herself who went into action; he sighed and said, "The Empress Dowager does not know martial art."

Wei Xiaobao said, "The Old Emperor would understand everything after listening to Empress Dowager and Hai Dafu's exchange that night." Thereupon he narrated in details the conversation between the two people that night at the garden. He was eloquent [orig. clever tooth sharp tooth]; although he was talking very fast, each word was very clear.

Xing Chi was originally a sentimental person, only because he was devotedly attached to imperial concubine Dong'e that after her death he did not even want to be the Emperor anymore, he willingly abandoned his position of ten-thousand four-horse chariots and shut himself up in a small secluded room. Although he had practiced Zen meditation for several years, the shadow of imperial concubine Dong'e was etched very deep in his heart that as soon as he heard Wei Xiaobao mentioning her name, in an instant all meditation and Buddhism dharma were tossed away to the back of his mind. The exchange between Hai Dafu and the Empress Dowager flowed in his heart, grief and indignation met together, the flow of chi in the pit of his stomach was blocked, he felt as if he was about to explode.

Finished narrating, Wei Xiaobao added, "Since that old ... the Empress Dowager has started it, she will carry it through whatever happens; after she harms you, the Old Emperor, she will murder the young emperor. She also wants to dig Empress Duan Jing's grave and issue an imperial order throughout the land, to burn down the book 'Empress Duan Jing's Quotation'; she said that all those 'quotations' are a fart. Any family who possess a copy at home will be searched, their belongings confiscated, and they will be beheaded!" This last part was entirely his fabrication, but it just happened to touch the wound in Xing Chi's heart.

Xing Chi flew into rage, he slapped his own thigh forcefully and shouted, "That s1ut, I ... I should have deposed her early on. With her carry on like this, it just brings disaster!"

In the past, Shunzhi wholeheartedly wanted to depose the Empress and established imperial concubine Dong'e to be the Empress; it was only because the Empress Dowager blocked him that he relented. If the imperial concubine Dong'e did not die, sooner or later the Empress position would be hers.

Wei Xiaobao said, "Old Emperor, you can see through the world's affair, there is no difference between life and death, the young emperor must not be allowed to die, Empress Duan Jing's grave must not be excavated, the 'Empress Duan Jing's Quotations' must not be destroyed."

"Correct," Xing Chi said, "You are absolutely correct."

Wei Xiaobao said, "Therefore, we must go into hiding to avoid falling into the Empress Dowager's evil scheme. The first step in Empress Dowager's strategy is murdering you, the second step is murdering the young emperor, the third step is digging the grave and burn the 'Quotations'. As long as the first step is unsuccessful, she would not dare to execute the second step, the third step."

Shunzhi ascended the throne when he was seven, and left home to become Buddhist monk when he was twenty-four. By this time he was only in his thirties. His natural disposition was hot-tempered, his character fiery; in term of sensibility, although very young, Kangxi was ten times better than his father, consequently, when the Mu Palace people trying to frame Wu Sangui, Kangxi was able to see through their crafty scheme. Wei Xiaobao was telling him half truth and half lies, with a lot of fabrication in his speech, but Xing Chi accepted everything as the truth. However, although Wei Xiaobao fabricated the story about the Empress Dowager's three steps, he was a disciple of the marketplace, his way of thinking was about the same as that of an insidious woman.

In a loud voice Xing Chi said, "Luckily you lay everything bare in a few words, otherwise the important matter will be spoiled. Shidi, we must leave immediately."

"Yes," Xing Dian replied. With his right hand he picked up the golden pestle, with his left hand he pushed the door leaf open.

As the door opened, they saw a shadow standing on the doorway. Xing Dian was unable to see his appearance in the dark. "Who is it?" he shouted, while lifting up his golden pestle.

That man said, "Where are you two going?"

Xing Dian was shocked; he threw away the golden pestle, put his palms together and called out, "Shifu!"

Xing Chi also called out, "Shifu!"

Turned out it was none other than Yulin. He slowly said, "I have heard everything you said."

"Damn it," Wei Xiaobao cried out in his heart, "Things have turned to the worse!"

Yulin said in deep voice, "The worldly enmity leading to sin must be resolved, by blindly avoiding it, in the end you won't achieve anything. The cause will produce the result, which you must bear for as long as you live."

Xing Chi prostrated himself to the ground, saying, "Shifu's instruction is very true, disciple understands."

"I am afraid your understanding is not deep enough," Yulin said, "Your former wife wants to find you, let her come to find you. Our Buddha shows mercy to all living beings; she blamed you, she hated you, she wanted to kill you, you must resign yourself to her, you must introspect yourself instead, inevitably there must be something that made her blame you, hate you, a strong reason why she is determined to kill you. You try to avoid her, the karma remains. If you send someone to kill her, your evil karma will be even more grave."

"Yes," Xing Chi replied with a trembling voice.

Wei Xiaobao cursed in his belly, "F*ck your old bald thief's granny! I want to curse you, beat you, kill you, I want to see if you'll let me beat and curse you, I want to see if you'll let me cut your bald head?"

He heard Yulin continued, "As for Tibetan lamas wanted to capture you, it was they who commit evil karma, they want to use you as a hostage to force the current emperor into submission, to go on the rampage by ignoring the law, oppressing and doing harm to common people. We must not let them have their outrageous way. For the time being, you cannot live here, you must come with me to the little temple at the back." He turned around and left. Xing Chi and Xing Dian immediately followed him.

Wei Xiaobao thought, "Although the young emperor bestowed me the Yellow Magua, I have never worn it for even one day. If I cannot complete this mission, when I return to Beijing, I won't be able to answer the young emperor. In his anger, he might go back on his promise and thus won't bestow the Yellow Magua to me. I'd better follow them and take a look." Thereupon he and Shuang'er followed to Yulin's little meditation temple.

Yulin acted as if he did not even see these two people; ignoring them completely, he went straight to the putuan and sat cross-legged. Xing Chi also sat down on the putuan next to him. Xing Dian glanced around, and then sat down on the putuan slightly lower than Xing Chi's. Yulin and Xing Chi put their palms together and closed their eyes, sitting motionless. Xing Dian, however, opened his round eyes wide, staring at the empty space. Finally he also closed his eyes, his hands resting on his knees. After a while, he reached out to touch the golden pestle by the putuan, afraid that he might lose it.

Wei Xiaobao made a face toward Shuang'er, and then with exaggerated movement he also sat down on the putuan, Shuang'er also sat down close to him. Although Wei Xiaobao was not Sun Wukong, he had always been an active and restless boy, just like real monkey. If he was asked to sit still on the putuan for three quarters of an hour to an hour, it would be the same as asking for his life. But since the Old Emperor was sitting by his side, he was unwilling to leave the temple, no matter what. He twisted to the east, skewed to the west, pulling Shuang'er's hand, tickling the palm of her hand. With great difficulty Shuang'er resisted the urge to laugh, with her left hand she pointed to Yulin and Xing Chi.

After enduring this for about an hour, Wei Xiaobao suddenly had a thought, "Even if he is learning to be a monk, the Old Emperor can't possibly resist the need to pee and poo. When he is going out to pee or poo, I will use graceful words, flowery speech to trick him into escaping." Having had this idea, his body calmed down somewhat.

In the quiet night, suddenly they heard footsteps of a lot of people in the distance. At first the sound was faint, but later on the footsteps were getting nearer and nearer, a large crowd of people were rushing toward Qing Liang Temple. The muscles on Xing Dian's face twitched several times, he reached out to grab the golden pestle. Opening up his eyes, he saw Yulin and Xing Chi were still sitting motionless. He hesitated for a moment, and then he put down the golden pestle, and closed his eyes again.

They heard the crowd burst into Qing Liang Temple and the continuous sound of people yelling and shouting. Wei Xiaobao thought, "When they fail to find the Old Emperor in the temple, can't they come here to look for him? I want to see how you, the old bald thief, are going to stop them."

Sure enough, approximately one hour later, a large group of people swarmed toward the back of the mountain, and arrived outside the little temple. Someone called out, "Go in and search!"

Xing Dian suddenly sprang up, grabbed his golden pestle, and stood on the vihara's doorway. Wei Xiaobao went to the window and peeked outside. Under the moonlight he saw a dense mass of heads. Turning his head around, he saw Yulin and Xing Chi were still sitting motionless. Shuang'er quietly said, "What should we do?"

---

[1] Xing means ‘to walk/go/travel, to perform/capable of/competent’, Chi means ‘imbecile, sentimental, stupid, foolish’, Dian means ‘fall forwards, inverted, jolt’.

[foxs]

Wei Xiaobao replied in low voice, "When those people rush in, we'll save the Old Emperor, and go out from the back door." After a short pause, he continued, "If along the way we get separated, we'll meet again at Ling Jing Temple."

Shuang'er nodded and said, "I am only afraid I can't carry the Old ... the Old Emperor."

"We might have to drag him away," Wei Xiaobao replied.

Suddenly the people outside shouted one after another, "Who's there randomly breaking through here?" "Grab them!" "Don't let them in!" "Damn it, get them!"

Shadows of people flashed, two men entered the door, swept past Xing Dian's body. They put their palms together toward Yulin, and then sat cross-legged on the floor. Turned out they were monks wearing gray robes. The door to this vihara was actually narrow, plus Xing Dian's bulky body was blocking it, there was really no gap between Xing Dian and the door, yet these two monks lightly and easily slipped through and came in, it seemed that they did not even touch Xing Dian's clothes. Indeed, nobody knew how these two entered the room.

Outside, the people were shouting again, "Someone is coming!" "Stop him!" "Get him!" But they heard a series of 'bang! bang! bang!' noise, some people flew out and fell to the ground. Two more monks entered the room. Without saying anything, they sat down a little bit lower than the two monks who came in first. In this way, pair by pair, several monks successively entered the room.

Wei Xiaobao was amused, he wondered how many more monks would come in; if several more pairs came, very soon there would not be enough room to sit in that meditation room. But after the ninth pair, no more monks came in. To his surprise, one of the ninth pair of monks was the Qing Liang Temple's Abbot Cheng Guang. Wei Xiaobao was baffled, but was grateful at the same time. "If these seventeen monks' martial art skill is more or less the same as Cheng Guang's, we don't have to fear even if more enemies were coming," he mused.

Outside, the people were still making a lot of noise, but nobody dared to rush in. After a while, an old-sounding voice said, loud and clear, "Since Shaolin Temple is determined to stand up for Qing Liang Temple, are you going to take the responsibility over this matter on your own heads too?" In the meditation room, nobody answered.

After another moment, the old man outside said again, "Very well, since they have showed off the faces of Shaolin Temple's Eighteen Luohan, we'd better leave!" Shouts and yells outside repeated continuously, everybody withdrew down the mountain.

Wei Xiaobao sized up the eighteen monks; the old ones were approximately sixty, seventy years old, the young ones were approximately in their thirties, some were tall, some were short, some were handsome, some were ugly. Their Buddhist robes were bulging, apparently they all carried weapons. "They are the Shaolin Temple's Eighteen Luohan," he thought, "In that case, Abbot Cheng Guang is also one of the Eighteen Luohan. The old bald thief Yulin is secure in the knowledge that he has a strong backing, turns out he had early on arranged these formidable helpers to escort the Emperor. These monks are meditating in here, I don't know until when they are going to do this. Laozi cannot waste my time with them, sitting here for nothing. Wei Xiaobao must not sit here until he turns into Wei Laobao[1]!"

Standing up, he went to Xing Chi and knelt down in his presence, saying, "Great Monk, with the Shaolin Temple's Eighteen Luohan escorting your holy self, you, the Great Monk, is as safe and unmovable as Mount Tai. I am prepared to go back, I wonder if you, Senior, have any instruction?"

Xing Chi opened his eyes; he smiled and said, "Thank you for your trouble. Go back and tell your master: he does not need to go up Mount Wutai and disturb my peaceful meditation. Even if he is here, definitely I won't meet him. Tell him this: if he wants the whole world at peace, 'never raise taxes', these four words [yong bu jia fu] should be firmly planted in his mind. If he can accomplish these four words, it is good enough for me, my heart will be happy."

"Yes!' Wei Xiaobao replied.

Xing Chi reached into his bosom and took out a very small bundle, he said, "Give this copy of scripture to your master. Tell him: in the matters of the world, he must let nature take its course, nothing can be forced. It would be best if he could benefit the common people of the Central Plains. But if the common people wanted us to leave, then from the place we came, there we should come back to." While saying that, he lightly patted the little bundle.

Wei Xiaobao recalled what Tao Hongying had told him; he mused, "Could it be that this is another copy of the Forty-two Chapter Sutra?" Seeing Xing Chi was handing him the bundle over, he reached out and received it with both hands.

After being silent for half a day, Xing Chi said, "You may go!"

"Yes!" Wei Xiaobao said. He crawled down and kowtowed.

"I do not dare," Xing Chi said, "Benefactor, please rise."

Wei Xiaobao stood up and walked toward the door. Suddenly his mischief arose, he turned his head toward Yulin and said, "Old monk, you have sat for a long time, don't you need to pee?" Yulin acted as if he did not hear anything. Wei Xiaobao giggled, and took a step over the threshold.

Xing Chi said, "Tell your master, even if his mother is at fault, she will always be his mother, he must not fail to observe etiquette, he also must not harbor grudge toward her."

Wei Xiaobao turned around to respond, but in his heart he said, "I am not going to pass on this words of yours."

Xing Chi said, as if he was muttering to himself, "Tell your master to be careful in everything."

"Yes," Wei Xiaobao replied.

Back at the Ling Jing Temple, Wei Xiaobao closed the door and opened the bundle. As expected, it was the Forty-two Chapter Sutra, only the envelope was made of yellow silk. He pondered over what Xing Chi had said, and thought that it corresponds with what Tao Hongying had told him. Xing Chi said, 'If the common people wanted us to leave, then from the place we came, there we should come back to.' From outside the mountain pass Manchu people came to the Central Plains; if they want to return, naturally they should go back outside the pass. Xing Chi patted the little package once, obviously he was saying that when the Manchus go back, they could rely on this little package to live their lives. Wei Xiaobao also thought, "The Old Emperor told me to give this sutra to Xiao Xuanzi, should I give it to him or not? I have already had five copies in my hands, with this one, altogether I have six. Of the eight copies, I only short two. If I give this to Xiao Xuanzi, I am afraid the five copies I have will be quite useless. Luckily he did say that even if Xiao Xuanzi goes up Mount Wutai, he won't meet him; dead men tell no tales. This is a good thing dropped in front of my door, if I don't embezzle it, I am letting my Wei family's ancestors down." But then he thought about how the young emperor had complete confidence in him, embezzling his stuff means he was unworthy to be his friend, that he was being tactless and impulsive toward a friend, not the character of a hero or a warrior. Besides, even if he embezzled the book, he could not read it anyway, so giving it to a good friend seemed to be the right thing to do.

By daybreak the next morning, Wei Xiaobao led Shuang'er, Yu Ba, and their retinue going down the mountain. In going to Mount Wutai this time, he managed to see the Old Emperor, and thus achieved the mission Kangxi entrusted to him. Along the way, he acquired Shuang'er, such a good-looking, tender girl [or servant girl] with superior martial art skill; his heart was very happy.

After walking for about a little over ten li, they saw a toutuo [see footnote 1 (on the title of this chapter)] coming from the opposite direction on the mountain road ahead. This toutuo was very tall, compared to that giant monk Xing Dian, it would be difficult to tell who was taller, but he was strangely very thin. Abbot Cheng Guang was already very thin, but this toutuo was at least half as thin as he. His face looked like skin wrapping a skull, his eyes were very deep, he really looked like a zombie. Perhaps it would take four of this toutuo combined to equal one Xing Dian. His long hair was draped across his shoulder, with a steel hoop on the top of his head to control his hair. He wore an oversized cloth robe, which was fluttering in the wind, as if it was hanging on a clothes-hanger.

Seeing this kind of appearance, Wei Xiaobao was rather scared, he did not dare to look too much, thus he turned his head away and evaded to the other side of the road, letting the toutuo walk pass. As the toutuo walked to him, he halted his steps and asked, “Did you come from Qing Liang Temple?”

“No,” Wei Xiaobao replied, “We came from Ling Jing Temple.”

The toutuo reached out with his left hand toward Wei Xiaobao’s left shoulder and turned his body around, so that Wei Xiaobao was face-to-face with him. “Are you the little eunuch Xiao Guizi from the Palace?” he asked.

His big hand pressed on Wei Xiaobao’s shoulder, immediately Wei Xiaobao felt his body went weak, he was unable to move a single step. “Rubbish!” he hastily said, “You think I look like an eunuch? I am Wei Gongzi [young master, son of nobility] of Yangzhou.”

“Let go of him quickly!” Shuang’er shouted, “How can you be so rude to our family’s Xianggong?”

The toutuo stretched out his right hand to press on Shuang’er’s shoulder. “Listening to your voice, you must be a little eunuch too,” he said.

Shuang’er dropped her right shoulder to dodge, her finger swiftly pointed toward his tian huo acupoint, ‘plop’ it hit right on target, but she felt as if her finger was touching am iron panel, her fingertip was in a lot of pain, even her finger was almost broken. “Ah!” she could not help but crying out. And then she felt her shoulder was in pain too, because the toutuo’s hand, which was as big as a palm-leaf fan, had grabbed her.

“Hey, hey, hey!” the toutuo laughed three times, before saying, “You, this little eunuch, has a very good martial art skill. Formidable, really formidable.”

Shuang’er’s left leg flew up, ‘Bang!’ it landed on his crotch; this time, she felt as if she was kicking a large rock. “Aiyo!” she cried out, tears flowed out of her eyes.

“Little eunuch has amazing martial art, really formidable,” the toutuo said.

“I am not a little eunuch!” Shuang’er shouted, “You are the little eunuch! Aiyo!”

The toutuo laughed, “Do you think I look like a eunuch?” he asked.

“Let me go!” Shuang’er shouted, “If you don’t, I am going to curse you.”

The toutuo said, “You sealed my acupoint, you kicked my thigh, I am not afraid of you; do you think I will afraid your cussing? Your martial art skill is superior, you must be sent out from the Palace, I must search you.”

“Your martial art skill is even higher,” Wei Xiaobao said, “So you must be sent out from the Palace even more.”

The toutuo said, “You, little eunuch, muddle things together." With left hand carrying Wei Xiaobao and right hand carrying Shuang’er, he rushed up the mountain as if he was flying. The two young people shouted and screaming, the toutuo did not pay any attention, he carried the two people as if they were nothing, his footsteps were very fast. Yu Ba and the others were dumbstruck, nobody dared to make any noise.

The toutuo rushed several zhang along the mountain path, suddenly he turned towards the hill; there was no real path there, but he tread on it as if treading on a plain ground. Wei Xiaobao felt the wind whistling past his ears; he thought, “This toutuo is very formidable, could it be he is a mountain god or some demon?”

After rushing for a while, the toutuo dropped the two people on the ground. He pointed up and said, “If you don’t tell me the truth, I am going to carry you to that mountain peak and toss you down.” What he was pointing at was a very high peak, the top of the peak is hidden in the clouds and mist.

“Alright,” Wei Xiaobao said, “I’ll tell you the truth.”

“If you are sensible,” the toutuo said, “Tell me truthfully, who are you? And who is this kid?”

“Dashi Fu [Great Master father],” Wei Xiaobao said, “She is not a kid, she … she is my … my …”

“Your what?” the toutuo asked.

“She is my … wife!” Wei Xiaobao said.

As soon as these two characters ‘wife’ [lao po] came out of his mouth, both the toutuo and Shuang’er were shocked. Shuang’er’s face blushed deep red. “What?” the toutuo asked in surprise, “What wife?”

“I am not concealing anything from Dashi Fu,” Wei Xiaobao said, “I am a young master of a rich family in Beijing, I fancied this young lady of the family next door, thereupon … we privately agreed to marry each other in the back garden. His father did not agree, so I took her out and we ran away. Look at her, she is a girl, how can she be a little eunuch? You are really doing her injustice. If you don’t believe me, take off her hat and look for yourself.”

The toutuo took off Shuang’er’s hat, exposing her long beautiful hair. At that time, in the whole of China, other than monks, Taoists, toutuo, nuns and people who had left home, everybody must shave the half front part of their heads. Shuang’er’s long hair rolled down, it hung down straight pass her shoulder, no doubt she was a woman.

“Dashi Fu,” Wei Xiaobao said, “I am begging you, if you hand us over to the government authority, I will lose my life. I’ll give you a thousand taels, just let us go!”

“In that case,” the toutuo said, “You really are not an eunuch; which eunuch would take other family’s girl to elope together? Humph, humph, you are very young, but your courage is indeed not small.” While saying that, he let him go. He also asked, “What are you doing going up Mount Wutai?”

Wei Xiaobao replied, “We are going up Mount Wutai to worship Buddha, to ask Bodhisattva to bless and protect us, to let me escape difficulties and become the zhuangyuan, in the future she … my wife, will become a real Madame.” All these ‘privately agreed to marry each other in the back garden’ and ‘escape difficulties and become the zhuangyuan’ and so on he heard from the storytellers when he was still in Yangzhou.

The toutuo thought for a moment, he nodded his head and said, “So I mistook you for someone else. You may go!”

Wei Xiaobao was greatly delighted, “Thank you Dashi,” he said, “When we worship Bodhisattva later, we will ask Bodhisattva to bless and protect you, bless and protect Dashi that in the future … you will also be a great Bodhisattva, that you will rise and sit on the same level with Wenshu Pusa [Manjushri, the Bodhisattva of keen awareness] and Guanyin Pusa [Bodhisattva of Compassion].” Taking Shuang’er’s hand along, they walked down the mountain.

They only walked for several when the toutuo said, “Something’s not right, come back here! Little miss, your martial art skill is amazing, you sealed my acupoint, you kicked me.” While saying that, he rubbed the tian huo acupoint on his waist, and then he asked, “Who taught you martial art? Which school do you belong to?”

Shuang’er could not lie, she blushed and shook her head. Wei Xiaobao said, “Her martial art skill is handed down in a family, it was her mama who taught her.”

“Little miss, what’s your surname?” the toutuo asked.

Wei Xiaobao said, “This, hee hee … it’s rather inconvenient to say.”

“What do you mean inconvenient?” the toutuo said, “Tell me quick!”

“Our surname is Zhuang,” Shuang’er said.

The toutuo shook his head. “Surname Zhuang?” he said, “That’s not right, you lie to me. There is no such martial art expert among those with surname Zhuang in the world, who can teach a girl with such martial art skill.”

Wei Xiaobao said, “There are extremely many people with good martial art skill in the world, how can you know?”

“I was asking this little miss,” the toutuo angrily said, “Don’t interrupt.” While saying that, he pushed lightly on Wei Xiaobao’s shoulder.

---

[1] 'Xiaobao' - little/young treasure, 'Laobao' - old treasure.

[foxs]

This push was very light, for fear that this youngster could not stand it. When his palm touched Wei Xiaobao's shoulder, he felt Wei Xiaobao easily evaded it. Although his movement was without any strength, the style he used was the move 'grass stooping down by the wind'; where the shoulder turned around, left palm protecting the face and the right palm ready to strike down, actually it was somewhat similar to the toutuo's own school.

The toutuo was surprised, he tried to grab Wei Xiaobao's chest. Wei Xiaobao sent out a right palm stab with the move 'spirit snake went out of its hole'; the execution was not the least bit inaccurate. 'Plop!' it hit the toutuo's neck. But Wei Xiaobao felt like his fingers were stabbing an iron panel. "Aiyo!" he cried out in pain.

Shuang'er's pair of palms fluttered in the air to attack the toutuo. The toutuo concentrated his strength at the center of his palm and sealed the acupoint on Wei Xiaobao's chest before turning around to face her. Shuang'er leaped high and crouched low, her movements were light and graceful, but after seven, eight moves, the toutuo's two hands managed to catch her arms. With his left elbow he struck her acupoint to immobilize her, and then he turned around and asked Wei Xiaobao, "You said you are a young master of a rich family; how do you know the qin na [grappling technique] of Shen Long Dao [divine dragon island] of Liao Dong peninsula?"

"I am a young master of a rich family," Wei Xiaobao replied, "Why can't I know the martial art of Shen Long Island of Liao Dong peninsula? Are you saying that this skill is supposed to be known by only kids from poor family?" While his mouth was uttering whatever he could come up with to buy some time, his mind was racing, "What kind of martial art is the Shen Long Island of Liao Dong peninsula's martial art? Ah, right, the old turtle Hai said that the old ***** impersonated Wudang Pai's martial art, but actually it was the Snake Island of Liao Dong peninsula's martial art. That Shen Long Island is most likely the same as the Snake Island. That's right, the old ***** is in cahoots with Shen Long Jiao people, they must dislike the name 'snake' and thus changed it to 'divine dragon'. Xiao Xuanzi's martial art skill was taught by the old *****, and I often had martial art match with him, unconsciously I learned these several qin na techniques."

"Rubbish!" the toutuo said, "Who is your Shifu?"

Wei Xiaobao thought, "If I say I was taught by the old *****, it's the same as admitting that I am a little eunuch from the Palace." Thereupon he said, "It was my Shushu's [younger uncle] good acquaintance, a fat lady, Liu Yan Gugu who taught me."

The toutuo was greatly surprised. "Liu Yan?" he asked, "Miss Liu is your Shushu's good acquaintance? Who is your Shushu?"

"My Shushu is Wei Dabao [da - big]," Wei Xiaobao [xiao - little] replied, "He is Beijing's well-known distinguished and accomplished young master, each time he spends money, it would be a thousand taels, his appearance looks like an actor on the stage. That fat lady was enchanted by him as soon as she saw him. The fat lady oftentimes came to my house in the depth of the night, jumping over the wall of our flower garden. I nagged her to teach me martial art, and so she taught me these several moves."

Half believing and half doubting, the toutuo asked, "Does your Shushu know martial art?"

Wei Xiaobao laughed aloud and said, "Does he know farting martial art? He often gets his neck grabbed by Miss Liu Yan, who lifted him up back and forth, without him being able to move the least bit. My Shushu became anxious and cursed her, 'The child is lifting the father'. Liu Yan Gugu laughed and said, 'It's only the child lifting the father, even if the child is lifting the grandfather, it is still not a big deal'."

He was cursing the toutuo in a roundabout way, but the toutuo did not realize it the least bit; he asked in detail about Liu Yan's appearance, which, surprisingly, Wei Xiaobao was able to explain without the slightest mistake. Wei Xiaobao said, "This fat Gugu loves to wear red embroidered shoes. Dashi Fu, I am guessing that you are in love with her, are you not? When you see her, take her to sleep with you, it would be best if you could sleep with her and would not wake up forever." How would the toutuo know that Liu Yan had already died? On the surface it sounded like Wei Xiaobao was babbling nonsense, while actually he was cursing him with the most poisonous curse.

The toutuo angrily said, "Little child should not talk nonsense!" But he actually believed him. He reached out toward Wei Xiaobao's lower abdomen and patted it lightly, to unseal his acupoint. Unexpectedly his hand touched the Forty-two-chapter Sutra in Wei Xiaobao's bosom, when he patted, the acupoint was not opened. "What is that?" the toutuo asked.

"It's a big stack of banknotes I stole from home," Wei Xiaobao replied.

"Braggart!" the toutuo said, "How can there be that many banknotes?" Reaching into Wei Xiaobao's pocket, he groped around and took the package out. When he untied the package, to his utter amazement, he found a sutra. He was dumbstruck for a moment, and then his face showed utter delight. "Forty-two-chapter Sutra! Forty-two-chapter Sutra!" he called out. Hastily he wrapped it back and put it inside his own pocket. Grabbing Wei Xiaobao by the chest, he raised him high and in a stern voice asked, "Where did you get it from?"

This question was not easy to answer, Wei Xiaobao laughed. "Tee hee ... hee ... are you asking me? It's complicated and not easy to explain succinctly; I won't be able to tell you everything just in this short moment." He was stalling, while trying to think about some 'covering the sky and seamless clouds’ story to swindle this toutuo. Naturally to make up some wild story about where the sutra came from was extremely easy, but now that the book had fallen into the toutuo's hand, to deceive him into handing it back would be extremely difficult.

The toutuo said in a loud voice, "Who gave it to you?"

Wei Xiaobao's body was hanging in the air, he suddenly saw seven, eight monks in grey robes on the hillside coming toward them. From their appearance, he knew they were the Eighteen Luohan of Shaolin whom he had seen at the small vihara behind the Qing Liang Temple. Turning his head around, he saw several more monks, together with several monks coming up from the western hillside, there were a total of seventeen, eighteen monks. He was delighted and said in his heart, "Thief toutuo, even if your martial art skill is stronger, you are no match for the Eighteen Luohan of Shaolin."

"Tell me quick, tell me quick!" the toutuo said. Noticing that Wei Xiaobao was glancing to the east and looking to the west, he followed his gaze and saw on the hillside to the east, north and west, three directions more than a dozen monks were slowly coming up, but he was unconcerned at all. “What do those monks come here for?” he asked.

Wei Xiaobao said, “They heard Dashi Fu’s martial art skill is superior, they are full of admiration, hence they come here to take you as their master.”

The toutuo shook his head and said, “I have never received any disciple.” Raising his voice, he called out, “Hey, get the hell out of here quickly, don’t come here to make trouble!” His shout echoed from the mountains on all sides, showing off his astonishing might.

The eighteen monks did not seem to hear, they continued going up the mountain. An old monk with long eyebrows put his palms together and said, “Dashi, are you the Fat Revered Monk[1] of Liaodong?”

Wei Xiaobao was still hanging midair, hearing the question, he could not help but burst out laughing. This toutuo was so thin that he was a rarity in the world, yet the old monk asked if he was the Fat Revered Monk; Wei Xiaobao thought that he was ridiculing him.

To his surprise, the toutuo replied in loud voice, “I am indeed Fat Toutuo! Are you all here to take me as your master? I don’t accept any disciple! Whom have you studied martial art with?”

The old monk replied, “Lao Na is Cheng Xin of Shaolin Temple, the humble head of Damo Hall. These are my seventeen Shidi, all are my companions in the Damo Hall.”

“Ah!” Fat Toutuo exclaimed, he slowly let Wei Xiaobao down. “Turns out all eighteen luohan of Shaolin Temple’s Damo Hall are here. So you are not here to take me as your master. I am alone cannot beat all of you.”

Cheng Xin put his palms together and said, “We have neither grievance nor enmity with you, we are all followers of Buddha, how could you talk about this character ‘to beat’? Luohan [Arhat] are the sages of Buddhism, we are merely ordinary folks, how can we dare to receive this appellation? Wulin friends carelessly address us with this honorary title, we really do not deserve it. The Fat and Thin Revered Monks of Liaodong’s remarkable feats are without rival, we have always admired you. Today we are brought together by fate, indeed it is our great good fortune.” Speaking to this point, the other seventeen monks put their palms together to salute.

Fat Toutuo bowed to return the salute; without straightening up his body, he asked, “You are all coming to Mount Wutai, what's the purpose of your trip?"

Pointing to Wei Xiaobao, Cheng Xin said, "This young benefactor has some relationship with our Shaolin Temple, I am asking Dashi to raise your hand and let him go down the mountain."


Fat Toutuo hesitated; he saw the opponent had many men and greater force, he knew that each one of the eighteen luohan of Shaolin had astonishing martial art skill, he did not give the slightest care of fighting one on one, but he would not be able to deal with all eighteen of them. Thereupon he said, "Very well, looking at Dashi's face, I'll let him go." Finished speaking, he leaned over and massaged Wei Xiaobao's lower abdomen several times to unseal his acupoint.

As soon as Wei Xiaobao was able to stand, he held out his right palm and said, "The sutra was given to me by a friend of these eighteen luohan, who asked me to deliver it to ... to Shaolin Temple and hand it over to the head monk Abbot. Would you return it to me?"

"What?" Fat Toutuo angrily said, "What does this sutra have to do with Shaolin Temple?"

With a loud voice Wei Xiaobao said, "You seized the sutra away from me, it was the old monk who ask me to deliver it to someone else, it is extremely important, quickly give it back to me!"

"Rubbish!" Fat Toutuo said. Turning around, he leaped down from the northern slope of the mountain. Three Shaolin monks immediately flew and reached out to grab his arm, Fat Toutuo did not dare to fight the monks, he sidestepped to evade the three monks' grabbing palm. His stature was very tall, yet his movement was incomparably agile.

In this grabbing movement, the three monks of Shaolin had used top-notch technique of Shaolin martial arts, unexpectedly they failed to even touch his clothes. But in the instant Fat Toutuo's movement was slowed down, four more Shaolin monks had blocked behind his back, eight palms crisscrossed, closing his escape route.

Fat Toutuo let out a loud bellow, his palms pushed out using the move 'five nails cut into the mountain'. Borrowing the momentum of this overwhelming force, he turned around and swiftly fled southward. The four Shaolin monks pushed put their palms together from left and right. Fat Toutuo's palm force collided with the four monks. He felt the palm strike from the left side was hard and stiff, while the palm strike of other two monks from the right was soft and continuously flowing; he could not help but was greatly shocked. Sending out all his power to his palms, he was barely able to resist the opposing force. Right this time, from behind him three claws were coming toward his back.

Fat Toutuo took a quick glance and saw the two monks on his left sending out their punches, instantly his feet kicked the ground and he flew upward; but the extended palms of the three monks behind him were not the same, they were using 'dragon claw', 'tiger claw' and 'eagle claw' styles, respectively, he was intimidated inwardly. Coiling his large sleeve, he created a gust of strong wind, as soon as his left foot landed on the ground, his right hand grabbed Wei Xiaobao. "Do you want him to die, or do you want him to live?" he called out.

Some of the eighteen Shaolin monks advancing, some retreating, they formed two circles, surrounding Fat Toutuo in the middle. Cheng Xin said, "The sutra of this young benefactor is very important, I am asking Dashi to please return it, and thus binding good karma. We will be deeply grateful."

With right hand lifting Wei Xiaobao high in the air and left palm pressing the crown of his head, Fat Toutuo walked southwards in big strides. The situation was clear: if the Shaolin monks put forth their hands to block him, he would slightly exert some strength on his left palm, Wei Xiaobao's skull would be crushed immediately.

The several Shaolin monks blocking on the south hesitated. They could only chant 'Amitabha Buddha' and stepped aside to let him through. Carrying Wei Xiaobao, Fat Toutuo dashed to the south, he went faster and faster. The eighteen luohan of Shaolin Temple unleashed their qing gong to follow him closely.

By this time, Shuang'er's sealed acupoint had been unsealed by the Shaolin monks. Seeing Wei Xiaobao was captured, she was alarmed and frightened, and immediately raised her chi to pursue. Since her punching and kicking skill was taught by an expert, her martial art was quite amazing, but she was still very young, her internal energy cultivation differed too far from those Shaolin monks, plus her stature was small, her steps short, in just one or two li, she had already fallen behind. In her distress, she broke up crying, but she did not stop running after them. Although Fat Toutuo was carrying a person, his speed did not diminished at all, unexpectedly the Shaolin monks were not able to catch on.

After running for a while, still carrying Wei Xiaobao, Fat Toutuo dashed toward a mountain peak directly south of them. The eighteen Shaolin monks ran after him in single file. Shuang'er followed to the foot of the peak and she was already out of breath. Looking up, she saw the peak was very high; she thought that the evil toutuo took her xianggong to the top of the mountain peak, there was a one in ten thousand chance that he would take a wrong step and fall down. The evil toutuo may not necessarily die, but how could xianggong be alive?

While she was having this frightening thought, suddenly she heard loud rumbling noise as pieces of big rocks rolled down the mountain path. The eighteen Shaolin monks leaped to the left and jumped to the right, continuously dodging the rocks. What happened was that as Fat Toutuo reached the peak, he continuously kicked the rocks along the path so that the rocks rolled down to block the enemy. How could the eighteen Shaolin monks let the rocks smash them? However, the distance between them widened considerably.

When battling Huangfu Ge, Abbot Cheng Guang had received injury on the pit of his stomach, his internal energy was adversely affected, he fell behind the seventeenth monk. Shuang'er struggled hard to pursue to the peak, she called out, "Fangzhang Dashi, Fangzhang Dashi!"

Cheng Guang turned his head around and stopped to wait for her. Seeing her rushing while gasping for breath, and with frightened expression on her face, he consoled her by saying, "Don't be afraid! He won't harm your master [orig. gongzi]." Afraid that she might hurt herself by rushing like that, he took her hand and together they slowly walked up the mountain.

Shuang'er's heart was somewhat comforted; she asked, "Abbot, he ... can he possibly harm Xianggong?"

"He can't," Cheng Guang replied. Although his mouth said so, seeing Fat Toutuo was so vicious, how could he ascertain that?

This mountain peak was Mount Wutai's southern platform [reminder: wutai means five platforms], luckily it was a winding mountain path, with a lot of twists and turns, after several turns, the rocks Fat Toutuo kicked were no longer a threat to them. By the time Cheng Guang and Shuang'er reached the Southern Platform Peak, they saw seventeen Shaolin monks were surrounding a temple; naturally Fat Toutuo and Wei Xiaobao were inside the temple.

Altogether Mount Wutai has five mountain peaks, on each peak there was a temple. Mount Wutai was a Buddhist mountain dedicated to the teaching of Manjushri, each temple on the peak was dedicated to the different title of Manjushri, according to Manjushri's vast divine power, and according to the different era that he appeared in the flesh. The Eastern Platform was called Wang Hai Peak, the temple built on the peak was the Wang Hai Temple [lit. facing the ocean], dedicated to the intelligence of Manjushri. On the Northern Platform's Ye Dou[2] Peak, there was Ling Ying Temple [spiritual response], dedicated to 'without disgrace' of Manjushri. On the Central Platform's Cui Yan [azure cliff] Peak, there was Yan Jiao Temple [practicing religion], dedicated to scholarly boy Manjushri. On the Western Platform's Gua Yue [hanging moon] Peak, the Fa Lei Temple [thundering Buddhist teaching] built there was dedicated to the lion-like character of Manjushri. On the Southern Platform's Jin Xiu [beautiful] Peak, the Pu Ji Temple [universal relief] constructed there was dedicated to the wisdom of Manjushri. [Translator's note: my apology for being unfamiliar with Buddhist teaching, and thus the translation might be inaccurate. I simply translated the words literally, if any of you have better idea, feel free to suggest correction.]

---

[1] Orig. Pang Zunzhe – fat ‘honored sir’, can be referring to a person of higher status or seniority, or a Buddhist monk

[2] Ye - business/estate/property, Dou - fight or bucket, but could also refer to bei dou - big dipper constellation.

[foxs]

These people happened to be on the Jin Xiu Peak, and that temple was the Pu Ji Temple. Shuang'er called out several times, "Xianggong, Xianggong!" But there was no reply. Lifting up her feet, she rushed into the temple.

Shuang'er dashed straight toward the main hall and saw Fat Toutuo was standing by the mouth of the water drainage from the eaves of the Hall of Great Strength, his right hand was still clutching Wei Xiaobao. Shuang'er rushed over can called out, "Xianggong, did the evil monk hurt you?"

"Don't worry," Wei Xiaobao replied, "He will not dare to harm me."

Fat Toutuo angrily said, "Why won't I dare to harm you?"

Wei Xiaobao laughed, "If you harm a single strand of my hair, the eighteen luohan of Shaolin will catch you, and will change you back to your original state; you will turn back into a short and fat man, then you will be really bad."

Fat Toutuo's countenance changed greatly; with a trembling voice he said, "What do you mean change me back to my original state? You ... you ... how did you know?"

Actually, Wei Xiaobao did not have the slightest idea, he was only thinking that his stature was tall and thin, but he was called the ‘Fat Toutuo’, so he was just speaking thoughtlessly, without any reason whatsoever. Unexpectedly, he seemed to hit the toutuo’s sore spot.

Wei Xiaobao was able to see the change in the toutuo’s countenance, and hear the fright in his voice; immediately he laughed coldly, “Hey, hey, naturally I know,” he said.

“They don’t have that ability,” Fat Toutuo said. Suddenly his right foot flew up, ‘Bang!’ he kicked the stone drum in front of the steps that it crashed onto the screen wall across the gate. Fragments of rocks swirl in the air. He turned to Shuang’er and asked, “What are you doing here? Are you bored of being alive?”

Shuang’er said, “Xianggong and I will live together and die together; if you harm just half a part of him, I will fight you to the death.”

“Damn it,” Fat Toutuo angrily said, “What’s so good about this little demon? Are you, the little baby girl, in love with him?”

Shuang’er blushed, she could not answer the question. “Xianggong is a good man,” she said, “You are a wicked man.”

They heard the eighteen Shaolin monks outside chanted the name of Buddha together, “Amitabha Buddha, Amitabha Buddha! Fat Reverend Monk, please release the young benefactor and return the sutra to him! You are an outstanding and famous hero and warrior of the Wulin world, yet you are making things difficult for a little child, won’t you be the laughingstock of the people of the world?”

Fat Toutuo roared, “If you keep babbling nonsense, Laozi will not be polite anymore. We will all break up with one strike, laozi will kill this little child and destroy the sutra, I want to see what are you going to do about it?”

Cheng Xin said, “Fat Reverend Monk, what do you want so that you will be willing to release him and return the sutra?”

“Release him is still possible,” Fat Toutuo said, “But no matter what, I won’t return the sutra.” The monks outside fell silent.

Fat Toutuo looked around the main hall, looking for a way to escape. Suddenly grey shadows flashed, the eighteen Shaolin monks flew into the hall. Keeping close to the left wall, five Shaolin monks circled around to his back. Keeping close to the left wall, five Shaolin monks circled around to his back. In an instant he was surrounded again by the eighteen Shaolin monks.

Fat Toutuo angrily said, “If you have guts, let’s fight one on one. You can try Laozi’s hands one by one, taking turn in fighting me, laozi won’t care.”

Cheng Xin put his palms together and said, “Please forgive our rudeness, we must fight you together.”

Fat Toutuo raised his left foot and lightly stepped on Wei Xiaobao’s head, while laughing coldly. Smelling the mud odor from the sole of his shoe, Wei Xiaobao was both frightened and angered; with the stinky shoe on his head, unexpectedly his brain also became muddled, in that instant he could not think of anything else. His eyes swept the hall randomly, trying to find something in that main hall with which he could provoke the toutuo. He only needed to talk some nonsense to divert Fat Toutuo’s attention, so that his concentration was somewhat broken, then the Shaolin monks would have the opportunity to help him. However, with his head underneath the toutuo’s foot, he could only look to one side of the courtyard outside. He saw a large stone turtle with a large vertical stone tablet on its back.

“Fat Reverend Monk,” Wei Xiaobao said, “Your dad is always crawling in the courtyard, with a tens-of-thousands-catty large stone pressing on his back, isn’t he suffering too much? You are not even trying to help him, you are really lacking of filial piety.”

“What do you mean my dad is crawling in the courtyard?” Fat Toutuo angrily said, “Your mouth is full of rubbish.”

Wei Xiaobao said, “That Forty-two-chapter Sutra, altogether there are eight copies, you only have one. Without obtaining the other seven copies, what good is the one you have?”

Fat Toutuo hastily asked, “Where are the other seven copies? Do you know?”

“Naturally I do,” Wei Xiaobao replied.

“Where are they?” Fat Toutuo asked, “Tell me quickly, if you don’t, I am going to crush your skull with my foot.”

“At first I did not know, but I found out about it just now,” Wei Xiaobao said.

“You have just found out about it?” Fat Toutuo asked in amazement, “What do you mean?”

Stretching out his neck, Wei Xiaobao looked at the stone tablet. The entire stone tablet was engraved with curvy seal-script characters, naturally Wei Xiaobao did not know it, he was just pretending to read aloud the inscription on the tablet. “The Forty-two-chapter Sutra,” he slowly read, “Altogether there are eight copies. The first copy is hidden in some temple on some mountain in Henan province. I do not recognize those several characters.”

“What characters?” Fat Toutuo asked. Seeing Wei Xiaobao was staring at the stone tablet in the courtyard, he asked in amazement, “You understand the inscription on that stone tablet?”

Wei Xiaobao did not pay him any attention, he read the inscription on the stone tablet with rapt attention, “The second copy is hidden in some Buddhist nun monastery on some mountain in Shanxi province. Pang Laoxiong [old fellow fat], I don’t recognize these several characters, the engraving is fuzzy, you are well-versed in both literature and martial art, why don’t you go and look at it yourself?”

Fat Toutuo believed him; he bent over to lift Wei Xiaobao up and brought him out of the hall’s door to look at the stone tablet. The writings on the stone tablet were actually in seal-script; if he said it was some writing, he himself did not recognize even a single character, but if he said it was not some writing, then what was engraved on the stone tablet?

He heard Wei Xiaobao continue reading, “The third copy is on some mountain in Sichuan? I don’t recognize that character either.”

Fat Toutuo had heard long ago that there were altogether eight copies of the Forty-two-chapter Sutra, and that one must have all eight copies to unleash their greatest usefulness. As for the location of the sutras, he did not have the slightest clue. Listening to Wei Xiaobao, he no longer had the slightest doubt; immediately he lifted up his foot and pulled him up and asked, “And where is the fourth copy?”

Wei Xiaobao squinted to gaze at the stone tablet, he leaned his head to the left, and then leaned it to the right, finally he shook his head and said, “I can’t figure it out.”

Fat Toutuo lifted him up and brought him three steps closer to the stone tablet. When they were near, his face showed an inquiring expression. Wei Xiaobao said, “My head is so itchy.”

“What?” Fat Toutuo asked.

“There’s flea in this temple,” Wei Xiaobao replied, “It went into my hair and bit me. Pang Laoxiong, please catch the flea for me. My scalp is unbearably itchy, I cannot see clearly.”

Fat Toutuo took off his hat and stretched out his huge palm, and with his five as-big-as-wooden-club fingers he scratched Wei Xiaobao’s hair. “Is it better?” he asked.

“No,” Wei Xiaobao said, “The flea bit me on the left part of my scalp, you were scratching the right part; the more you scratched, the itchier it becomes.” Therefore, Fat Toutuo scratched the left part of his scalp. Wei Xiaobao said, “Aiyo, the flea jumped onto my neck, did you see it?”

Fat Toutuo was fully aware that he was being mischievous, but he still relaxed his hand holding Wei Xiaobao’s wrist; only he placed his left hand lightly on Wei Xiaobao’s shoulder to prevent him from running away. “Just scratch it yourself!” he said.

“Aiyo!” Wei Xiaobao said, “This granny’s flea is so difficult to deal with, it must have not eaten human’s blood in three years. Originally it was short and fat, and now it is so starved that it turns thin and shriveled, hence it came here staking everything it has to make things difficult for laozi.” While saying that, he reached into his collar with his left hand and scratched vigorously.

Fat Toutuo knew Wei Xiaobao was cursing him as a flea in a roundabout way, but he pretended not to notice. “Where is the fourth copy hidden at?” he asked.

“Um, the fourth copy,” Wei Xiaobao said, “It is hidden in some mountain, Shao … Shaolin Temple’s Da … Da something courtyard?”

Fat Toutuo was shocked. “It is hidden in Shaolin Temple’s Damo Courtyard?” he asked.

Seeing he was very afraid of the eighteen Shaolin monks, and knowing that these Shaolin monks were from Damo Courtyard, Wei Xiaobao deliberately came out with this difficult problem; he wanted to play trick on him, thinking that even if he had an enormous courage, he would not dare to go to Shaolin Temple’s Damo Courtyard to steal the sutra. “Is that the character ‘mo’?” Wei Xiaobao asked, “I did not know it. Pang Laoxiong, you even know this difficult character, why should you tell me to read? Ah, I know, you are simply testing me. I am ashamed, on each line, there are several characters that I do not recognize.”

Fat Toutuo cast a sidelong glance toward the Shaolin monks, his expression showed trepidation and uncertainty; he asked, “And where is the fifth copy hidden at?”

Shaolin Temple was a major sect of the Wulin world. Wei Xiaobao had heard Hai Dafu mentioning it, who had also mentioned that the Empress Dowager pretended to be from Wudang Pai. In turn, the Empress Dowager had thought that Hai Dafu was from Kongtong Pai. Therefore, Wudang and Kongtong were also two major sects. Thereupon he said that the fifth and sixth copies were hidden separately on Wudang and Kongtong, two mountains. Fat Toutuo’s countenance turned uglier and uglier. Wei Xiaobao said that the seventh copy was obtained by the Mu Palace people of Yunnan, and the eighth was in some Xi Wang’s [west king] mansion. Bai Hanfeng had given him some trouble, so he was trying to even up by mentioning the Mu Palace. In Wu Sangui, Ping Xi Wang’s palace, there were martial art experts as many as the clouds, even his own Shifu was afraid of it, if Fat Toutuo was brazen enough to cause trouble, he would definitely suffer an enormous suffering.

To his surprise, however, Fat Toutuo’s countenance changed greatly as he asked, “Did you say the eighth copy is in Ping Xi Wang’s mansion?”

“I do not know this character,” Wei Xiaobao replied, “I am not sure if it is Ping Xi Wang.”

Fat Toutuo was angry; suddenly he exploded, “Rubbish! If not a thousand years old, this stone tablet is at least five hundred years; how old is Wu Sangui? How can an inscription of several hundred years ago mention Ping Xi Wang Wu Sangui?”

The stone tablet was jet-black, the stone tortoise and the stone tablet were covered with moss, the engraved inscriptions were worn out and badly damaged; one look at it, one would immediately know that this article was a several hundred year old antique. Wei Xiaobao did not understand this logic and hence he made idle talk trying to implicate Wu Sangui.

“Bad, bad!” he groaned inwardly. Trying to recover from his blunder he said, “I said I do not know that character, it was you who said ‘Ping Xi Wang’, perhaps in ancient times there was a Gou Xi Wang, Mao Xi Wang or even Wugui[1] Xi Wang in Yunnan. Pang Laoxiong, let me tell you this: these characters are squiggly, they are very difficult to recognize. If you know it, then you know it, if you don’t know it, then admit it. You pretend to know, yet you read something about Ping Xi Wang Wu Sangui. Here we have several great monks, each and every one of them is a man of learning and profound knowledge; you randomly read wrong characters, won’t you make them laugh at you till their mouths crooked?”

This speech actually made sense, making Fat Toutuo’s thin face immediately blushed deep red from ear to ear. He was not angry at all, but nodded his head and said, “I do not recognize even one word of these tadpole characters, so it is not Ping Xi Wang. What else is written below it?”

“What a close call!” Wei Xiaobao mused, “After rebuking him a little, I need to cover it up. I have to say a few nice things to make him happy. He changed the ‘Snake Island’ to ‘Divine Dragon Island’; he also knew the fat pig Liu Yan, most probably he is a member of Shen Long Jiao.” After cocking his head and looking at the stone tablet for half a day, he said, “The following seems to say ‘long life as heaven … heaven … heaven …’ heaven what?”

Fat Toutuo immediately looked tense, “Look carefully,” he said, “Long life as heaven what?”

“It looks like the character … the character … um, character ‘qi’ [even/level with]. Right, it must be ‘long-life is the same as the Heaven's’!”

Fat Toutuo was greatly delighted, he repeatedly rubbed his hands and said, “This sentence does exist. And then what?”

Wei Xiaobao pointed to the stone tablet and said, “These characters are really squiggly, they are hard to recognize. Ah right, this must me ‘Hong’ character, ‘Hong Jiaozhu’, three characters, and then there’s ‘Shen Long’ two characters! Look here, these are ‘shen tong guang da’, four characters [magical power is extensive].”

“Wow!” Fat Toutuo exclaimed loudly, he jumped up and down and said, “Hong Jiaozhu really has such good fortune, his long-life is the same as the Heaven's? It is written on this thousand years old stone tablet?”

Wei Xiaobao said, “On top of that, it is written that this is … this is a monument established by Tang Taizong Li Shimin[2], who sent Qin Shubao, Cheng Yaojin to erect it. It is clearly written on this stone tablet that during the Tang Dynasty, there was a military master called Xu Maogong, who knew events that happened a thousand years before and a thousand years after, who foretold that after a thousand years, during the Great Qing Dynasty, there will be Hong Jiaozhu of Shen Long Jiao, whose magical power is extensive and whose long-life is the same as the Heaven's.”

The storytellers in Yangzhou’s teahouses often narrated the stories of Sui and Tang dynasties, which he had heard many times. The names Cheng Yaojin and Xu Maogong were deeply etched in his mind. Actually Xu Maogong was the great general of the founding of the Tang Dynasty, Xu Ji, who shared the same fame as Li Jing[3], the (National) Duke of Ying Li Ji[4]; he was absolutely not an ox-nosed military master who pinched fingers and making calculation to know the past and the future; but how would Wei Xiaobao know about it? [Translator’s note: ox-nosed is a derogatory term to refer to Taoist priests.] He was simply trying to paint a living-spirit, living-image picture to swindle Fat Toutuo, to make him confused and disoriented, so that the eighteen Shaolin monks could seize the opportunity to save him. As for ‘Hong Jiaozhu’s magical power is extensive and his long-life is the same as the Heaven's’ and so on, he heard it in the big house of the Zhuang family, when Zhang Laosan and the other Shen Long Jiao people mentioning it. Sure enough, as soon as Fat Toutuo heard this, he grabbed his own head and scratched his own ears in infinite joy, his mouth was opened wide and he could not close it again.

---

[1] Gou, mao and wugui mean dog, cat, and turtle, respectively. Reminder: Ping Xi Wang means ‘king who pacifies the west’.

[2] Emperor Taizong, second emperor of Tang Dynasty, reigned 626-649.

[3] From the dictionary: Li Jing (570-649 AD), Tang Dynasty general and purported author of ‘Duke Li of Wei answering Emperor Taizong of Tang’, one of the Seven Military Classics of ancient China.

[4] He was awarded the imperial surname of Li by Gao Zu of Tang. Li Ji's fiefdom was called Yīng (英). 国公 (national duke) was a title awarded to the ruling clan as opposed to 民公 ('commoner' (non imperial) duke). [Courtesy of Ace High]

[foxs]

Wei Xiaobao said, “I wonder if there is something else written on the back of this big stone.”

“Yes!” Fat Toutuo said. He walked around to look at the back of the stone tablet.

Wei Xiaobao took a sudden big stride forward and jumped backward. Fat Toutuo was startled, and hastily reached out to grab. Four Shaolin monks from both sides simultaneously waved their palms to strike. Fat Toutuo did not have any choice but to send a fist to ward off. By this time Wei Xiaobao had already hidden behind the Shaolin monks. In an instant four more Shaolin monks stepped forward.

Eight Shaolin monks constantly circle around Fat Toutuo in fast motion, while their hands continuously sent out attack after attack. It did not matter if the attack hit the target or not, as soon as one strike failed, the next strike arrived. Sixteen hands struck from eight directions; obviously it was a well-trained formation. Fat Toutuo’s defense was very tight, but with one against eight, right away he sensed that he would not be able to endure.

‘Slap! Slap!’ a Shaolin monk exchanged palm strikes with Fat Toutuo. The Shaolin monk jumped out of the arena, another monk stepped in. After fighting for a while, Fat Toutuo’s leg was kicked. He stretched out his arms, made a turn, and forced the eight Shaolin monks to withdraw two steps back. “Hold on!” he called out.

Each one of the eight Shaolin monks took two more steps back. Fat Toutuo said, “Today the few are no match for the many, I’ll give the sutra back to you!” Reaching into his bosom, he took out the sutra.

Cheng Xin waved his left hand, the eight Shaolin monks took two steps forward, now they were less than three chi away from Fat Toutuo, each one poised for another strike. Fat Toutuo ignored them completely. He held out his hand with the sutra in it. Cheng Xin circulated the internal energy from his dantian several times, now his entire body was shielded with his inner strength. He put his three left fingers together in secret to guard against the follow-up attack. Only then did he stretch out his right hand to slowly receive the sutra.

Unexpectedly, Fat Toutuo did not make any move; he returned the sutra and then with a smile he said, “Cheng Xin Dashi, your eighteen luohan of Shaolin is world famous, eighteen of you beat me, one man; don’t you think it is rather lack of splendor?”

Cheng Xin put the sutra into his bosom, put his palms together, bowed and said, “Forgive our offense. In one-on-one combat, Shaolin monks are not the Fat Revered Monk’s match.” With a wave of his left hand, all the monks withdrew simultaneously. For fear that he would try to grab Wei Xiaobao again, five or six monks stood on guard in front of him.

“Benefactor Wei,” Fat Toutuo said, “I have an earnest request that I will ask you to please grant it to me.”

“What is it?” Wei Xiaobao asked.

“I want to invite you to the Divine Dragon Island,” Fat Toutuo replied, “To be our guest for several days.”

Wei Xiaobao was taken aback, “What?” he said, “You want me to go to the Divine Dragon Island? That kind of place …”

Fat Toutuo said, “The young benefactor’s sutra is in Cheng Xin Dashi’s hand, he will submit it to Shaolin Fangzhang. The young benefactor is coming to the Divine Dragon Island, our Cult people, from top to bottom, will definitely treat you with utmost respect. After you meet with Hong Jiaozhu, I will definitely send young benefactor out of the island safe and sound.”

He saw Wei Xiaobao was closing his mouth tight, obviously he did not believe him; thereupon he said, "Cheng Xin Dashi, I am asking you to be my witness. Have you ever known Fat Toutuo said something but not doing it?"

Cheng Xin knew that although this toutuo's conduct was rather heretical and presumptuous, he was not significantly evil. The fact that fat and thin, two toutuo had always fulfilled their promise, he had indeed heard about it long ago. He said, "The fact that Fat Revered Monk is trustworthy is widely known. It's just that Benefactor Wei has a very important matter to attend, I am afraid he won't have time to go to the Divine Dragon Island."

"That's right," Wei Xiaobao said, "I am extremely busy. When I have time in the future, I will go to the Divine Dragon Island to visit Fat Revered Monk and Hong Jiaozhu."

Fat Toutuo hastily said, "You should have said Hong Jiaozhu and his, the Senior's, subordinate Fat Toutuo. First, there is no one in the world may rank above him, the Senior. By saying other people's name first before mentioning Hong Jiaozhu is highly disrespectful."

"What about the Emperor?" Wei Xiaobao asked.

Fat Toutuo replied, "Naturally Hong Jiaozhu first, the Emperor behind him. Second, in the presence of Jiaozhu, the Senior, you must not mention 'Revered Monk' or 'Taoist Master'[1]. In this entire world, only Hong Jiaozhu deserves to be revered."

Wei Xiaobao stuck out his tongue and said, "Hong Jiaozhu is so formidable, I do not dare to meet him even more."

Fat Toutuo said, "Hong Jiaozhu is benevolent and loving, his kindness covers the whole world. Toward a brilliant and clever young hero like young benefactor, the Senior is sure to be absolutely thrilled. If the young benefactor goes to the Divine Dragon Island, you will definitely return from a rewarding journey. The Senior, Jiaozhu, is very generous, it goes without saying. Perhaps when the Senior is happy, he would teach you a move or half a style; henceforth the young benefactor will be able to reap endless benefit when you are roaming the world."

He was speaking very sincerely, fervently and passionately. At first he did not even consider Wei Xiaobao worthy in his eyes, he even stepped on his head, but now his speech was full of 'young benefactor' and 'a brilliant and clever young hero'. Afraid that Wei Xiaobao could not hear him clearly, he bent his bamboo-pole-like body and spoke next to his ear.

Wei Xiaobao recalled Tao Hongying's story, and remembered seeing the action of Zhang Laosan and the other at the Zhuang home; he also remembered the Empress Dowager and Liu Yan, and the appearance of the fake palace maid, the man who dressed as a woman. In short, he had an unspeakable disgust toward Shen Long Jiao. Comparatively speaking, among the Shen Long Jiao people, Fat Toutuo still had several part of lofty quality as a hero. But after using force to rob the sutra and carrying Wei Xiaobao here and there, now suddenly his manner changed completely, he wanted to invite him as a guest to the Divine Dragon Island, Wei Xiaobao was certain that Fat Toutuo was harboring some malicious intentions. Right now he was speaking politely, but it must be because he was no match for the Shaolin monks. As soon as the Shaolin monks left, he would definitely resort to violence again, and then who would be able to put him under control? Thereupon Wei Xiaobao shook his head and said, "I am not going!"

Fat Toutuo's thin face looked extremely dejected. Slowly he straightened up his body, and cast a glance toward the eighteen Shaolin monks surrounding him. "Young benefactor," he said slowly, "In your opinion, how is my martial art compared to these eighteen great monks?"

"Each has its strong points," Wei Xiaobao said.

"What do you mean each has its strong points?" Fat Toutuo angrily said, "If we fight one on one, do you think they can beat me?"

Wei Xiaobao replied, "One on one, perhaps you will win. One against eighteen, you will definitely lose. This is what I mean by each has its strong points. If one on one and you still lose, you don't have any farting points! Your only strong point is that you are taller than they are."

Fat Toutuo smiled and said, "Have you seen anybody else with martial art skill as superior as mine?"

"Of course I have!" Wei Xiaobao replied, "Your martial art skill is just so-so, I have seen not a few people whose martial art skill is ten times better than yours."

Fat Toutuo was angry; he jumped one step forward with stretched arm to grab him. Four Shaolin monks simultaneously stretched out their palms to block. Fat Toutuo said, "Name those people whose martial art is superior to mine."

Momentarily Wei Xiaobao was at a loss for words; he could not remember seeing anybody whose martial art skill was higher than his. His own Shifu's martial art skill was extremely high, but he could not necessarily beat him.

Fat Toutuo was very smug, he said, "You see, you can't name even one, can you?"

"What do you mean I can't name one?" Wei Xiaobao said, "I just don't want to tell you, for fear you might be really frightened. There are so many people whose martial art skill is higher than yours. The first one is Tian Di Hui's Zongduozhu Chen Jinnan. I have seen him fighting in Beijing, with his pair of hands he caught four toutuo, each toutuo weighs more than two hundred catties. With just a kick of his legs, he was able to jump over the city wall. If you fight with him, the difference is way too far."

"Humph," Fat Toutuo snorted. He had also heard the name of Chen Jinnan, but did not believe that he was able to jump over the city wall carrying four people. "Braggart!" he said.

"The second person whose martial art is superior," Wei Xiaobao continued, "Is a sweet, tender-footed young mistress." Speaking to this point, he cast a glance toward Shuang'er. Shuang'er repeatedly shook her hand, telling him not to continue. But Wei Xiaobao continued, "One time this young mistress fought thirty-six Wudang's Taoist priests. Thirty-six priests surrounded her, using ... using some sort of formation."

Fat Toutuo asked, "About that Wudang Pai's formation, were they barehanded or using swords?"

"Using swords," Wei Xiaobao replied.

"That must be Zhenwu[2] Sword Formation," Fat Toutuo said.

"That's right," Wei Xiaobao said, "Pang Dashi [great master fat] is experienced and knowledgeable, you know about Zhenwu Sword Formation. At that time those thirty-six swords surrounded the young mistress, the swords flickered that even water could not splash through. The young mistress had a child in her left hand, her right hand was unarmed ..."

Fat Toutuo was greatly amazed. "She fought Wudang Pai with a child in her left hand?" he asked.

"What's so strange about it?" Wei Xiaobao said, "Actually, she was carrying two little babies, both were boys, they were very fat ..." He deliberately exaggerated the martial art skill of the young mistress of the Zhuang family, so he doubled the number of child in her arm. He said, " ... with her mouth she was soothing the babies: 'Two sweet babies, don't cry, watch your mama doing some tricks', while seizing the swords in those thirty-six priests hands and sealed those priests' acupoints, so that all of them were frozen in place, just like clay Bodhisattva, without able to move at all. Carrying the babies, the young mistress let them grab the old priests' beard. The old priests stared in anger, but the two babies were laughing very happily."

Wudang Pai and Shaolin Pai were equally famous, their martial art went back for a thousand years; Wei Xiaobao knew this. He saw how Fat Toutuo was not able to defeat the eighteen Shaolin monks, so he said that that young mistress was able to overpower thirty-six Taoist priests. Whose martial art strong, whose martial art weak, he did not have to talk too much.

Listening to him, Fat Toutuo stared blankly like he suddenly lost his mind. He sighed and said, "Unexpectedly there is such magical martial art in the world!"

Seeing surprisingly he believed his lie, Wei Xiaobao was very proud of himself. He said, "I am not concealing anything from you, this young mistress is my own godmother."

When he started talking about Jiangnan's young mistress, Shuang'er thought that he was talking about the Third Mistress; but then later he mentioned that the young mistress had a pair of twin boys, plus she was Wei Xiaobao's godmother, hence she realized he was talking about someone else. But Fat Toutuo was shocked. "Your godmother?" he asked, "What's her surname? There is such a formidable figure in Wulin, yet how come I have never heard about it?"

Wei Xiaobao laughed and said, "There are plentiful formidable figures in Wulin. Take my wife here for example," he pointed to Shuang'er, "As you can see, she is petite, cute and exquisite looking; how do you know she knew martial art?"

Shuang'er blushed; she said, "Xianggong, don't talk nonsense."

Fat Toutuo had had some exchange with Shuang'er, this kind of petite lady, surprisingly her skill was quite amazing; were it not for him personally witnessing it, it would be hard for him to believe. He nodded and said, "You are right. Since the young benefactor is unwilling to visit the Divine Dragon Island, there's nothing I can do. Gentlemen, please!"

Wei Xiaobao said, "Dashi, you first!" He appeared to be polite, but actually he wanted Fat Toutuo to leave first; if he went to the east, then Wei Xiaobao would go to the west, if he went to the north, then Wei Xiaobao would go to the south.

Fat Toutuo shook his head and said, "Young benefactor, please go first. I want to make a rubbing of the inscription engraved on this stone tablet."

Wei Xiaobao laughed inwardly, thinking that his wild talk was unexpectedly believed as the truth.

Book note:

1. The content of the title of this chapter was from careful research of ancient poetry, its level and oblique tones (technical term for classical Chinese rhythmic poetry) is different from contemporary form of strict poetic form with eight lines of 5, 6 or 7 syllables and even lines rhyming.
2. Four empresses of Shunzhi. Empress Duan Jing, whose maiden name was Donggo, and Empress Xiao Kang, Kangxi's birth mother, were buried together as husband and wives to show filial piety. Empress Fei[3] and Empress Xiao Hui (the 'Empress Dowager' in our book) were separately buried in the Xiao Dong Ling [Eastern Qing Tombs]. 'Xiao Kang' and 'Xiao Hui' were posthumous titles granted during the reigns of Emperors Yongzheng and Qianlong. The titles were not known during Kangxi's reign. But popular fiction does not need to follow such a strict compliance to historical facts.
3. The matter of Shunzhi leaving home to become a monk on Mount Wutai was a widely spread folklore during the Qing Dynasty. It was known as one of the 'Four Qing Mysteries' [or 'doubtful cases']. The other three mysteries were: Shunzhi's Empress Dowager married a regent later on, Yongzheng's got his first wife by force, Qianlong actually came from Chen family in Haining [county level city in Jiaxing, Zhejiang province]. According to official record, Shunzhi died of smallpox; however, there are too many doubtful points in the official record, to such an extent that people of later generation could only guess what had really happened. A great poet of early Qing Dynasty, Wu Meichun wrote four-stanza poem 'Mount Qing Liang's Poem of Praise to Buddha'. It is definitely related to Consort Donggo. Quite a number of people believe that because of his grief over his beloved concubine's death, Shunzhi has left home to become a Buddhist monk on Mount Wutai. The poem says, 'There's a high mountain in the northwest, people say it's the Wenshu [Manjushri] Platform. On the platform there's a bright moon pond, where thousand-leaf golden lotus blooms, the blossoms reflecting each other's shadow, the leaves grow together with the root. The queen mother carries Shuang Cheng [double success?], the green canopy reaches to the cloud (note: Shuang Cheng points to female fairy Dong Shuang Cheng). The Han Lord sits on the Palace of Buddhist teaching, he hesitates as soon as exposed to the light. Binding the hearts together, giving away nine ornamental hairpins ... hand in hand neglecting the greatest news, extreme happiness gives birth to minuscule sorrow. Loneliness of a thousand autumns ended, who will wholeheartedly accompany me today? ... ' (It was said that while Consort Donggo received special favor from Shunzhi; Shunzhi's own life was inconsistently tragic. The entire poem was very long, it will not be copied here in its entirety). 'Wounded heart is frightened by the cold wind, deep in the Palace the crickets chirp. Severe frost covers the jasper tree, hibiscus withered from the core. It's a pity a thousand li grass, withered away losing its color.' (note: 'thousand-li grass' [千里草] are characters form the 'Dong' [董] character, referring to the death of Consort Donggo.) ... 'The south-facing storehouse stretches to the grave (referring to Cao Cao's [famous statesman and general at the end of Han, the main villain of the novel 'Romance of Three Kingdoms'] son who died prematurely in infancy, King Deng Ai, Cao Cangshu [Cangshu means 'stretched storehouse'], a comparison to Prince Rong), covering the face, adding to the broken heart. Abstain from words, feed my horse with grain, roaming the eight extremities.' (It was told that when his beloved concubine passed away, Shunzhi's innermost being was so sorrowful that he was thinking of leaving the mortal world). 'The eight extremities is boundless, it is pointing to the Qing Liang Mountain. This mountain stores up deities, noble spirits to examine the wrong ... Famous mountain initially looks at the good fortune, accepting instruction to release the way of the well-being, preparing to sprinkle seven Buddhist earthen jars from the highest peak ... From the seat of a celestial being, breathing out air like silken sandalwood. Sending words to the Han Emperor, is it worth the trouble to remain in the mortal world? ... Only a broad mind, like a rock, will never be published. Hereby protecting the golden wheel, the law of the ocean has no billows (talking about Shunzhi's aspiration to go to Mount Wutai). Tasting and hearing the solemn Son of Heaven, six hired hands cover ten thousand li ... magnificent concubine's ailment cannot be saved, waving the whip, tears flow like water. Han Emperor like an immortal, his wife considers getting rid of her slippers ... favoring instead to seize the government power of the long gate, graciousness leans to the Qing city. Magnificent jade decorating the night, heartache and grief like the mourning cicada. None of the sufferings does not have a death side to it, to have the power of commanding the morning sun to rise ... maintaining the propriety toward the ruler, virtuous sage to set the course. Taking part in the way does not need the brilliance of the ruler, declining meritorious deed promising disgrace, empty appearance cannot be repeated, like packing up a reservoir of the wind.' (Toward the ruler points to Sakyamuni Buddha. Attributed to his conversion to the Dharma, seeking relief by Zen Buddhism).
4. When he was on the throne, Shunzhi has already taken Yulin as his master in the study of Buddhism. From Yulin's chronicle as the teacher of the state: in the Shunzhi's sixteenth year, the 'forefather of the world' asked the master to bestow a name, the master offered more than ten characters, the 'forefather of the world' picked the character 'chi' [imbecile/sentimental/stupid/foolish], in conjunction with the character 'Xing', which was handed down by forefather of Zen Buddhism's sect of Long Chi [dragon pond], and thus his Buddhist name was 'Xing Chi'. Yulin himself was of the 'Tong' [go through/pass] generation, his name was 'Tong Xiu' ['xiu' means jade], Yulin [yulin means jade forest]; therefore, his disciples used the 'Xing' [to walk/to go/to travel] as their generation name.

---

[1] Orig. 'Zhen Ren' - lit. 'real man', a term of respect to address a Taoist priest.

[2] Lord of profound heaven, major Taoist deity.

[3] From Wikipedia: Demoted Empress Suoerna, from the Borjigit clan, niece of Xiao Zhuang Grand Imperial Dowager Empress, demoted in 1653.

[foxs]

Chapter 19 - Nine divisions[1] amass metal to be cast in a row, hundred-gold set up timber to provoke a flock of devils.
(Translated by Foxs)

LuDingJi-19.jpg

Wei Xiaobao looked at the painting and calligraphy on the wall, but he did not recognize a single character. Shaking his head he said, "This calligraphy is not too good." Mr. Lu felt a deep veneration as he asked for directions on the faulty stroke and weak points of the calligraphy. "There are too many faulty strokes, there are too little superb strokes!" Wei Xiaobao said.

[1] Referring to administrative division of China during earliest dynasties, or ancient China.

[foxs]

The eighteen Shaolin monks, along with Wei Xiaobao and Shuang’er, went down the Jin Xiu Peak. Cheng Xin returned the sutra to Wei Xiaobao; he asked, “Will Benefactor return to Beijing immediately?”

“Yes,” Wei Xiaobao replied.

Cheng Xin said, “I received Yulin Dashi’s request to escort Benefactor until you arrive safely to the Capital.”

Wei Xiaobao was greatly delighted, “That’s wonderful,” he said, “I was worrying that that bamboo-pole toutuo is not willing to give up and thus will come again to give me trouble. But if you all come with me, will someone protect Xing Chi Dashi?”

“Benefactor may set your heart at ease,” Cheng Xin said, “Yulin Dashi has other arrangement.”

Now Wei Xiaobao was in complete admiration toward the old monk Yulin. He was always sitting in meditation with his eyes closed, so much so that he would not even care if the sky collapsed, but without a word or movement, he had made appropriate arrangement for everything in secret. With the Shaolin’s Eighteen Lohan escorting him, there was no danger whatsoever along the way. Not only the tall and thin Fat Toutuo did not appear, they did not even meet a single Wulin character along the way.

One day they arrived outside Beijing. The eighteen Shaolin monks bade their farewell to Wei Xiaobao. Cheng Xin said, “Benefactor has arrived at the Capital, the old monk and my brothers say our goodbye to return to our temple.”

Wei Xiaobao said, “All the great monks have bore suffering to escort me to this place, I … I really can’t thank you enough, please accept my deepest respect.” While saying that, he kneeled down to kowtow.

Cheng Xin busily helped him up, saying, “Along the way, Benefactor has treated us very well. From Shanxi to Beijing we were roaming the mountain playing on the water [i.e. going on a scenic tour], where is the suffering?”

What happened was that as soon as they left Mount Wutai, Wei Xiaobao immediately hired nineteen large carriages. He and Shuang’er rode on one, each one of the eighteen Shaolin monks rode on one carriage. He ordered Yu Ba, on a fast horse, to go ahead of them, a day in advance, to arrange the lodging along the way, preparing tea, delicacies, vegetarian dishes, etc. Everything was top-notch. On each place they stopped, Wei Xiaobao always splurged on tips, so that the shopkeeper and the attendants treated the eighteen Shaolin monks as if they were deities Bodhisattva. Shaolin monks exercise self-control and lead ascetics life, they do not seek after these food and drink, but seeing Wei Xiaobao treated them with respect and looked very sincere, inevitably they were quite happy. Although Wei Xiaobao was glib-tongued, his natural disposition was friendly, easy to make friends, and contrary to what one might expect, he was sincere towards his friends. Along the way he chatted with the monks and got along very well with them. Now that suddenly they have to say good-bye, his heart ached and he could not stop the tears from flowing down.

“Shanzai, shanzai! [good, peace]” Cheng Xin said, “Why is young benefactor grieving? If there’s karma, another day you can visit us at Shaolin Temple and we can chat.”

With a sob Wei Xiaobao said, “Indeed I must come.”

By the time Cheng Xin and the other monks had left and they entered the city, it was already late in the evening, hence it was inappropriate to enter the Palace. Wei Xiaobao went to a large inn at the Xizhimen[1] district, the ‘Ru Gui[2] Inn’. He asked for the best room, planning to spend the night there, and see Kangxi the next day, to report everything. He thought, “That thin and annoying Fat Toutuo is desperate to get his hand on my sutra, maybe he is still following me in secret. The eighteen Shaolin monks have already left, if he came back to get it by force, Shuang’er and I would not be able to stop him. I had better work a little bit to hide the sutra first. Tomorrow when I get to the Palace, I can take a large group of Imperial Bodyguards here to get it, then present it to the young emperor. This is called ‘not one in ten thousand failures’ [wan shi wu yi]!”

Thereupon he ordered Yu Ba to make preparation and sent Shuang’er out of the room, bolted the door and closed the window, before making sure that Fat Toutuo was not peeking outside. And then he wrapped the sutra in oilcloth, pulled the table, took out his dagger, and cut a hole on the brick floor underneath the table. The dagger was able to cut iron like mud, naturally it could cut mud effortlessly. After putting the sutra inside the hole, he put the brick back and mixing ash and water, he spread the paste over the brick slit. When the paste was dry, no one would ever find it unless one was deliberately looking for it.

Early in the morning the next day, he ordered Yu Ba to hire a carriage, he wanted to take Shuang’er for a sumptuous light breakfast first. He wanted to spend a lot of money to let this little servant girl broaden her outlook. Afterwards, he needed to buy a set of eunuch clothes and hat before entering the Palace. But buying eunuch clothes and hat in the marketplace was not really easy. If he could not buy one, he thought he would wear Imperial Bodyguard uniform and a yellow Magua on top of it, then he would look very impressive as he swaggered into the Palace. Wouldn’t it be interesting to see the Imperial Bodyguards and the eunuchs’ dumbstruck expression when they see him? After all, his Deputy Chief of Imperial Bodyguards was bestowed personally by His Majesty, was it not? He said in his heart, “With this idea, why would I toil myself to become an eunuch? That’s it, Laozi will enter the Palace wearing the yellow Magua.”

With Shuang’er he climbed into the carriage, bent his tongue, and spoke in Beijing accent, “We’ll go to the ol’ Kuixing [the great bear constellation] Shop in Xidan[3] first. Their deep-fried sheep tail and mutton dumpling are not bad at all.”

“Yes!” the carriage driver respectfully said.

With a straight back Yu Ba sat by the carriage driver. “Hey,” he said, “In the Capital, even the mule is standing out from the masses, not even one of such a pitch-black mule with large eyes can be found within our Shanxi province.”

As he returned to the Capital, Wei Xiaobao’s heart had a different feeling of self-satisfaction.

After traveling for a while, the carriage suddenly went out of Xizhimen. Wei Xiaobao said, “Hey, we are going to Xidan, why are we going out of town?”

“Yes,” the cart driver said, “I am sorry Daye [big master]! Xiaoren’s mule is stubborn, when we reach the city gate, he always wants to slip out of town.”

Wei Xiaobao and Shuang’er laughed. Yu Ba said, “Hey, in the Capital, even the mules are putting on official airs.”

As the large carriage left the city gate, it travelled straight to the north. After about a li, it still had not turned back. Wei Xiaobao knew something was amiss; he said sternly, “Driver, what trick are you playing? Quickly go back!”

The driver repeatedly said yes, he shouted, “Go back, mule, hu, hu, mule, go back!” The cart driver lashed his whip randomly, but the mule forcefully ran to the north, it bolted faster and faster. The cart driver cursed, “Damn it stinky mule, I told you to go back! Mule, stop, stop! Your granny’s bastard mule!” His shout became more and more urgent, but how could the mule be willing to stop?

Right this moment, there was sound of horse’s hoof, two riders from the side rushed over and rode close to the mule carriage. The riders were two tall and sturdy men. In a low voice Wei Xiaobao said, “Make your move!”

Shuang’er leaned forward and stretched out her finger to poke the middle of the cart driver’s back. His body swayed, he fell down from the carriage with a loud cry, and was trampled by the rider head on. The rider flew up and landed on the carriage driver’s seat. Shuang’er stretched out her finger again. The man turned his hand around to catch her wrist. Shuang’er flipped her palm and slapped his face. The man parried with his left palm, while trying to grab her shoulder with his right hand.

The two of them exchanged eight, nine moves, while the mule was still running fast. The rider on the left called out, “What happened? Why are you still playing?”

‘Bang!’ the man on the carriage got hit by Shuang’er right palm on the pit of his stomach, he fell down. The other man raised his whip to strike. Shuang’er reached out and caught the whip and in one fluid motion wound it around the carriage. The mule carriage was rushing forward, the whip was pulled, the man was immediately thrown down from the horse that he hastily let go of the whip and let out a loud ‘wah wah’ cry.

Shuang’er picked up the reins. She did not know how to drive a cart, so she handed it over to Yu Ba and said, “You drive the cart.”

“I … this I can’t,” Yu Ba said.

Wei Xiaobao jumped onto the driver seat, and took over the taut rope; he did not know how to drive cart either, but he imitated the cart driver’s ‘mule, mule’ calls, left hand loosened the reins, right hand tightened it, just like riding a horse. As expected, the mule turned around; where had the stubbornness gone?

They heard another sound of horse’s hoof, a dozen or more riders rushed over. Wei Xiaobao was greatly alarmed, he pulled the mule that the cart swerved in an oblique angle. The riders also turned their horse to pursue from behind. The horses were fast, the carriage was slow, not too long afterwards, those dozen or so riders had surrounded the mule cart.

Seeing each one of the horse riders was holding a weapon, Wei Xiaobao called out, “Under the bright sunny sky, near the throne of the Son of Heaven, you want to cut our way and rob us?”

A man said with a laugh, “We are envoys to invite you to dinner, not to rob you. Wei Gongzi, our master is inviting you to drink several cups of wine!”

Wei Xiaobao was startled. “Who is your master?” he asked.

The man replied, “As soon as Gongzi see him, you will naturally recognize him. If our master is not Gongzi’s friend, why would he invite you to drink wine?”

Seeing these men acted strange, Wei Xiaobao knew that most likely they were harboring ill intentions. “How can there be such invitation?” he called out, “Excuse me, let me pass!”

Another man laughed and said, “Let you pass? We’ll let you pass, then!” Raising the saber in his hand, he chopped the mule’s head; the mule’s body swayed sideways and fell to the ground, pulling the carriage along with it. Wei Xiaobao and Shuang’er hurriedly leaped down. Shuang’er moved like the wind, it’s just that the enemies were on horsebacks, while she was short, so she could not reach the enemies. One by one she jabbed with her finger, if not the horse’ eyes, then the acupoints on those men’s legs. Instantly there was a clamor of horses neighing in confusion. Several men jumped down from their horses, they charged forward with brandished sabers. Shuang’er was extremely agile and nimble, poking to the east striking to the west, she knocked down seven, eight men. The remaining four or five men looked at each other in dismay, at a loss of what to do.

On the main road a small carriage galloped over, a woman’s voice from the carriage called out, “We are on the same side, don’t fight!”

As soon as Wei Xiaobao heard the voice, his heart blossomed and his anger subsided. “Aha!” he called out, “My wife is here!”

Shuang'er and the men immediately stopped fighting. Shuang'er was greatly puzzled, she did not expect this xianggong had already had young mistress. But at that time, marrying too early was prevalent, it was not uncommon for a fourteen, fifteen years old man to get married, it's just that Wei Xiaobao had never told her that he had a wife.

The small carriage arrived, from inside jumped a person, it was none other than Fang Yi. Wei Xiaobao was grinning from ear to ear, he stepped forward and pulled her hand, saying, "Good Jiejie, I miss you very much, where have you been?"

Fang Yi smiled and said, "We'll talk about it later. Why did you fight each other?" She saw a lot of men were lying on the ground, the mule's blood splattered everywhere; she was quite stunned.

A man bowed and said, "Miss Fang, we are here to invite Wei Gongzi for a drink, I suppose our manner was not satisfactory and we have offended Gongzi. If Miss Fang could invite him personally, it would be best."

Fang Yi was amazed, "Did you knock these people down?" she asked, "Your martial art skill must have been increased a hundred-fold."

"Even if I made progress, it wouldn't be this quick," Wei Xiaobao replied, "It was Miss Shuang'er who protected me. She is young, but her skill is prominent."

Fang Yi turned toward Shuang'er. Noticing Shuang'er was about thirteen, fourteen years of age, with gentle and shy appearance, she did not believe her martial art skill to be this superior. "Meimei, what's your surname?" she asked. When she was at the Zhuang's house, she did not see Shuang'er at all, therefore, the two of them did not know each other.

Shuang'er stepped forward, kneeled down and kowtowed, saying, "Your maid servant Shuang'er is paying her respect to the Young Mistress." Wei Xiaobao burst out in laughter.

Fang Yi was so embarrassed that her entire face turned red; hastily she dodged and said, "You ... what did you call me? I ... I'm ... not."

Shuang'er stood up and said, "Xianggong said that you are his wife, your maid servant is serving Xianggong, naturally I am calling you Young Mistress."

Fang Yi cast a vicious glance toward Wei Xiaobao; she said, "This man's mouth always talks nonsense, don't believe him. How long have you been serving him? Don't tell me you do not know his character by now. I am Miss Fang."

Shuang'er showed a faint smile and said, "In that case I won't call you that for now, but someday I will."

"Someday you will call me wh ..." Fang Yi started, but then she blushed again, and swallowed the last word 'what'.

Shuang'er looked at Wei Xiaobao, he was having an immensely proud of himself expression on his face, suddenly Shuang'er also blushed. She remembered how at Mount Wutai he had also told Fat Toutuo that she was his wife. Turned out he had this habit of calling young ladies his wives. So that when she heard him laughing and then asking, "How's my young wife?" Shuang'er did not think differently.

Fang Yi cast him another malicious look; she said, "We have not seen each other for such a long time, as soon as we meet, you did not speak decent words, but act garrulously instead." Immediately she ordered the men to tidy up to continue on their journey. These men's acupoints were sealed by Shuang'er, they were unable to move a single step, hence Shuang'er had to release them one by one.

Wei Xiaobao laughed and said, "If I had known that you are inviting me for a drink, I would have wished I could grow wings and fly to you."

Fang Yi cast him another malicious look; she said, "You have already forgotten me, naturally you would not have thought that I am inviting you."

Wei Xiaobao felt sweetness in his heart; he said, "How can I forget you? If I had known you are looking for me, forget about drinking wine, even if you want me to drink horse's pee or poison, I would willingly come, without the slightest delay."

Fang Yi's pair of beautiful eyes gazed at him; she said, "Don't just say things that are good to hear, what if I really want you to go to the ends of the earth and drink poison?"

Wei Xiaobao saw that when she said those words, her expression was like smiling, yet she was not smiling, under the morning sun she looked unspeakably gorgeous; he felt his whole body was comfortably warm. He said, "Let's not mention the ends of the earth, even go up the mountain of blades or go down a deep fryer, I would still go."

"Alright," Fang Yi said, "A real man gave his words, some horses cannot chase it."

Wei Xiaobao slapped his own chest and loudly exclaimed, "A real man gave his words, some horses cannot chase it." The two of them burst out in laughter.

Fang Yi ordered a man to get a horse for Wei Xiaobao to ride, she let Shuang'er sit on her own little carriage, while she rode another horse and travelled side-by-side with Wei Xiaobao. Facing the morning sun, they let their horses gallop leisurely. The men followed behind them.

---

[1] Xizhimen neighborhood of Beijing, the main northwest gate of Beijing.

[2] Ru gui means ‘as if returning’.

[3] Xidan neighborhood of central Beijing.

[foxs]

Fang Yi said, "Your talent is really good, you managed to pick such a powerful flower, obtaining a servant girl with such superior martial art skill."

Wei Xiaobao laughed and said, "What do you mean picking such a powerful flower? It was her who is most willing to follow me." Wei Xiaobao then asked about Mu Jianping, Xu Tianchuan and the others' whereabouts. "In that haunted house," he said, "You were captured by those Shen Long Jiao fellows. Afterwards, how did you escape? Was it the Third Mistress of the Zhuang Family who sent people to help you?"

"Who's the Third Mistress of the Zhuang Family?" Fang Yi asked.

"She is the master of the Zhuang house," Wei Xiaobao replied.

Fang Yi shook her head, "Master of the Zhuang house?" she asked, "All along we did not meet anybody. Shen Long Jiao only want you, but they did not have any ill-intention toward you. When that Zhang Laosan failed to find you, he let us go. Xiao Junzhu and the others are ahead of us, very soon you will be able to see them." Turning her head toward him, there was a sullen look on her face as she said, "In your heart you only have Xiao Junzhu; we have only met for a short time, yet you have already asked about her seven, eight times."

Wei Xiaobao laughed, "When did I ask you seven or eight times?" he said, "I have really suffered injustice. If I saw her but did not see you, by this time I would have asked her seventy, eighty times."

Fang Yi smiled and said, "Even if you grew ten mouths, you would not be able to ask seventy, eighty times in such a short time. But knowing you, one mouth is more formidable than ten mouths."

The two of them chatting and joking, in a short while they already travelled more than ten li, winding around Beijing's city wall, and went straight to the east. "Are we almost there?" Wei Xiaobao asked.

Fang Yi looked hurt, "It's still far away," she said, "Even if you are anxious to see Xiao Junzhu, you don't have to be this impatient. If I had known it, it would have been much better to let her to come and pick you up, so that you wouldn't be deeply worried."

Wei Xiaobao stuck out his tongue and said, "Henceforth I won't ask another word."

Fang Yi said, "Your mouth won't ask, but your heart is anxious; you will make me angry even more."

It appeared that her vinegar [jealousy] was getting thicker; the more Wei Xiaobao listened, the happier he was. He laughed and said, "If I have just half a part of anxiety in my heart, I am not your husband, but your son."

"Pfft!" Fang Yi stifled her laughter; she said, "Good ..." her face turned red, she could not push the following word 'son' out of her mouth.

They travelled until noon, when they arrived at a small town to take a rest before continuing their journey to the east. Wei Xiaobao did not dare to ask where they were going anymore, he realized they had left Beijing far behind, and that he would not have time to hurry back to the Palace to see Kangxi that day, but he thought, "Xiao Xuanzi did not tell me when I should be back anyway, I could be delayed on Mount Wutai, or was captured and detained by that Fat Toutuo. What's the harm in returning to the Palace several days late?"

Along the way Fang Yi kept him company by having idle talks with him. When they were together in the Imperial Palace, although the two of them were in the same room, a third person, Mu Jianping, was also present, so that Fang Yi was quite reserved. This time they were riding slowly side-by-side, she was talking and laughing eagerly and attentively. The rest of their party were being tactful, they lagged quite far behind.

Wei Xiaobao was at the stage of 'first awakening of love'. When he called her 'his wife' at the Palace, he was 60% joking, 30% being frivolous and taking advantage of her precarious situation, only 10% was being driven by faint attraction between opposite sexes. Today they met again after separation, seeing sometimes Fang Yi was annoyed and angry, sometimes she was talking and laughing tenderly, Wei Xiaobao could not help but was aroused by passion. He saw after riding for most of the day, her cheeks were flushed, tiny beads of sweat appeared on her face, she looked unspeakably dainty and cute. He could not help but staring at her with a blank expression on his face.

Fang Yi laughed and said, "Why are you staring with blank expression like that?"

"Good Jiejie," Wei Xiaobao said, "You ... you look really pretty. I think ... I think ..."

"What are you thinking?" Fang Yi asked.

Wei Xiaobao said, "If I tell you, you must not get angry."

"If you are speaking properly, I won't get angry," Fang Yi said, "But if you are being indecent, naturally I will get angry. What are you thinking?"

"I think, if you really become my wife, I don't know how much happier I will be," Wei Xiaobao said.

Fang Yi cast him a sidelong glance with a wooden face, and then turned her head away. Wei Xiaobao anxiously said, "Good Jiejie, are you angry?"

"Naturally I am angry," Fang Yi said, "I am a hundred and twenty percent angry."

Wei Xiaobao said, "But nothing could be more proper than this, I ... I spoke very sincerely."

Fang Yi said, "In the Palace, I have already made an oath; I will follow you for the rest of my life, I will serve you. Do you think that was real, or fake? By saying that, aren't you thinking to cease being faithful?"

Wei Xiaobao was ecstatic; if not for the fact that both of them were on horsebacks, he would embrace her immediately and kiss her tender and beautiful, desirable face. Immediately he stretched out his right hand to pull her left hand, saying, "How can I cease being faithful? A thousand years, ten thousand years, I will never cease to be faithful."

"You are clearly lying," Fang Yi said, "How can a man live for a thousand years, ten thousand years? Unless you are a turtle ..." When speaking the word 'turtle', she broke into laughter, and turned her head away, but she still let him holding her hand.

Holding her soft, warm and tender palm, Wei Xiaobao's heart was bursting with joy. He laughed and said, "With you treating me this well, I will never be a turtle." When one's wife is having an affair with another man, then the husband becomes a 'turtle'; Fang Yi also understood this sense of pride.

With a sweet face she said, "Not three sentences of good words, a dog's mouth will never grow ivory."

Wei Xiaobao laughed, "If you marry a chicken follow the chicken, if you marry a dog follow the dog," he said, "If you wish to see your husband grow ivory in this lifetime, it will be very hard to come by." Fang Yi bent over the saddle in laughter, her left hand tightly gripped his palm.

The two of them chatting and laughing all the way until evening, when they lodged for the night in a large inn in a rather large town. The next morning Wei Xiaobao ordered Yu Ba to hire a large carriage, so that he could ride with Fang Yi inside. The conversation between them was thick with passion. Wei Xiaobao embraced her waist and kissed her face. Fang Yi did not resist, but she categorically forbade him to overstep the boundary. In the matter between male and female, actually Wei Xiaobao seemed to understand, but not really understood, so far he was quite happy. His only wish was that the large carriage would never stop moving, so that he could sit embracing a beautiful woman [orig. jade person], traveling to the ends of the earth, and then turn around, and travel to the other ends of the earth, that the road under the heavens would continue forever; or even if it ends, what's the harm of going anywhere on foot?

Every day they would travel until night fall, where they lodged for the night, and then the next morning they would continue their journey. His only fear was that Fang Yi would finally say that they had arrived. In the middle of this cozy surrounding, the Emperor's imperial order, the Forty-two-chapter Sutra, the Old Emperor on Mount Wutai, everything was pushed away to the back of his mind. In his daze, he did not know how many days had passed.

Toward the evening one day, the carriage and the horses finally arrived on the ocean's shore. Taking his hand along, Fang Yi walked to the seaside and softly whispered in his ear, "Good Didi [younger brother], what do you say you and I board a ship, roaming the four seas, passing the days just like deities?" While saying that, she held his hand and rested her head on his shoulder.

Her body was so soft that it felt like she did not have any strength. Wei Xiaobao stretched out his left arm around her waist, to guard against her falling down. He felt her silky hair brushing against his cheek, her waist was so soft and tender, shivering slightly. Although the thought of boarding a ship and sailing to the sea was a bit too overwhelming, plus he had a faint feeling that something was not right, but at this time and this place, how could he bear to say this one word 'no'?

A large ship was anchored by the seaside. Seeing Fang Yi's subordinates waving dark green cloth, the sailors on the ship lowered a small boat to meet them at the shore. First they took Wei Xiaobao and Fang Yi on board, and then successively brought the rest of the people on board. Seeing they were about to embark on a voyage, Yu Ba said that he was seasick and would not want to go to the sea no matter what. Wei Xiaobao did not force him, he gave him a hundred taels of silver. With a thousand gratitude and ten thousand thanks, Yu Ba returned to Shanxi.

As Wei Xiaobao entered the cabin, he noticed that it was luxuriously furnished; the floor was covered in thick carpet, there were tea, fruits and delicacies on the table, just like the parlor in the homes of princes, dukes, or high ranking officials. He mused, "Good Jiejie is treating me like this, inevitably there will be an intention to harm me."

Two servants on the ship offered steamed towel for the two of them to wipe their faces with, followed by the serving of two bowls of noodles. The noodles were covered with shredded chicken; it was very delicious, the taste was different from ordinary noodles. And then he felt the hull swayed, obviously they set sail and went out to sea.

As the boat left the shore, another world was before their eyes. Fang Yi accompanied him drinking wine and playing finger-guessing game, they never stopped talking and laughing until very late at night. She took care of him first and tucked him into bed before retreating to separate room to rest for the night. The next day, she came back to help him dress and combed his hair. Wei Xiaobao thought, "Until now she does not know that I am not a eunuch; she only knew that our being husband and wife is a fake. When should I tell her the truth?"

The boat sailed for several days. One particular day the two of them were leaning on the window, enjoying the sunset on the sea. They saw the reflection of the sun like tens of thousands golden snake slithering on the surface of the sea, it was indescribably weird and wonderful. Fang Yi sighed and said, "When I go to assassinate the Tatar Emperor that day, I was so sure that I would lose my life in the Palace. Who would have known that Laotianye still protected me, unexpectedly I met you and today we enjoy this good fortune together. Good Didi, I am not clear of your lot in life. When did you enter the Palace? How did you learn martial art?"

Wei Xiaobao laughed and said, "I was just going to tell you, but I was afraid you might jump in fright, or perhaps you are so happy that you pass out."

Fang Yi leaned closer to him; with a low voice she said, "If I like what I hear, that will be best. But even if I don't like what I hear, I only want you to tell me the truth, then ... then I won't care."

"Good Jiejie," Wei Xiaobao said, "I will be honest with you, I was born in Yangzhou, Mama is from a brothel."

Fang Yi was shocked; with a trembling voice she asked, "What is your mama doing in the brothel? Is she doing laundry, cook rice, or ... or sweep the floor and pour tea?”

Wei Xiaobao saw her countenance underwent great change, her eyes showed a frightened look, instantly his heart turned ice-cold, knowing that she extremely despised the ‘brothel’. If he said honestly that his own mother was a prostitute, perhaps for the rest of his life she would never have even half a part of respect and affection. Immediately he laughed aloud and said, “When my Mama entered the brothel, she was only six or seven years old, how could she did laundry or cook rice for the people?”

Fang Yi’s countenance softened somewhat; “She was only six or seven years old?” she asked.

Wei Xiaobao said whatever came into his mind, “After the Tatars entered the Pass, they killed not a few people in Yangzhou; do you know this?” While saying that, his mind was trying to find a way to raise his mother’s dignity somewhat.

“That’s right,” Fang Yi said.

“My (maternal) grandfather was a high ranking official of the Ming Dynasty,” Wei Xiaobao said, “He took office in Yangzhou. When the Tatars broke through Yangzhou, my grandfather died in the resistance against the enemy. That time my Mama was only a little girl, wandering destitute on the street. There was a heroic, rich brothel’s patron who took pity on her, so he took her to become his servant girl. Upon further inquiry, he had a deep respect toward grandfather, so he took my Mama as his foster daughter [orig. yi nu – righteous female/daughter] and brought her home. My Mama became a ‘thousand gold’ young lady, later she married my Papa, who was a gongzi [young master/son of nobility] of Yangzhou’s famous and rich family.”

Fang Yi was half-believing, half-doubting. “So that’s how it is,” she said, “You did indeed scare me that I jumped in fright, thinking that your Mama was destitute in the brothel, being female maid of the people, serving those people who knew no shame, an extremely … bad woman.”

Growing up in the brothel, Wei Xiaobao had never thought that his own Mama was a ‘bad woman who knew no shame’, hearing Fang Yi said such things, he could not help but was secretly angry. He said in his heart, “Do you think your Mu Palace women are so great? Damn it, in my opinion they are also people who knew no shame, extremely whatever.”

Originally he was thinking of telling her his real life story in a calm, undisturbed manner, and would not hide anything from her; but now he simply boasted unguardedly, telling her how extravagant was his family in Yangzhou, giving her an exaggerated account of everything. But when he told about the halls and the rooms of his residence, the setup of the furniture, inevitably he was talking about the layout of the Lovely Spring Courtyard.

But Fang Yi did not pay any attention to his story; she said, “Is this the thing you meant when you said that you wanted to tell me something that will make me happy that I might pass out?”

Wei Xiaobao felt as if she was splashing a bucket of cold water on his head. Also, noticing how indifferent she was toward his bragging, he could not restrain his excitement from dying out; he was disinclined to tell her that he was not an eunuch. “That was it,” he said casually, “Turns out you are not happy at all.”

Fang Yi said unenthusiastically, “I am happy.” It was clear that she did not mean it.

The two of them were silent for a moment. Suddenly a stretch of land appeared on the northeastern direction. This ship was heading exactly on that direction. Fang Yi said in amazement, “Uh, what kind of place is that?”

Less than two hours later, they were getting closer to the land, and saw the verdant trees on the shore, which stretched out in both direction as far as eyes could see, the beach was covered in snow white fine sands. Fang Yi said, “We have been sailing for a few days, our heads are muddled, what do you say we go up and look around?”

“Very good,” Wei Xiaobao happily said, “It looks like a big island, I wonder if there is some fun things on the island.”

Fang Yi summoned the helmsman to the cabin and asked him the name of the island, as well as its specialty. The helmsman replied, “In answer to Miss’ question, this island is a well-known immortal island of the Eastern Sea. I heard there are immortal fruits on the island, those who ate it will have long life and won’t grow old, it’s just that only blessed people will be able to obtain it. There is no harm in Miss and Wei Xianggong to go up and try your luck.”

Fang Yi nodded. When the helmsman had left the cabin, she softly said, “I don’t care about long life and won’t grow old. These last few days I am happier than being an immortal.”

[foxs]

Wei Xiaobao was ecstatic; he said, “You and I can live on the island for the rest of our lives. Immortal fruits and what not, it’s not a big deal, as long as you are willing for accompany me forever, I feel like an immortal.”

Fang Yi leaned closer to him and said in gentle voice, “Me too.”

The two of them rode a small boat to go ashore, and treaded on the fine sand of the beach. Their noses caught the whiff of fragrance of flowers floating from the forest. They felt they had indeed arrived at a fairyland. “I wonder if there are people living on this island?” Fang Yi said.

Wei Xiaobao laughed and said, “I don’t think there are people, but there is a fairy whose beauty is matchless, taking her little servant along, who has just arrived on the island.”

With a very sweet smile Fang Yi said, “Good Didi, you are my little servant, and I am your little maid.”

When Wei Xiaobao heard the word ‘maid’, Wei Xiaobao suddenly remembered Shuang’er. Turning his head around, he did not see her following to the island. These past few days he had given Shuang’er a cold treatment, in his heart he was quite remorseful, but thinking that if she tagged along, he would not be too comfortable to be affectionate toward Fang Yi; hence it was better that she did not come along.

Hand in hand the two of them entered the forest, the air was very thick with the fragrance of the flowers. Wei Xiaobao said, “This fragrance of the flowers is exceptionally thick, could the flowers be immortal flowers?” Taking a few steps forward, suddenly he heard rustling noise of the grass, followed by a yellow shadow flashed before his eyes, seven or eight yellow with black stripes vipers fled out. “Aiyo!” Wei Xiaobao cried out. Pulling Fang Yi’s hand, he turned around and ran. But after taking only one step, seven or eight snakes blocked their way, their bodies were blood red, their tongues flicking in and out, hissing noisily. The snakes’ heads were all triangular, an obvious sign that they all had acute poison.

Fang Yi stepped in front of Wei Xiaobao’s body, pulling her saber and brandishing it she called out, “Run away quickly, I’ll block the vipers!”

But how could Wei Xiaobao be willing to forgo yi qi like this, running for his life alone? Busily he drew his dagger and said, “We’ll go from this side!” Pulling Fang Yi along, he bolted off to the side. But after only two steps, he felt something cold on his neck, a snake dangled down from a tree and coiled itself around his neck, scaring him that his soul flew out to the sky, he cried out loudly.

Fang Yi reached out to pull the snake’s body. “No, you can’t do that!” Wei Xiaobao cried out. The snake turned its head around and bit the back of Fang Yi’s hand firmly and did not let her go. Wei Xiaobao brandished the dagger and chopped the snake’s head clean. By this time, a viper had wrapped itself on each one of their legs. Wei Xiaobao brandished his dagger to chop their heads, but he felt his left leg went numb, a viper had bitten him.

Fang Yi tossed away her single-blade saber and embraced him, crying, “We, husband and wife, will die in here today.” Relying on the sharpness of his dagger, Wei Xiaobao chopped one snake with every wave of the dagger, but more and more snakes came out of the forest. The two of them desperately trying to get out of the forest, their bodies had been bitten seven eight times each. Wei Xiaobao felt a dizzy spell, he was gradually losing his consciousness. Looking toward the ocean, he saw the little boat was sailing back to the big ship, it was already quite some distance away from the shore. Fang Yi called several times, but how could the sailors on the boat hear her?

Fang Yi rolled up Wei Xiaobao’s trouser, she bent down and sucked up the snake venom from his leg. Wei Xiaobao was startled, “No … don’t!” he said.

Suddenly they heard footsteps behind them, someone was saying, “What are you doing here? Aren’t you afraid to die?”

Wei Xiaobao turned his head around, and saw three middle-aged men. “Dashu [big uncle] help,” he hastily called out, “We are bitten by the snakes.”

One man took out a pill from his pocket, put it in his own mouth and chewed it for a moment, and then spread it on the snake bites on Wei Xiaobao’s body. Wei Xiaobao said, “Please … please help her first.” By now his own legs had already turned black, his entire body had lost its senses. Fang Yi received the medicine from the man and applied it on her own wounds. “Good Jiejie …” Wei Xiaobao said, his eyes blackened, ‘crash!’ with a loud cry he fell backward.

When he woke up, he felt his lips were parched and his tongue dry, there was a sharp pain on the pit of his stomach; he could not help but groaning loudly. He heard someone spoke, “Good, you’re awake!” Wei Xiaobao slowly opened his eyes, and saw someone with a bowl of medicine, which he held in front of Wei Xiaobao’s mouth. This medicine was exceptionally smelly, but without hesitation he drank it down. As it entered his mouth, it tasted strangely bitter. After he finished the medicine, he said, “Thank you Dashu, for saving my life. I … how is my Jiejie?”

“Fortunately we saved you in time,” the man replied, “If we arrived just a bit late, the two of you would have lost your lives. You are too daring, why did you come to this immortal island?”

Hearing Fang Yi was saved, Wei Xiaobao was greatly relieved, he did not stop expressing his gratitude. Only then did he realize that he was lying underneath a quilt, his entire clothes were gone, his legs were still numb. The man’s appearance was unsightly, his face was full of scars, but in Wei Xiaobao’s eyes, he looked like a Bodhisattva who saved his life. He let out a breath and said, “The sailors on the ship said that there are immortal fruits on this island, those who ate it will have long life and won’t grow old.”

“Hey,” the man laughed, “If there were indeed such immortal fruits, why didn’t they come to pick the fruits themselves?”

“Aiyo!” Wei Xiaobao exclaimed, “Those sailors harbor malicious intentions. I still have a companion on the ship, I am afraid ... I am afraid she might fall into those bad people's hands. Dashu, please think of a way to rescue her."

The ugly man said, "That ship has already left three days ago, how could I find it?"

Wei Xiaobao was puzzled; "Three days ago?" he asked in bewilderment.

The ugly man said, "You have been in coma for three whole days and nights, most likely you did not know it?"

Although Shuang'er's martial art skill was high, she was all alone on the boundless ocean, how could she escape the wicked men's evil scheme? Remembering her, Wei Xiaobao could not help but was very anxious. The ugly man comforted him, "Feeling anxious this moment is useless. You'd better take a good rest, the snakes on this island are not a small matter, you will need at least seven days of treatment before the venom can be eradicated." He asked Wei Xiaobao's name, and introduced himself as having a surname of Pan.

By the third day, Wei Xiaobao was able to get up and walk slowly by holding on to the wall. The ugly man surnamed Pan took him to see Fang Yi. Turned out she was being taken care of by another woman, but her jade countenance was wan and sallow, her spirit was weary. When the two of them met, they were both happy and grieved at the same time, and thus they embraced each other and cried together. Henceforth the two of them share the same room during the day. When talking about the fierceness of the vipers' venom, the hair on their bodies stood up.

By the sixth day, the man surnamed Pan said, "The physician of our island, Mr. Lu, has returned from his journey out to the sea, I have already invited him to examine Wei Xiongdi." Wei Xiaobao thanked him.

Not too long afterwards, a man in his forties walked in, he dressed as a scholar, his expression is friendly; he asked Wei Xiaobao how the snakes bit him. He said, "The residents of this island always have realgar snake medicine handy, when this medicine is applied on the vipers, the snakes will immediately run away, and will not dare to bite people."

"So that's how it is," Wei Xiaobao said, "No wonder Pan Dage and the others are not afraid."

Mr. Lu examined his wound, and took out six pills, he said, "You take three pills, and give the other three to your companion. Take one pill every day."

Wei Xiaobao thanked him profusely. He took out two hundred taels worth of banknotes. "A little bit of treatment fee," he said, "I ask Mister not to laugh."

Mr. Lu was startled; he said, "Why so much? Gongzi gives me two taels, and I am already grateful." Wei Xiaobao insisted on giving him the whole thing, Mr. Lu thanked him and accepted. He said with a laugh, "Gongzi is so generous, to refuse would be impolite. Perhaps Gongzi feels stifled staying here, what do you say tonight Gongzi and your female companion come to my humble home to have a cup of wine?" Wei Xiaobao was delighted and readily accepted the invitation.

That evening, Mr. Lu sent two sedan chairs to pick up Wei Xiaobao and Fang Yi. These bamboo sedan chairs were actually bamboo chairs with two bamboo poles attached on each side, carried by two men, one in the front and the other on the back. The residents of the island were simple and crude, they did not have real sedan chairs.

The two sedan chairs travelled along a mountain stream. The water of the creek gurgled, the vegetation was fresh and clean, they both felt completely relax. Only when they saw tall grass did Wei and Fang, two people, shuddered in apprehension, for fear that some vipers would come out of the grass. After traveling for seven, eight li, the sedan chairs arrived in front of a cluster of three bamboo buildings. The building's walls and roofs were made of coarse bamboo poles about the size of a bowl in diameter weaved together, it looked very firm and solid. Wei Xiaobao had never seen a bamboo construction like this in Jiangnan and Hebei [Translator's note: I am not sure about this. Jiangnan can also mean 'south of Yangtze', Hebei can also mean 'north of yellow river'.]

Mr. Lu went out to welcome them, and invited the two of them to enter. At the hall, a woman in her thirties came out to welcome the guests, she was Mr. Lu's wife. The woman pulled Fang Yi's hand; she appeared very friendly. Mr. Lu invited Wei Xiaobao to sit in his study room.

The bamboo bookshelf in the study room was full of books, the four walls were also full of hanging calligraphy and painting, apparently Mr. Lu was an elegant scholar. Mr. Lu said, "Zaixia is an uncouth resident of a barren island, extremely ill-informed and narrow-minded. Wei Gongzi came from a well-known scenic spot on the Central Plains, a younger generation of a noble family, your view must be broad, your appreciation must be exquisite. Please look at these several painting and calligraphy; in your opinion, will they be passable to enter your house?"

These several sentences were scholarly talk, Wei Xiaobao did not understand even half a sentence, but seeing he was pointing to the painting and calligraphy on the wall, he looked up and saw a scenery painting [orig. mountain and water], and another one with painting of red-crowned crane and a turtle. He laughed and said, "That old turtle looks very amusing."

Mr. Lu was slightly startled; he pointed to a scroll on the table and asked, "Wei Gongzi, what do you think of my Shigu script[1]?"

Wei Xiaobao saw the characters were curvy, just like the writing on a talisman. He nodded and said, "Good, very good!"

Mr. Lu pointed to another scroll of large brush-written characters; he said, "This painting is Qin Dynasty's stone engrave of Lang Ya [clean and white ivory] Platform, what does Wei Gongzi think about it?"

Wei Xiaobao thought that if he blindly agreed to everything, it would not be interesting, so he shook his head and said, "This calligraphy is not too good."

Mr. Lu felt a deep veneration as he said, "Would Wei Gongzi please give directions? Where is the faulty stroke and weak points of this calligraphy?"

"There are too many faulty strokes, there are too little superb strokes!" Wei Xiaobao said. He thought that since there are 'faulty stroke', then naturally there are 'superb stroke' as well.

It was the very first time that Mr. Lu heard the term 'superb stroke', he was taken aback and was at a loss momentarily.

"Brilliant, brilliant!" he said. Pointing to a grass script calligraphy on the western wall, he said, "This is wild grass script, what does Wei Gongzi think about it?"

Cocking his head, Wei Xiaobao looked at the painting for a moment, and then he shook his head and said, "These several characters are out of ink, you should rub some more ink stick. Um, this thread here is being dragged here and there, but you did not wipe it clean."

As soon as Mr. Lu heard this, his countenance changed greatly. Grass script pays particular attention to the application of dry and wet ink. When the brush is moist, the character is wet, when the brush is dried up, the character looks parched; dry and wet alternates, creating delicate shades of strokes. There is conspicuous wetness in the dry character, and contrasting dry stroke in the wet character, yin and yang complements each other, just like the red cloud obstructing the sky, the square makes a wonderful letter. As for the thread of strokes joined together, calligraphers call it 'transparent' lines; sometimes it joins several brush strokes together, sometimes it joins several letters together. Particular attention must be paid to both sides, the angles change irregularly, sometimes the brush floats, or turns abruptly to create all kinds of different look. By saying those words, Wei Xiaobao had revealed his background.

Mr. Lu pointed to another scroll of calligraphy and said, "This one is entirely oracle bone inscriptions, Xiongdi's knowledge is shallow, I don't even know a single character, would Wei Gongzi please give directions?"

Wei Xiaobao saw that all characters on the paper look like tadpoles, just like the characters engraved on the stone tablet in the Pu Ji Temple on Jinxiu Peak of Mount Wutai; his heart was moved, he said, "I know these several characters, it says 'Hong Jiaozhu of Shen Long Jiao will not be old for ten thousand years, he will enjoy the good fortune of the immortals forever, his magical power is extensive, his long-life is the same as the Heaven's'."

A delighted expression spread across Mr. Lu's face; he said, "Thank Heaven and thank the Earth, you indeed know these characters!"

Seeing his extreme delight, so much so that his voice was trembling, Wei Xiaobao's suspicion arose: "I only know several characters, why is he this happy? Could it be that he also belongs to Shen Long Jiao? Aiyo, not good! Snake ... snake ... spirit snake ... could it be that this is the Divine Dragon Island?" He blurted out, "Where is Fat Toutuo?"

Mr. Lu was shocked; he withdrew several steps and with a trembling voice said, "You ... you know it?"

Wei Xiaobao nodded. Actually, he did not know anything. Mr. Lu's expression became serious as he said, "Since you know it, then it's very good." Walking toward the desk, he ground some ink and said, "Please translate these tadpole scripts one by one. Which one is 'Hong' character, which one is 'Jiao' character?" Lifting the brush, he beckoned him to come over.

Asking Wei Xiaobao to take up a pen to write was more cruel than asking him to surrender his life. Wei Xiaobao groaned inwardly, but seeing Mr. Lu's unsightly expression, he did not dare to disobey. Bracing himself, he walked over to the desk and sat down. He took the pen and held it inside his fist. The way he hold the pen was thirty percent similar to holding chopsticks when he eat, but the way he clench his fist was also similar to the way people holding a knife to butcher a pig, or holding a hammer to pound the nail; how could there be such a way to hold the pen in the world?

Mr. Lu's angry look was growing, he struggled hard to control it. Slowly he said, "Write down your name first!"

Wei Xiaobao suddenly stood up and tossed the pen onto the floor, the ink splattered everywhere, he said in a loud voice, "Laozi does not know dog's fart, I can't write 'fart' character. All those 'Hong Jiaozhu's long-life is the same as the Heaven's', laozi was simply boasting unguardedly to swindle that bad toutuo. If you want laozi to write, wait for my next reincarnation. You want to kill me or chop me, if laozi even frown, just consider me not a real man."

Mr. Lu coldly said, "You don't know any character?"

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[1] Lit. stone drum, early form of Chinese characters inscribed in stone, from spring and autumn period.