The Deer and The Cauldron - Unabridged Thread

[foxs]

Wei Xiaobao slapped the table and shouted, “This bandit is being rude to the General, seize him and off with his head!” The crowd of officers complied in chorus.

Yuan Yifang was so scared that his face turned ash-grey, his knees turned soft, he kneeled down on the ground and said, “Xiao … Xiaoren does not dare, Great General … Great General please spare my life.”

Wei Xiaobao was very happy; he thought, “This fellow is calling me Great General[1].” He shouted, “I am going to ask you questions, answer everything truthfully, if there is the slightest bit of covering the truth, your head will be chopped down.”

“Yes, yes!” Yuan Yifang repeatedly said.

Wei Xiaobao ordered his men to get foot fetters and handcuffs, and had him shackled. Then he ordered to have the money returned to those who lost and told them to withdraw. Only Zhang Kangnian, Zhao Qixian, two Imperial Bodyguards, and the Valiant Cavalry Can Ling [Regimental Commander] Fu Chun, remained in the tent. Zhang Kangnian commenced the interrogation immediately. He asked one sentence, Yuan Yifang answered one sentence; as expected, he did not conceal anything.

Turned out the Zhangmen [Sect Leader] of Wangwu Pai was Situ Bolei, a deputy general during the Ming Dynasty, an affiliate and subordinate of the Shanhai Pass Commander Wu Sangui, who, at that time, was fighting against Manchurian’s invasion. He was a brave and very able fighter, and had rendered quite a bit of meritorious deeds. Afterwards Li Zicheng broke into Beijing and Wu Sangui led the Qing army entering the Pass, Situ Bolei led his troops to fight Li Zicheng, killed the enemy using extreme force of will, attacked them back into Beijing. At that time he only knew that the Qing troops entered the Pass in order to avenge Emperor Chongzhen; to his surprise, however, the Qing troops seized that opportunity to occupy the Han people’s rivers and mountains, and Wu Sangui became the great traitor to China.

In his rage, Situ Bolei immediately relinquished his official position and went to Wangwu Mountain to live in seclusion. A considerable number of his former subordinates were not willing to surrender to the Manchurian Qing, they came to Wangwu Mountain to live with him. Situ Bolei’s martial art skill was actually very high, having no other engagement, he taught his former subordinates martial art, and after a long time, they automatically became the Wangwu Pai. They were master and disciples first before becoming a sect or a martial art school, so it was not quite the same as other schools. Mentioning Situ Bolei’s name, Zhang Kangnian and the others had also heard about him.

Yuan Yifang said that the young man who led them was Situ Bolei’s son, Situ He; the rest of their group was his martial brothers, and several of his seniors, equivalent to his martial uncles. The young girl was called Zeng Rou; her father was Situ Bolei’s subordinate, who passed away several years earlier. Toward the end of his life, he ordered his daughter to do obeisance and enter his former superior’s school.

Recently they obtained information that Wu Sangui’s son, Wu Yingxiong had come to Beijing. Situ Zhangmen then sent them to meet with him. Passing this place, they saw the Qing troops’ camp. Situ He was young and like to meddle, sneaking into the camp, they saw everybody was gambling, so he had the urge to rob them. His real intention was not for the money, he wanted to kill some Manchu soldiers to vent his anger.

“What do you want to see Wu Sangui’s son for?” Wei Xiaobao asked.

“Shifu’s order,” Yuan Yifang replied, “Is for us to think of a way to kidnap him and bring him back to Wangwu Mountain, thereupon threatening Wu Sangui, coercing him … coercing him …”

“What?” Wei Xiaobao asked, “Coercing him to revolt?”

“It was what Shifu had said,” Yuan Yifang said, “It has nothing to do with Xiaoren. Xiaoren is loyal to the Great Qing, I will never dare to revolt. Today Xiaoren has made a clean break [orig. one knife two segments] with Wangwu Pai, it was exactly because I am unwilling to be attached to the rebels, I want to throw away the dark and invest in the light, to be in the front of the troops against the insurrection.”

Wei Xiaobao kicked him and said with a laugh, “Damn it, you are a big loyalist.”

Yuan Yifang did not dodge at all, he received the kick and said, “Yes, yes! I rely entirely on Great General’s training. Hereafter Xiaoren will be Great General’s servant, Great General’s slave; I will be loyal and devoted, will go through water and tread on fire, under no circumstances will I decline to obey your command.”

Wei Xiaobao thought that this time the opponent had killed three Imperial Bodyguards, yet I have let Situ He, Zeng Rou and the others go, I am afraid Zhang Kangnian and the other Imperial Bodyguards would not accept, or at least blame Laozi’s luck in throwing the dice was too disappointing. Seeing the case in front of him, he thought that he must give everybody some benefit, so that he could save his own face as the banker that day. After pondering for half a day, he came up with an idea. Stretching out his hand, he heavily slapped the table and shouted, “What a brazen traitor, clearly you are in collusion with Wu Sangui, planning a rebellion, yet you still say you wanted to kidnap his son. How much have you received from Wu Sangui that you are willing to cover up the truth for him? Damn it, son of a b1tch, get someone here, beat this guy severely for me!”

From outside the tent entered seven or eight sergeants, who spread Yuan Yifang on the ground and beat him with the army stick until his flesh was bruised and lacerated.

“Are you going to confess now?” Wei Xiaobao asked, “You said you are going to kidnap Wu Sangui’s son, why did you come to our army camp and kill our Imperial Bodyguards? The Imperial Bodyguard and the Valiant Cavalry are the Emperor’s most trusted subordinates; by offending the Imperial Bodyguard and the Valiant Cavalry, you are not giving the Emperor any face.” Hearing this, Zhang Kangnian, Fu Chun and the others were very pleased, they spoke out together to threaten him.

Wei Xiaobao said, “This fellow utters graceful words, flowery speech, he is fabricating lies to deceive us. This kind of rebellious traitor, how can he tell the truth unless he is beaten? Beat him again!”

The crowd of sergeants shouted and randomly struck their army sticks down. Yuan Yifang screamed, “Don’t hit, don’t hit! Xiaoren is willing confess!”

Wei Xiaobao asked, “Altogether, how many of you live on Mount Wangwu?”

“Altogether we have more than 400 people,” Yuan Yifang replied.

“Including your families?” Wei Xiaobao asked.

“Approximately two thousand people,” Yuan Yifang replied.

Wei Xiaobao slapped the table and cursed, “F*ck your granny! How can there be so little? Beat him again!”

“Don’t hit, don’t hit!” Yuan Yifang screamed, “There are more than four thousand … five thousand people.”

Wei Xiaobao cursed again, “F*ck your granny’s eighteen-generation ancestors, why don’t you just speak straightforward; nine thousand is nine thousand, why do you have to divide it into four thousand and five thousand?”

“Yes, yes!” Yuan Yifang said, “There are more than nine thousand.”

“You are a rebellious traitor,” Wei Xiaobao said, “How can you tell the truth? If you say nine thousand, there must be at least nineteen thousand of you.” ‘Bang!’ he slapped the table again and shouted, “The rebels gathering on Mount Wangwu, how many are there?”

Listening to his tone, Yuan Yifang realized that the higher the number he mentioned, the happier the young general was; thereupon he said, “I heard … I heard there are thirty thousand people altogether.”

“That’s right,” Wei Xiaobao happily said, “That’s more like it.” Turning toward the Regimental Commander Fu Chun he said, “This miserable wretch will not confess unless he is beaten.”

“Exactly,” Fu Chun replied, “But he must be beaten ferociously.”

“No need to hit,” Yuan Yifang shouted, “Whatever Great General ask, Xiaoren will confess.” He had already decided that he would simply follow this young general’s tone of speech so that his skin and flesh would not suffer.

Wei Xiaobao said, “With more than thirty thousand of you, each one is trained in martial art, is that right? The young miss just now, she is only fourteen or fifteen, but she is trained in martial art. You are all Wu Sangui’s former subordinates, but some of you are young, you must be the offspring of his former high-ranking military officer, are you not?”

“Yes, yes!” Yuan Yifang said, “Everybody knows … knows martial art, all of us are Wu Sangui’s former subordinates.”

Wei Xiaobao said, “Your leader Situ Bolei, he was Wu Sangui’s favorite general, when he fought a battle, he was very formidable, was he not? He said he wanted to completely wipe us, the Manchu people, out?”

“That was his talk of treason and heresy,” Yuan Yifang said, “It was … it was extremely wrong of him.”

Wei Xiaobao said, “He sent you to Beijing to see Wu Sangui’s son, to discuss how you are going to revolt. Why didn’t you go to Yunnan and discuss it with Wu Sangui face to face?”

Yuan Yifang said, “This … this … perhaps … perhaps there is another reason.” In reality, they only wanted to kidnap Wu Yingxiong, so it was really not easy to answer Wei Xiaobao’s question.

“Scoundrel!” Wei Xiaobao angrily said, “What other reason? Your Situ Bolei has already gone to Yunnan and has reached an agreement with Wu Sangui, hasn’t he?”

“Probably … probably he has,” Yuan Yifang replied.

Wei Xiaobao cursed, “What do you mean probably or probably not? Damn it, if yes say yes, if no say no.”

“Yes … yes,” Yuan Yifang said, “He has.”

Zhang Kangnian, Zhao Qixian and Fu Chun, three people heard how Wei Xiaobao was guiding the confession, gradually pushing the blame of major crime of scheming a rebellion to Ping Xi Wang Wu Sangui’s head. They could not help but look at each other in blank dismay, while worrying inwardly, not knowing Wei Xiaobao’s real intention.

Wei Xiaobao asked further, “Situ Bolei was Wu Sangui’s favorite general, he raised these more than thirty thousand elite troops, why didn’t he set up his garrison in Yunnan? Your granny, where in the world is Wangwu Mountain?” He thought, “If Wangwu Mountain is in Yunnan, my question is a wrong question.” Fortunately Yuan Yifang replied, “It’s in Jiyuan County, Henan province.” But Wei Xiaobao did not have the slightest idea what kind of place Jiyuan County, Henan province was. He asked, “That’s close to Beijing, is it?”

“It’s not too far,” Yuan Yifang replied.

“F*ck your granny,” Wei Xiaobao cursed, “Close to Beijing is close to Beijing, what do you mean not too far?”

“Yes, yes,” Yuan Yifang said, “It’s very close, it’s very close.”

“Alright,” Wei Xiaobao said, “So it is very close to Beijing! You, rebellious thieves indeed have a malicious intention, on a mountain very close to Beijing you dare to raise elite troops. When Wu Sangui in Yunnan raises a rebellion, you will immediately go down the mountain to attack straight to Beijing, and will have each and every one of the Imperial Bodyguards and Valiant Cavalry killed like chopping melon or slicing vegetables, you will make a killing until the blood flow like a river, the corpses pile up like a mountain. You will attack like a billowing sandstorm and leave us to piss in our pants in terror, right?”

Yuan Yifang kowtowed and said, “This is Wu Sangui and Situ Bolei, two rebellious thieves’ conspiracy on treason and heresy, it has nothing … nothing to do with Xiaoren.”

Wei Xiaobao showed a faint smile; he mused, “This fellow is very clever.” He said, “In your Wangwu Pai, how many people have worked as military officers under Wu Sangui? I want you to give me names, one by one.”

“There are too many of them,” Yuan Yifang said. Immediately he started mentioning names, but this time he did not fabricate the names.

“Very good!” Wei Xiaobao said, “Write down these people’s names, I also want the names of those who were previously holding official positions under Wu Sangui.”

Yuan Yifang said, “Some … some names Xiaoren is not too clear.”

“You are not clear?” Wei Xiaobao asked, “Drag him down and beat him thirty more times. I am sure he will be clear.”

Yuan Yifang busily said, “No … don’t hit, Xiaoren will … will write down everything.” A sergeant brought pen and paper, Yuan Yifang wrote a list of names.

Seeing he had not finished after writing for half a day, Wei Xiaobao was getting impatient; he turned to Zhang Kangnian and said, “Get Mr. Secretary to record his oral confession.” He shouted to Yuan Yifang, “I want you to repeat the oral confession you gave just now, if you are being unclear for even half a sentence, your head will roll. Take him away.” Two officers took him away.

Wei Xiaobao chuckled and said to his three companions, “Laoxiong, this time we are really lucky, to be able to uncover this gargantuan rebellion conspiracy; all four of us will definitely enjoy big promotion.”

Zhang Kangnian and the others, three people, were surprised and happy at the same time. Zhao Qixian said, “This is Commander’s clear eye and brave decision, what merit do subordinates have?”

“Everybody has a share in seeing this matter,” Wei Xiaobao said, “Everyone has meritorious service.”

Zhang Kangnian said, “About Ping Xi Wang staging a rebellion, I wonder if we have enough evidence?”

Wei Xiaobao said, “This bunch of rebellious thieves of Mount Wangwu is planning to revolt, isn’t that the truth? They are going to Beijing to see Wu Sangui’s son, what good thing can possibly come out of that meeting?”

Zhang Kangnian said, “This man surnamed Yuan said that they wanted to kidnap Ping Xi Wang’s Heir Apparent, to compel Ping Xi Wang into revolting, I am afraid Ping Xi Wang did not necessarily have prior contact with them.”

Wei Xiaobao said, “Zhang Dage has had some dealings with Ping Xi Wang Mansion’s people, therefore, you know quite a bit of inside information, don’t you? If their rebellion succeeded, Ping Xi Wang will become the Emperor, hey, hey.”

Hearing the ill-intention in the tone of his voice, Zhang Kangnian was shocked; he hastily said, “I don’t know even one of the Ping Xi Wang Mansion’s people. Com … Commander is … is right, that servant Wu Sangui is … is planning treason and heresy, we must … must immediately report this to His Majesty.”

Wei Xiaobao said, “Would the three gentlemen discuss it with Mr. Secretary on how we are going to present this memorial to the throne.”

After Zhang Kangnian, three people and the armed force secretary finished writing the memorial to the throne, they read it out for Wei Xiaobao. The content was just like Yuan Yifang’s oral confession, with the list of names of Wu Sangui’s former subordinates on Wangwu Mountain attached to the letter. The memorial was replenished with sauce and spice, recounting how Wei Xiaobao had seen the rebellious traitors during the day, and pretended to be unprepared when they set up camp in the night, to lure the bandits to attack. The rebellious traitors were exceptionally fierce; Wei Xiaobao led the troops to fight bravely, he provided the leadership and captured the chief of the traitors, whose name was Yuan Yifang, alive, and learned about the rebellion plan. The Imperial Bodyguard Getong and two others gallantly died for their country, asking the Emperor to bestow grace by generously rewarding comfort and aid to the three persons’ bereaved families.

---

[1] A little bit of explanation here: so far, the people in blue had always called him ‘Xiao Jiangjun’ – Little/young general, now Yuan Yifang was calling him ‘Da Jiangjun’ – Big/great general.

[foxs]

After listening to this, Wei Xiaobao said, “Please also add several sentences on the meritorious service of the Regimental Commander Fu and Zhang and Zhao, two captains of the Imperial Bodyguards.” Fu Chun and the others, three people, were greatly delighted and immediately expressed their gratitude.

Wei Xiaobao added, “Also, add several sentences about we captured nineteen rebellious thieves, but no matter what, those rebellious traitors were unwilling to reveal the rebellion plan, therefore, according to His Majesty’s prior instruction, I intentionally release eighteen rebellious traitors, so that we can investigate clearly the entire rebellion plan.”

The three people asked together, “So releasing the eighteen rebellious traitors was part of His Majesty’s plan?”

“Naturally,” Wei Xiaobao replied, “I am so young, how can I be that smart? If not for His Majesty's foresight, how can I uncover this major rebellion plan?"

Previously, Kangxi had ordered Wei Xiaobao to release Wu Lishen, Ao Biao, Liu Yizhou, three people, in order to find the fact about the rebels entering the Palace. Zhang Kangnian and the others thought that the Emperor had already known that Wangwu Pai people would come to attack. In that case, the framing of Wu Sangui was also part of the Emperor's plan. Seeing that for no rhyme or reason great riches and honor was being delivered into their hands, they were all overjoyed and did not stop expressing their thousand thanks and ten thousands gratitude.

According to Manchurian Qing custom, when a general went into battle, he could not return without an imperial edict. Although Wei Xiaobao was only about twenty li from Beijing, he could not personally return to Beijing to submit the memorial to the throne. Thereupon he sent two Company Commanders and ten Imperial Bodyguards to lead one company [orig. 'niru'] of three hundred ordinary soldiers that very same night, with Yuan Yifang in custody, to present the memorial to the throne to Kangxi.

[Author's note: in the Eight Banners Army, three hundred men formed one 'niru'. The idea behind 'niru' was 'big arrow', the leader held a big arrow as the symbol of his authority. Five 'niru' formed one 'jalan', five 'jalan' formed one 'gusa'.]

Wei Xiaobao was very proud of himself; he thought, "This time I am giving Wu Sangui enough trouble. Mu Palace is having a competition against us, Tian Di hui, to see who will topple Wu Sangui first. Today Laozi has rendered great service to both Shifu. Shifu Chen of Tian Di Hui will be happy, Emperor Shifu will also be happy."

The next day he led his troops to continue their journey slowly southwards. By noon, two Imperial Bodyguards from Beijing, riding fast horses, caught up with them. They said, "His Majesty has a secret imperial edict."

Wei Xiaobao was greatly delighted, immediately he gathered all the Imperial Bodyguards and the Valiant Cavalry officers in his tent to receive the imperial decree. The Imperial Bodyguard bearing the imperial decree stood in the middle and read in loud and clear voice: "The Deputy Commander of Valiant Cavalry of Plain Yellow Banner, who simultaneously hold the Deputy Chief of the Imperial Bodyguards position, Wei Xiaobao, listen to this: Zhen told you to go to Shaolin Temple on a mission, who told you to meddle in other people's business along the way? You have listened to lowly characters speaking nonsense, bringing a false charge against a minister who has given outstanding service, foolishly pursuing this kind of business; how could you not bitterly disappoint your lord? Henceforth you are forbidden to mention that kind of rubbish talk, if even a word or a sentence leak out, all of you will return to Beijing to see Zhen with your heads hanging by your sides. By the Emperor himself."

As soon as Wei Xiaobao heard it, he was so scared that his back was wet with cold sweat. He had no choice but to kowtow and thank the Emperor's favor. The faces of everybody else in the tent went pale, they were very ashamed. Fu Chun, Zhang Kangnian and the others did not dare to talk too much, they thought that this little child was fooling around deliberately, His Majesty did not blame him for the crime, it could be considered that the Emperor treated him very well. Realizing that right now Wei Xiaobao's mood must be very bad, they did not want to look for a nail to bump, thereupon they took their leave and walked out the tent.

The Imperial Bodyguard bearing the imperial decree walked toward Wei Xiaobao and said in a low voice, "His Majesty's order: you must be very careful in everything."

"Yes," Wei Xiaobao replied, "His Majesty's grace, servant Wei Xiaobao is extremely grateful." Taking out four hundred taels of silver, he gave the money to the two Imperial Bodyguards.

After the two Imperial Bodyguards left, Wei Xiaobao was puzzled, "Could it be that the Emperor knows that I am slandering Wu Sangui? Or after he arrived in Beijing that servant Yuan Yifang retracted his statement and reported that he had confessed under torture? The Emperor seems to be very fond of Wu Sangui, toppling him is actually not going to be easy."

That evening, the Imperial Bodyguards and the Valiant Cavalry soldiers who were sent to escort Yuan Yifang caught up with them. After Wei Xiaobao bumped into this big nail, everybody did not have any interest to gamble anymore. Without speaking too much, one day the group arrived at the Shaolin Temple on Mount Song.

Having received the report of the arrival of the imperial decree, the Abbot led a group of monks going down the mountain to welcome the party, and then they took Wei Xiaobao and his entourage into the Temple.

Wei Xiaobao took out the imperial decree, opened the sealed envelope, and handed it over to Zhang Kangnian to be read. He heard quite a bit of lengthy and flowery sentences, something like 'The Masters[1] have profound understanding of mysterious principles of Buddhism, have the foreknowledge of wonderful reason, able to establish auspicious scheme, supporting the Emperor on both sides', or 'In the Palace of Nirvana hang the sun and the moon in their splendor, changing the color of the mist and cloud in the garden of Buddha', or 'The cloud circles peaks of Mount Song, the luan[2] return to Shaoshi[3], the grass bend down of the immortal dew, peaceful forest under Buddha's sun, the manifest of Buddhist people, the clear wisdom of our generation'. Following those sentences, the Head Monk of Shaolin Temple, Abbot Hui Cong was bestowed the title of 'The Zen Master [orig. chan shi] Protector of the Country, Blessing to the Sages', also, the eighteen Shaolin monks who had rendered great service on Mount Wutai were duly rewarded. Finally Zhang Kangnian read, "Hereby I am sending the Deputy Commander of Valiant Cavalry of Plain Yellow Banner, who simultaneously hold the Deputy Chief of the Imperial Bodyguards position, the wearer of Yellow Magua bestowed personally by the Emperor, Wei Xiaobao, to act on Zhen's behalf, to become a Buddhist monk in Shaolin Temple, granted by the Emperor to spend time to learn Buddhist law, namely, to take the tonsure. By the Emperor himself."

Listening to the bookish part in the front, Wei Xiaobao had no idea where the Emperor was driving at, but toward the end, he actually understood; he could not restrain his countenance from changing greatly. Kangxi wanted him to go to Mount Wutai and be a Buddhist monk there, and he had agreed. But never in his wildest dream would he expect that he was being sent to Shaolin Temple to have his head shaved here. He had the imperial decree continuously in his possession, but before arriving at the destination, how could he dare to open it? Besides, even if he took a peek, he would not know what was written on it anyway.

Hui Cong Chanshi[4] led the monks to thank the Emperor's favor. The officers took out the gift and distribute it. Wei Xiaobao stood on the side, watching. His heart was in chaos.

Hui Cong Chanshi said, "Wei Daren is going to be a monk in place of His Majesty, this is our Temple's rare honor." He took out a razor on the spot, and said, "Wei Daren is His Majesty's proxy, this is not a small matter, even Lao Na [lit. old cassock] does not dare to be your Shifu. Let Lao Na's late master receive you as his disciple, you are Lao Na's Shidi [younger martial brother], your Buddhist name will be Hui Ming. In all Shaolin Temple, other than you and Lao Na, two people, nobody else has this 'Hui' generation-character in his name."

Facing this situation, Wei Xiaobao had no choice but kneeling down with tears in his eyes to have his head shaved. Using the razor, Hui Cong Chanshi shaved his head three times first, and then the tonsure monk continued shaving his sparse hair, whatever was left of his burnt pigtail, until nothing was left. With authority Hui Cong Chanshi said, "Do not consider Shaolin's unadorned wall as an obstruction. Do not consider becoming a monk on the Emperor's behalf as grandeur. The glory and splendor of the dust was unlucky ['Hui'] in the past, but now it is bright ['Ming']. No coming, no going, no decrease, no increase!" Taking out the document conferred by the Emperor, he filled in the name 'Hui Ming' onto the document and had Wei Xiaobao kneeled down to worship the Tathagata[5]. The crowd of monks chorused in calling the name of Buddha.

Wei Xiaobao cursed in his heart, "You, bald-headed thief, do not have eighteen generations ancestors who accumulate merits, but come here and shave Laozi's head. You recite Amitabha Buddha, Laozi recite hot piece Mama in my heart." Suddenly he was overwhelmed with grief and bawled. The officers filling the hall were startled and stared at him. The monks continued their recitation; nobody paid him any attention.

After crying for a while, Wei Xiaobao had no choice but to stop. Hui Cong Chanshi said, "Shidi, among the monks in our Temple, currently we have eight characters of seniority, namely 'Da Jiao Guan Hui, Cheng Jing Hua Yan'. Our master Guan Zheng Chanshi has passed away twenty-eight years ago, all the Cheng generation monks in our Temple are your Shizhi [martial nephew]."

Immediately the monks, in the order of seniority, stepped forward to pay their respect; among them were Cheng Xin, Cheng Guang, Cheng Tong, and the others, who had had friendship with him before. The Cheng generation old monks with their white, silvery beards were all calling him as Shishu [martial (younger) uncle]. Among the Jing generation monks, there were quite a few of old men, yet they were all calling him Shishuzu [martial granduncle]. The most interesting thing was the Hua generation monks; some of them were thirty, forty years old, but they paid their respect to him by calling him Tai Shishuzu [martial great-granduncle]. Wei Xiaobao was amused and could not help but bursting into loud laughter. Seeing the tears on his face had not been wiped, yet he was laughing happily, everybody smiled.

Turned out the reason Kangxi dispatched the Imperial Bodyguards and his personal troops the Valiant Cavalry to Shaolin Temple was no more than escorting Wei Xiaobao to take the tonsure and become a Buddhist monk; however, as the Emperor's proxy, how could he be compared to ordinary person? If not for the fanfare, how could the Shaolin monks see the grandeur of this matter?

The Regimental Commander Fu Chun of the Valiant Cavalry, the Imperial Bodyguards Zhao Qixian, Zhang Kangnian, and the others bade their farewell to Wei Xiaobao. Wei Xiaobao took out three hundred taels of silver and asked Zhang Kangnian to rent a private house at the foot of the mountain where Shuang'er could stay. Shaolin Temple has never accepted female benefactors inside their temple. Although Shuang'er was wearing a man's clothing, the eighteen Luohan of Damo Hall had all known her as Wei Xiaobao's servant girl; therefore, she was waiting at the foot of the mountain. She only knew that Wei Xiaobao was going to pass on the imperial decree, and hand over the rewards to the monks; afterwards, Wei Xiaobao would come down the mountain and return to Beijing. Who would have thought that he was supposed to be a monk in the Temple?

Not only Wei Xiaobao was the Emperor's proxy, he had the 'Hui' character in his name, denoting him a senior monk; therefore, everybody in the Temple revered him. The Abbot reserved a large meditation room for him. Abbot Hui Cong said, "Shidi, you are free to do anything in the Temple, you may do morning and night chores as you wish. Other than abstaining against taking life, stealing, being lascivious, lying, drinking wine, five major Buddhist monastic disciplines, you can choose whether to observe or not to observe the minor discipline." And then he explained in details what those five major Buddhist monastic disciplines mean.

Wei Xiaobao thought, "Lying is included in these five major Buddhist monastic disciplines, to Laozi, I don't want to guard against whatever I say." He asked, "Is gambling also to be abstained?"

Abbot Hui Cong was taken aback. "What gambling?" he asked.

"Gambling for money?" Wei Xiaobao said.

Hui Cong smiled and said, "Within the five major Buddhist monastic disciplines, gambling is not mentioned. Other people may want to abstain against it, but Shidi may do as you wish."

Wei Xiaobao thought, "Damn it, if I am the only one who does not abstain against it, what's the use? Could I be betting against myself?"

After living in the Temple for several days, he was already bored to death; he pondered, "Xiao Xuanzi wanted me to serve the Old Emperor, but he sent me to Shaolin Temple to be a monk. I wonder when is he going to let me go to Mount Wutai?"

One particular day he wandered aimlessly to the outside of the Luohan Hall. He saw Cheng Tong was overseeing six disciples in martial art training. As soon as those monks saw his arrival, they bowed together to salute. Wei Xiaobao waved his hand and said, "Don't be too polite, you may continue your training."

He saw the six 'Jing' generation monks boxing technique was precise and rigorous, their movements were very nimble, the changes in their stances were very dynamic; compared to this 'martial granduncle' of theirs, they were actually much more superior. He heard Cheng Tong giving them directions, how firm and how fast should this punch be, how to be powerful but flexible, how to position this kick, how not to kick too high, and so on. Wei Xiaobao did not understand anything, so he was just watching without any interest. After a while he turned around and walked away, thinking, "I always hear people say that Shaolin Temple's martial art skill is number one under the heavens. Now that I am a monk in the Temple, won't it be a pity if I don't learn the skill?" Suddenly it dawned on him, "Aiyo! I got it! The dog fart Shaolin martial art that the old turtle Hai Dafu taught me was fake, it is totally useless. Xiao Xuanzi is sending me to Shaolin Temple to be a monk here, he wants me to learn the real skill of Shaolin Pai before I can protect the Old Emperor. But my Shifu died twenty eight years ago, who will teach me martial art?"

After pondering for half a day, he finally understood one thing: "Old Monk Abbot makes me his Shidi, it's precisely so that I don't have any Shifu; this old bald thief is very crafty. Hmm, that's right, he knew I am the Emperor's trusted aide, who is a high-ranking Manchu official; there is no way he would be willing to pass on excellent martial art skill to this little Tatar. Humph, you don't want to teach me, do you think I cannot learn by looking?"

In Wulin world, when people were teaching martial art, it was a big taboo for any school or sect to have other people watching on the side. However, this Hui Ming Chanshi was their own Temple's 'Senior Monk of Older Generation'. When their Sect's disciples and grand-disciples were practicing martial art and he wanted to watch on the side, nobody could raise any objection.

Wei Xiaobao looked to the east and gazed to the west in all courtyards and halls around the Temple. Whenever there were people training martial art, he would stand and watch for a while. Unfortunately, this 'senior monk's' foundation was indeed too superficial. What Hai Dafu taught him was not a real martial art, while what Chen Jinnan taught him, the internal energy cultivation technique, he only practiced for several days. Shaolin Pai's martial art was wide-ranging and profound, by casually watching like this, how could he reap any benefit? Much less he did not have any patience to watch for an extended period of time.

Therefore, after wandering around Shaolin Temple for more than a month, he did not learn even one bit of martial art skill. However, he had an easy-going personality, he loved to mingle around and make friends. Since in term of seniority his position in the Temple was second only to the Abbot, and he was willing to make friends with other people, all monks were very warm toward him.

One day, the spring breeze was gentle and pleasant, Wei Xiaobao felt his entire body was comfortably warm. Living in a monastery with monks as his only companions was really not the most fun thing to do, thereupon he went out the Temple's gate and strolled down the mountain. He thought that he had not seen Shuang'er for quite a while, he wanted to know how this girl was doing, so he wanted to see her. Moreover, day in and day out he ate vegetarian dishes in the Temple, he had already cursed the green vegetables and tofu's ancestor several thousand, several tens of thousand times. He wanted Shuang'er to buy some chicken, fish and meat, and let the great monk eat to his heart's desire.

Walking near the Welcoming Guest Pavilion [Ying Ke Ting] outside the Temple, he suddenly heard the sound of people quarreling; he was delighted, "Wonderful, wonderful! A fight." Quickening his steps, he heard the voices of men, intersperse with the sharp and clear voice of several women.

---

[1] Orig. 'fashi' - one who has mastered the Buddhist sutras.

[2] Mythical bird, related to Phoenix.

[3] Shaoshi Peak was the location of Shaolin Temple.

[4] I remember in White Hair Demoness Faerie Queene translated Chanshi as Dhyana Master, but I think I am going to keep it in its original form.

[5] From the dictionary: Buddha's name for himself, having many layers of meaning - Sanskrit: thus gone, having been Brahman, gone to the absolute etc.

[foxs]

When he came near, he saw two young women in the Pavilion squabbling with four of their Temple's monks. When the four monks saw Wei Xiaobao, they said together, "Shishuzu is here, let's have the Senior be the judge over this matter." Welcoming him to the Pavilion, they put their palms together and bowed. These four monks were of the 'Jing' generation. Wei Xiaobao knew that they were in charge of receiving guests and benefactors outside the Temple. Usually they were very well-disposed and very affable, yet somehow they were engaged in a squabble with these two young women. Looking at the two women, one was approximately twenty years old, wearing blue garment, the other was younger, perhaps around sixteen or seventeen years old, wearing light green garment.

As soon as Wei Xiaobao looked at this young woman, he could not stop his heart from jumping, he felt as if the pit of his stomach was beaten by an invisible iron hammer, in an instant his lips were parched, his tongue dried, he was dumbstruck and could only thought, "I am dead, I must be dead! Where did this beautiful woman come from? If this beautiful woman is given to me as my wife, even if the young emperor wanted to switch places with me, I don't want it. Dead or alive, the heaven above the earth below, forest of spears or rain of arrows, mountain of blade or a deep fryer, no matter what Wei Xiaobao must take this miss as a wife."

Seeing how these four monks were calling the young monk 'martial granduncle', and were treating him with great respect, the two women were very surprised. And then they noticed his eyes were staring blankly at the girl in green clothes. Even a common man ought not to be so impolite, much less this was someone who had left home to become a monk. The girl in green blushed, she turned her head away. An angry look started to appear on the woman in blue's face.

Wei Xiaobao was oblivious; he mused, "Why did she turn her head away? When she is blushing slightly like that, even if a hundred girls of Lovely Spring Courtyard stand together, they do not look as good as one strand of her eyebrow. If I have to give her ten thousand taels each time she laugh, it is still worth it." He also thought, "Miss Fang, Xiao Junzhu, Madame Hong, Princess Jianning, that girl Shuang'er, plus that Miss Zheng who threw the dice, put together are not as beautiful as this fairy. I, Wei Xiaobao, do not want to be the Emperor, I don't want to be the Shen Long Jiao's Jiaozhu, I don't want to be Tian Di Hui's Zongduozhu. Some Yellow Magua or three peacock feathers, one-pin or two-pin rank officer, I don't care about all those things, I ... I only want to be this Miss' husband."

In that instant, myriads of thoughts filled his mind, he was determined to go through water and tread on fire, to risk his life and limbs, to realize his dream; consequently, his expression looked very strange. To the four monks and two women who were looking at him, he looked just like an idiot: suddenly beaming with joy, and then suddenly clenching his jaw.

"Shishuzu," Jing Ji and Jing Qing called several times, but Wei Xiaobao was totally oblivious to them. Only after a long time, did he finally wake up as if from a dream, and blew out a breath.

At first the woman in blue thought that Wei Xiaobao was a horny philanderer; afterwards, seeing his blank look, she thought this little monk must be a lunatic, and found it amusing. She asked, "So this little monk is your Shishuzu?"

Jing Ji hastily said, "Miss, please be a bit more respectful. This senior monk's Buddhist name is Hui on the top and Ming on the bottom. In our Temple, he is one of the only two Senior Monks with 'Hui' generation-character; he is our head monk, the Abbot's Shidi."

The two women were slightly startled, but then they thought they were joking; they shook their heads in disbelief. The woman in green laughed and said, "Shijie, he is swindling us, don't be fooled. This little ... little master, how can he be a senior monk?"

Her voice was melodious, sweet and charming, tender and alluring. Hearing her, Wei Xiaobao’s soul flew and scattered away, he could not help but repeating, “This little ... little master, how can he be a senior monk?" But the way he said it sounded frivolous, with no effort to conceal his uncouthness. The two women’s faces immediately sank, the four Jing generation monks also felt that this young martial granduncle kind of forgetting his manners too much, hence they were very ashamed.

“Humph,” the woman in blue snorted and asked, “Are you a Shaolin Temple’s senior monk?”

“A monk is a monk,” Wei Xiaobao said, “Nothing senior about it. You can see that I am short, I am nothing more than a short monk[1].”

The eyebrows of the woman in blue shot up; in loud and clear voice she said, “I heard people say that Shaolin Temple’s martial art is the leader of the world, their seventy-two unsurpassed skills are immeasurably deep. We, the two sisters, envied it in our hearts, and have come here specifically to admire it. Unexpectedly, your martial art is so-so, worse yet, the monks of the Temple do not observe propriety, oily-mouthed and smooth talking, just like the hoodlums of the marketplace, making other people sorely disappointed. Shimei, let us go!” Finished speaking, she turned around to exit the Pavilion.

Jing Qing blocked in front of her, “Nu Shizhu [female benefactor] has come to Shaolin Temple, committed violence and hit people, even if you want to go, you must at least leave your revered master’s name.”

Hearing the words ‘committed violence and hit people’, Wei Xiaobao thought, “Turns out they have already assaulted people, no wonder Jing Qing and the others quarreled with them.” He saw red palm marks on the left cheeks of Jing Qing and Jing Ji, evidently they both have suffered a palm strike each.

Wei Xiaobao had chatted with everybody in the Temple, so he already knew the level of martial art skill of these four monks who were in charge of receiving the guests; in the Temple, they could be classified as less-developed. Because they had low martial art skill yet they were eloquent and fluent speakers, the Abbot assigned them the duty of receiving the benefactors who were going to perform their charitable deeds.

In the Wulin world, Shaolin Temple’s fame spanned more than a thousand years. The number of people who came to the temple each month to experience their martial art was too numerous to mention. The monks in charge of receiving the guests had low martial art skill, it was precisely because they were not supposed to fight. Otherwise, the Shaolin Dhyana Temple would turn into an arena where people fought for martial art supremacy. Not only it would disrupt their peace in meditation, it would also be a great disobedience to the Buddhist’s teaching about mercy, hence fighting was an unacceptable behavior.

Obviously the woman in blue did not understand this reason, she only thought that since with one strike she had succeeded in beating two Shaolin monks, she had a reason to be very proud of herself. She said, “Based on your mediocre martial art, you want your Miss to leave behind Shifu’s name, humph, do you think you deserve it?”

Jing Ji has just suffered defeat; he knew that with the five of them combined, they could not stop the women. If these two young women went down the mountain and proclaimed that they had beaten two Shaolin monks and then shook their sleeves and left, while even their origins were unknown, where would they put Shaolin Temple’s reputation at? Thereupon he said, “The four of us have the duty to receive benefactors, our martial art skill is extremely low, and those who have left home hold friendship as our foundation, how can we meaninglessly fight with others? Since the two of you have come to get advice about our humble Temple’s martial art, please wait for a moment, pinseng [impoverished monk] will invite several Shibo and Shishu [martial (older) uncle and martial (younger) uncle] to come, we will introduce them to you.” Finished speaking, he turned around to rush toward the Temple.

Suddenly a blue shadow flashed. Jing Ji angrily shouted, “You …” ‘Slap’ he was thrown tumbling down on the ground. It was the woman in blue who ran after him and stretched out her leg to hook his feet. Jing Ji sprang up and angrily said, “Nu Shizhu, why are you …”

The woman in blue laughed aloud and sent a right punch. Jing Ji hastily raised his right arm to block. The woman in blue grabbed with her left hand, ‘Crack!’ unexpectedly she dislocated his right arm joint. There was a series of ‘Crack!’, ‘Aiyo!’, ‘Clack, clack!’ as in an instant she also broke either the other three monks’ wrist bones or their arm joints. The four monks withdrew to the side, completely unable to resist. Jing Ji turned around and rushed back to the Temple to report.

Wei Xiaobao was so scared that he was at a loss of what to do, and was completely helpless. Suddenly the back of his neck tightened, someone grabbed him, while at the same time sealed the acupoint on the back of his neck. Immediately his whole body went limp and painful, he could not exert his strength. He saw the woman in blue was standing in front of him, in that case, the one grabbing his back was obviously the girl in green. His heart was wild with joy. “Wonderful! Wonderful!” he shouted loudly.

Having his back grabbed by the girl, Wei Xiaobao felt he had not walked in this world in vain. It would be best if she added several kicks to his behind, or landed several punches on the top of his head. Even if he were killed immediately, he would enjoy infinite pleasure and would think that his good fortune in love department was great. This moment his nostrils caught a whiff of light, delicate fragrance, hence he called out, “Smells good, smells good!”

The woman in blue angrily said, “This little bald thief is so rotten. Meizi, cut his nose!”

“Alright!” Wei Xiaobao heard a charming voice from behind him, “But let me dig his pair of thief eyeballs first.” And then he felt the fingers of a warm, soft and smooth hand pressed against his left eyelid.

“Please dig it slowly, don’t do it too quickly,” Wei Xiaobao shouted.

The girl was surprised, “Why?” she asked.

“It would be best if you grab me like this,” Wei Xiaobao replied, “Grab me for a lifetime, never let me go, forever.”

The girl angrily said, “Little monk, you are at the death’s door, and still speaking nonsense to me?”

Wei Xiaobao suddenly felt a sharp pain on his right eye; the girl was really going to dig his eyeball out. Greatly shocked, he bent his waist and lowered his head, all reasons and logic were thrown away beyond the ninth level of clouds, both hands reached backward, he only hoped he could pry open the hand holding the back of his neck. The girl punched him on the back. Wei Xiaobao screamed, “Aiyo! Mama!” His hands frantically clawed backward, unconsciously he had launched the move ‘Di Qing subduing the dragon’ that Hong Jiaozhu had taught him. Suddenly he felt both of hands touched something soft; unexpectedly he had grabbed the girl’s breasts.

This style was originally intended to force the enemy behind his back to withdraw, then he would somersault backward and ride on the enemy’s neck. Who would have thought that the girl did not have much experience dealing with the enemy and did not guard against Wei Xiaobao’s grabbing her chest? Since the result was entirely different than what was expected, naturally the second half of the move ‘Di Qing subduing the dragon’ could not be executed.

The girl was shocked and ashamed at the same time, she brought her outstretched arms inside and caught Wei Xiaobao’s arms and ‘crack, crack!’ she broke the joints of both of his elbows. This move was called ‘the young swallow returns to its nest’, a refined name, but was actually a killer move from the ‘separating tendon dislocating bone technique’. It was followed by a flying kick, sending Wei Xiaobao reeling about a zhang or so.

The girl was extremely angry, she pulled the willow-leaf saber from her waist and violently chopped it down on Wei Xiaobao’s back. Wei Xiaobao hastily rolled around and finally rolled underneath the stone table in the middle of the pavilion. The girl’s saber struck the ground, sparks flew in all directions; she kicked with her left foot, kicking Wei Xiaobao from underneath the table.

“Shimei,” the woman in blue called out, “You must not kill him!”

The girl in green acted as if she did not hear, she forcefully chopped down on Wei Xiaobao’s back again. “Aiyo!” Wei Xiaobao screamed again, “I want my Mommy!” The girl in green chopped down twice more, the chop was so hard that Wei Xiaobao felt the pain in his bone and marrow. Luckily he had his treasured undergarment to protect him that he was not injured.

The girl in green wanted to chop again, but the woman in blue pulled her own saber; ‘clang!’ she stopped her steel saber while calling out, “This little monk will not live, let us quickly leave!” She thought that they had killed a monk in the Temple, the disaster they brought to themselves was indeed not small.

The girl in green had received significant disgrace, plus she believed she had killed this little monk, shock and shame mixed together, suddenly tears streamed down her cheeks, she raised her saber and slashed it across her own neck. The woman in blue was greatly alarmed, hastily she stretched out her saber to block; although she managed to divert the blade of her saber, but the tip of the saber still scratched across her neck, blood gushed out instantly.

“Shimei,” the woman in blue cried out in fear, “You … you … what are you doing?”

The girl in green’s vision darkened, she blacked out and fell down to the ground. The woman in blue threw her saber away and rushed to catch her. “Shimei!” she cried out, “You … you … you must not die!”

Suddenly she heard a voice behind her. “Amitabha Buddha, must save her quick.”

The woman in blue cried, she said, “It’s … it’s too late.”

She saw a hand reached out from behind, the fingers continuously moving, sealing the acupoints surrounding the wound on the girl in green’s neck, followed by a voice, “Saving people is urgent, Miss please don’t blame me.” ‘Rip, rip’ he tore a piece of his own robe and wrapped the girl in green’s neck, and then he stooped down to carry her up.

The woman in blue was at a loss of what to do; she stood up and saw the man was an old monk with white long beard hanging down to his chest. As he held the girl in green in his arms, he rushed up the mountain. The woman in blue was frightened; she had no choice but to follow behind him. She saw the old monk was carrying her martial sister entering Shaolin Temple's main gate, immediately she followed in.

Wei Xiaobao crawled out from underneath the stone table; his arms had already refused to follow his command, they hung down limply on his sides. He thought, "This ... this Miss is very vicious, why did she want to commit suicide? If she is really dead, what will happen? I ... I'd better escape, damn it."

But as soon as he thought about the girl’s exceptional countenance, his heart boiled, and he made up his mind: “I must not run away, I must take a look at her.” His arms were extremely painful, cold sweats as big as soy beans were dripping from his forehead; bracing himself, he walked up the mountain.

He only walked for about a dozen steps when he saw more than ten monks rushing out from the Temple to help him and the other three Jing generation monks back to the Temple. All five of them were treated from their dislocated bones injuries. Grab and capture [qin na], tumbling and bare-hand fighting were the best among Shaolin Pai’s martial arts, immediately there was a monk coming to fix their arms.

Wei Xiaobao was eager to see the girl, he asked the two women's whereabouts, and immediately walked toward the eastern courtyard's meditation room. He had just rounded a corner along a corridor when he saw eight monks with jiedao[2] in their hands, walking straight toward him. These eight monks were law enforcer monks from the Jielu [monastic disciple] Courtyard. The leader bowed and said, "Shishuzu, Fangzhang Dashi requests the pleasure of seeing you."

"Very well," Wei Xiaobao replied, "I want to see that little Miss first, I wonder if she is alive or dead."

The monk said, "Fangzhang Dashi is waiting at the Jielu Courtyard, asking Shishuzu to come over immediately."

"Damn it," Wei Xiaobao angrily said, "I said I want to see that pretty little Miss first; didn't you hear?" Usually his temperament was good, now that his heart was anxious, unexpectedly he was cursing at people in the Temple.

The eight monks looked at each other in dismay, they did not dare to stop him. Immediately four monks followed behind him, while the other four continued to summon Jing Ji and the others, four welcoming-guest monks.

Wei Xiaobao arrived at the Eastern Courtyard's meditation room and asked, "The Little Miss did not die?"

An old monk replied, "Reporting to Shishu: the injury is not heavy, Xiao Seng [little/lowly monk] is giving her medical treatment." Wei Xiaobao felt relieved immediately.

The woman in blue was standing by the door, she pointed to Wei Xiaobao and cursed, "This little monk is not good."

---

[1] The character ‘gao’ in Gao Seng (Senior Monk) literally means ‘tall’.

[2] Buddhist monk's knife (not used for killing).

[foxs]

Wei Xiaobao stuck out his tongue to her. He hesitated for a moment, but in the end he did not dare to enter the room. Turning around, he went to Jielu Courtyard. He saw the gate to the Courtyard was wide open, several dozen monks wearing kasaya were standing on either side of the gate, their expression solemn. The four monks escorting him with the Buddhist knife in their hands opened their mouths together, "Reporting to Fangzhang [Abbot]: Monk Hui Ming is here."

Seeing this kind of expression, Wei Xiaobao mused, "Who do you think you are? The Grand Master of the Courtroom? His granny, what an air." Entering the great hall, he saw several dozen candles were lighted in front of the image of Buddha, the Abbot, Hui Cong Chanshi stood on the left head-position, while on the right stood an old monk, big and tall, whose expression did not show any anger, yet his standing was evident; he was the head of Jielu Courtyard, Cheng Shi Chanshi. Jing Ji, Jing Qing, and the others, four monks, stood below the head-position.

"Shidi," Hui Cong Chanshi said, "Pay your respect to Tathagata." Wei Xiaobao kneeled down in worship.

Hui Cong Chanshi waited until Wei Xiaobao finished paying his respect and stood up before saying, "I will have to bother Shidi to explain what happened at the Pavilion halfway up the mountain to the Head of Jielu Courtyard."

Wei Xiaobao said, "I heard them quarrelling, hence I came over to take a look. As for why they quarreled, I don't have any clue. Jing Ji, why don't you explain?"

"Yes," Jing Ji said. Turning around, he said, "Reporting to Fangzhang and Head of Jielu Courtyard Shishu: disciples, four people, were welcoming the guests at the Pavilion halfway up the mountain. Those two Nu Shizhu have come to the Temple to join in charitable deeds. That was what they tactfully reported to us. Our Temple has always had a custom of not receiving Nu Shizhu. The Nu Shizhu who is slightly older said, 'I heard Shaolin Temple claims itself to be the orthodox school of martial art, each one of the seventy-two unsurpassed artistry is unequalled in the present age. We are here to increase our knowledge, we want to see how formidable it really is.' Disciple replied, 'Our humble Temple does not dare to claim to have unequalled martial art in the present age. Each school, each sect under the heavens has its own strong points, how can Shaolin Pai dare to be arrogant and conceited?'"

Hui Cong Fangzhang said, "You said it well, it was very fitting."

Jing Ji said, "That Nu Shizhu said, 'In that case, Shaolin Pai only enjoys unearned reputation with their 'three-legged cat' boxing technique, isn't that a joke?' Disciple said, 'May I ask which school do the two Nu Shizhu belong to? Whose senior Wulin master's distinguished disciples are you?'"

"Exactly," Hui Cong said, "Those two young women came to this Temple to cause trouble, to look down on our Sect's martial art, their background must be noteworthy, so we should ask clearly their school's origin."

Jing Ji said, "That Nu Shizhu said, 'Do you want to know our school's origin? That's very easy; as soon as you see it, you will know.' Suddenly she made her move and struck disciple and Jing Qing Shidi with her palm. Her movement was very fast, disciple did not guard beforehand, I am very ashamed, unexpectedly I was not able to evade at all. Jing Qing Shidi said, 'How can you play rough and beat people?' That Nu Shizhu laughed and said, 'You asked my school's origin; talking is cheap, action shows result. Now you have seen it, don't you recognize it?' Speaking to this point Hui Ming Shishuzu arrived."

Cheng Shi asked, "When that Nu Shizhu struck you, what technique did she use?"

Jing Ji, Jing Qing lowered their heads and said, "Disciple did not see clearly."

Cheng Shi turned to the other two monks, "You did not take a beating, shouldn't you be able to see the technique that Nu Shizhu used?"

The two monks said, "We only heard 'slap, slap' twice, two Shixiong have been slapped, the woman's hand did not seem to move at all, even her body did not move."

Cheng Shi looked at the Abbot, waiting for his decision. Hui Cong pondered deeply for a moment, then he ordered the monk on duty, "Invite the Heads of Damo Hall and Bo're Hall[1] to come over here."

Not too long afterwards, the two head monks arrive in succession. The Head of Damo Hall was Cheng Xin, the head of the Eighteen Luohan who went to Mount Wutai to rescue the Old Emperor. The Head of Bo're Hall was Cheng Guan Chanshi, an old monk about eighty years of age. The two monks paid their respect to the Abbot.

Hui Cong said, "There are two Nu Shizhu who came to our Temple to create trouble; we don't know which school or sect they belong to. The two of you have extensive knowledge and vast experience, please join us in considering this matter in detail." And he recounted what had happened immediately.

Cheng Xin said, "All along the four martial nephews have never seen her move, but two of you suffered palm strike on your faces. Our Sect's Thousand-Leaf Hands, Wudang Pai's Circling Wind Palm, Kunlun Pai's Falling Wild Goose Fist, as well as Kongtong Pai's Flying Phoenix Hand, all have this kind of technique."

Hui Cong said, "Just based on these two palm strikes, we cannot tell her martial art school. Shidi, how did you fight with them?"

Wei Xiaobao said, "That lady in blue broke four ... four monks' hands first ..." Hui Cong inquired how the four monks had their arms and wrists dislocated. The four monks then successively narrated and acted what had happened to them.

Cheng Xin was watching with rapt attention; he questioned in detail about the woman's technique one by one, finally he turned to Wei Xiaobao and said, "May I ask Shishu, how did that Miss break the Senior's arms?"

Wei Xiaobao said, "The back of my, the Senior's, neck was grabbed by that good-looking Miss, immediately my body was numb, she was grabbing right here." While saying that, he pointed to the back of his neck.

Cheng Xin nodded and said, "That is the Dazhui [big hammer] acupoint, the most vital acupoint on human's body."

Wei Xiaobao said, "I reached backward to get her arm off me, but she punched me on my back; it was so painful I almost died. I, the Senior, was anxious, I clawed wildly backward, and grabbed her chest. This little Miss was also anxious, she broke my arms, threw me to the ground, and chopped me randomly. Damn it, killing people does not need any capital, she was determined to murder her husband and wanted to be a young widow."

Hearing him blabbering nonsense, the monks looked at each other in consternation. Cheng Xin stood behind him, he reached out to examine Wei Xiaobao, and saw that there were three saber slashes on the back of his Buddhist robe. He was shocked and said, "She chopped you three times; Shishu, how is your injury?"

Wei Xiaobao was immensely proud of himself; he said, "I have treasured clothes to protect me, I am not injured at all. Fortunately those three chops did not land on my bald head. That little sister chopped me but I did not die, she must be scared out of her wits, thinking that my, the Senior's, martial art skill was immeasurably deep; therefore, she had no choice but slashing her own neck. Actually, my martial art skill is sloppy and ordinary, but she has a countenance of a flower, face like the moon, so I, the Senior, can't possibly make things difficult for her ..."

Hui Cong was afraid he might continue blabbering nonsense, hence he interrupted, "Shidi, that's enough."

Now the crowd of monks understood the reason why that young woman wanted to kill herself; it was because her breasts were grabbed, she had received enormous humiliation. But at that time Wei Xiaobao's life was hanging on a thread, the three slashes on his robe were the evidence. In critical situation, he randomly grabbed backward and touched whatever part of the enemy's body, so nobody could say he should be blamed. His martial art skill was low, he was grabbed by the enemy and was struggling for his life, how could his action follow any kind of rule?

Cheng Shi's countenance immediately turned gentle; he said, "Shishu, previously I heard that Nu Shizhu kept saying and cursing that you did not observe Buddhist monastic rule, that you violated religious commandment by taking liberty with women, therefore, you have committed a serious offense. Turns out it was an accident during the struggle, so we cannot say that you have violated the monastic discipline. Shishu, please sit down." Personally he picked a chair and placed it next to Hui Cong. By doing this, he was saying that since you did not violate the monastic discipline, Jielu Courtyard did not need to deal with you, you were still my superior in the Temple, then I should show my respect to you.

Giggling, Wei Xiaobao sat down. Seeing his frivolous behavior and senseless talk, Cheng Shi could not help but saying, "Although Shishu did not violate the Buddhist monastic discipline against sexual conduct, when you see the Nu Shizhu, you must maintain your dignity and stern facial expression, you must not fail to show the Shaolin Temple's eminent monk's elegant demeanor."

Wei Xiaobao laughed and said, "My eminent monk status is informal, I got it just to make up the number, it should not be taken seriously."

Hui Cong was about to open his mouth in admonition when the Head of Bo're Hall, Cheng Guan, suddenly said, "There is no school."

Cheng Xin asked in surprise, "Shixiong is saying that those two Nu Shizhu do not belong to any school?"

"They learned martial art by stealing!" Cheng Guan said, "The ‘separating tendon dislocating bone technique’ of those two women contains Wudang, Kunlun, Kongtong and Diancang, four Sects' technique. The three saber slashes on Shishu's back contain Emei, Jingcheng and Shanxi's Luhe Saber[2], three schools' saber technique. It was a random mixture of several techniques; not only that, their mastery is not perfect. There is no sect in the world with that kind of martial art."

Wei Xiaobao was greatly astonished, "Uh," he said, "You can tell the origin of each move in the style they used?"

He did not know that Cheng Guan left home to become a Buddhist monk in the Shaolin Temple when he was only eight years old; for more than seventy years he had single-mindedly study martial art, and had never left the Temple's gate for even one step. He had read extensively ancient books on martial art, his knowledge was vast.

In Shaolin Temple, Damo Hall specialized in researching their own martial art, while Bo're Hall actually specialized in researching the martial art of each house and sect under the heavens. The several dozen of eminent monks of the Bo're Hall were all proficient in one or more sects' martial art.

In the last years of Sui Dynasty, the monks of Shaolin Temple had helped Li Shimin flattening Wang Shichong[3]; from that moment on, their martial art has overawed the world. For the next thousand years their reputation did not diminish, admittedly it was because their Sect's martial art was broad and profound; but the fact that Bo're Hall researching other sects' martial art was also one of the principal factors. After acquiring thorough understanding of other sects' martial art, first, they would analyze the strength and weakness of each martial art style, to patch up the inadequacy of their own martial art; second, if they had any confrontation with other sects' experts, by knowing the ins and outs of the opponents' skill, they would gain great advantage.

As Shaolin disciples went out in Jianghu to perform their heroic deeds, when they returned, they would pay their respect to the Abbot and their own master first, and then they would go to Jielu Courtyard to report if there was any fault, next they would go to Bo're Hall to report what they saw and heard. If there was any style or move belonging to other sect worth having, the monk of Bo're Hall would then record everything. In this way, after accumulating such records for a thousand years, they knew various schools' martial art from all over the world like the back of their hands. Even if there was no talented person with outstanding ability and wisdom in the Temple, Shaolin Pai could still be considered the leader of the realm.

Cheng Guan single-mindedly studied martial art, he knew nothing about the way of the world, his conduct was rather naive, but his understanding of each school and sect's martial art was very clear. When a scholar reads too many books, he is known as a 'bookworm'; this Cheng Guan Chanshi learned too many martial arts that he had become 'martial art worm'[4]. In all his life, other than sparring with his fellow disciples, he had never exchanged a move or half a style with outsiders; yet his knowledge of martial art studies was vast, he could even be considered the top among his peers, the monks of the Temple.

Cheng Xin said, "Turns out the two Nu Shizhu do not belong to any school or sect; this matter become slightly easier to handle. When that Miss' injury is healed, we can send them off from the Temple, then there won't be any future trouble."

Cheng Shi said, "Those two martial sisters' technique are compatible with each other, apparently they have a Shifu."

Cheng Xin said, "Even if they have a Shifu, it can't be a renowned master from a famous school or major sect."

Cheng Shi nodded. Abbot Hui Cong said, "The two Nu Shizhu are young and love to meddle. In this affair we have not made any serious error. Nevertheless, we must not fail to show courtesy, we must treat the two Nu Shizhu well. You are dismissed." Finished speaking, he stood up.

Cheng Xin smiled and said, "At first I thought there was a martial art in Wulin world who instructed these two young women, with the intention to humiliate our Sect; I was a little worried. Shaolin Temple has enjoyed our reputation for a thousand years, it must not fall in our hands." All the monks smiled and nodded their heads.

Wei Xiaobao suddenly said, "In my opinion, the name of Shaolin Pai's martial art is resounding, but actually it is only so-so."

Hui Cong had just about to go out the door, as soon as he heard it, he turned his head in shock. Wei Xiaobao said, "Jing Ji, Jing Qing, how long have you been training martial art?"

Jing Ji said that he had been training for fourteen years, Jing Qing for twelve years; they both admitted that their intelligence was low, and had not made any progress, hence they were extremely ashamed.

Abbot Hui Cong said, "We are studying Buddhism here, our aspiration is to understand the way to free ourselves, whether our martial art skill is high or low is inessentials."

Wei Xiaobao shook his head and said, "I think there's a major flaw in that argument. These two young girls are at most twenty years old, plus they were only stealing one move from the east, one style from the west, to create some hodgepodge three-legged cat moves of their own school or sect, yet they were able to beat Shaolin monks with more than ten years of training that we flee to the wilderness and piss in our pants in terror, without any ability to parry and die without a burial site. It seems to me that Wudang Pai, Kunlun Pai's one move or half a style is a lot more formidable than our orthodox Shaolin Pai's martial art."

Hui Cong, Cheng Shi, Cheng Xin, and the other monks looked very awkward. Although Wei Xiaobao's words were extremely offensive to hear, momentarily they found it very difficult to refute. They all thought, "Jing Ji and the others, four people's martial art skill is extremely disappointing, how can we say it is an orthodox Shaolin Pai's martial art?"

Yet Cheng Guan nodded his head and said, "What Shishu said makes a perfect sense."

Cheng Shi was surprised, "Why did Shixiong say it makes sense?"

Cheng Guan said, "Other people's hodgepodge martial art beats our orthodox martial art; there is something wrong here."

---

[1] 'Damo' - Dharma, the teaching of Buddha, 'Bo're' - Prajna, the great wisdom. Actually, for Damo, the original Chinese uses 'courtyard/institution' (yuan) instead of 'hall' (tang), but since the term 'Damo Hall' is widely known, I decided to use 'Damo Hall'.

[2] Not sure about this, Shanxi Luhe Dao literally means 'six-direction (north, south, east, west, and up and down) saber of Shanxi'.

[3] Li Shimin was the personal name of second Tang Emperor Taizong, Wang Shichong was a general of late Sui, opponent of early Tang.

[4] Bookworm: orig. 书呆子 (shu daizi) - bookish fool; Cheng Guan was a 武呆子 (wu daizi) - martial art fool.

[foxs]

Hui Cong said, "People's natural endowments are not the same. Jing Ji and the others are not very good at martial art, but they are busy with receiving visitors to our Temple, it means they are rendering great merit in propagating Buddhist teaching. Jing Ji, Jing Qing, Jing Ben, Jing Yuan, the four of you delegate your receiving-visitors duty to others, you may devote your time in practicing martial art." Jing Ji and the others, four monks bowed in compliance.

The monks left Jielu Courtyard. Wei Xiaobao shook his head. Cheng Guan knitted his brows; he was deep in thought for half a day, then he also shook his head. Hui Cong and Cheng Xin looked at each other; they both thought, "These two, one old the other young, are both ignorant people, we should not pay them any attention." Without a word they walked out.

Cheng Guan turned his gaze toward the courtyard, where a maidenhair tree's leaf was floating slowly to the ground; he had a sudden inspiration. "Shishu," he said, "I want to see those Nu Shizhu."

Wei Xiaobao was ecstatic, "Nothing could be better than that," he said, "I am coming with you."

The two of them went to the Eastern Courtyard's meditation room. The old monk treating the girl in green's injury came out to greet them. Wei Xiaobao asked, "Can she die?"

The old monk replied, "The saber cut is not deep, nothing serious, she won't die."

"Wonderful, wonderful," Wei Xiaobao happily said, as he entered the meditation room.

He saw the girl in green was lying on the couch, her eyes were shut tight, her face was so white that it looked almost transparent, her neck was wrapped with cotton and a piece of plain white cloth, her right hand was outside the quilt, her five fingers were slender and looked delicate, it really looked like the fingers were carved from a piece of white jade. At the end of the fingers, there were five tiny round spirals. Wei Xiaobao's heart was greatly moved, he could not control his strong desire to stroke the beautiful, extremely adorable small hand. "I wonder if she still has the pulse," he said. Pretending to feel the pulse, he reached out to touch the hand.

The woman in blue had been standing at the foot of the bed. Seeing Wei Xiaobao walked in, her anger had already shot to the sky. "Don't touch my Meizi!" she shouted. Seeing he did not withdraw his hand at all, her left hand stretched out, she wanted to grab his wrist.

Cheng Guan flicked his middle finger toward the Yanggu [lit. positive valley] acupoint on the side of her left palm; he said, "You are using the Hao Family of Shanxi's qin na technique."

The woman in blue withdrew her hand, while sending her elbow out at the same time. Cheng Guan extended his finger to flick the Xiaohai [lit. minor ocean] acupoint at the base of her elbow. The woman in blue countered with a right backhand strike. Cheng Guan's middle finger flicked again, forcing her to stop midway and withdrew one step back. The young woman was startled and angry at the same time, she moved her fists like whirlwind, and in an instant she had already sent seven or eight punches.

Cheng Guan nodded his head continuously, while his finger also flicked seven, eight times. "Aiyo!" the girl screamed, the Qinglengyuan [lit. clear and cold abyss] on her right arm was hit by his finger, her arm immediately went limp. "Dead monk!" she cursed.

Cheng Guan was surprised. "I am alive," he said, "If I were a dead monk, how could I use my finger to flick you?"

Seeing his formidable martial art, the girl was actually scared, but she was unwilling to lose the argument; she cursed, "You are still alive today, you will be dead tomorrow."

Cheng Guan was startled. "How does Nu Shizhu know?" he asked, "Could it be that you have the foreknowledge?"

“Humph,” the girl said, “Shaolin Temple monks are oily-mouthed and smooth talkers.”

She thought Cheng Guan was joking with her, she did not know that although this old monk had a superb martial art skill, he was completely oblivious of other affairs. All his life he had never left the Temple. All the monks in the Temple strictly maintained Buddhist monastic disciple against wild talk, there had never been one person who told him any lie; thereupon he always thought that there was no such thing as untrue statement in the world.

Hearing the girl said that Shaolin Temple monks were oily-mouthed and smooth talkers, he thought, “Could it be that in the vegetarian dish today there was too much soy bean oil?” Extending his sleeve, he wiped his lips, but did not see any oil. He rolled his tongue around in his mouth, but did not feel anything greasy or slippery.

While he was still in the state of bewilderment, the woman in blue hissed, “Get out! Don’t wake my Shimei.”

“Yes, yes …” Cheng Guan said, “Shishu, let’s get out of here.”

Wei Xiaobao was staring at the girl lying on the couch, he was already not in his right mind for quite some time. He grunted his acknowledgement, but did not move a single step. The woman in blue slowly walked toward his back, suddenly her palms shot out, she gave him a violent push. “Ah!” Wei Xiaobao screamed, he was sent flying out of the room, and ‘Bang!’ he landed heavily on the ground. “Aiyo, aiyo!” he cried out, unable to crawl up.

Cheng Guan said, “That was the ‘rivers pour away by the day’, part of the Laoshan Pai’s palm technique. But Nu Shizhu did not use it properly.” While his mouth was prattling, he walked out of the room to help Wei Xiaobao up and said, “Shishu, the palm push that she did, altogether there are thirteen ways to deal with it. If you did not want to fight with her, then there are six ways to dodge it, any one of those six may be used easily. Supposing you want to strike back, you can employ wrist hook, elbow strike, finger flick, reverse acupoint sealing, arm seizing, diagonal block, or backward kick, seven techniques; each technique can be used to neutralize her.”

Wei Xiaobao was thrown down that his back and arms were hurting, he was not in a good mood at all. “Why do you tell me all this now?” he asked, “What’s the use?”

“Yes,” Cheng Guan said, “Shishu’s admonition is correct, your Shizhi [martial nephew] was wrong. If I told you beforehand, even if Shishu did not mean to make things difficult for her, if you only wanted to evade, you would not have to be thrown like that.”

Wei Xiaobao’s heart was moved, “Those two girls are very vicious; when we meet again later, they would immediately punch and kick me, which would be hard to ward off. This old monk is very familiar with those two girls’ martial art; just with a flick of his finger he forced them away that they did not dare to come over anymore. I want to take that girl to be my wife, I must swindle the old monk that he will be with me to protect me.” But then he had a second thought, “This old monk is so old, I don’t know how many more days he will live; supposing he is gone tomorrow, won’t that be really bad for me?” Thereupon he said, “Just now you flicked your finger several times and that girl is immediately tamed. What kind of martial art was that?”

Cheng Guan said, “It is called ‘one finger Dhyana’; Shishu does not know it?”

“I don’t,” Wei Xiaobao replied, “Why don’t you teach me?”

Cheng Guan said, “Shishu’s order ought to be followed. This ‘one finger Dhyana’ is not difficult to learn; if you know the accurate location of acupoints, and the power on your finger can penetrate the opponent’s acupoint, then you can do it.”

Wei Xiaobao was greatly delighted, “That’s wonderful,” he hastily said, “Quickly teach me.” He thought that if he could master this skill, he only needed to flick several times, the girl in green would not be able to move a single step, and then if he wanted her to be his wife, wouldn’t that be easy? Besides, the words ‘not difficult to learn’ were more important to him; all the amazing martial art skills in the world, nothing exceeded this. In an instant he was beaming with joy, his heart was unbearably itching.

Cheng Guan said, “I wonder Shishu’s ‘tendon altering sutra’ internal energy cultivation has been trained to which level? Would you please try to flick your finger?”

“How do you flick your finger?” Wei Xiaobao asked.

Cheng Guan bent his finger and flicked. ‘Chi’ a burst of powerful wind shot out, a dead leaf on the ground floated up.

Wei Xiaobao laughed, “That looks fun,” he said. Copying Cheng Guan, he bent his right hand thumb to hold his middle finger, and then flicked the middle finger out. Naturally this time there was no sound, nothing happened; even no dust was stirred the least bit.

Cheng Guan said, “Turns out Shishu has not trained ‘tendon altering sutra’ internal energy cultivation. If you want to train this internal energy cultivation, you must train Bo’re [Prajna/Wisdom] Palm first. Let me spar with you in Bo’re Palm, I want to see the depth of Shishu’s palm strength, then I can teach you the ‘tendon altering sutra’.”

Wei Xiaobao said, “I don’t know Bo’re Palm.”

“Not a problem,” Cheng Guan said, “Let us spar in ‘Picking Flower Grab and Capture’.”

“What ‘Picking Flower Grab and Capture’? I have never heard of it,” Wei Xiaobao said.

An awkward expression appeared on Cheng Guan’s face, he said, “How about we try something more basic? ‘Vajra [Budda’s warrior attendant] Divine Palm’ should be fine. You don’t know it either? How about ‘Boluomi [Paramita] Hand’? Don’t know as well? How about ‘Scattering Flower Palm’? Ah right, Shishu is still young, you have not learned these different palm techniques. How about ‘Weituo Palm’? ‘Subduing Tiger Fist’? ‘Luohan Fist’? ‘Shaolin Long Fist’?” Each time he mentioned a fist technique, Wei Xiaobao shook his head.

Seeing Wei Xiaobao did not know any fist technique, Cheng Guan did not get angry; he said, “Our Shaolin Pai martial art must be trained in sequence. When one enters our school, one must learn ‘Shaolin Long Fist’ first. After he masters it, then he will learn ‘Luohan Fist’, afterwards ‘Subduing Tiger Fist’. When he has appropriate foundation in both internal and external energy, he may learn ‘Weituo Palm’. If he does not want to learn ‘Weituo Palm’, he can train 'Great Compassion Great Sorrow Thousand-Leaf Hand' instead …”

Wei Xiaobao’s lips started to move, he wanted to say, “I know this 'Great Compassion Great Sorrow Thousand-Leaf Hand'.” But he stopped himself immediately, realizing that the 'Great Compassion Great Sorrow Thousand-Leaf Hand' Hai Laogong taught him, perhaps nine out of ten moves were fake; no matter what, he could not say that he ‘knew’ this technique.

He heard Cheng Guan continued, “Either the ‘Weituo Palm’ or the 'Great Compassion Great Sorrow Thousand-Leaf Hand', one with intelligence and diligence will need about seven or eight years to master. If his comprehension is strong, he can continue with ‘Scattering Flower Palm’. After he masters the ‘Scattering Flower Palm’, not many disciples of Wulin’s other sect can defeat him. Whether he can continue with Boluomi Hand depends on his temper. Take Jing Ji, Jing Qing, those several martial nephews for example, they all trained in ‘Subduing Tiger Fist’, but they don’t have the patience to train martial art, their progress is rather slow. In ten years’ time, Jing Qing perhaps can train ‘Weituo Palm’. Jing Ji cannot concentrate in learning martial art, I think it would be better for him to specialize in Vajra Sutra’s Zen meditation.”

Wei Xiaobao sucked in a mouthful of cold air; he said, “You said that that ‘one finger Dhyana’ is not difficult to learn, but from ‘Shaolin Long Fist’ followed by those other fist and palm techniques, all the way to mastering the ‘one finger Dhyana’, how many years must I train?”

Cheng Guan said, “This thing is actually recorded in the ancient book in Bo’re Hall. During the Later Jin of the Five Dynasties period, there was this Fa Hui Chanshi in our Temple, he had the innate intelligence, in less than thirty-six years from the time he entered the Temple, he had already mastered the ‘one finger Dhyana’; his advancement was amazingly quick, no one, before or after him, ever have the same progress. I guess he must be a great martial art scholar in his previous incarnation, so he brought with him many martial art skills from his previous existence. Next in line was during the establishment of the Southern Song Dynasty, there was this Ling Xing Chanshi, who spent less than thirty-nine years. Those two are rare talent with divine-given wisdom and intelligence, geniuses who are hard to come by in hundreds of years, who make other people full of admiration; a model older generation, someone who younger generation can only imagine.”

Wei Xiaobao asked, “How many years did you spend from the time you started training martial art until you master the ‘one finger Dhyana’?”

Cheng Guan smiled and said, “Shizhi has started training Shaolin Long Fist when I was eleven, I have been very lucky to have Hui Zhi Chanshi as my benevolent master, so I got to learn martial art at a lot higher pace than my fellow disciples. By the time I was fifty-three, I was able to comprehend my prying into our school’s sutra of this finger technique.”

Wei Xiaobao said, “Since you were eleven, until you were fifty-three, you were able to comprehend the kneeling in front of the door bolt (he did not know that the expression ‘lue kui men jing’ [comprehend the prying into the school’s sutra], what he heard was ‘lue gui men shuan’). So altogether you spent forty-two years before you master it?”

Cheng Guan was very proud of himself, he said, “To be able to master the ‘one finger Dhyana’, in the thousand plus years of our Sect’s history, Lao Na [old cassock] ranks the third.” After a short pause, he continued, “It’s just that Lao Na’s internal energy cultivation is only average. Strictly speaking about finger power, I am afraid my rank is lower than seventieth.” Speaking to this point, he could not help but feeling dejected.

Wei Xiaobao mused, “I don’t care if you rank the third or the seventy-third, Laozi did not bring any martial art skill from my previous incarnation, neither did I start training in my mother’s womb. If I have to spend forty-two years to master this finger technique, that girl and I will both be old man, old woman in our fifties or sixties; Laozi might as well train a fart!” He said, “Other people’s little miss only trains for one or two years, you must train for forty, fifty years to beat her; it’s extremely disappointing.”

Actually, Cheng Guan had already thought about this fact as well, all along he had been pondering about it. “Yes, yes!” he said, “Our Shaolin martial art is this inferior to others’, it’s really … really not … not too good.”

“What do you mean not too good?” Wei Xiaobao said, “It’s practically very bad. All of a sudden our Shaolin Pai is unable to grab Wulin’s cow’s ear, horse’s ear. You are the Head of Bo’re Hall, if you don’t think of something, won’t you let down the several thousands, several tens of thousands years of Shaolin Temple’s eminent monks? When you die and see that Fa something Chanshi, Ling something Chanshi, and my Shixiong, Hui Zhi Chanshi, everybody will ask you, saying that you only eat and defecate, but don’t care about anything else, you don’t want to think of a way to protect Shaolin Pai’s prestige, won’t you be so ashamed that you want to die all over again?”

Cheng Guan’s old face turned deep red; he was completely terrified. Repeatedly nodding his head, he said, “Shishu’s instruction is very true, when Shizhi comes back, I will peruse the ancient books in the Bo’re Hall, to see if there is an ingenious technique that can be learned in a short time.”

“That’s right,” Wei Xiaobao happily said, “If you cannot find any, our Shaolin Pai needs not mingle in the Wulin world anymore. We might as well invite those two little misses to let the older one becomes the Abbess, the younger one becomes the Head of Bo’re Hall. Let those two teach us martial art. Compared to our stupid head stupid brain clumsy martial art, theirs must be a lot stronger.”

Cheng Guan was startled, he asked, “Those two Nu Shizhu, how can they be our Temple’s Abbess and Head?”

“Who told you not to be able to find a martial art that can be trained quickly?” Wei Xiaobao said, “Fangzhang will lose face, you will lose face; that need not be mentioned, from now on Shaolin Pai will lose its foothold in Wulin, the several thousand monks of our Temple will have to do obeisance to these two little misses as their new masters. Everybody will question what’s the use of many dozens of years of training Shaolin martial arts? The two little misses only train for a year or half a year and they can ‘crack, crack, crack’ break Shaolin monks’ hands and feet. Everybody will think that preserving their hands and feet is more important, hence they might as well respectfully ask the Little Miss to be the Head of Bo’re Hall!”

This speech had made the sweat on Cheng Guan’s forehead streaming down his face; his hands did not stop trembling as with a trembling voice he said, “Yes, yes! Asking those two ladies to be our Temple’s Abbess and Head, ay, that … that will be too humiliating.”

“Isn’t that so?” Wei Xiaobao said, “By that time we cannot call ourselves Shaolin Pai anymore.”

Cheng Guan asked, “Then … then what should we call ourselves?”

Wei Xiaobao said, “We might as well bluntly call ourselves Shaonu[1] Pai. Shaolin Temple becomes Shaonu Temple. We must take down the signboard above the mountain gate, erase that ‘Lin’ character and change it to ‘Nu’ character. Only one character. That should be easy to do.”

---

[1] The character ‘shao’ of Shaolin means ‘young/little/lesser/minor’. Shaolin means ‘lesser forest’, Shaonu means ‘young maiden’.

[foxs]

Cheng Guan’s face turned ash-grey. “That won’t do, that won’t do!” he hastily said, “I … I am going to think of something. Shishu, please forgive Shizhi for not keeping you company you anymore.” Putting his palms together, he saluted, then turned around and left.

“Wait a moment!” Wei Xiaobao called, “This matter must be kept in strict confidence. If anybody in the Temple knew about it, it will be highly improper.”

“Why?” Cheng Guan asked.

“Nobody will believe you,” Wei Xiaobao replied, “They won’t know if you have thought of something. Those two young ladies are still recuperating in our Temple, if everybody is frightened, they might do obeisance and take those women as their masters. Shaolin Pai is such a big Sect, how can we scatter away just like that?”

Cheng Guan said, “Shishu’s direction is very true. This matter concerns the rise and fall, the existence or perishes of our Sect; absolutely it must be kept secret.” He was very grateful in his heart, thinking that although this martial uncle was young, his insight was far-reaching; indeed he deserved to be the respected Senior. If not for his clear sight and superior judgment, Shaolin Pai will inevitably become Shaonu Pai. Thousand-year fame cannot be redeemed in ten thousand years.

Seeing him leaving in a hurry, with the sleeve of his robe trembling, an obvious sign that he was in extreme panic, Wei Xiaobao thought, “Now that the old monk will stake his old life to find something, he is bound to find something. Everybody else would find a hundred mistakes in my speech, but as long as he did not say anything to anybody, this stupid monk won’t find out that I am swindling him.”

Thinking about the flowery countenance of the young woman lying on the couch, his heart was like a frisky monkey, his mind was like a cantering horse. He wanted to re-enter the room to look at her again. But after turning around and walking for only several steps, he suddenly saw the flashing blue skirt behind the curtain on the door. Thinking about the ruthlessness of the woman in blue, while he did not have Cheng Guan by his side to protect him, if he entered the room alone, he would definitely pay dearly. Without any other choice, he sighed and returned to his own meditation room.

The next day he woke up early in the morning and went straight to the Eastern Courtyard to visit. The old monk who treated her injury put his palms together and greeted him, “Good morning Shishu.”

“Is the Nu Shizhu’s injury getting better?” Wei Xiaobao asked.

The old monk replied, “That Nu Shizhu came to her senses in the middle of the night; realizing she was in our Temple, she insisted on leaving immediately, while saying rude words. Shizhi persuaded her nicely, but she said even if she died, she did not want to die in little ... little ... little monk's temple."

Hearing him humming and hawing, Wei Xiaobao knew that if the little miss did not scold him as 'little pervert thief', then she must have said 'little wicked monk'. "And then what happened?" he asked.

The old monk replied, "Shizhi advised her to leave the next morning, the Nu Shizhu struggled to get up, her Shijie helped her out. Shizhi did not dare to stop them, besides, that Nu Shizhu's injury won't be a problem anyway, so I had to let them go. I have reported this matter to the Abbot."

Wei Xiaobao nodded; he was quite disappointed, thinking, "Once this little miss left, I don't know where she is going. I don't even know her name or her surname, how am I going to find her?" He blamed the old monk for not handling this matter at the best of his ability and grumbled for a while. And then he had a second thought, "Those two girls are beautiful, they will greatly stand out from the masses. When they make their move, they have all schools all sects' martial arts in it; it should be possible to find them eventually." Thereupon he strolled toward Bo're Hall.

He saw Cheng Guan was sitting on the floor, with several hundred books piling up all around him. He had his hands supporting his head, and seemed to be very deep in thought; his eyes were bloodshot, most likely because he did not sleep at all the previous night. Looking at his appearance, it was obvious that he had not found anything good. He saw Wei Xiaobao walking in, but he simply stared at him blankly, as if he did not see him at all. Unexpectedly he was so immersed in his thought that he was completely oblivious of everything around him.

Seeing his distressed expression, Wei Xiaobao wanted to utter some words of encouragement, telling him that the two young ladies had left and that he had nothing to worry about for now. But then he had a second thought, "If he did not work diligently, how could he come up with good result? I am afraid as soon as I tell him, this old monk will goof off."

Quickly one month had passed. Wei Xiaobao often took a walk toward Bo're Hall. He saw Cheng Guan was getting thinner to the bone and looked alone and helpless, his countenance was wan and sallow, and never said anything to him. He looked like an idiot, sometimes he would stand up and punch and kick for a while, and then he would shake his head and sit down again. Wei Xiaobao only thought that this old monk was very stupid, after working hard for more than a month, he was still unable to find anything useful. He did not know that each one of Shaolin Pai martial arts paid particular attention to strong foundation, slow progress was preferable to a fast one. A crash course was precisely Shaolin martial arts' big taboo. Although Cheng Guan knew almost all martial arts under the heavens, for him to violate his own Sect's rule by creating a crash course technique was actually akin to asking him not to conform to the teachings he had been following all his life.

The weather was gradually getting warmer. Wei Xiaobao had been staying in the Temple for several months. Recently, there was not a day pass by when he did not think about that girl in green several dozen times in a day.

One particular day he felt stifled and was extremely bored. Taking his money, he went down Mount Shaoshi to the west, toward a small town of considerable size called Tantoupu. He went to a clothing store and bought a set of clothes, head covering, shoes and socks. Then he changed in a cave outside the town, putting the monk robe and shoes into a bundle, which he then slung over his shoulder. When he looked at his reflection on a mountain stream, he looked like a son of a wealthy family.

Returning to the small town, he went to a restaurant and indulged himself with chicken, duck, fish and meat. "I'll find a casino and gamble for a bit," he thought. Knowing that gambling establishments are usually located in alleys, he went through the streets and alleys, looking to the east and glancing to the west.

Each time he entered an alley, he listened to shouting and drinking sounds. By the time he entered the seventh alley, finally he heard someone shouted, "Pair of earth, heavenly nine king, sweep the decks!" As soon as these words entered his ears, he felt an indescribable comfort in his heart; compared to the 'Namo Amitabha Buddha' that he heard all the times in Shaolin Temple, it was like comparing the Western Pure Land of Ultimate Bliss with the eighteen layers of hell.

He quickly went to the door and stretched out his hand to push it. A man in his forties, wearing a hat at a crooked angle, came out, and looked at him with squinted eyes. "What do you want?" he asked.

From his pocket Wei Xiaobao took out an ingot of silver and tossed it back and forth from one hand to the other, and said with a laugh, "My hands itch, I want to lose a few taels."

"This is not a casino, it's a brothel," the man said, "Xiao Xiongdi, you want to visit a prostitute, come back in several years."

Wei Xiaobao had been craving for some gambling for a long time, as soon as he heard the words 'pair of earth, heavenly nine king, sweep the decks', even if the sky was falling, he simply must bet. What's more, coming to a brothel was just like coming home; how could he be willing to leave? He laughed and said, "Just find me several free ladies and prepare some tea, tonight Shaoye [young master] wants to have three tables of drinking party." And he stuffed the silver ingot worth two taels into the man's hand and said with a laugh, "To buy you a drink."

The turtle slave[1] was greatly delighted; seeing the visitor was a grand customer, immediately his face was blooming with smile. "Thank you for Shaoye's gift!" he said. Raising his voice, he called out, "We have visitor!" while respectfully invited him to enter.

The female brothel keeper came out to greet him. Seeing it was a fourteen, fifteen years old teenager with luxurious clothing, she thought, "This kid stole money from his home and come here to squander it; must rip him off heavily." With a giggle she pulled his hand and said, "Xiao Shaoye, we have a rule here, just like the lucky poster on the door[2]. You want to see a girl, you must pay up front."

With a wooden expression Wei Xiaobao said, "Do you think I am a newly hatched bird who has never visited a brothel before? We are the experts here, Laozi opens this kind of establishment at home." He groped his pocket for a pack of banknotes, roughly three, four hundred taels, and slapped it onto the table. He said, "A table of tea five qian, including one girl. A 'flower head' is three taels, the servant who pours tea five qian, the Auntie five qian. Laozi is in a very good mood today, I'll double everything."

A succession of brothel shoptalk without half a word of layman term had caught the procuress off-guard; she was stunned and stared blankly for half a day before finally she laughed and said, "Turns out Xiao Shaoye is of the same profession, I was mistaken. I wonder which courtyards does Xiao Shaoye open?"

Wei Xiaobao said, "In Yangzhou Laozi opens Li Chun Yuan [Lovely Spring Courtyard] and Yi Qing Yuan [Harmony Passion Courtyard], in Beijing I open Shang Xin Lou [Bountiful Heart Balcony, 'lou' - multi-storied house] and Chang Chun Ge [Carefree Spring Pavilion], in Tianjin I open Rou Qing Yuan [Tender Feeling Courtyard] and Wen Ju Lou [Yearning for Chrysanthemum Balcony]; six affiliates." Actually these six establishments were Yangzhou's famous brothels, otherwise, he would not be able to fabricate six brothels' names in such a short period of time.

Listening to him, the procuress thought, 'Oh my goodness, the big boss of six courtyard affiliates is here; his business must be very big.' Thereupon she laughed and asked, "What kind of girl would Xiao Shaoye like to accompany you to have a heart-to-heart talk?"

Wei Xiaobao said, "I suppose a little place like this won't have a Suzhou girl. Do you have any Datong [prefecture level city, Shanxi] girl?"

The procuress' face showed an awkward expression as she said in a low voice, "We do have one, but she is fake goods; actually she is a Shanxi Fenyang [county level city, Luliang prefecture, Shanxi] girl, she can only fool someone with more money than sense, but not a connoisseur."

Wei Xiaobao laughed and said, "Just call all the girls in the courtyard, Shaoye will reward everybody three taels each."

The procuress was greatly delighted; she passed on the order for all the girls to come. In an instant the room was crammed with twittering and squawking girls. In this little town brothel, naturally the girls had rough hands and thick feet, with faces adorned with coarse rouge powder. Each one pulled his hand or embraced his waist; everybody was doing her utmost to curry his favor. Wei Xiaobao was really happy. Although these prostitutes had thick eyebrows, high cheekbones or mouths as big as sacrificial bowl, which were practically several points more ugly than himself, but since he was little, he was determined to be the rich man and show extravagance in the brothel. Today his life-long dream had come true, hence he was immensely proud of himself. Pulling the prostitute by his side, he planted a kiss on her lips, and was assaulted by a flourishing stench of green onion and garlic that he almost threw up.

Suddenly the door curtain was lifted up, two women walked in. "Alright!" Wei Xiaobao shouted with glee, "Two more Meizi come together. Come here and give me a kiss first ..." Before he finished, he had seen clearly the appearance of these two girls, and could not help but was greatly shocked.

He cried out, sprang up, and overthrew the two prostitutes in his arms to the ground. Turned out these two women were the girl in green, whom he thought of during the night and he missed during the night, and her older martial sister.

With a cold laugh the woman in blue said, "As soon as you entered the town, we have been following you, we want to see what evil deed you are going to commit."

Wei Xiaobao's back was wet with cold sweat; forcing a laugh he said, "Yes, yes. This Miss, your ... your neck's wound ... neck's wound healed?"

"Humph," the girl in green snorted, but she ignored his question. The woman in blue angrily said, "We waited outside Shaolin Temple every day, to cut your body into ten thousand pieces to repay my Shimei's deep enmity and great hatred. Humph, finally the Heaven did not disappoint those who try, and have you, evil monk, fallen into our hands."

Wei Xiaobao groaned inwardly, "Laozi will definitely return to Heaven today." But he laughed and said, "Actually ... actually I did not offend ... did not offend Miss; it's just that ... it's just that one grab was not a big deal. I think ... I think ..."

The girl in green blushed, a killing aura appeared in her eyes. The woman in blue coldly said, "What did you say a moment ago? What did you call us?"

"Bad, it's really bad luck," Wei Xiaobao replied, "I ... thought the two of you were ... were also flower ladies of this pleasure house."

The girl in green said in a low voice, "Shijie, why do you talk too much to this bald-headed thief who committed all kinds of evil things? Just kill him with a chop."

'Shua!' white light flashed, Wei Xiaobao screamed and shrank his neck, the hat on his head was slashed by her willow-leaf saber, exposing his bald head. The prostitutes were thrown into confusion, they screamed, "Murder, murder!"

Wei Xiaobao ducked and hid behind a prostitute. "Hey!" he called out, "This is a pleasure house, only wh0res are allowed here. If you do not get out quickly and people knew about it, it would be ... would be very shameful ..."

'Shua, shua!' the two women repeatedly slashed around, but the room was crowded with a dozen or so prostitutes, how could they chop him? The blades swept past, they narrowly missed two prostitutes. Wei Xiaobao called out loudly, "Laozi is visiting a brothel, what's there to be looked at? I ... I am going to undress, I am going to take off my pants." He loosened the bottom part of his garments and tossed it away.

The two women were furious, yet they were afraid Wei Xiaobao would really act shamelessly by taking off his pants. The girl in green turned around and bolted out the door. The girl in blue was startled, but she also dashed out of the room. 'Bang, bang!' she bumped the procuress and the 'turtle slave' [see my note earlier] who came in to look, and sent them tumbling down to the left and right.

In that instant the screams in that brothel shook the sky, and the curses moved the earth. For the time being Wei Xiaobao escaped the danger of the blades, but he knew those two women would definitely guard the exits; as soon as he left the brothel for even one step, they would immediately kill him. Raising his voice, he shouted, "Everybody, don't move randomly, everyone will get ten taels, no exception, nobody will be skipped." As soon as they heard it, everybody calmed down immediately.

Wei Xiaobao took out twenty taels and handed it over to the turtle slave, ordering him, "Quickly go and get me a horse, wait at the mouth of the alley." The turtle slave received the money and left.

Wei Xiaobao pointed to a prostitute and said, "I'll give you twenty taels, take off your clothes quickly, let me change into it." The prostitute was greatly delighted, she took off her clothes immediately.

Everybody started to talk at once, they wanted to know what was going on. Wei Xiaobao said, "Those two are my first wife, my second wife. They shaved my head, forbidding me from visiting a brothel. I ran away, then they pursue me to kill me."

When the procuress and the prostitutes heard this, they could not help but were delighted. It was quite common for the wife and children of a patron to come to the brothel to quarrel and fight; nothing special about it. But raising a saber to kill was a rarity. As for the wife and concubine working together to shave their husband's head and forbidding him from visiting a brothel, it was the first time that they ever heard such thing.

Wei Xiaobao hurriedly changed into the prostitute's clothing, and used a piece of printed cloth to wrap his head. When the prostitute realized that he wanted to dress up to escape, laughing and giggling, they helped him apply rouge and face powder. When the other patrons of the brothel who were gambling heard the news, they all came over to watch the fun.

---

[1] This is literal translation. FYI, 'turtle' in Chinese can also mean 'son of a b1tch' or 'b@stard'.

[2] Referring to poster, envelope, etc. made of red paper, used especially at Chinese Ney Year.

[foxs]

Soon the turtle slave returned and reported that the horse was ready. After knowing the reason, he said, "Shaoye, you must be careful. Your first madam is guarding the back door, the young madam is guarding the front door. They both have sabers in their hands."

Wei Xiaobao produced a large sum of money while swearing, "Those two vixens maintain such a tight control over their husband; it's really rare and highly unusual."

Receiving thirty taels gift from him, the procuress said, "Those two tigresses are destroying others' clothes and food. If all women in the world are like your two wives, won't we drink the northwest wind? May Er Lang Shen[1] curse those two tigresses that they be without a son or a grandson. Aiyo, Xiao Shaoye, I did not mean you. You'd better divorce those tigresses and then you can come here to play without any care every day."

Wei Xiaobao laughed and said, "That is actually a brilliant idea. Mama, go to the front door and curse that vixen for a while; but you'd better hide behind the door to protect against her resorting to violence and harming you with the saber. Sisters, everybody dash out from the back door. Those two brutish wives of mine won’t be able to catch me.” Immediately he took out some money and distributed it among the prostitutes. Without exception, all of them jumped for joy.

Because of the generous reward, those who were inherently brave would be braver, while those who were not brave gathered enough courage. As the prostitutes received the shining white silver, everybody suddenly put ‘loyalty’ above everything else, they would strife to put their lives at stake.

They heard the voice of the procuress raining curses from the front door, “Old vixen, little vixen, if you want to keep your husband, you must obey him, winning his favor is the right thing to do. If you don’t have any ability, he will go to the brothel to seek pleasure. You use the saber to scare him, to kill him, what’s the farting use? Your husband is kind-hearted and generous, he is the number one good person in the world, you, two tigresses are not his match. Let Laoniang [old lady, referring to self; the counterpart of Laozi] tell you: you must behave, quickly kowtow and apologize to him, and then do obeisance to me, let Laoniang be your master, I’ll teach you skills you can use in bed, so that you can serve him well. Otherwise, he might decide to sell you to Laoniang, let you become prostitutes in here. We’ll make a deal today … aiyo, aiyo, it hurts so much I am going to die.”

Wei Xiaobao knew that the woman in blue had lost her patience and beat the procuress. He said, “Everybody, let’s go!” More than twenty prostitutes rushed out from the back door, with Wei Xiaobao mingled among them.

The girl in green was guarding the back door with willow-leaf saber in her hand. Suddenly she saw more than twenty heavily made-up women burst out of the door. Her beautiful eyes widened, she was completely at a loss.

The crowd of prostitutes rushed toward the alley. Wei Xiaobao jumped onto the horse and galloped toward Shaolin Temple.

Seeing the change of events, the woman in blue abandoned the procuress immediately and turned around to give chase. The prostitutes crowded the alley, they reached out to pull her, while shouting, “Tigress, your husband is gone riding a horse, you won’t catch him! Hee! Hee! Ha! Ha!”

The girl in blue was so furious that she almost pass out; she raised her saber in threatening gesture, but the crowd of prostitutes knew she would not dare to really kill anybody. “Lowly vixen, vinegar pot, wicked b1tch,” they taunted incessantly.

The girl was anxious; raising her voice, she called out, “Shimei, that wicked thief ran away, quickly pursue him!” But she heard the hooves beat was getting farther and farther away; how could they pursue him?

Wei Xiaobao rushed out of the town, while taking off the female clothing he was wearing and tossed it away one by one. In his rush and panic to get out of the brothel, he had left the bundle containing his monk robe in the room. Spitting into his sleeve, he wiped the cosmetics from his face, thinking, “Laozi’s lot on life this year is really bad; first I became a monk, then I dressed up as a prostitute. Ay, if only that miss in green is willing to be my wife, even if my head is chopped down, I won’t want to go to the brothel.”

In one breath he galloped back to Shaolin Temple; he steered the horse toward the back of the mountain, jumped down the horseback, and quietly sneaked into the Temple via the side door. Covering his face, he dashed madly into his own meditation room. Only after washing off the rouge and the powder from his face, and putting on the monk robe, did his heart finally calmed down. He mused, “If those two old wife and little wife came to the Temple to make trouble, even if I die, Laozi will not admit anything to them.”

Toward the afternoon the next day, Wei Xiaobao was still lying on the bed in his meditation room, dreaming about the girl in green’s figure, which moved his heart; he could not bear not to take chances again, thinking, “How can I find a way to see her again?”

Suddenly Jing Ji entered his meditation room and said in a low voice, “Shishuzu, for the next few days you must not leave the Temple; this affair is getting somewhat worse.”

Wei Xiaobao was startled; hastily he asked for the full details. Jing Ji said, “A worker from the Xiang Ji kitchen told me just now: he was chopping some firewood at the side of the mountain when he came across two young women with sabers in their hands; they were inquiring about you.”

“What did they ask?” Wei Xiaobao asked.

“They asked him if he knew you,” Jing Ji replied, “They asked him what time do you usually go out, where do you usually go. Shishuzu, those two young women harbor evil designs toward you, they are guarding outside the Temple, they want to harm you. As long as you stay inside the Temple, they won’t dare to come in.”

Wei Xiaobao said, “We, Shaolin Temple eminent monks, are afraid of them and do not dare to go out the Temple, what kind of talk is that?”

“Shizhisun [martial grandnephew] has already reported this to Fangzhang,” Jing Ji said, “The Senior ordered me to report to Shishuzu, asking you to yield one step to them. Presumably those two young women will not persevere, if they don’t see you after waiting for several days, naturally they will leave. Fangzhang said that Wulin friends can only say that we are great and magnanimous people, they cannot possibly say that the grand Shaolin Temple is unexpectedly afraid of two young women that don’t belong to any school or sect.”

Wei Xiaobao said, "Young women that don’t belong to any school or sect, humph, they may be much more formidable than us, the great monks who belong to a school or sect."

"Who said it wasn't true?" Jing Ji replied. He remembered his hatred because of his broken arm, which would be difficult to avenge. He said, "It's just that Fangzhang has ordered that no matter what we must keep the peace and patch up a quarrel."

After Jing Ji left, Wei Xiaobao thought, "I'd better see that old monk Cheng Guan; it would be best if he has come up with a wonderful idea."

When he got to Bo're Hall, he saw Cheng Guan with his head between his hands, his eyes were looking at the beam of the roof, while pacing back and forth around the room, and mumbling incessantly. Wei Xiaobao did not dare to interrupt his train of thought, he waited for a long time, watching Cheng Guan circling the room several times, while still looking like he did not see him. Wei Xiaobao coughed several times. Cheng Guan did not pay any attention. Wei Xiaobao called, "Lao Shizhi [old martial nephew], Lao Shizhi!" Cheng Guan still did not hear.

Wei Xiaobao stepped forward, he reached out to tap Cheng Guan's shoulder, while saying with a laugh, "Lao ..." His palm had just touched his shoulder, suddenly his body was jolted and he was thrown away. 'Bang!' he crashed onto the wall, his breathing was blocked, he opened his mouth to cry, but nothing came out.

Cheng Guan was shocked; hastily he came forward and kneeled down. Putting his palms together he saluted and said, "Shizhi is guilty, deserving ten thousand deaths, by offending Shishu. Shishu, please punish me heavily."

After lying down for half a day, Wei Xiaobao was finally able to breathe; he forced a laugh and said, "Please get up, please get up, don't be overly courteous, it was my own fault."

Cheng Guan still did not stop apologizing. Propping himself against the wall, Wei Xiaobao crawled up, and then, helping Cheng Guan up he asked, "What kind of martial art was that? It was so formidable." He thought, "If this martial art is not too difficult to learn, perhaps there is a benefit for me to learn it."

Cheng Guan's face showed a terrified expression. He said, "I am really sorry. In response to Shishu's question, this is the 'hu ti shen gong' [divine skill to protect the body] from Bo're Palms."

Wei Xiaobao nodded; he thought that to learn this skill, he would have to master some Shaolin Long Fist, Luohan Fist, Subduing the Tiger Fist, Weituo Palm, Scattering Flower Hand, Boluomi Hand, Vajra's Divine Palm, Picking Flower Grab and Capture, all kinds of gibberish set of martial art techniques. He did not have time; even if he did, he would not have the mind to take the trouble to practice hard. He asked, "Have you found anything that can be learned in a short time?"

With a dejected expression Cheng Guan shook his head and said, "Shizhi has already thought that without using 'one finger Dhyana' or ‘tendon altering sutra’ internal energy cultivation, we can neutralize those two Nu Shizhu's martial art by using only the Bo're Palm; it's just that ... it's just that ..."

Wei Xiaobao said, "It's just that to train Bo're Palm, I will need twenty, thirty years; isn't it?"

Cheng Guan haltingly replied, "Twenty, thirty years, I am afraid ... I am afraid ..."

Wei Xiaobao's face showed contempt as he flatly said, "You are afraid it might not be enough?"

Cheng Guan looked very ashamed as he said, "Exactly." After staring blankly for a moment, he continued, "Let Shizhi think: I wonder if Picking Flower Grab and Capture will be effective against them."

Wei Xiaobao thought that this old monk was one who rigidly adheres to formalities; whatever he was doing must be in sequence. Even if the Picking Flower Grab and Capture was effective, he would have to spend at least a dozen or so years to train. This old monk had a profound level of internal energy, perhaps he was not inferior to Cult Leader Hong. Yet Cult Leader Hong was able to casually creating new moves, which were able to change according to the situation, which were free, natural and unrestrained. This old monk, on the contrary, was a blockhead; Wei Xiaobao must show him the enlightened path.

"Lao Shizhi," he said, "In my opinion, those two women are very young, they can't possibly have several years of martial art training."

"That's right," Cheng Guan said, "That's why I feel very strange."

Wei Xiaobao said, "Since they can't possibly train step by step, we also do not need to strictly practice step by step. I don't believe they have internal energy cultivation as deep as yours. In my opinion, to deal with those two girls, we simply do not need to cultivate internal energy."

Cheng Guan was shocked; his voice was trembling as he said, "Training martial art without ... without good foundation, won't that be ... won't that be heretical?"

"But they are not heretical," Wei Xiaobao said, "Only without school without sect. To deal with martial art without school and without sect, we must also use without school without sect technique."

Cheng Guan was completely bewildered; he mumbled to himself, "Without school without sect, without school without sect? This ... Shizhi does not understand."

Wei Xiaobao laughed and said, "You don't understand? Then let me teach you."

Cheng Guan respectfully said, "Would Shishu please give your advice?"

In all his life, all the martial art uncles with a 'Hui' character in their names were virtuous eminent monks with outstanding martial art skill. He thought that this little martial art uncle was very young, his internal energy cultivation was insufficient, but he must have some outstanding quality; otherwise, how could he be his martial art uncle? For the past several days he had racked his brain trying to find a martial art skill that can be learned quickly, but all along he did not make any breakthrough. It seemed that even if he spent another ten years or twenty years, even until his death, he would not be able to solve this problem. Now that there was this young eminent monk with 'Hui' character in his name who was willing to give him direction, inevitably he was surprised but delighted at the same time; feeling of respect sprang up automatically in his heart.

Wei Xiaobao said, "You said that those two girls were using some Kunlun Pai, Emei Pai moves. If we compare our Shaolin Pai martial art to these random mix of school and sect's martial arts, which one is stronger?"

"Perhaps our Shaolin Pai is somewhat stronger," Cheng Guan replied, "Even if we are not stronger, at least we are not weaker than they."

Wei Xiaobao clapped his hands and said, "That makes it easy. They do not use internal energy, but only use some Xili Hulu [meaning: gibberish] Pai style; we do not need internal energy either, just use some Shaolin Pai style, then we will be able to defeat them. I don't care if it is Bo're Palm, Vajra's Divine Fist, Boluomi Hand or Amitabha Buddha Foot, as long as internal energy cultivation is not needed, then it will be very easy to learn, won't it?"

Cheng Guan knitted his brows. "Amitabha Buddha Foot?" he said, "I don't think our Sect has that martial art; I wonder if it is other sect's martial art? But without internal energy cultivation, our Sect's fist or palm techniques won't have the least bit of formidable power; if we came across other sect's martial art expert with profound internal power, we might get our tendon broken and our bones fractured in just one move."

Wei Xiaobao laughed aloud and said, "Those two young women, are they martial art experts with profound internal power?"

"They are not," Cheng Guan replied.

"Why worry, then?" Wei Xiaobao said.

It was as if Cheng Guan had just been woken up by this last sentence; he blew off a deep sigh and said, "So that's how it is, so that's how it is! Shizhi has never thought about it." He was quiet for a moment before continuing, "But there is another problem: our Sect's has eighteen different palm techniques, special skills, inside and outside, thirty-six techniques, unique skills, seventy-two. Each technique has at least several dozen variations, at most more than a thousand. It's really not easy to master all of these different techniques to perfection. Even without internal energy cultivation, that is, learning the style only, we are talking about several decades here."

Wei Xiaobao mused, "This old monk is really annoyingly dumb." He laughed and said, "Why do we have to master everything to perfection? As long as we know the girl uses what style, we'll simply counter soldiers with arms, counter water with an earthen wall; the young girl attack with what move, the old monk neutralize her with what move. I guarantee they will be beaten so badly that they'll flee to the wilderness and will be wiped out to the last man."

Cheng Guan repeatedly nodded his head with a happy expression on his face, as if murky darkness was suddenly opened.

Wei Xiaobao said, "That Miss wearing blue has used some Laoshan Pai's 'rivers pour away by the day'; you said there are six ways to dodge it, seven ways to counterattack. Actually, why bother with all those stuffs? As long as I can use one move to defeat her, why should I learn the other twelve techniques? Won't it be a lot simpler?"

Cheng Guan was greatly delighted. "Absolutely right! Absolutely right!" he exclaimed, "Those two Nu Shizhu has broken Shishu's arms and injured martial nephew Jing Ji and the others, four people, using the ‘separating tendon dislocating bone technique’ involving four different sects' techniques. We can use Shaolin Pai martial art to counter their move." Immediately he demonstrated the technique used by the girls one by one, and then he explained the technique to counter each move, followed by demonstrating it for Wei Xiaobao.

Sometimes the technique proposed by Cheng Guan was too complicated and too difficult to learn; sometimes unwittingly he used internal energy. Wei Xiaobao would then ask him to think about other technique that was simple and clear. Shaolin Pai martial art was indeed very broad and greatly abundant, while Cheng Guan was really patience. As soon as Wei Xiaobao felt that the move was too hard to learn, he simply shook his head, and then Cheng Guan would try different technique. If it did not work, he would try a different move, until Wei Xiaobao was able to execute the move effortlessly.

Seeing in less than an hour this young martial uncle was able to master a particular style, while he himself had painstakingly spent many days to solve the problem, Cheng Guan was so happy that he pulled his own ear and stroked his own cheek, while his heart was unbearably excited. But suddenly he remembered something and said, "What a pity, what a pity." And then he shook his head and said, "Dangerous, dangerous."

Wei Xiaobao hastily asked, "What do you mean 'what a pity'? What's the danger?"

---

[1] Er Lang Shen is a Chinese God with a third truth-seeing eye in the middle of his forehead.

[foxs]

Chapter 23 - Scholars with innate talent have a lot of hobbies, the Lord made pictures to convey a message.
(Translated by Foxs)

LuDingJi-23.jpg

Carrying the secret edict, Wei Xiaobao went to Hui Cong’s meditation room and said, “Fangzhang Shixiong, His Majesty has a secret order for me, I am asking you to give me directions.” Breaking the secret edict’s seal, he saw a large sheet of fine writing paper. Upon spreading it out, he saw four drawings.

[foxs]

Cheng Guan said, "If I want Shishu [martial uncle], the Senior and Jing Ji and the others, four people to go out and fight those two Nu Shizhu [female benefactor], to have them break your hands and feet. If they break your limbs really bad and cannot be cured easily, you will be crippled for life; won’t that be a pity? Moreover, if the two Nu Shizhu are too ruthless and unexpectedly kill the five of you, won’t that be dangerous?”

Wei Xiaobao was puzzled, “Why would you want us, five people, to fight?” he asked.

Cheng Guan said, “I am sure these are not the only move those two Nu Shizhu learned. Shizhi [martial nephew] does not know what other moves they have, naturally I cannot devise a technique to counter them. If the five of you do not go up to take a beating to test their moves, how can I investigate and find out?”

Wei Xiaobao roared in laughter. “So that’s how it is,” he said, “I have an idea: as long as you can fight with them, it won’t be a pity, and there won’t be any danger.”

Cheng Guan’s expression became awkward. “Those who left homes must not get angry,” he said, “We must not fight other people without rhyme or reason; that would be greatly inappropriate.”

“I got it!” Wei Xiaobao said, “The two of us can go out the Temple to take a walk. If the two Nu Shizhu have already gone far away, nothing could be better than that. This is called ‘if you don’t offend me, I won’t offend you’. Whatever other moves they might have, we don’t have to pay them any more attention.”

“Absolutely right, absolutely right!” Cheng Guan said, “But Shizhi has never gone out the Temple gate. As soon as go out deliberately creating trouble seems to be ill-will. When my master first taught me Buddhist teaching at the Luye Garden, he taught me about the Four Noble Truths and Eight-fold Noble Way. This ‘righteous intention’ is one of Eight-fold Noble Way …”

“We don’t need to go far,” Wei Xiaobao cut his discourse, “Just take a stroll around the Temple. It would be best if we do not meet them at all.”

“Exactly, exactly,” Cheng Guan said, “Shishu has a virtuous heart, unwilling to strife and struggle against other people, it could be considered ‘righteous intention’. Shizhi definitely must follow your example.”

Wei Xiaobao was secretly amused, taking along his hand, he went out Shaolin Temple via the side door. Cheng Guan had never seen even the forest by the Temple; seeing a vast stretch of pine trees, he could not help but clucking his tongue in amazement as he praised, “Those many pine trees grow together, it’s quite a spectacle. In our Bo’re Hall courtyard there are only two …”

Before he could finish, suddenly they heard female voice from behind, “The little bald thief is here!” Followed by a flash of white ray, a steel saber chopped down on Wei Xiaobao.
Cheng Guan said, “This is the Fierce Tiger Descends the Mountain from Five Tiger Breaking Gate’s Saber Technique.” Reaching out, he grabbed the saber using ‘grabbing blade from someone’ technique, but then he suddenly recalled that the move he used was from the ‘Picking Flower Grab and Capture’; which was too difficult to learn. “It won’t do!” he said, and hastily pulled his hand back.

The ‘one using the blade’ was precisely the woman in blue; seeing Cheng Guan withdrew his hand, she swiftly flipped her willow-leaf saber and swept toward his waist. Right this moment, the girl in green dashed out from among the pine trees and brandished her saber to chop Wei Xiaobao. Wei Xiaobao hastily dodged and hid behind Cheng Guan, thereupon the girl in green’s saber chopped down on Cheng Guan’s shoulder.

“This is Taiji Saber move,” Cheng Guan said, “There is no simple and easy way to neutralize it …” Before he finished speaking, the two women’s sabers attacked him together, the sabers swung faster and faster, Cheng Guan shouted, “Shishu, it won’t do, it won’t do! The two Nu Shizhu are moving too fast, I can’t … I can’t think fast enough. Please … please ask the two Nu Shizhu not to be impatient, ask them to chop slowly.”

The girl in blue sent out several ruthless moves in succession, but all along she failed to chop the old monk, several times she almost had her saber snatched away by him. Hearing him making such a big fuss, she thought he was deliberately mocking her. In her fury, she chopped even more violently.

Wei Xiaobao laughed and said, “Hey Miss, my Shizhi is asking you not to be impatient, to execute your moves slowly.”

“Exactly,” Cheng Guan said, “My brain is not that quick, I can’t think of this many ways of neutralizing your moves in such a short period of time.”

The girl in green hated Wei Xiaobao to the bones; after several times trying to chop Cheng Guan to no avail, she swung her saber onto Wei Xiaobao. Cheng Guan stretched out his hand to block, while saying, “This Nu Shizhu, my Shishu has not learned the technique to neutralize this saber move of yours; don’t chop him now, wait until he has learned it and know how to block your move. It won’t be too late for you to chop him again. Ay, my moves won’t work. Shishu, forget everything you see, the moves I am using right now are quite useless. After we’re back, we will slowly think it over again.” While his mouth was prattling incessantly, his hands did not stop grabbing and snatching, poking and striking, tightly entangling the two girls; how could the girl in green kill Wei Xiaobao?

Seeing he was out of danger, Wei Xiaobao giggled happily as he leaned against a tree to watch the fight. His eyes feasted on the girl in green’s face, body, hands, feet, and then back to her face again; he looked very satisfied and extremely happy.

When the girl in green did not see Wei Xiaobao anymore, she thought he had run away; when she found out that he was watching her closely, her face blushed. Without giving any thought to Cheng Guan, she turned around with raised saber and rushed toward Wei Xiaobao. Who would have thought that right this moment, Cheng Guan was aiming his finger toward her flank? He intentionally moved his finger slowly; she could have been able to evade it, but in her excitement to kill Wei Xiaobao, she was hit by the finger and fell down to the ground with a shriek.

“Aiyo!” Cheng Guan hastily said, “I am so sorry. The finger power behind Lao Seng’s [old monk] move, ‘laughing finger southern sky’, was not too formidable, Nu Shizhu must use one move from the Five Tiger Breaking Gate’s Saber called ‘vicious tiger blocking the road’. By slanting your saber slightly, you could have parried it. Although Nu Shizhu had not used this move, but that Nu Shizhu in blue had used it; Lao Seng thought that Nu Shizhu must also know how to use it; who would have thought … Ay, I have committed an offense, I have committed an offense.”

The girl in blue was fuming mad; her steel saber swept horizontally, swiftly and fiercely, but her martial art skill was much too inferior to Cheng Guan’s, all along she was unable to even touch the corner of his monk robe. Cheng Guan’s mouth was mumbling nonstop, he was trying to memorize all her moves. Since he was unable to find a simple and easy way to break her stances on the spot, he had no choice but to understand clearly her saber techniques, so that he could consider it in detail later.

Wei Xiaobao went toward the girl in green; he praised, “This kind of good-looking little beauty, throughout the world there’s only you, one person, tsk, tsk, tsk! Just by looking at you my soul is flying up to the sky.” Stretching out his hand, he lightly caressed her face.

The girl was shocked and angered, her breath failed to flow, she fainted immediately. Wei Xiaobao was startled; he no longer dared to be frivolous and reckless. Standing up, he called out, “Cheng Guan Shizhi, seal that Nu Shizhu’s acupoint as well; we’ll have her explain her moves slowly later, so that we won’t harm our friendship.”

Cheng Guan hesitated. “Don’t you think it will be rather bad?” he asked.

Wei Xiaobao replied, “By exchanging blows and kicks right now, it is already too unsightly. Asking her to talk is fairly more refined and in good taste.”

Cheng Guan was delighted. “Shishu is right, exchanging blows and kicks is not the ‘just way’.”

The girl in blue knew that as soon as this old monk went all-out, she would not be able to withstand even his single move or half a style. Right now her martial sister was captured; if she also fell into his hands, nobody would report their capture and ask for help. Thereupon she leaped back and called out, “If you harm a single strand of my Shimei’s hair, I will burn your Shaolin Temple to the ground.”

Cheng Guan was startled. “How can we dare to injure this Nu Shizhu?” he asked, “If she sheds a single strand of her own hair, are you going to set our temple on fire?”

The girl in blue had already rushed several steps; she turned her head around and cursed, “Old bald thief is oily-mouthed and smooth talking, little bald thief …” She was going to say ‘obscene, heretic and lecherous’, but felt it was inappropriate to say those four words. Stomping her foot, she disappeared into the forest.

Wei Xiaobao gazed on the girl in green lying on the ground, her white jade-like tender face on the green grass, her white jade-like pair of hands truly looked like the white jade image of Guanyin sitting on an emerald pedestal; he could not help but staring blankly at her.

Cheng Guan said, “Nu Shizhu, your Shijie [older martial sister] has left. You’d better go as well, don’t let a single strand of your hair falls, otherwise, your Shijie will come and burn our Temple.”

Wei Xiaobao thought, “Good opportunity must not be missed. Since this little beauty has fallen into my hands, whatever happens, I must not let her go.” Putting his palms together he said, “This is our Buddha’s blessing. Cheng Guan Shizhi, our Buddha wants you to expand Shaolin’s martial art study, to uphold our Pai’s thousand-plus years of martial prestige; you are indeed our Pai’s greatest contributor of meritorious service.”

Cheng Guan was puzzled, “Shishu, what are you talking about?”

Wei Xiaobao said, “We were concerned over what other moves those two Nu Shizhu might have. It is very fortunate that our Buddha has pity on us, by sending this Nu Shizhu to honor our Temple with her presence, so that she can explain everything one by one.” Finished speaking, he bent down to carry the girl and said, “Let’s go home.”

Cheng Guan was astonished and puzzled; he only felt that there was something greatly amiss in this matter, but what exactly was wrong, he could not tell. After a while he said, “Shishu, inviting this Nu Shizhu inside the Temple does not seem to follow the rule.”

“What do you mean not following the rule?” Wei Xiaobao asked, “Hasn’t she been in the Temple before? Fangzhang [Abbot] and Jielu Courtyard Head both said nothing was wrong, clearly it was in accordance with the rule, wasn’t it?”

The more he talked, the lower Cheng Guan hung his head; he only felt that each sentence cannot be disputed. He saw the little martial uncle took off his monk robe and wrapped it around the girl’s body, and carried her into the Temple via a side door. Cheng Guan had no choice but to follow behind him. He looked lost, his brain was in confusion.

Wei Xiaobao’s heart was pounding; although from head to toe the girl was covered by the monk robe and nothing was visible from the outside, but if any monk in the Temple saw them, unavoidably they would raise some suspicion. He was carrying a warm, fragrant, and tender jade, in his bosom, but in his heart he was afraid. Fortunately, Bo’re Hall was located in a secluded area at the back of the Temple; while he was hurrying toward the Hall, they did not meet any other monk.

When he entered the Hall, the monks on duty saw their grand-martial uncle personal visit, with their chief following behind him, they all stepped aside respectfully to let them pass. By the time they entered Cheng Guan’s meditation room, the girl had not regained her consciousness. Wei Xiaobao put her down on the couch. His hands were wet with cold sweats, he wiped his palms on the side of his legs and heaved a deep sigh. “There!” he said with a laugh.

“We are going to invite this … this Nu Shizhu to stay in here?” Cheng Guan asked.

“That’s right,” Wei Xiaobao replied, “This is not the first time she stays in the Temple. Previously, when her neck was injured, didn’t she stay at the Eastern Courtyard?”

Cheng Guan nodded. “Yes,” he said, “But … but that time it was to treat her injury, it was a matter of life and death; we did not have any choice but temporarily taking care of her.”

“That’s very easy,” Wei Xiaobao said. Pulling the dagger from his boot, he said, “I only need to ruthlessly cut her once, so that her life will be in danger, and then we won’t have any choice but temporarily take care of her.” Finished speaking, he stepped toward her and raised his hand, poised to make a cut.

“No, no,” Cheng Guan hastily said, “That … that won’t be necessary.”

“Alright,” Wei Xiaobao said, “I will listen to you then. But you must not let anybody know. After she finishes explaining all kinds of moves and styles, we will quietly escort her out. Otherwise, I have no choice but to slash her.”

“Yes, yes,” Cheng Guan said, “I won’t say anything.” He only felt that this young martial uncle’s conduct was really strange; but recalling that he was his superior from the ‘Hui’ character generation, his knowledge and experience must be superior to his own. Listening to his order, he did not have the slightest inclination to question it.

“This Nu Shizhu’s temperament is strong,” Wei Xiaobao said, “She is determined to snatch the Bo’re Hall Chief position from you, I must advise her well.”

Cheng Guan said, “If she insists, Shizhi will let her have it, and that’s the end.”

Wei Xiaobao was taken aback; he did not expect this old monk to have a very simple character, without any desire to compete at all. “She is not a monk of our Temple,” he said, “If she took over the Bo’re Hall leadership, where would we put our Shaolin Temple’s face? If you harbor that kind of mindset, you are letting down Shaolin Pai.” While saying that, his expression was grim, so that even Cheng Guan was also scared into thinking that that was the truth.

“That’s right,” Wei Xiaobao said with wooden expression, “Get out now, wait for me outside, I must persuade her.” Cheng Guan bowed to comply, walked out of the meditation room, and closed the door behind him.

Wei Xiaobao untied the monk robe wrapped around the girl. The girl was about to scream when she saw a dagger, glittering like frost and snow, right in front of her nose. Her mouth was opened wide, but she did not dare to make any noise. Wei Xiaobao giggled and said, “Little Miss, as long as you obediently listen to me, I won’t harm a strand of your hair. Otherwise, I won’t have any choice but to cut your nose before letting you out of the Temple. When one lacks a nose, one can’t smell fragrance or stench, not a big deal, isn’t it?”

The girl was scared and angered at the same time; her face was devoid of any color even more. “Are you going to listen to me?” Wei Xiaobao asked.

The girl was extremely angry. “Quickly kill me,” she said in a low voice.

Wei Xiaobao sighed and said, “You have a countenance of a flower, face like the moon; how could I bear to kill you? Yet if I let you go, from now on day and night I will always miss you, and then I will die from lovesickness; that means I am spoiling the virtue given to me by the Heaven.”

The girl’s face turned red, but immediately turned back to white. Wei Xiaobao said, “There is only one way: I must cut your nose, then your appearance won’t be beautiful anymore, hence I won’t die of lovesickness.”

The girl shut her eyes tight, two drops of clear tear seeped through her long and beautiful eyelashes. Wei Xiaobao’s heart softened; “Don’t cry, don’t cry!” he said consolingly, “As long as you listen to me nicely, I would rather cut my own nose than yours. What’s your name?”

The girl shook her head, more tears flowed from her eyes. Wei Xiaobao said, “Oh, so your name is Yaotou Mao [shaking-head cat]; that’s not a nice name.”

The girl opened her eyes; with a sob she said, “Who’s Yaotou Mao? You are Yaotou Mao.”

Hearing her reply, Wei Xiaobao was ecstatic. “Alright,” he said with a laugh, “I am Yaotou Mao. Who are you, then?”

The girl angrily said, “I won’t tell you!”

Wei Xiaobao said, “Since you don’t want to tell me, I’d better give you a name. How about … how about Yaba Mao [mute cat]?”

“Rubbish!” the girl said, “I am not mute.”

Wei Xiaobao was sitting on a stack of books on Shaolin martial art, crossing his leg on top of the other, and was swaying gently back and forth. Seeing the angry look on her beyond-compare-beautiful face, his heart was excited. He laughed and said, “What is your honorable surname and your great name, then?”

“I said I won’t tell you, I won’t tell you,” the girl replied.

[foxs]

“I have something I’d like to discuss with you,” Wei Xiaobao said, “If you don’t have any surname and have no name, it’s going to be awkward. Since you are unwilling to tell me, I’ll have to give you one. Mmm, what name should I give to you?”

“I don’t want it, I don’t want it, I don’t want it,” the girl repeatedly said.

Wei Xiaobao laughed and said, “I got it! Your name is Wei Menyao[1].”

The girl was startled. “How quaint,” she said, “I am not surnamed Wei.”

Wei Xiaobao grimly said, “Emperor of Heaven above, Empress of Earth below, in all my life I will climb the mountain of sabers, or go down a deep fryer, to be cut into pieces, to be executed along with my whole family unto the third generation, committing heresy and treason, with dozen unpardonable evil crimes, let my sons be robbers, my daughters be prostitutes, let me be without sons without grandsons, beaten by the sky stricken by thunder, my entire body covered with 1001 big and deep boils, I must take you as my wife.”

Listening to him uttering that many heavy oaths in one breath, the girl was dumbfounded. But when suddenly she heard the last sentence, she could not help but blushing deep red. “Pei!” she spat.

Wei Xiaobao said, “I am surnamed Wei, and thus you are already decreed by fate to be surnamed Wei as well. I don’t know your surname, and you always shake your head, thereupon your maiden name is Wei Menyao.”

The girl shut her eyes and angrily said, “There has never been a crazy and unfounded ravings monk like you on the earth. You have left home, yet you want to take … take something … Aren’t you afraid Bodhisattva will punish you, when you die you will enter the eighteenth level of hell?”

Wei Xiaobao put his palms together and threw himself prostrate on the floor. When the girl heard the noise of him kneeling, her curiosity was piqued; she opened her eyes and saw him facing the window, kowtowing several times while saying, "My Tathagata Buddha, the merciful Buddha, Bodhisattva Guanyin, Bodhisattva Manjushri, Bodhisattva Samantabhadra, the Jade Emperor, Four Great Vajrapani, King Yama, the underworld judge, Little Demon Wuchang, please listen to me. I, Wei Xiaobao, simply must take this Miss as my wife. Even if after I die I will enter the eighteenth level of hell, have my tongue pulled out, my skull sawed, will not reincarnate for ten thousand years, it's not a big deal. When I am alive, I don't care about anything, when I am dead, I am not afraid of anything. Taking her as my wife has been decided."

The girl noticed how resolute and decisive he was [orig. 'chop the nail and slice the iron'], without the slightest hint of frivolous attitude; she knew he was not joking. She began to feel afraid and begged, "Please stop, please stop." After a brief pause, she said bitterly, "I don't care if you kill me or beat me every day. I hate you to the death, I will never ... will never comply."

Wei Xiaobao stood up and said, "I don't care if you comply or not, in brief or at length, from now on I will spend the next eighty years with you. Even if you have changed into a 100 year-old woman, if I don't succeed in taking you as my wife, I will not die with my eyes closed."

The girl angrily said, "You have disgraced me like this, there will come a day that you will die in my hands. I am going to kill you first before I'll kill myself."

Wei Xiaobao said, "You can always kill me, but that means you are committing a premeditated murder against your own husband. If I cannot be your husband, I won't die that easily." Speaking to this point, he could not stop his voice from trembling.

Seeing him gnashing his teeth with the blue vein on his forehead stuck out, the girl was scared and closed her eyes again. Wei Xiaobao wanted to take several steps toward her, but his entire body went weak, his hands and feet trembled, suddenly he had a strong urge to kneel down and prostrate himself in front of her, to plead with her sincerely; but as he took another step toward her, his throat emitted a low growling noise like a wounded beast, followed by a desire to strangle her to death.

As the girl heard the strange noise, she opened her eyes and saw the strange gleam on his eyes; she shrieked. Wei Xiaobao was startled; he withdrew several steps and sat down dejectedly, thinking, "In the Imperial Palace I called Miss Fang and Xiao Junzhu my first and second wife. We were laughing hee-hee ha-ha, so relaxed and unrestrained. When I wanted to embrace them I just embraced them, when I wanted to kiss them I simply kiss them. This little girl's acupoint is clearly sealed by the old monk, she is unable to move a single step; how come I do not dare to even caress her hand?"

He saw her beautiful and delicate hand was peeking underneath the monk robe; he only wanted to hold her hand gently, but he did not have any courage to do so, and could not help but swearing, "Hot piece mama!"

The girl did not understand; she stared at him. Wei Xiaobao's face blushed; he said, "I was cursing my own cowardice and uselessness; I wasn't cursing you."

"You disregard the law and natural morality, yet still saying that you are a coward," the girl replied, "If you are truly a coward, I should really thank the Heaven and thank the Earth."

As soon as he heard this, Wei Xiaobao's spirit soared. He stood up and said, "Alright, I want to disregard the law and natural morality. I want to strip you naked." The girl was so shocked that she almost fainted.

Wei Xiaobao walked near her and saw the deep hatred in her eyes; he said in his heart, "Forget it, forget it. I, Wei Xiaobao, am a turtle son of a b1tch. I surrender to you, I don't dare to make a move." In a gentle voice he said, "I have always been afraid of my wife since I was born. I will let you go."

Only now did the girl's fright diminished; but her anger flared up again as she said, "You ... in that town, what kind of rubbish did you tell those ... those bad women? You said my Shijie and I ... are ... are your ... whatever. You said we were going to seize you and take you back. You ... you are an evil man ..."

Wei Xiaobao laughed aloud and said, "What do those bad women understand? Later on, after I take you as my wife, the hundred thousand prostitutes of a thousand brothels in the world lining up in front of me, Wei Xiaobao won't even cast a glance with the corner of my eyes. From morning till night, from night till morning, twelve sichen a day, I will only have eyes for my beloved wife."

The girl said, "If you call me one more time as your ... your ... whatever, I will not speak to you again, ever."

Wei Xiaobao was greatly delighted; he hastily said, "Alright, alright, I won't call you out loud, I will only call you in my heart."

The girl said, "You must not call me in your heart."

Wei Xiaobao smiled and said, "I will secretly call you in my heart, you won't know it."

"Humph," the girl said, "How can I possibly not know? Looking at the weird expression on your face, I know you are calling me in your heart."

Wei Xiaobao said, "When Mama gave birth to me, my expression has already been weird like this. Most likely it was because ever since I was in my mother's womb, I have already known that in the future I am going to marry you as my wife."

The girl shut her eyes and no longer paid attention to him. Wei Xiaobao said, "Hey, I have not called you my wife, how can you ignore me?"

"You haven't?" the girl said, "You lie to my face. You said you were going to marry me as your ... whatever; that was it."

Wei Xiaobao laughed and said, "Alright, I won't say it. I was only saying that in the future I will be your husband ..."

The girl was extremely angry; she shut her eyes as tight as she could. Afterwards, no matter what Wei Xiaobao said to her, whether he was rambling incoherently or teasing her, she did not respond at all.

Wei Xiaobao was at a loss; he wanted to say, "If you ignore me, I am going to kiss your face." But as the word was at the tip of his tongue, he swallowed it back again, thinking that by coercing this fairy-like beauty, he would actually be profaning her. He sighed and said, "I only have one favor to ask you. If you tell me your name and surname, I will let you go."

"You deceived me," the girl said.

"I deceived a lot of people in the world," Wei Xiaobao said, "You are not the only one. This is called being a real man, whatever I say, dead horse cannot chase it. Little wife does not say anything, a live horse can chase it easily."

The girl was startled; "What dead horse cannot chase, a live horse can chase easily?" she asked.

"It's our Shaolin Pai's saying," Wei Xiaobao said, "In short, I am not deceiving you. Just think, I single-mindedly want your grandson to call me yeye [paternal grandfather]; if I deceived you today, your son won't call me Dad, and then where can I get the grandson?"

At first the girl did not understand his rambling about grandson, grandfather, etc. After thinking about it, she understood he was saying the same thing in a roundabout way. She said in a soft voice, "I don't want you to let me go, you have bullied me like this, I have already decided I don't want to live. Just kill me quickly with your blade!"

Wei Xiaobao saw the blade's scar on her neck was still new; a long red scar remained visible. Feeling deep remorse, he kneeled down on the floor, 'Dong! Dong! Dong! Dong!' he knocked his head heavily in front of her. "I have offended Miss!" he said. With both hands he slapped his own cheeks heavily left and right more than a dozen times, his face immediately turned red and swollen. He said, "Miss, please don't be sad; Wei Xiaobao, this son of a b1tch, indeed deserves to be beaten!" Standing up, he opened the door and said, "Hey, Old Shizhi, I want to unseal this Miss' acupoints. How do I do that?"

Cheng Guan had been standing outside the door, waiting. His internal energy was deep, although Wei Xiaobao and the girl were talking in low voices, nothing escaped his ears. He only felt that the way this little martial uncle's 'persuaded' the female benefactor was a profound mystery. All those 'husband, wife, grandson, grandfather' and so on did not seem to have anything to do with martial art, the little martial uncle's wisdom and witticism were too deep to comprehend, his own cultivation in the teachings of Buddha was inadequate so that he failed to understand. Later on he heard the little martial uncle kneeled down and kowtowed, and struck his own cheeks; Cheng Guan could not help but feeling even more admiration.

In Zen Buddhism, when a master passes on the Buddhist doctrines to his disciples, if the disciple did not understand the subtlety of the master's magnificent teaching, the master oftentimes beats the disciple with a stick and shouts at him. Using the stick to pass on the doctrines originated from De Shan Chanshi [Dhyana Master Virtuous Mountain(?)] of the Tang Dynasty; the shout was supposed to urge the person to come to see the truth, it was also originated from a Tang Dynasty dhyana master. The saying 'stick and shout on the head' [i.e. 'severe warning'] came from this custom.

Cheng Guan thought that the eminent monks of the past were using a stick to enlighten people, his little martial uncle was slapping his own face to enlighten the female benefactor. It was an act of abandoning self for others, his heart of mercy surpassed those of his predecessors; he could only admire with gratitude and sigh in admiration. Hearing him asking about how to unseal the acupoints, Cheng Guan hastily replied, "The Nu Shizhu's acupoints being sealed are the 'Da Bao' [large bundle] acupoint belonging to the Foot Taiyin Channel of the Spleen. Shishu only needs to 'push the blood to the palace' (?) of the 'ji men' [winnow basket gate] and 'xue hai' [blood ocean], two acupoints on her leg; that should unseal it."

"'Ji men' and 'xue hai' acupoints, where are they located at?" Wei Xiaobao asked.

Cheng Guan lifted his robe and pointed to the inside of his knee to show him the locations of the acupoints, he let Wei Xiaobao to run his finger on the acupoints to verify that he got the correct ones. He also taught him how to 'push the blood to the palace'; saying, "Shishu has not practiced internal energy, the way you unseal the acupoints will be somewhat slower. But after massaging for about an hour, the acupoints will definitely open." Wei Xiaobao nodded, closed the door, and returned to the couch.

The girl heard the exchange between those two, she cried out in fear, “I don’t want you to unseal my acupoints, I don’t want you to touch me!”

Wei Xiaobao contemplated, “Massaging the inside of her knee for an hour is indeed not too proper. I really want to unseal her acupoint, but she will definitely think that I am being frivolous. Although a husband can be frivolous toward his wife, I still have to follow Heaven’s rule and the Earth’s way; much less this is a good opportunity that I must not lose, if I fail, I will lost her forever. It’s just that this girl’s temper is very fierce; as soon as I unseal her acupoints, I am afraid she would immediately drive me to the wall and kill me. And then Wei Xiaobao indeed won’t have any son and won’t have any grandson.”

Turning his head, he raised his voice and asked, “Men and women should not have direct contact. As people who have left home, we must pay special attention to the rule. If I don’t want to massage her, is there any other technique I can use?”

“Yes,” Cheng Guan said, “Shishu precisely and rigorously abides by the commandments, Shizhi is full of admiration. There is a way to unseal other people’s acupoint without touching. You can use the light brushing of the corner of your sleeve, or use the ‘one finger Dhyana’ through the empty air … Aiyo, it’s not right, Xiao Shishu [young martial uncle] has not cultivated internal energy, you cannot use these techniques. Let Shizhi think it over …”

Actually, all he had to do was to enter the room himself and lightly brush the corner of his sleeve, or perhaps use the ‘one finger Dhyana’ through the empty air, then the girl’s acupoint would be unsealed immediately. But since his martial uncle had asked, he must try to come up with an answer. However, how difficult it was for someone without internal energy to unseal acupoint without using fingers or massage? Even if he thought about it for a year or so, he would not necessarily be able to come up with anything.

Listening to him for a long time without getting any answer, Wei Xiaobao pushed the door a little bit, and saw Cheng Guan was looking up with a blank stare, lost in thought. He would not be surprised if Cheng Guan could stay motionless and speechless like that for six hours. Thereupon he closed the door and turned around, thinking that when he unsealed Mu Jianping’s acupoint at the Imperial Palace that day, he was using first-class technique all the way to the ninth-class technique: pinching, massaging, beating and jabbing, without the least bit of second thought. Although she was a junzhu who should be respected, in his eyes, he did not consider her important at all; however, in front of this nameless young woman, why did he tremble with fear and venerate her as if she was a deity?

Glancing toward the girl, he saw her delicate eyebrows were tightly knitted together with a distressed expression; he could not help but feeling a deep compassion toward her. Picking up a wooden fish mallet, he walked over toward her and said, “In the previous life Wei Xiaobao owed you a debt. In this life I fear neither the Heaven nor the Earth, yet I fear you, a young Miss. Right now I surrender to you, I really want to unseal your acupoints, and not deliberately want to take advantage of you.” Finished speaking, he took off his monk robe, and gently struck the inside of her left knee several times with the wooden fish mallet.

The girl stared at him coldly, her small mouth was tightly shut. Wei Xiaobao jabbed the mallet several more times and asked, “How do you feel?”

The girl said, “You … other than speaking some rogue words, you don’t know anything.”

Cheng Guan’s internal energy was deep, his light poke with his finger penetrated deep into the acupoint, although Wei Xiaobao’s placement of the wooden fish mallet was very accurate, his strength was lacking, he failed to unseal the acupoint. Hearing the girl’s sarcastic remark, he could not suppress his anger, and struck the wooden fish mallet heavily down several times. “Ah!” the girl screamed. Wei Xiaobao was startled. “Does it hurt?” he asked.

“I … I … I …” the girl angrily said. Wei Xiaobao moved to her right knee, but this time he started beating gently. After pounding several times, the girl’s body slightly trembled. “That’s it!” Wei Xiaobao happily said, “Originally Shaolin Pai only has 72 unique skills, from now on there will be 73. This new unique skill is invented by the Eminent Monk Hui Ming Chanshi, it is called … it is called the ‘Wooden Fish Mallet Acupoint Unsealing Divine Technique’, hey hey …”

While he was feeling complacent, suddenly he felt a dull pain on the small of his back; he was dumbstruck. The girl suddenly rolled around and sat up, she reached out to snatch his dagger and thrust it into his chest. “Aiyo!” Wei Xiaobao cried out, “You murder your own husband …” and fell sitting down on the ground.

The girl snatched her willow-leaf saber that was placed by her side; pulled the door open, and bolted out of the meditation room.

Cheng Guan stretched out his arms to block, he called out in alarm, “Nu Shizhu, you … killed … killed my Shishu … that … that …”

The girl moved the willow-leaf saber from her left hand to her right, ‘Shua! Shua! Shua!’ she hacked three times in succession. Cheng Guan flicked the sleeve of his robe. The girl’s legs went numb and she tumbled down.

---

[1] Orig. ‘Wei Menyao Shi’, shi – maiden name. Menyao –shaking/rocking the gate.

[foxs]

Cheng Guan rushed toward Wei Xiaobao’s side; he flicked several times with the middle finger of his right hand to seal the acupoints all around Wei Xiaobao’s wound. “Amitabha, my Buddha is merciful,” he said. With three fingers he pinched the hilt of the dagger and gently pulled it out, blood was seeping out of the wound. Noticing the bleeding was not too bad, Cheng Guan hurriedly untied Wei Xiaobao’s clothes, and saw the wound to be approximately half a cun [± ½”], and the cut was not too wide. He repeatedly said, “Amitabha.”

Wei Xiaobao was wearing his treasured vest; if not for the fact that his dagger was incomparably sharp, he would not have been wounded at all. Although the dagger penetrated his clothes, its force was greatly reduced and only went into his flesh shallowly. However, looking at his bleeding chest and feeling the pain from the wound, he thought his life would be difficult to save. He mumbled, “Murder your own husband … (cough, cough) … murder your … your own …”

The girl was lying on the floor, she cried and said, “It was me who killed him, Old Monk, quickly kill me to … to pay for … for his life.”

“Ay,” Cheng Guan sighed, “My Shishu has enlightened you. Nu Shizhu, if you persist on your wrong doings, there is nothing I can do. But a violent crime like this … a murder, it is rather too much.”

Wei Xiaobao said, “I … I’m about to die. (Cough), you murder your own …”

Cheng Guan stared blankly. Dashing out of the room, he fetched the medicine to treat metal-cut wound and applied it on Wei Xiaobao’s wound, saying, “Shishu, you have great compassion and great mercy, you enlightened the fierce and uncontrollable, your karmic reward has not been exhausted yet, you won’t die this easily. Besides, your injury is not serious, it’s not a big deal.”

Hearing Cheng Guan said that his injury was not serious, Wei Xiaobao’s spirit was greatly aroused, and felt that his wound was not too painful after all. “Stoop down,” he said, “Aiyo, I am going to die, I am going to die!”

Cheng Guan stooped down and put his ear next to Wei Xiaobao’s mouth. Wei Xiaobao said in a low voice, “You may unseal her acupoint, but don’t let her out of the room. Wait until she finishes using all martial art skills she knew, and then … and then …”

“And then what?” Cheng Guan asked.

“At that time … at that time we …” Wei Xiaobao stammered, while saying in his heart, “Even until then, we still cannot let her go.” He said, “Just … just follow my instruction … quickly … quickly … I am about to die; once I died, I cannot die again!”

Although Cheng Guan did not understand his intention, hearing the urgency in his voice, he turned around and snapped his fingers to unseal her blocked acupoints.

The girl saw how sneaky Wei Xiaobao was talking to Cheng Guan, she thought that this young evil monk was wily and mischievous, at the death’s door, he must be planning some treacherous scheme to deal with me, otherwise, why would he want to let me go? Immediately she wanted to leap up, but her acupoints had just been unsealed, the blood had not flowed freely yet, her legs were still numb and weak, she tumbled down again. Cheng Guan looked at her with blank expression on his face, while his mouth repeatedly calling the names of Buddha.

The girl was frightened even more, she shouted, “Quickly kill me with one palm strike, tormenting people like this is not the act of a hero and warrior.”

Cheng Guan said, “Xiao Shishu said we cannot let you go at this time, naturally we cannot kill you either.”

The girl was greatly alarmed; her face blushed, she thought, “This young evil monk said that no matter what he must take me as his wife, otherwise he would die without his eyes closed. Could it be … could it be that before he breathes his last he wants … he wants to make me … make me … whatever … whatever wife?” Leaning sideways, she picked up the willow-leaf saber from the floor and forcefully chopped it onto her own forehead.

Cheng Guan flicked the sleeve of his robe again, it coiled around the edge of the blade, while the left sleeve brushed toward her face. The girl felt a strong gust of wind sweeping her face, and had no choice but to release her grip on the saber and leaped backward to evade. Cheng Guan flicked his sleeve again, the willow-leaf saber shot up, ‘pop!’ it stuck on the beam of the roof.

Seeing Cheng Guan was looking up at the saber, the girl kicked her left foot and slipped away from his left side. Cheng Guan stretched out his hand to block. Forming her right hand’s five fingers into a claw the girl attacked his eyes. Cheng Guan flipped his hand to catch her right elbow, he said, “’Smoke Over the Eyes’, this is Jiangnan’s Jiang Family’s martial art.”

The girl’s leg flew toward his lower abdomen. Cheng Guan slightly bent his waist and the kick hit an empty air. “This is ‘Sound of Footsteps in an Empty Valley’, originated from Jin Yang of Shanxi, a Shatuo people’s martial art,” he said, “But Shatuo people must have another name, Lao Na is ignorant and inexperienced, I looked everywhere but could not find out. I wonder if Nu Shizhu knew the original name of this move.”

Why would the girl pay him any attention? Her fists punched, her feet kicked, her fingers poked, her elbows struck; launching move after move endlessly. Cheng Guan identified all the moves one by one, only her movement was really fast, he did not have enough time to say it out loud; he had no choice but parrying the attacks and simply memorized everything in his heart. The girl successively launched several dozen moves, but Cheng Guan effortlessly neutralized everything. Seeing it would be difficult for her to escape, she was extremely frightened; her breathing failed to flow, she swayed several times, and then she fell down, fainted.

Cheng Guan sighed and said, “Nu Shizhu is greedy and covetous, you learned various schools and sects’ exquisite moves, yet without possessing enough internal energy; naturally you won’t last in a prolonged fight. In Lao Na’s opinion, you’d better cultivating internal energy from the beginning, and in a proper way. Fighting this time, your strength failed. If I help you by waking you up, undoubtedly you will want to fight again, and then inevitably you will suffer internal injury; you’d better lie down to rest for a moment, what does Nu Shizhu think? But you must never misunderstand, thinking that Lao Na is only watching with folded arms, knowing you are fainting and paying you no attention. Aiyo, Lao Na is so muddle-headed, you are already fainted, of course you won’t hear a thing, yet I kept talking endlessly.”

He went toward the couch to check Wei Xiaobao’s pulse, and found it to be steady and solid, there was no indication of danger at all; he said, “Shishu, don’t you worry, your injury is not the least bit serious.”

Wei Xiaobao laughed and said, “Do you remember all the moves that the Little Miss used?”

“I do,” Cheng Guan replied, “But to find techniques to deal with her that are simple, clear and easy to practice is indeed not easy.”

“Just remember the moves she used,” Wei Xiaobao said, “As for how to deal with her, we can think about it slowly, it won’t be too late.”

“Yes, yes,” Cheng Guan said, “Shishu’s direction is right.”

Wei Xiaobao said, “After she has finished using all her punching and kicking skills, have her use her saber, and take note of her moves.”

“Right,” Cheng Guan said, “We must also remember her moves using a weapon. There is one difficulty though: her willow-leaf saber is stuck on the beam. I am afraid she cannot jump that high, she won’t be able to retrieve it.”

“What about you?” Wei Xiaobao asked, “Can’t you jump up to get it?”

Cheng Guan was startled, then he burst out laughing and said, “Shizhi is indeed muddle-headed.”

His laughter had awakened the girl. Propping herself up with both hands, she ran toward the door. Cheng Guan flicked his left sleeve to push the side of the girl’s body. The girl staggered and hit the wall. Cheng Guan flicked his right sleeve toward the wall to support her body gently. Instantly the girl was able to steady her footing. She was startled, and realized at once that in all honesty that the difference between her martial art and this old monk’s is simply too far. If she continued fighting, he would make a fool of her without she being able to do anything. Thereupon she took two steps back and sat down on a chair.

“Uh,” Cheng Guan was puzzled, “You are not fighting anymore?”

The girl angrily said, “I am not your match, why would I want to fight you?”

Cheng Guan said, “If you don’t fight, how can I recognize the style you are using? How can I think of a way to counter that style? Quickly fight!”

The girl thought, “Fine, turns out you want me to fight so that you can understand my martial arts, I simply won’t let you know.” Suddenly she sprang up, her fists went straight up and down, waving wildly and hitting arbitrarily, her feet also kicked randomly, without using any technique at all.

Cheng Guan was greatly astonished. “Uh! Ah!” he exclaimed, “That’s odd! Strange! Ay! Wow! What’s that? Amazing! That’s weird!” He had a feeling that he had seen those moves before, but it also seemed that he had never seen them. Some moves seemed similar to certain school or sect’s style, yet the resemblance was so little, the difference was so great; the moves looked right, but felt wrong. In that instant his brain was overloaded with confusion. He felt that the martial arts he diligently and painstakingly accumulated over the dozens of years had suddenly changed, the moves he learned following the Heaven’s law and Earth’s principle, the golden rule and jade regulation, in a split second everything was shattered and nothing was left.

He did not realize that the girl did not move according to any martial art style, she was simply beating and kicking randomly. She knew that no matter what move she used, this old monk could not possibly harm her, at most he would only seal her acupoint so that she would lie down on the floor without being able to move at all, nothing more. If he really wanted to subdue her, it would be as easy as lifting his own hand. Even if she had used the most exquisite of martial art move, the result would be the same; so she might as well beating and kicking randomly. You want to study my martial art style, I simply won’t let you take a single glimpse.

Cheng Guan was very familiar with the world’s each school and sect’s martial art; however, he had never thought that in this world, there are millions of people who have never learned martial art, who, when they fight, if they want to punch they would simply punch, if they want to kick, they would simply kick. They do not understand any fist technique or kicking technique, do not know whether certain move is correct or wrong. Seeing the girl executing strange move and weird style, each one seemed more bizarre than the previous one, each one he had never seen in his entire life, each one he had never even heard about, he could not help but feeling frightened and was at a loss.

In all his life he had always lived inside Shaolin Temple, from the time he shaved his head he had never left the Temple’s gate even for a single step. Whenever someone was using his fist and feet in Shaolin Temple, naturally each move would follow some kind of style or technique; whenever someone was talking about each sect’s martial art, naturally he would mention some exquisite and original move. Everybody in the world would have seen people punching and kicking wildly like this little girl, only this Head of Bo’re Hall of Shaolin Temple, who was extremely knowledgeable in martial art, Cheng Guan Dashi [great master], had never seen anything like this, and had never heard people mentioning this either.

After watching a dozen more moves, he was even more stunned, he could not even sigh or say something like ‘strange, amazing, weird’, and so on. All kinds of styles came thick and fast before his eyes. “That looks like ‘Falling from Dragon Ride’ of Wudang’s Long Fist, but the style appears to be incorrect. Perhaps it is an alteration of Kongtong Pai’s ‘Dragon Prancing on the Cloud’? Uh, that kick looks even weirder, if she kicks straight out like that, the opponent could easily catch it, and grab her ankle. But in martial art study, greatly skillful person may not necessarily win over clumsy one, there must be an extremely formidable change that comes later. Ah, in this move she is grabbing with both hands, apparently she wants to grab my hair, but obviously I do not have any hair, so this move must be a fake one. Martial art study pays particular attention to solid in the midst of void, and void in the midst of solid. Why would she want to grab Buddhist monk’s hair? There must be a profound meaning behind this, I simply must consider the details carefully …” The more the girl moved arbitrarily, the more Cheng Guan was baffled. From being puzzled, his admiration slowly grew; from admiration, he slowly became frightened.

Wei Xiaobao could see that the girl was moving randomly, yet in all seriousness Cheng Guan was diligently watching and studying everything; he could not help but make a ‘Ha!’ sound as he broke into laughter. This laugh affected his wound, which became really painful that he could only clench his teeth trying to endure. In that moment pain and amusement mixed together, and it was really difficult to endure.

Cheng Guan was at a loss, anxious and perplexed, suddenly hearing Wei Xiaobao’s laugh, he blushed from ear to ear, thinking, “Shishu is laughing because I do not know this Nu Shizhu’s fantastic moves; perhaps he would ask her to be the Head of Bo’re Hall.” When he turned his head around, he saw Wei Xiaobao’s painful expression, and felt even more grateful, “Shishu is indeed kind-hearted, he wants me to hand over the Head position to this Nu Shizhu, but he cannot bear to say it.”

Seeing the girl’s punching and kicking was getting more and more chaotic, he thought, “The people of old said that when one has reached outstanding attainments in martial art, even hanging something on the antelope’s antler won’t leave any trace that’s possible to seek[?]. I heard that in the previous dynasty there was this Dugu Quibai [Dugu Seeking-a-loss] Daxia [great hero/knight], and then there was Linghu Chong Daxia, who defeat a move without a move; they were unequalled in their era. Could it be … could it be …”

He wanted to try, hence he stepped forward and casually punching and kicking, trying to overthrow the girl. However, when a martial art master is making his move, he must look clearly the opponent’s move first, and then thinking about a way to counter it later. Since he was already at a complete loss over the girl’s random punching and kicking, it was like a tiger cub that saw a donkey for the first time, who was terrified endlessly.

Actually, the girl did not dare to attack him. One was punching and kicking randomly with anger that was difficult to restrain, the other was having his imagination running wild while his heart was extremely frightened. After moving around randomly for quite a while, the girl’s hands and feet were exhausted and aching. Thinking that in any case it would be difficult for her to escape, her heart turned bitter, she swayed and abruptly sat down on the ground.

Cheng Guan was greatly shocked; he thought, “According to legend, when someone has trained martial art to an extremely high level, he could sit down on the ground and still injure the opponent from a distant. I am afraid … I am afraid …” His brain was overloaded with confusion; in his fright, his blood surged up, slowly he sat down and passed out.

The girl was startled but delighted; afraid that those two monks were setting up some sinister scheme, she did not dare to step forward and kill those old and young, two monks, but sprang up and ran out of the meditation room.

Suddenly seeing a woman rushing out, the monks of Bo’re Hall were taken by surprise. Without their superior’s order, who would dare to step forward and stop her? Wei Xiaobao was lying on the couch and could only watch helplessly.

After quite a while, Cheng Guan slowly regained his consciousness. With an ashamed expression he said, “Shishu, I … I am really ashamed to face our Temple’s forefathers and ancestors.”

Forcing a laugh, Wei Xiaobao said, “Where do you think you want to go?”

Cheng Guan said, “That Nu Shizhu’s martial art is exquisite, Shizhi did not recognize a single move, I am ignorant and inexperienced, I am really ashamed.” He tried hard to remember the girl’s style, but her moves changed irregularly without any pattern, completely without any set of rule he could follow; how could he remember it? Shakily he tried to stand up while supporting himself against the wall, but he almost faint again.

Wei Xiaobao laughed and said, “You … you think moving around wildly like that is an exquisite martial art? Ha ha … hee hee … this … this is so … so funny … I want to die!”

Cheng Guan was puzzled. “Is Shishu saying that … that was moving around wildly? And not … not exquisite martial art?”

Wei Xiaobao pressed down his wound and struggled hard not to laugh. Beads of sweat appeared on his forehead. He could not refrain from coughing and said with a laugh, “That was something that … that all children in the world can do well. Ha ha … aiyo … I will die of laughter!”

Cheng Guan blew out a breath, in his heart he was still half believing half doubting, but a smile appeared on his face. “Shishu, was that really moving around wildly?” he asked, “How come I have never seen anything like that?”

Wei Xiaobao laughed and said, “Naturally there has never been such martial art in Shaolin Temple.”

Cheng Guan stared at the ceiling and was lost in thought for half a day. Finally he slapped his thigh and said, “That’s right. Although that Nu Shizhu’s punching and kicking is peculiar, it is actually very easy to neutralize, we only need to use Shaolin Long Fist’s shallowest move to prevail. It’s just that … it’s just that Shizhi thought that there is no such easy thing like that in the world, great skill may appear as clumsiness, great intelligence may appear to be stupidity, good merchant may hide his treasure away so that no one knows about it. There must be a profound martial art principle hidden inside a style that looks extremely easy on the outside. Who would have thought that those random punching and kicking were not profound martial art at all? This is very strange. Why did that Nu Shizhu display such style, which seems to be unfit for elegant hall, in here? Won’t that means she was simply making a fool of herself?”

[foxs]

Wei Xiaobao laughed and said, “I think it’s not strange at all. She could not produce any new style, hence she simply moved her hands and feet randomly. Ay, ha ha … hee hee …” He could not help bursting into laughter again.

Wei Xiaobao’s injury was light, plus Shaolin Temple’s metal cut wound medicine was extremely effective; after recuperating for about ten days, he was completely healed. He was the current Emperor’s proxy, he held a place of honor in the Temple, nobody would dare to ask about his business. Since nobody knew about this, as long as he did not say anything, others would not find out.

During his recovery, Cheng Guan recorded the two women’s each style and each move clearly, he also figured out a way to counter each one. As soon as Wei Xiaobao was healed, he passed on each move each style to him. Although the moves Cheng Guan taught him were quite diverse, they were based primarily on the ‘Picking Flower Grab and Capture’ technique. ‘Picking Flower Grab and Capture’ was Shaolin Pai’s profound martial art, it used pure and profound internal energy as the foundation, the moves were not complicated, but were powerful and elegant, without the slightest degree of aggressiveness.

According to Zen Buddhism legend passed down from generation to generation, at the assembly on Lingshan, Sakyamuni Buddha picked a golden Boluo flower and showed it to the crowd. The audience was silent, no one understood his meaning, only Revered Monk Jiaye [Kasyapa] broke into a smile. Buddha said, “I possess the true Dharma eye, the marvelous mind of Nirvana, the true form of the formless, the subtle [D]harma [G]ate that does not rest on words or letters but is a special transmission outside of the scriptures. This I entrust to Mahākāśyapa.[1]”

Mahakasyapa was one of Buddha’s ten main disciples, he was known as ‘the first toutuo[2]’, the Zen Buddhists revered him as their forefather. Shaolin Temple can be classified as Zen Buddhism, who pays particular attention of self-awareness. Thinking about Buddha picking the flower, Kasyapa smiled. Without a word, he had already comprehended the meaning; wasn’t that a state of comprehension beyond amazing?

The people of later generation used the term ‘picking flower’ as a name for this qin na [grab and capture/grappling] technique. Naturally each move was beautiful and each style elegant, a lot more interesting to watch than ordinary flipping of the hand or pulling of the leg. It’s just that Wei Xiaobao did not have any foundation in internal energy cultivation; using this kind of refined and elegant technique against a martial art master, as soon as the opponent lightly pushed, he would be immediately thrown down and roll around several times on the ground. He fell down until his nose turned blue and his eyes swollen, needless to say, he would either wail or laugh loudly. Luckily those two women did not have any internal energy either, hence the technique he learned would come in handy in dealing with them. Cheng Guan thought that the opponents were a couple of girls, they must not treat them roughly, hence the reason he put emphasis on this kind of technique.

When Wei Xiaobao learned martial art from Hai Dafu, because he was under supervision, he received double benefits: learning the move and how to use it, as a result, he did learn something from Hai Dafu. Later on Chen Jinnan gave him a martial art manual, which he only learned several times, and then he stopped altogether because it was too difficult. As for the six moves taught by Cult Leader Hong, husband and wife, he only practiced carelessly to get the general idea; he stopped practicing as soon as he left the Divine Dragon Island. The reason he learned martial art this time was to get that green-clothes girl as his wife. He had made an oath that in order to be her husband, he was willing to climb the mountain of blades or go down a deep fryer, when he died he would enter the eighteenth level of hell. It was indeed not a small matter; not surprisingly, he trained very diligently. He learned every move every style, and sparred with Cheng Guan.

After training for several days, his laziness came back, suddenly he thought about Shuang’er, “That girl’s martial art is not weak, most likely she will be able to deal with these two girls. I only need to have Shuang’er by my side as my escort, I don’t need to personally practice martial art.” But then he had a second thought, “I must use my own skill to get that green-clothed girl. It would be great to smell the fragrance of her face. If I ask Shuang’er to seal her acupoint and then I smell the fragrance of her face, I would appear too gutless, that green-clothed girl will look down on me even more. Besides, if I ask Shuang’er to do this kind of thing, although she would obey me, in her heart she must be grieved, I must not wrong her too much. Even if their faces both look happy, I have to be fair, neither one of them must be discontented.” In the end, he made a strenuous effort to learn the style.

One particular day Cheng Guan said, “Shishu, You are diligently learning this martial art, actually … actually it won’t do you any good. If you grab me like this, and I reacted using my internal energy, your wrist … your wrist will be … will be …”

Wei Xiaobao laughed and said, “My wrist will be ‘crack!’ broke in two."

Cheng Guan said, “You are my superior, no way would I use my internal strength against you, Shizhi absolutely will not dare. However, in Shizhi’s opinion, practicing Shaolin Long Fist from the start, step-by-step in proper order is the way to go.”

Wei Xiaobao said, “Why do you say that what we are practicing right now is not the way to go?”

“This style does not have any internal energy foundation,” Cheng Guan replied, “If you are facing a martial art master, it does not matter how ingenious the changes are, inevitably you will fail and be wiped over the floor. It is only useful to deal with those two Nu Shizhu.”

Wei Xiaobao laughed. “That’s wonderful,” he said, “The only reason I learn this is only to deal with those two Nu Shizhu.”

Cheng Guan looked at him with a baffled expression, he was completely lost. He said, “Supposing Shishu will not come across those Nu Shizhu again in the future, won’t the effort of learning this martial art be wasted? Not to mention you will delay the time to learn proper martial art.”

Wei Xiaobao shook his head and said, “If I can’t see this Nu Shizhu again, I will definitely die; what use will learning proper martial art be?” What Cheng Guan said was ‘those two Nu Shizhu’, but Wei Xiaobao was referring to ‘this Nu Shizhu’.

Cheng Guan was even more baffled; he asked, “Could it be that Shishu has been hit by that Nu Shizhu’s poison and thus must find her to get the antidote, otherwise your life would be difficult to protect?”

Wei Xiaobao said in his heart, “I was talking about the matter between a man and a woman, where did this old monk get that idea?” With a grim expression he said, “Exactly, exactly, I was hit by her poison; the poison has entered my five viscera and six bowels, into the bones and marrows of my entire body, only she can neutralize it.”

“Aiyo!” Cheng Guan exclaimed, “Our Temple’s Cheng Zhao Shidi is adept at neutralizing poison, let me ask him to come here to examine Shishu.”

Suppressing his laugh, Wei Xiaobao said, “No need, no need, the poison that hit me is actually slow to take effect, she is the only antidote, other people are useless. The old monk Cheng Zhao is even more useless.”

Cheng Guan nodded. “Turns out only she has the antidote,” he said. Wei Xiaobao was saying ‘only she was the antidote’, Cheng Guan erroneously assumed that ‘only she has the antidote’. One word makes the meaning entirely different.

The old monk was anxious, he muttered to himself, “Ay, Shishu is being hit by the strange poison of this Nu Shizhu’s unique school, luckily it is slow to take effect …”

The girl’s martial art was actually very broad and diverse, the techniques Cheng Guan came up with to counter her were not a few either, some were more challenging than the others, Wei Xiaobao did not have any martial art foundation at all, how could he learn everything in such a short period of time? Every day he sparred with Cheng Guan, oftentimes he treated this white-bearded old monk as that beautiful young green-clothed girl.Sometimes he went as far as speaking with him frivolously and treated him tenderly. Luckily Cheng Guan did not understand anything, he thought this young martial uncle had a deep comprehension of Buddhist teaching, and that he was using a profound Buddhist allegory. Cheng Guan blamed himself for being stupid for failing to grasp the essence of the attainment of the spiritual learning.

One day the two of them were talking about the two girls’ saber technique in Cheng Guan’s meditation room when the Bo’re Hall monk on duty came to the door and said, “Fangzhang Dashi [great master abbot] is inviting Shishuzu and Shibo [grand martial uncle and martial (older) uncle] to the main hall to discuss something.”

The two of them went to the Hall of Great Strength[3] and saw several dozens of guests in the Hall, some were sitting down, some were standing up. Abbot Hui Cong Chanshi was sitting on the second seat of honor to accompany the guests. On the main seats of honor sat three people. The first one was wearing Mongolian nobleman attire, he looked about twenty or so; the second one was a middle-aged Lama, thin, short and swarthy; the third one was a military officer, from his uniform it looked like he was a commander of the army, about forty something years old. Standing behind these three were a mix of several dozen military officers, Lamas, and about a dozen or so men in civilian clothing. They all looked strong and heroic, obviously they knew martial arts.

Seeing Wei Xiaobao entering the Hall, Abbot Hui Cong stood up and said, “Shidi, honored guests are descending on our Temple. This is His Highness Prince Galdan [ge’er dan] of Mongolia, this is Da Fashi[4] Great Lama Chang Qi of Tibet, and this one is Ma Bao, Ma Daren[5], a military commander under Ping Xi Wang’s banner.” Turning toward the three guests, he said, “And this is Lao Na’s Shidi, Hui Ming Chanshi.”

Everybody could see that Wei Xiaobao was young man with a flippant expression, a complete picture of a frivolous teenager, yet unexpectedly he was a Chanshi of the same standing as the Abbot himself; they were all astonished. Prince Galdan could not help but laughing; he said, “This little eminent monk is really young and fascinating. Ha ha … odd, very odd.”

Wei Xiaobao put his palms together and said, “Amitabha, this big prince is really big and amusing. Hee hee … strange, very strange!”

Galdan angrily said, “What’s so amusing and strange aboutme?”

Wei Xiaobao replied, “Whatever is fascinating and odd about the little monk is the same as whatever is amusing and strange about Your Highness; it’s hard to differentiate between the elder and younger brother, one is just as bad as the other.” Finished speaking, he sat down on the seat below Abbot Hui Cong, while Cheng Guan stood behind him. Hearing Wei Xiaobao, everybody thought that it was an unfathomable truth, and they all secretly praised him.

Abbot Hui Cong said, “I wonder what instruction the three honored guests have by gracing our humble Temple with your presence.”

Lama Chang Qi said, “The three of us came across each other by accident along the way. Upon talking to each other, we agreed that Shaolin Temple is the Mount Tai and Big Dipper constellation [i.e.the ultimate] of martial art study in the Central Plains, worthy of our admiration. The three of us are uncouth people of the borders, what we see and hear is shallow, thereupon we come to your precious temple together to admire. We will be much honored to see the eminent monks’ respected example.” Although he was a Tibetan Lama, he spoke with good Beijing bureaucratic language, his voice was sharp, clear and bright, his manner in speaking was elegant.

“We do not dare,” Hui Cong said, “In Mongolia, Tibet and Yunnan, three places, Buddhist teaching is usually flourishing. The three gentlemen have received Buddha’s illumination for a long time, your wisdom and self-awareness must be clear, what other direction we can hope to give you?” Chang Qi Lama was talking about martial art study, but Abbot Hui Cong was talking about the Dharma. Although Shaolin Temple was renowned all over the world for its martial art, yet all the eminent monks of the Temple took diligently cultivated Buddhist doctrine as the proper way, they always thought that the martial art study was merely a minor detail to protect and sustain the Buddhist teaching.

Galdan said, “I heard that Shaolin Temple’s previous generations passed on altogether seventy-two special skills, which overawe the world, not often to find a match. Is it possible for Fangzhang Dashi to ask the eminent monks to demonstrate them one by one so that Xiao Wang [little king, referring to self] and the others could have our eyes opened?”

Hui Cong said, “It is only proper to let Your Highness know that the hearsay of the Jianghu is not to be trusted. Our humble Temple’s monks are diligently cultivating Zen meditation in order to reach true enlightenment. Although some of us have spare time to practice martial art, it is nothing more than to have a strong and healthy body. Trivial small skills, not worth mentioning.”

“Fangzhang,” Galdan said, “You are indeed frank and candid. All we ask is that you demonstrate these 72 unique skills, we only want to watch, not to steal it; why should you be narrow-minded?”

ShaolinTemple’s reputation was simply too great, over the last thousand years, nearly every month there were people who pay a visit asking for advice. Some came with sincerity because they really wanted to learn, some with evil intention to pick a quarrel. The monks of the Temple always politely declined. Even if the visitors were extremely arrogant, the Temple’s monks always treated them with due respect, and would never argue. Only when the visitors resorted to violence would the monks be forced into fighting back. Otherwise, they would always send off the visitors with good wishes. Something like this Prince Galdan just said, Abbot Hui Cong had heard countless times. He simply smiled and said, “If the three gentlemen are willing to expound the Zen teaching and discuss the Buddhist doctrine, Lao Seng [old monk] will convene the monks to respectfully listen to your discourse. As for some martial art, our Temple always follows the rule that we do not dare to show off our meager skills before an expert, to be presumptuous toward the visiting benefactors.”

Galdan’s eyebrows stood up as he loudly said, “In that case, Shaolin Temple only enjoys unearned reputation. The Temple’s monks’ martial art is not as good as dog fart, not worth a qian.”

Hui Cong smiled and said, “Everything is life is indeed fabricated, is indeed not as good as dog fart, not worth a qian. The Five Aggregates [from Sanskrit ‘skandha’] are empty, our bodies are empty, reputation is no more than worldly possessions. Your Highness says our humble Temple only enjoys unearned reputation; that is the truth.”

Galdan had not expected this old monk did not get the least bit angry; he could not help but was startled. Standing up, he laughed loudly while pointing his finger at Wei Xiaobao and said, “Little monk, are you also not as good as dog fart, not worth a qian?”

Wei Xiaobao giggled and said, “Naturally Big Prince surpasses Little Monk. Little monk is indeed not as good as dog fart, not worth a qian. Big Prince is definitely as good as dog fart, and worth a qian. This is called you win by a gambling chip.” Immediately some people from among those who stand snickered.

Galdan was furious; he wanted to leave his seat and use force against Wei Xiaobao immediately, but then he had a second thought, “This little monk’s seniority in Shaolin Temple is very high, perhaps there is something wrong here, which I don’t know yet.” Panting with rage, he struggled hard to suppress his anger.

Wei Xiaobao said, “Your Highness does not need to lose your temper. You must know that the smelliest thing in the world is not dog fart, rather, it is one’s words. There are some people, who, when they speak, stink to the high heaven, just like … just like … hey, hey, I don’t need to say it. As for not worth a qian, it is not the lowliest thing. The lowliest thing is someone who owes other tens of million, hundreds of million taels, yet refuse to pay. Whether Your Highness owe others money or not, you alone know it in your heart.” Galdan was stunned with his mouth agape, temporarily he did not know how to respond.

Abbot Hui Cong said, “Shidi’s words contain profound Buddhist allegory; my admiration, my admiration. Affairs of life, karma and retribution, everything has its cause and definitely has its fruit. Committing evil deeds will result in evil consequence. Not worth a qian is no more than ‘without virtue, without malice’, it is a lot better than owing innumerable evil debts.”

Eminent monks of Zen Buddhism were constantly in search of Zen truth. In actuality, Wei Xiaobao was saying those things only to ridicule Galdan’s casual remark, yet in Abbot Hui Cong’s ears, it concealed deep crucial points.

Listening to the Abbot’s explanation, Cheng Guan was immediately enlightened; he could not help but sighing in admiration, “Hui Ming Shishu is young yet virtuous,” he said happily, “He had attained the wonderful comprehension of the truth. Lao Na has been studying under him for several months, when I meditate recently, my brain seems to be clearing up a lot.”

A little monk babbled nonsense, two old monks echoed each other; to outsiders, they seemed to be deliberately trying to embarrass Galdan. Galdan’s face turned deep red; suddenly he sprang up from his chair and pounced on Wei Xiaobao. The hosts and the guests were sitting opposite to each other, separated by a distance of approximately two zhang [±20 feet/6 m], but his movement was vigorous and nimble, quickly he arrived in front of Wei Xiaobao, both hands formed a couple of claws, one clawed Wei Xiaobao’s face, the other clawed his chest. Before the claws even arrived, Wei Xiaobao had already felt a strong gust of wind enveloping his body. He wanted to dodge, but there was not the least bit of leeway, and had no choice but to resign himself to extinction.

Abbot Hui Cong’s right hand sleeve lightly brushed away to block in front of Galdan. As Galdan’s powerful force collided with his sleeve, Galdan felt the chi and blood inside his chest bubbling up, as if he was hitting a thick steel wall, lined with a layer of cotton on its surface. Without being able to control his own body, he staggered back three steps. He made a strenuous effort to halt, but unexpectedly he could not control his feet and was pushed back three more steps. In the meantime, the incoming force vanished, but in that instant, his own strength also vanished without a trace. He was greatly shocked; his knees went soft and he fell sitting down. “Bad,” he thought, “This time I am greatly humiliated.” He had just had that thought when he suddenly realized that his buttocks came in contact with a hard wooden board; unexpectedly he was returning to his own chair.

---

[1] From Wikipedia: http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Flower_sermon. Mahakasyapa actually means ‘Great Kasyapa’.

[2] Toutuo is Buddhist monk who did not shave his head.

[3] Reminder: the main hall of a Buddhist temple containing the main image of veneration.

[4] Reminder: fashi is one who has mastered the sutras.

[5] Reminder: daren [lit. big man] is a title of respect toward government official.

[foxs]

The force behind the flick of Abbot Hui Cong’s sleeve was soft and dispersed, there was no trace of aggressiveness at all. The force that collided with the opponent was exceptionally accurate, it was just enough to push Galdan back to his own chair. If the force was slightly stronger, Galdan would undoubtedly crash and break the chair, and he would tumble backward. If the force was slightly lighter, Galdan would not reach the chair so that when he fell down, he would sat on the ground.

When some of the visitors who happened to have profound martial art witnessed how Hui Cong’s light flick with his sleeve was brimming with an outstanding attainment in martial art training, they could not help but bursting out in loud cheer.

Not being humiliated on the spot, Galdan was somewhat consoled. Quietly he took a deep breath and felt that his internal energy was not damaged; the old monk did not injure him internally at all, hence was delighted. But then he recalled that just now he was so hot-headed, yet it seemed that he was not humiliated; he realized that in fact he had made a complete fool of himself, immediately his face turned red. Hearing some people behind him cheering, he presumed that they were not cheering him being beaten by the old monk; his anger flared again.

Wei Xiaobao was still shaken. Hui Cong turned around and said to him, “Shidi, your mental power is indeed superior, external force coming fiercely, you neither see nor take any notice. The ‘Collection of Great Treasures Sutra’ says: ‘Like a man in a forest of thistles and thorns, being motionless means the thorn will not harm him. Rashness does not arise in his heart, anxiety will fade away happily. Rashness moves in his heart, the thorns will immediately prick him.’ The ancient sutra says, ‘When the heart is bitter, there will be no mood for happiness.’ Shidi is young, yet unexpectedly your meditation cultivation has reached the extremely high state of ‘constantly not in the mood, constantly motionless’; your root is indeed very deep, you have great wisdom and great intelligence.”

How would he know that not only Wei Xiaobao did not have the power to fight back, even if he had the desire to dodge, he simply could not? Galdan’s pounce was too fast; it was called the ‘thunderbolt surpass the covering of the ear’; it was not that one did not want to cover his ears, but rather he did not have time to cover his ears. With a clear heart Abbot Hui Cong was always looking for orthodox skill, normally he diligently and single-mindedly trying to reach the ‘non-self’ realm; therefore, when he saw Wei Xiaobao surprisingly did not care about either his own life and death or safety and danger, he could not help but admiring him completely. As for him warding off Galdan’s attack using the ‘worn-out cassock skill’ by sending his force via the flick of his sleeve, he felt it was not worth-mentioning instead.

Cheng Guan was even more full of admiration, he said, “Vajra Sutra says, ‘no self, no people, no living things, no long life’; unexpectedly Hui Ming Shishu has reached that state. Some other day he must have reached the Aruduoluo[1], three-despise three-enlightenment.”

Galdan had been in an uncontrollable rage, listening to these two old monks showering praises to this little monk, he roared, “Halisiba’er, nimahong, jianubiding’er!” Several warriors under his command behind him quickly waved their hands, several yellow rays flashed, nine golden projectiles separately flew toward Hui Cong, Cheng Guan and Wei Xiaobao’s chests.

The two sides were very close to each other, plus Wei Xiaobao and the others did not understand since Galdan gave the order to throw the projectiles in Mongolian, hence the projectiles were totally unexpected.

The nine projectiles came swiftly and were already at their chests. Hui Cong and Cheng Guan simultaneously cried out, “Aiyo!” Hui Cong still used the ‘worn-out cassock skill’ by flicking his sleeve to wrap around three projectiles. Cheng Guan joined his palms together with the move ‘saluting three precious treasures[2]’ to catch the three golden projectiles in his palms. ‘Pop!’ the three projectiles flying toward Wei Xiaobao all hit his chest.

These nine projectiles arrived almost at the same time, Hui Cong and Cheng Guan were going to help him, but it was simply too late. They were all shocked, but they only heard ‘plink, plink, plonk’, the three projectiles fell to the ground. Wei Xiaobao was wearing his treasured vest, the golden projectiles could not harm him.

Instantly the main hall was abuzz with sensation. Everybody saw how this little monk was very young, yet unexpectedly had mastered Shaolin Pai’s highest internal energy cultivation, the ‘Jin Gang Hu Ti Shen Gong[3]’; it was indeed inconceivable. They all thought, “No wonder this little monk belongs to Shaolin Pai’s ‘Hui’ generation, of the same standing with Shaolin Temple’s head monk, Hui Cong Fangzhang, who has made his name for several decades.”

Actually, Hui Cong and Cheng Guan’s techniques in catching the projectiles were also extremely brilliant; were it not for their internal energy cultivation had reached the stage of perfection, what they did would be very difficult to accomplish. It’s just that Wei Xiaobao’s ‘skill’ was too marvelous that the crowd did not pay attention to these two old monks.

While the crowd was still in awe, Chang Qi Lama laughed and said, “Little eminent monk’s ‘Jin Gang Hu Ti Shen Gong’ has been trained to such level, it is indeed not easy. However, it seems to me that this divine skill still has some shortcoming, it is still unable to shake the secret projectiles off completely, to such an extent that the monk robe is poked by three small holes.”

According to old legend, when this ‘Jin Gang Hu Ti Shen Gong’ has been trained to reach the pinnacle, there will be a layer of invisible force field around the body, so that before the enemy’s weapon or secret projectile even reaches the body, it will be shaken off immediately. However, it was no more than a legend circulating among the Wulin world, nobody knew whether there was a real person who had really trained to that level. When Chang Qi Lama said those words, people knew he was simply trying to ‘look for a bone in a chicken egg’, he was bent on playing down the opponent’s marvelous ability.

Being hit by the three golden projectiles, Wei Xiaobao’s chest was really painful, one of the projectile hit really close to his wound that the pain penetrated deep into his bones and marrow; he could not even breathe, how could he speak? All he could do was forcing a laugh. Yet the crowd thought that his cultivation had reached such an extremely high level that he did not feel it was worth the trouble to respond to Chang Qi’s pointless provocation. Quite a few people mused, “You said his divine skill has not been trained to perfection, I want to see if I shoot you three projectiles, whether three big holes will appear on your chest or not, not just three small holes appear on your clothes.” It’s just that they came together, so it was inconvenient to ridicule their companion.

Seeing Wei Xiaobao’s fierceness, Galdan’s rage immediately vanished. He thought, “Shaolin Pai’s martial art is indeed formidable.”

Chang Qi continued, “Finally Shaolin Temple’s martial art has indeed increased our knowledge; definitely it was not an unearned reputation, not as good as dog’s fart. However, we heard that your precious Temple has given shelter to women, which is rather deficient in following the clear regulation of monastic discipline.”

Hui Cong’s countenance sank; he said, “Great Lama is wrong! Our humble Temple does not accept female benefactors to enter the Temple to worship Buddha; where did you get the idea that we give shelter to women?”

Chang Qi laughed and said, “But the Jianghu is abuzz, a lot of people are saying that.”

Abbot Hui Cong smiled and said, “Why would we want to pay attention to rumors in Jianghu? Ultimately we must be like Hui Ming Shidi, external force coming fiercely, our hearts will be unmoved. That is the self-awareness of the wonderful truth, the evidence of true enlightenment skill.”

Chang Qi Lama said, “I heard that in this young eminent monk’s meditation room hidden an outstandingly beautiful woman, furthermore, it was he who kidnapped her with force. Could it be that Hui Ming Chanshi’s heart is also completely unmoved by this beautiful woman?”

By this time Wei Xiaobao had been able to catch his breat; he was shocked and thought, “How did they know?”

Then he immediately understood, “That’s right, that Miss wearing blue clothes ran away. Obviously she went back to their teacher to report. Looks like these men are the reinforcement she sent; today they are here to rescue my wife. He said I have a beautiful woman in my room, in that case, after my wife ran away, she has not met with them.” At once he smiled and said, “Whether there is a beautiful woman in my room or not will be evident as soon as you look. Gentlemen, there is no harm in you going to look.”

In a loud voice Galdan said, “Alright, we will search the Temple. As the water receded, the rocks appear.” Finished speaking, he rose up and waved his left hand. “Search the Temple!” he ordered. The men under his command started to move toward the back of the Hall.

Hui Cong said, “Your Highness wants to search our Temple, I wonder under whose order?”

Galdan said, “My order is enough, why must I receive other people’s order?”

Hui Cong said, “You are mistaken. Your Highness is a Mongolian Prince, if we were in Mongolia, you may give order at will. Shaolin Temple is not within Mongolian borders, hence we are not under Your Highness’ jurisdiction.”

Galdan pointed to Commander Ma and said, “He is an imperially appointed official, with him issuing the order to search the Temple should be enough.” He saw how superior Shaolin monks’ martial arts were, plus they had many more people. If a fight broke, the several dozen men on his side would not be their match. Thereupon he added, “You are defying the Imperial Court’s order; that can be considered rebellion.”

“Defying the Imperial Court’s order, Shaolin Temple will not dare,” Hui Cong said, “However, this gentlemen is a military official under the Ping Xi Wang of Yunnan’s banner. Even if Ping Xi Wang’s power grew, it won’t reach Henan province.”

Hui Cong actually was an astute man, it was only when discussing Zen’s truth that he gave no thought to worldly affair. Apart from that, he was quite knowledgeable in other affairs; he was completely different from Cheng Guan who did not understand anything about the outside world.

Chang Qi Lama laughed and said, “This young eminent monk has agreed, why should Fangzhang Dashi use that pretext to stop the search? Could it be that the beautiful woman is not in Hui Ming Chanshi’s room, but actually in … in … hee hee … in Fangzhang Dashi’s meditation room?”

“Amitabha,” Hui Cong said, “Sin, sin. Why would Dashi utter such words?”

Suddenly someone behind Galdan spoke in a delicate voice, “Your Highness, my Shimei was clearly captured by this little monk, quickly tell them to hand her over, otherwise we definitely won’t let this matter drop, we will burn Shaolin Temple to the ground.” It was a female voice, but the one speaking was a man, with sallow complexion and face full of beard.

As soon as Wei Xiaobao heard it, he knew this person was that girl in blue in disguise. She put some yellow wax on her face and stuck some fake beard. He was unable to restrain his ecstasy, “These past several days I was worried because I did not know my wife’s school or sect, I did not know her name or surname. She turned her back on her husband and ran away, where would I go to find her? Now I know that they belong to this Mongolian Prince’s group. Very good, very good. She won’t escape from me.”

Hui Cong also recognized her; he said, “Turns out this is the Miss who came to our Temple and injured people the other day. There was another Miss who was mending her wound in our Temple; she is not coming with Miss this time?”

The girl angrily said, “Afterwards my Shimei was captured and brought to your Temple. That old monk was his accomplice, it was him who defeated my Shimei.” While saying that she pointed to Cheng Guan.

Wei Xiaobao was greatly alarmed; he mused, “Aiyo! Not good! The old monk Cheng Guan cannot lie, this affair will be exposed. What should I do?” Momentarily he was at a loss of what to do.

The girl pointed to Cheng Guan and loudly said, “Old monk, tell me, tell me, am I telling the truth?”

Cheng Guan put his palms together and said, “Please tell us where did the Nu Shizhu, your respected Shimei go? My Shishu was hit by her violent poison, only she has the antidote. Nu Shizhu is infinitely merciful, please beseech your respected Shimei to quickly grant the antidote. Although Hui Ming Shishu’s wisdom is profound, he is free and does not care about life and death, considering life and death as the Nirvana, the Nirvana as life and death, but … ay …”

He was babbling a string of incoherent sentences. Although other people could not comprehend what he was saying, they all knew that the girl was not in the monastery; moreover, Wei Xiaobao was poisoned by her and was looking for her for the antidote, otherwise his life would be difficult to protect. Everyone could see Cheng Guan’s simple appearance, his words were extremely sincere, they all believed he was not lying. They thought, “Even if the woman was indeed hidden in the Temple and the Abbot allow us to search, Shaolin Temple has hundreds of rooms and thousands of residence, how could we search everything in such a short period of time? If we really want to search, most likely we will only invite a rebuke in vain.”

With a sharp voice the girl shouted, “Clearly you have captured and brought my Shimei into the Temple, perhaps you have already killed her. You are evil monks who offend the Heaven and disregard reasons, you must have had destroy her body to leave no trace, naturally we won’t find her.” Toward the end, her anger mixed with anxiety that her voice turned into sobbing.

Galdan nodded, “That makes sense. This … this little monk is not a good person.”

The girl pointed to Wei Xiaobao and cursed, “You are an evil man, that day in the brothel you fooled around with a lot of bad women, when you saw my Shimei’s beauty, you were having an evil thought. It must be because my Shimei was unwilling to … unwilling to come with you that you killed her. If you can go to the brothel, what other bad things you can’t do?”

When Hui Cong heard this, he showed a faint smile, thinking that it was absurd. Cheng Guan did not know what kind of place was a ‘brothel’, he thought it was a place similar to Shaolin Temple’s Jielu Courtyard, Damo Courtyard, or Bodhi Courtyard[4]. He thought, “Xiao Shishu is fearlessly forging ahead, diligently doing good works and practicing Buddhist teachings. This is the ‘forging ahead vigorously boluomi[5]’ of the six paramita. Leading a pious life in a brothel is also very good!”

In his heart, Wei Xiaobao was very anxious; he was afraid she would go into the details and narrate how he deliberately created some trouble.

Suddenly from behind Commander Ma a man stepped forward, cupped his fist and said, “Miss, Xiaoren knows that this Chanshi is practicing strict and refined monastic discipline; he would never set foot in a brothel. I am afraid it was a baseless rumor.”

As soon as Wei Xiaobao saw him, he was delighted. Turned out this man was Yang Yizhi whom he had met in Beijing. He was escorting Wu Yingxiong to Beijing. Presumably Wu Yingxiong had returned to Yunnan and now he came to Henan with Commander Ma. All along he was hanging his head low and stood behind other people, thereupon Wei Xiaobao did not immediately recognize him.

The girl angrily said, “How do you know? Do you know him?”

“Xiaoren knows this young Chanshi,” Yang Yizhi respectfully replied, “Our Heir Apparent also knows him. This young Chanshi has shown enormous kindness toward our Wangye’s [master king] family. Before he left home, he was a Gong-gong in the Imperial Palace. Consequently, there must be no such thing as going to a brothel, or forcing your respected Shimei, and so on. Please Miss understand.”

When the crowd heard him, “Oh!” they exclaimed. They all thought, “If he was a court eunuch, naturally he could not visit a prostitute, even more impossible for him to kidnap a woman and hide her in the Temple.”

---

[1] Transliteration of Sanskrit term, Anuttara-Samyak-Sambodhi - "Obtaining no greater passing over, all pervading perfect awakening" (Courtesy of Ace High).

[2] Referring to the Three Precious Treasures of Buddhism: the Buddha himself, his teaching (Dharma) and his monastic order (Sangha).

[3] Jin Gang – Buddha’s warrior attendant or diamond (or hard metal), hu ti - protect the body, shen gong – divine ability.

[4] In Chinese, the literal translation of the word ‘brothel’ is actually ‘prostitute courtyard’, the exact same word of the other ‘courtyards’. Actually, it can also mean ‘institution’.

[5] From Sanskrit word: paramita, in Buddhism, means to cross over to the other shore. Paramita may also be translated as perfection, perfect realization, or reaching beyond limitation.
According to Mahayana Buddhism, there are six Paramitas:
1. Dana Paramita, the perfection of generosity (布施波羅蜜)
2. Sila Paramita, the perfection of ethics (持戒波羅蜜)
3. Kshanti Paramita, the perfection of patience (忍辱波羅蜜)
4. Virya Paramita, the perfection of joyous effort, vigor / enthusiastic perseverance (精進波羅蜜)
5. Dhyana Paramita, the perfection of concentration (禪定波羅蜜)
6. Prajna Paramita, the perfection of wisdom (智慧波羅蜜)
(Courtesy of Gubrak)

[foxs]

Looking at everybody’s expression, the girl realized that they did not believe her; she grew even more angry. With a shrill voice she said, “How do you know he was a eunuch? If he was a eunuch, why did he say he wanted to take … to take my Shimei as … as his wife? Not only this little monk talked nonsense, that old monk is also oily-mouthed and a smooth talker, they love to take advantage of other people.” While saying that, she pointed her finger at Cheng Guan.

The crowd could see that Cheng Guan was over eighty years old, with a rather dumb expression. Only a while ago they heard him stammering, when he was trying to express his thought with difficulty. It would be almost impossible to find someone more ‘oily-mouthed and smooth talking’ than he was. Hence they did not believe the girl even more. They all thought that because they listened to her one-sided wild fantasy today they had come to Shaolin Temple and made a fool of themselves; they were quite regretful.

Yang Yizhi said, “Miss, you did not know that before he left home, this young Chanshi was very famous; he was the Gui Gong-gong who has put that big treacherous court official Oboi to death. Our Prince was framed by some crafty scoundrels, he was in danger of suffering an unredressed injustice if not for this young Chanshi vigorously explaining the facts in front of His Majesty. This great kindness and great favor so far has not been repaid yet.”

Everybody had heard the name Xiao Guizi who killed Oboi, they all knew that he was Kangxi’s most favorite little eunuch. They could not help but exclaimed, ‘Oh!’ while their faces showed admiration.

Wei Xiaobao laughed and said, “Yang Xiong, long time no see. Is your Heir Apparent well? It was a minor matter of the past, why do you keep mentioning it?”

Yang Yizhi came along to Mount Shaoshi with Commander Ma. Other than Ping Xi Wang’s people, Galdan and Lama Chang Qi’s people did not know his name and surname. Hearing Wei Xiaobao greeted him as ‘Brother Yang’, they had no doubt that they knew each other. They heard Yang Yizhi continued, “Chanshi’s benevolence comes from your heart, being of service to others, you say it was a small matter, but our Wangye is endlessly grateful. Although His Majesty is an enlightened sage, knowing right and wrong, black and white, and would be able to clarify in the end, yet were it not for Chanshi stated the actual truth at the earliest possible time, the twists and turns of this matter might be difficult to say.”

Wei Xiaobao laughed and said, “You are too kind, you are too kind. Your Wangye is also too polite.” But in his heart he said, “I really wish to pull down your traitor-to-China Wangye. It was the Emperor who was the enlightened sage and ascertained the truth on his own; I was only doing a favor without costing me anything, which I had to do anyway. Finally the good karma that day bears the fruit today as this man came out to help me out of trouble.”

Galdan look at him from top to bottom, sizing him up, and then said, “Turns out you are the little eunuch who killed Oboi. Even in Mongolia I have also heard your reputation. Oboi was known as the number one warrior of Manchuria, in that case you did not learn your martial art from Shaolin Temple.”

Wei Xiaobao said with a laugh, “My martial art is extremely lacking, not worth mentioning at all. The number of people who taught me martial art is actually quite a few. This Yang Dage once taught me the move ‘sweeping a thousand army’ and the move ‘flowing water from a high mountain’.” Finished speaking, he stood up and demonstrated the two moves he mentioned. He did not use the slightest bit of force, so others could not see the level of his martial art skill; however, undoubtedly the style was from ‘Mu Family Fist’.

Yang Yizhi said, “It was because Chanshi demonstrated these two moves in front of His Majesty that he understood clearly that our Wangye was framed by a personal enemy.”

The girl’s expression was not as angry as she previously looked. “Yang Dage,” she said, “This little … this man is a eunuch? Has he really shown kindness to Ping Xi Wang mansion?”

“Absolutely,” Yang Yizhi replied, “There are many people in Beijing who knew about this.”

The girl hesitated a little bit, and then she asked Wei Xiaobao, “In that case, you were … you were joking with us, sisters, like that, what is your intention?”

Wei Xiaobao said, “I was not joking, of course I have an intention.” In his heart he said, “My intention is to marry your Meizi, but there are too many people here, of course I cannot say it out loud.”

“What is your intention?” the girl asked.

Wei Xiaobao only showed a faint smile without saying anything. Everybody else thought, “Since he has an intention, naturally it is inconvenient to expose it in the presence of everyone.”

Chang Qi put his palms together and said, “Fangzhang Dashi, Hui Ming Chanshi, we have come here on impulse, please forgive our offense, we are taking our leave now.”

Hui Cong put his palms together to return the propriety and said, “Good guests coming from afar, please enjoy vegetarian dish with us first. However, this Nu Shizhu …” he thought that you disguised yourself as a man and sneaked into the Temple, we did not look into it, and that’s that. But by inviting you for a vegetarian meal, we are inevitably breaking the Temple’s regulation too much.

Chang Qi laughed and said, “Thank you very much, thank you very much! To avoid giving Fangzhang Shixiong too much trouble, all of us won’t eat this vegetarian feast.” Immediately they all bade their farewell and walked out. The Abbot and Wei Xiaobao, Cheng Guan and the other walked them out to the mountain gate.

Suddenly they heard the sound of horses’ hooves, about a dozen or so riders galloped- toward them. When they were near, it could be seen that the riders were wearing Imperial Bodyguards’ uniform, altogether there were sixteen men. Before they even reached the Temple, all sixteen of them stopped and dismounted the horses, and walked toward the Temple in formation. The two foremost men were none other than Zhang Kangnian and Zhao Qixian.

As soon as Zhang Kangnian saw Wei Xiaobao, he called out loudly, “Du … Du … Daren, are you, Senior well?” He was going to call ‘Dutong [commander] Daren’, but seeing Wei Xiaobao was wearing monk robe, he had no choice but to call vaguely. Immediately the sixteen of them kneeled down to pay their respect to Wei Xiaobao.

Wei Xiaobao was delighted. “Gentlemen, please rise,” he said, “No need to be overly courteous. I have been looking forward to seeing you daily.”

Galdan and the others noticed that these sixteen men were imperial bodyguards whose pin rank[1] was not low, yet they were that respectful toward Wei Xiaobao. They all thought, “This little monk indeed has some background.”

According to Qing military system, commanders were of regular second pin rank, first-class imperial bodyguards were of regular third pin rank, and the second-class imperial bodyguards were of regular fourth pin rank. Although compared to army commanders the official rank of Zhang Kangnian and the others was quite low, they were the Emperor’s personal bodyguards, they did not have any regard toward ‘outside’ military officials. They only nodded slightly toward Commander Ma as a way of greeting, and then were back showing their eager attention to Wei Xiaobao.

Seeing how these Imperial Bodyguards doing everything they could to please Wei Xiaobao while turning a blind eye to everybody else, Galdan was angry. “Humph,” he snorted, and said, “Let’s go, I can’t bear to see this kind of attitude.” His party cupped their hands toward Abbot Hui Cong and then walked down the mountain.

Wei Xiaobao invited the Imperial Bodyguards to enter the Temple. Zhang Kangnian walked beside him and said in a low voice, “His Majesty has a secret edict.” Wei Xiaobao nodded.

When they entered the Hall of Great Strength, Zhang Kangnian took out the Imperial Edict and read it out loud; it was only several sentences of official announcement: the Emperor bestowed five thousand taels to Shaolin Temple, to build more monks’ residence, to repair the gilded image of Buddha, and also to confer Wei Xiaobao the title of ‘Fu Guo Feng Sheng Chanshi’ [Dhyana Master Revered Sage Supporter of the Country]. Hui Cong and Wei Xiaobao kowtowed to express their gratitude.

Zhang Kangnian said, “His Majesty’s order: for ‘Fu Guo Feng Sheng Chanshi’ to get ready to set on a journey, your destination will be Mount Wutai.”

Wei Xiaobao had already anticipated this matter; he bowed to comply and said, “Your servant obeys the Emperor’s decree.”

After they all had been served tea, Wei Xiaobao invited Zhang Kangnian and Zhao Qixian, two people toward his own meditation room to chat. From his pocket Zhang Kangnian produced a secret imperial edict, which he presented with both hands while saying, “His Majesty has another decree.”

Wei Xiaobao kneeled down and kowtowed, and received the edict with both hands. Seeing that it was sealed with stamped lacquer wax, he thought, “I wonder what instruction His Majesty might have. The letters written on the Imperial Edict may recognize me, but I don’t recognize them. Since it is secret, I am not supposed to let Zhang and Zhao to know, I’d better ask Fangzhang Shixiong for guidance. I am sure he won’t reveal the secret.”

Thereupon, carrying the secret edict, he went to Hui Cong’s meditation room and said, “Fangzhang Shixiong, His Majesty has a secret order for me, I am asking you to give me directions.” Breaking the secret edict’s seal, he saw a large sheet of fine writing paper. Upon spreading it out, he saw four drawings.

The first drawing depicted five mountain peaks. Wei Xiaobao recognized it as Mount Wutai. On the southern peak there was a drawing of a temple, with the caption ‘Qing Liang Si’ three characters. Wei Xiaobao has stayed in Qingliang Temple for many days, and was somewhat familiar with these three characters. If the characters were written someplace else, he would never recognize them; but written on a temple, it could be considered meeting an acquaintance.

The second drawing depicted a little monk entering a temple, written above the temple also the three characters ‘Qing Liang Si’. The little monk was followed by a group of monks, above these monks’ heads there were five characters ‘Shao Lin Si He Shang’ [monks of Shaolin Temple]. Wei Xiaobao recognized the first three characters. Although he did not know the last two characters ‘he shang’, he could guess what they mean.

The setting on the third drawing was the Hall of Great Strength, where the little monk sat in the middle, happy and grinning, his face looked a lot like Wei Xiaobao, but he was wearing red kasaya, the apparel of an abbot. Next to him were many monks standing up. Wei Xiaobao realized that the little monk in the picture looked a lot like him, the more he looked, the more he was fascinated by it, unconsciously he broke into laughter.

The fourth drawing showed the little monk was kneeling on the ground, in front of a middle-aged monk. The middle-aged monk looked thin, it must be the Emperor Shunzhi who assumed the Buddhist name Xing Chi after leaving home.

Other than these four drawings, there were no other characters written on the secret edict. Turned out Kangxi was very adept at painting; knowing that Wei Xiaobao’s literacy was limited, he put the imperial decree in paintings. These four drawings could not be clearer, he wanted Wei Xiaobao to go to the Qing Liang Temple to be the head administrator and serve the Old Emperor.

At first Wei Xiaobao found it amusing, but his delight quickly disappeared; he groaned inwardly, “It’s alright for me to be a little monk, but now he wants me to be an old monk; that’s very bad!”

Hui Cong smiled and said, “Congratulations Shidi, His Majesty is sending you to be the head monk of Qingliang Temple. Qingliang Temple is a distinguished ancient temple, it was established during the reign of Emperor Xiao Wen of Northern Wei Dynasty, a lot earlier than Shaolin Temple. Being the head of a large monastery, Shidi will have great opportunity to proclaim Buddhist teachings, helping all living beings to cross over and help our religion to flourish.”

Wei Xiaobao shook his head and said with a forced smile, “I can’t be a head administrator of a temple, I will definitely make ridiculous mistake and will collapse in confusion.”

Hui Cong said, “It is clear from the drawing in the imperial edict that Shidi is to lead a group of our Temple’s monks to accompany you going there. Shidi may choose whoever you want. Everybody is your younger generation whom you know well, they will support you with all their hearts, absolutely no one will let you be careless. Shidi may set your heart at ease.”

Wei Xiaobao was staring blankly for half a day before it suddenly dawned on him: the young emperor had meticulously planned everything. When he was sent to Shaolin Temple to be a monk, the Emperor had already arranged today’s matter. The Emperor let him live in Shaolin Temple for about half a year, so that he could get to know the monks well, in order for him to select desirable monks to accompany him to Qingliang Temple. Since the Old Emperor had left home, certainly he did not want to have any Imperial Bodyguards to guard him; perhaps he would even leave and henceforth could not be found anymore.

Shaolin monks had outstanding martial art, plus it was Wei Xiaobao who personally led them, they would be a lot more dependable than the officers of Imperial Bodyguards. Besides, this matter was a huge secret, if the Emperor sent the officers and men of the Imperial Bodyguards to guard an old monk on Mount Wutai, it would be bound to create sensation and then the whole world would know. There must be someone in the Imperial Bodyguards who would recognize the Old Emperor. To have a Shaolin monk entering Qingliang Temple to be the head monk was actually very ordinary. The former head monk of Qingliang Temple, Cheng Guang, was one of Shaolin Temple’s Eighteen Luohan anyway.

Wei Xiaobao also thought, “If Xiao Huangdi [young emperor] sent me to be a monk at the Qingliang Temple, it would be too conspicuous, but by coming to Shaolin Temple first and then take a turn, nobody will suspect anything.” Thinking to this point, he could not help but was full of admiration to Kangxi’s planning ability.

Returning to his meditation room, he took out six thousand taels and instructed Zhang Kangnian to distribute the money to the Imperial Bodyguards. Zhang and Zhao, two people did not expect after becoming a monk Wei Xiaobao was still this generous; they were pleasantly surprised. “Since ancient times,” they praised, “There has never been any monk who gives money to the Imperial Bodyguards, except you, Wei Daren, one person. It is indeed unprecedented and will never be duplicated. There has never been a person from the ancient time, there will never be a person from the future generation.”

Wei Xiaobao laughed and said, “There has never been a monk from the ancient time, there will never be a monk from the future generation.”

Zhang Kangnian lowered his voice and said, “Wei Daren, we do not dare to ask what business His Majesty is sending you to attend to, but whatever it is, please do not hesitate to give your orders. Handling matters for you is the same as handling matters for His Majesty; all of us will strive to do our best all the same.”

Zhao Qixian said, “If Wei Daren needs to do something but for the time being is not convenient to do, perhaps we can strive a little and make insignificant contribution. For instance … for instance, if Wei Daren needs to fetch a martial art manual from Shaolin Temple, we can set the monastery on fire, so that in the confusion, Wei Daren may seize the opportunity to make your move.”

Zhang Kangnian cackled, and then said in a low voice, “That’s right, this is called ‘fishing in troubled water’.”

Wei Xiaobao was startled, but understood immediately, “Right, they must be thinking that there must be a reason the Emperor sent me to Shaolin Temple to be a monk. Plus this time they came here to deliver a secret order without knowing what’s written inside. They knew the Emperor is fond of martial art; he sent me to be a monk in Shaolin Temple, naturally it is to steal a treasured martial art manual from the Temple.” He chuckled, and then also said in a low voice, “Gentlemen, don’t worry! This … I have already succeeded.”

Zhang and Zhao, two people were delighted, they bowed and paid their respect together, saying, “His Majesty’s flood of good fortune fills the heavens, Wei Daren is astute, capable and experienced. Congratulations for setting up this great merit.”

Zhao Qixian said, “Do you want us to smuggle it out for you? If the monks get suspicious, they might search Wei Daren’s clothes.”

Wei Xiaobao laughed and said, “That’s not necessary. Go back to His Majesty, report to him that his servant Wei Xiaobao has solemnly received the imperial edict, and will remember the drawings firmly in my heart. I will handle this matter diligently; His Majesty may set his heart at ease.”

“Yes,” the two people replied. Zhao Qixian thought for a moment, he understood, “Turns out this martial art manual is a diagram. Wei Daren looked at it and remembers the drawings firmly in your heart,” he said.

Zhang Kangnian also saw the truth, “That’s even better,” he said, “If the treasured manual was stolen, the monks of Temple would naturally find out, in the end … in the end the outcome would be worse. By memorizing it, the deities will not know, the ghosts will not realize. Fortunately by nature Wei Daren is extremely intelligent; if you are blunt like me, you won’t remember anything.”

Realizing that these two misunderstood the drawings he was talking about as Shaolin Temple’s martial art diagram, Wei Xiaobao was secretly amused. “Zhang Xiong need not be too modest,” he said, “By staying in the Temple and looking at it slowly, one or two days may be inadequate, but after several months I can finally remember everything.”

The two of them expressed their agreement together; they both thought that after living in the Temple for more than half a year, you must have memorized not a few of Shaolin Pai’s martial art manuals.

They took their leave. Wei Xiaobao remembered something; he asked, “The group of men you met outside the mountain gate just now, do you happen to know their background?”

“We don’t,” Zhang and Zhao replied.

“Quickly go and investigate for me,” Wei Xiaobao said, “That group of people came to Shaolin Temple sneakily, evidently they also want to steal treasured martial art manuals from the Temple. That troop commander in particular, I wonder whom he is working for. He is acting as an imperially appointed official, yet has the audacity to spoil His Majesty’s important matter; it is indeed treason and heresy, he wants to rebel intentionally. Go and investigate what kind of person is the man behind this, you will render an enormous service.”

“That’s easy,” the two of them delightedly said, “They have not gone down the mountain too long, we will definitely able to catch up with them. That troop commander has a name and a surname, we will find out as soon as we investigate.”

Wei Xiaobao knew perfectly well that that Commander Ma was Wu Sangui’s subordinate, yet deliberately entrap him, pretending that he did not know his background, letting the Imperial Bodyguards to investigate and report to the Emperor so that they may take the credit. It would be a lot better compared to if he brought the false charge himself.

Wei Xiaobao added, “With this group of people, there is a young woman disguised herself as a man. They are looking for another young girl, sixteen, seventeen years old, with beautiful face. These two girls are heavily involved in this big rebellion conspiracy. You try to verify in detail these two girls’ names and family background. After finding out, report to me in a sealed envelope.”

By saying those things, naturally he was trying to use official authority for private interests. He was sending the Emperor’s personal bodyguards to trace his own sweetheart. They were seeking after monetary reward, they would undoubtedly make every effort to handle this matter. When the Imperial Bodyguards wanted to investigate a case, the government officials all over the world would follow their orders by sending their people to investigate. With this kind of ‘pass like thunder and move like the wind’ investigation, how can there be any information they would not be able to find?

Zhang and Zhao, two people patted their chests, guaranteeing that they would investigate until the truth comes to light. They promised to repay Wei Daren’s graciousness, his kindness in recognizing their worth and employing them, his concern for their country, and for the generous reward he bestowed to them.

---

[1] During the Qing Dynasty, the system of nine pǐn-ranks (九品中正制/九品官人法) was used. Some of the pǐn-ranks were further divided into zhèng (正; regular), cóng (從; deputy), shàng (上; upper) and xià (下; lower) grades. Therefore in theory, the whole classification system actually holds more than eighteen grades (等; děng). In reality the subdivisions were customized in specific central and local departments; for instance, one department can consist of twelve ranks whereas another composed of sixteen.
1a
1b ProvincinalCommander (提督), Commander-in-Chief (都统)
2a Regional Commander (总兵), Vice Commander-in-Chief (副都统)
2b Regional Vice-Commander (副将)
3a Administrator (参将), First Grade Bodyguards (一等侍卫) or Bodyguards Supervisors (侍卫领班)
3b Brigade Commander (游击)
4a Vice Brigade Commander (都司), Second Grade Bodyguards (二等侍卫)
5a Commandant (守备)
6a Company Commander (千总)
7a Squad Leader (把总)
8a Detached Fiscal Commissioner

There are some confusion on a Commander's (都统) pin-rank which I can't elaborate without giving a lot of spoiler. (Courtesy of Ace High)

[foxs]

Chapter 24 - The river of love dries up entirely from a thousand calamities, the sea of bitterness cannot be used to measure compassion.
(Translated by Foxs)

LuDingJi-24.jpg

Several dozen buckets of cold water, one after another, were splashed onto the three of them. It happened so quickly that not only the three of them did not have time to light the fire to burn themselves, even if they did, the fire would be quickly extinguished by the pouring of the water.

[foxs]

After the Imperial Bodyguards left, Wei Xiaobao went to see the Abbot, telling him that since he had the Emperor’s order, he had to start the journey to Qingliang Temple the next day.

“So be it,” Abbot Hui Cong said, “Shidi has the innate intelligence, you have an amazing comprehension of Buddhist truth. It’s a pity that the days of our meeting are not many and now we have to part, we cannot learn from each other too much, to live the Buddhist law together. I suppose our destiny has brought us to this point of life. I wonder which fellow monks Shidi wants to take with you?”

“I want Head of Bo’re Hall Cheng Guan Shizhi, and the eighteen masters of Luohan Hall,” Wei Xiaobao replied. In addition, he also named more than a dozen more monks that he wanted to go with him, altogether there were thirty-six names.

Hui Cong did not have any objection, he summoned these thirty-six Shaolin monks, and told them that Hui Ming Chanshi was going to take over the head administrator position of the Qingliang Temple on Mount Wutai, he exhorted them to accompany him, to protect the Buddhist teaching and maintain orders, to obey Hui Ming Chanshi’s instruction, and not to go against him.

Early in the morning the next day, accompanied by thirty-six monks, Wei Xiaobao took his leave from the Abbot and the others. When they reach the foot of the mountain, he went alone to see Shuang’er.

Shuang’er had been boarding at a commoner’s home, and had not seen him for more than half a year. At the first glance, she was both surprised and happy. Although she had heard from Zhang Kangnian that her master was becoming a monk in Shaolin Temple, and had cried for him countless times, when with her own eyes she saw his bald head and his monk robe, she could not bear not to cry again.

Wei Xiaobao laughed and said, “Good Shuang’er, why are you crying? You are upset because I have not come to visit you these many days, aren’t you?”

“No … it’s not that,” Shuang’er replied, “You … you … Xianggong has left home …”

Wei Xiaobao pulled her right hand and lifted it up; he gently kissed the back of her hand. He laughed and said, “Silly girl, Xianggong did not become a monk for real.” Shuang’er was happy and bashful at the same time, even her ears had turned red.

Wei Xiaobao examined her face carefully; he noticed that she looked wan and sallow, she looked a lit thinner, but she had grown a bit taller, bringing out the grown-up gracefulness in her, she looked even more delicate and pretty. Wei Xiaobao smiled and said, “Did you lose weight? You were thinking about me every day, weren’t you?” Shuang’er blushed even deeper. She wanted to shake her head, but she lowered her head slowly instead.

“Alright,” Wei Xiaobao said, “Quickly change into your boy’s clothes and come with me.” Shuang’er was greatly delighted. Without asking any question she immediately changed into men’s clothing and disguised herself as a young attendant.

Their journey does not need to be narrated. One day they arrived at the foot of Mount Wutai. They were just about to climb the mountain when they saw four monks coming down to meet them. The old monk at the front put his palms together and asked, “Are you all Shifus from Shaolin Temple?”

Wei Xiaobao nodded. The old monk said, “And I suppose you are the Chanshi whose Buddhist title is Hui at the top and Ming at the bottom?” Wei Xiaobao nodded again.

The four monks dropped down on their knees immediately and said, “Knowing that Chanshi is coming to administer Qingliang, the monks cannot contain our happiness and have been waiting at the foot of the mountain for many days.”

Since Cheng Guang had returned to Shaolin Temple, Qingliang Temple was administered by the old monk Fa Sheng. Kangxi had separately dispatch people to proclaim a secret imperial decree to Fa Sheng, transferring him to Ciyun Temple [lit. compassionate cloud] in Chang’an [modern day Xi’an] to be the head administrator there. He was to leave as soon as the Shaolin monks arrived. Ciyun Temple of Chang’an was a lot bigger than Qingliang Temple. Fa Sheng was very happy, he sent these four monks to wait at the foot of Mount Wutai.

When Wei Xiaobao and his party arrived at Qingliang Temple, Fa Sheng immediately performed the ceremony of handing over the administrator duty. All the monks came to pay their respect, only Yulin, Xing Chi and Xing Dian, three monks did not personally come. Yulin only wrote a short letter to pay their respect to the new head monk.

Fa Sheng went down the mountain the next day, heading west toward Chang’an. Now Wei Xiaobao was officially the head of Qingliang Temple. Fortunately there were Cheng Guan and the other monks who at any time gave him directions on all kinds of ceremonial protocol and compass and set square. As a little monk assuming the role of the Abbot, he must emulate the manner of an abbot, and must not make any mistake.

When Wei Xiaobao and Shuang’er drove off the enemies coming to attack Qingliang Temple the other day, they saved the lives of the monks in the Temple, all the monks knew it in their hearts. Now that he suddenly left home to become a monk, and came to Qingliang Temple to be the head monk, they were all baffled, yet since he had shown kindness to their Temple, everybody showed their gratitude by serving him. Wei Xiaobao ordered Shuang’er to live in a small hut outside the Temple, so that she would be just a shout away.

Since the most important mission for him in coming to be the head administrator of Qingliang Temple was to thoroughly protect the Old Emperor, he inquired from the monk on duty and found out that Yulin, Xing Chi and Xing Dian, three monks still lived in a small vihara behind the mountain. He did not go to disturb them, only after discussing it over with Cheng Xin Dashi, he sent people to separately build four thatched hut about half a li on the east, west, south and north of the vihara, and assigned eight Shaolin monks to take turn on guard duty in the thatched huts.

All things were settled, the only thing he had to do was painstakingly waiting for Zhang Kangnian and Zhao Qixian’s letter, he was dying to know that girl in green’s name and surname, and her background. Yet after waiting for several months unexpectedly there was no news at all. In his loneliness, he sparred with Cheng Guan, treated the old monk as ‘that female benefactor’. Occasionally he would slip out to the little cottage to talk and joke with Shuang’er, to stroke her small hands. Sometimes he thought, “I have taken Hong Jiaozhu’s ‘leopard embryo tendon altering pill’. If within a year I did not deliver a copy of sutra to the Divine Dragon Island, the poison might flare-up then it won’t be fun. Come to think about it, only several months left. If I turn into an old and stupid man, I would look like Cheng Guan Shizhi. And then when that green-clothed wife of mine sees me, she would call me the ‘oily-mouthed and smooth talker old monk’. Worse yet, she would cut a piece of green cloth from her skirt and have me wear it on my head as a hat, that won’t be good at all!”[1]

One day he was overcome with boredom, so he went alone wandering about aimlessly on Mount Wutai; the only thing in his mind was that girl in green. He arrived at the bank of a mountain creek, and saw a weeping willow continuously swaying in the wind. “If this willow tree is that green-clothed wife of mine, naturally laozi would not show any politeness, I would step forward and hug her. She would definitely be unwilling, and use Kunlun Pai’s move ‘thousand rocks vying to be the most beautiful’, sending me a succession of palm strikes. That’s nothing, laozi will use the move ‘going begging from door to door’, to ward off her strike with poise. Cheng Guan Shizhi says that this move should be executed in such a way that the heavy will seem light, with the poise of famous, orthodox martial art school. Laozi lifts heavy stuff as heavy and light stuffs as light, why do I care about damn famous or secretive, orthodox or heretical sect? Once I launch this move, I will follow it up with ‘holding the pearl of wisdom’; left hand grabs her left hand, right hand grabs her right hand, and firmly hold on to her, even if my head is chopped, I won’t let her go …”

He was happily fantasizing, and thus his hands moved in the style he was thinking about, ‘puff, puff’, he grabbed two willow branches, one on each hand, and using all his strength he firmly hold on to the branches.

Suddenly he heard a deep and gruff voice of a man, saying, “Look at this little monk putting an act!”

Wei Xiaobao was startled; when he looked up, he saw three lamas wearing red clothes. They were walking toward him while gesticulating, chatting and laughing. Wei Xiaobao blushed, in that instant he thought that his heart’s content had been seen by those lamas. The Grand Abbot of majestic Qingliang Temple at a desolate, uninhabited part of the mountain was thinking of grabbing a beautiful girl, in all honesty it was too embarrassing. He turned around and left at once.

When he rounded a bend, he saw several more lamas walking straight toward him. There were so many temples of Tibetan Buddhism on Mount Wutai, Wei Xiaobao gave them no thought. Only because of what happened just now he was unwilling to meet with them. Turning his head around, he was pretending to enjoy the scenery, letting those lamas to pass behind him.

He heard one of the lamas said, “The order from above says that no matter what we must climb up Mount Wutai before wushi hour [between 11am-1pm]; it sounds so urgent. But there is nothing fun to do on Mount Wutai, could it be only a joke?”

Another lama said, “Our superior has made this arrangement, it must be for a reason. You just hate to part with that Datong town’s girl, don’t you?”

Wei Xiaobao took no notice; on the contrary, he had a favorable impression on them, he thought, “Those lamas drink wine and stroll around the pleasure house, at least they are not hypocrites. If laozi really want to leave home, I want to be a lama, not a monk.”

Back at Qingliang Temple, he saw Cheng Tong was waiting at the mountain gate. As soon as he saw Wei Xiaobao, immediately he met him and said in a low voice, “Shishu, I think something is going on.”

Looking at his serious expression, Wei Xiaobao hastily asked, “What happened?”

Cheng Tong beckoned, asking him to follow him along several stone steps toward a small peak at the side of the Temple. Wei Xiaobao took a glance, and saw on the south side there were countless yellow dots all around. He focused his eyes and saw that the spots were actually lamas wearing yellow robes. If not a thousand, there were at least nine hundreds of them, forming groups of three to five, scattered around the bushes and mountain rocks.

Wei Xiaobao jumped in fright. “That many lamas!” he said, “What are they doing?”

Cheng Tong pointed to the west and said, “There are some more over there.”

Wei Xiaobao quickly looked to the west. Sure enough, he saw thousands of lamas. They were either standing or sitting in groups. The sun was shining from east to west, white light flickered, those lamas were all bringing weapons. Wei Xiaobao was even more shocked. “They are carrying weapons,” he said, “Could it be … could it be …” he looked at Cheng Tong.

Cheng Tong slowly nodded and said, “Shizhi’s guess is: it looks that way.”

Wei Xiaobao turned his gaze to the north and then to the east; each sides had several hundreds lamas. When he looked more carefully, he noticed that in each group of lamas, there was one wearing deeper yellow kasaya; those must be the leaders. “His granny,” Wei Xiaobao swore, “There must be at least four, five thousand men.”

Cheng Tong said, “One hundred twenty five leaders, altogether there are three thousand two hundred and eighty lamas.”

“Good for you,” Wei Xiaobao praised, “How did you count that clearly?”

“What should we do?” Cheng Tong asked.

Wei Xiaobao did not answer. Meeting difficulty face-to-face, lying and deceiving, slipping away from danger, Wei Xiaobao was an expert in all those things. But now the enemy had assembled more than three thousand men, surrounding them from every direction; evidently, it was the result of meticulous planning. As for how to handle them, he did not have the slightest idea. Hearing Cheng Tong’s question, he asked back, “What should we do?”

Cheng Tong said, “It seems to me that the enemy’s intention is to snatch away Xing Chi Dashi. Most likely they are waiting for the darkness, and then they will launch a four-way attack.”

“Why are they waiting for the darkness?” Wei Xiaobao asked.

Cheng Tong replied, “On Mount Wutai, the yellow monasteries of the lamas are always in good relationship with our green Central Plains’ monasteries. Our green temples have many monasteries and many monks: the ten big monasteries on the platform’s peaks, the big monasteries outside the platform[2]. Although the lamas of yellow monasteries are overbearing, they won’t dare to push around. If they attack in bright day light, it will undoubtedly give rise to all green monasteries’ support.”

“In that case we’d better send people out immediately to notify the administrators of all the green monasteries,” Wei Xiaobao said, “Ask them to send great number of monks, we will fight these lamas to the death. Tell them also: Monks of Mount Wutai to arm ourselves, the monks of green monasteries are in war with the lamas.”

Cheng Tong shook his head and said, “About 80-90% of the monks of green monasteries of Mount Wutai do not know martial art. Those who do, their skill are only so-so, I haven’t heard about anybody with superior skill.”

“So they are not willing to lend a hand?” Wei Xiaobao asked.

“I don’t believe anybody will be unwilling,” Cheng Tong said, “But I am afraid that they will only deliver their lives in vain.”

Wei Xiaobao said, “Are you telling me that we just surrender like that?” His fighting spirit was not always strong, whenever he thought that he would not be able to defeat the opponent, he would immediately think about surrendering.

“Whether we are surrendering or not, it’s not important,” Cheng Tong said, “But Xing Chi Dashi will undoubtedly be captured by them.”

Wei Xiaobao carefully considered, “I wonder if Shaolin monks know the real status of Xing Chi Dashi.” Thereupon he asked, “They carried out a large-scale operation to capture Xing Chi Dashi previously, in the end, what was their intention? Several months ago they had come here once, it was fortunate enough that several good friends scared them off that they retreated. This time their number is actually much greater.”

Cheng Tong hesitatingly said, “Xing Chi Dashi must be a person with a long history behind him. If he is not involved in the prosperity and decline of the Wulin world of Central Plains, then he must have a significant correlation with the struggle between the green and yellow monasteries. Cheng Xin Shixiong has never mentioned anything about the affairs of the Central Plains. Since Shishu does not know about it, much less we.”

Wei Xiaobao remembered that he had with him the imperial note written with the Emperor’s personal handwriting; he could dispatch civil and military officials. He said, “The matter at hand is urgent, although our Shaolin monks’ martial art skill is superior, the few are no match for the many. How can our thirty seven monks fight more than three thousand lamas? I must go down the mountain to seek for help.”

“I am afraid distant water cannot quench nearby fire,” Cheng Tong said.

“Then we escort Xing Chi Dashi to break through their encirclement,” Wei Xiaobao said.

Cheng Tong nodded. “Looks like that’s the only way,” he said, “It’s impossible for our thirty seven Shaolin monks plus Shishu’s attendant to ward off more than three thousand lamas; but to rush through a gap in their midst is actually not too difficult.”

“My only fear is that Xing Chi Dashi and his Shifu Yulin Dashi are not willing,” Wei Xiaobao said, “They said life and death are just the same, escape or not does not make any difference.”

Cheng Tong frowned and said, “For that, we must ask Shishu to persuade.”

Wei Xiaobao shook his head and said, “Persuading Xing Chi Dashi, I can still think of a way, but persuading that old monk Yulin, laozi admit defeat. It is called ‘the cat pulling a tortoise’, there’s nowhere I can put my mouth at.”

---

[1] ‘Wearing green hat’ is an expression about a husband whose wife is having an extra-marital affair.

[2] Reminder: Mount Wutai literally means ‘five platforms’.

[foxs]

Looking down, he saw the lamas were scattered everywhere, seemingly in disorder and at random, but they were actually evenly distributed; the pathways up the mountain, down the mountain, were all packed with people. As soon as it was dark, these three thousand lamas would swarm up, the monks of Qingliang Temple could only cry out, “Buddha have mercy.”

“Damn it,” he mused, “Why did I become a monk? If I was a lama, won’t I be joyfully satisfied right now, without the slightest bit of load on my mind? Not to mention eating meat and strolling the pleasure house in normal time.”

As soon as he thought about ‘strolling the pleasure house’, it was as if a divine light flashing in his mind, he had an idea. Immediately he calmed down and said, “I am going back to my meditation room to have some damn sleep.” Cheng Tong was stunned; he stared at him with eyes open wide. Wei Xiaobao ignored him, without saying anything he went down the peak and returned to the Temple into his room.

Not too long afterwards, Cheng Xin, Cheng Guan, Cheng Guang and Cheng Tong, four monks came to see him. Wei Xiaobao let the four of them into his room. He noticed that all four of them had alarmed and frightened expression. He stretched and yawned, before languidly asked, “Gentlemen, what is it?”

Cheng Xin said, “The lamas have gathered down the mountain, obviously they have ill-intention toward our Temple, I wish to hear Fangzhang Shishu’s [abbot martial uncle] plan on how to deal with them.”

“I have thought about it for half a day,” Wei Xiaobao said, “And have not come up with any good plan; therefore, I decided to go to sleep. We are all doomed anyway, we’d better resign to adversity. The blade comes, the neck receives. Other people’s blades chop down, we use our necks to meet them head on, we need to see whether their blades are sharp enough to chop into our necks.”

Cheng Xin and the others, three monks, knew that he was blathering nonsense, but Cheng Guan thought he was serious; he said, “Those lamas’ blades look really sharp, I don’t think our necks can withstand. Shishu, those who have left homes stand aloof from worldly affairs, resign ourselves to adversity; that is actually the truth. But ‘the blade comes, the neck receives’ is a bit too much. In the past, even Damo Zushi [ancestor master] did not teach us to suffer the blade without fighting back. Otherwise, why would we learn martial art?”

Wei Xiaobao nodded, “So in Cheng Guan Shizhi’s opinion, ‘the blade comes, the neck receives’ is incorrect?” he asked.

“It is,” Cheng Guan replied, “But if ‘the fist comes, the chest receives; the kick comes, the abdomen receives’, that’s still alright.” His internal energy was profound, when the opponent punched or kicked, he did not need to fight back, all he needed to do was to direct his internal strength, and the opponent’s fist or foot would bounce back.

Wei Xiaobao said, “Those lamas are carrying jiedao and chanzhang[1]; I wonder if there is a way for us to ward them off without using any weapon?”

Cheng Guan was taken aback. “I am afraid those lamas won’t listen to reason,” he said, “Asking them to lay down the butcher knife is not a ‘dawn to dusk’ type of merit.”

“That’s difficult,” Wei Xiaobao said, “I wonder what excellent plan four Shizhi might have.”

Cheng Xin said, “The only plan for now is that for everybody to protect Yulin, Xing Chi, Xing Dian, three men, and rush out by exploiting a loophole. Their only target is to capture Xing Chi Dashi, the rest of the monks in the Temple do not know martial art, surely those lamas will not harm them.”

“Altright,” Wei Xiaobao said, “Let’s go talk to those three old monks.” Leading the four monks, he went to the small vihara at the back of the mountain.

A young apprentice monk announced their arrival. As Yulin and the others heard that the head monk had arrived, they went out the door to receive them. When they saw him, Yulin, Xing Chi and Xing Dian were greatly surprised. The three monks only heard that the new head monk Hui Ming Chanshi was Shaolin Temple’s Abbot Hui Cong’s martial brother, a very young eminent monk, but they did not expect it to be him. Yulin and Xing Chi immediately understood that it must be the Emperor who arranged all these, with the purpose of protecting his father.

Buddhist’s customs was very strict, the head monk was the master of the monastery, Yulin and the others immediately paid their respect. Wei Xiaobao respectfully returned the propriety, and then they all went into the meditation room together. Yulin invited him to sit on the middle putuan[2], while the remaining monks stood on either side.

Wei Xiaobao was very happy in his heart, “Laozi sits in the middle, the Old Emperor stands at the side to wait upon me; even the young emperor does not have this kind of awe-inspiring authority.” Trying hard to suppress his smiling face, he said, “Yulin Dashi, Xing Chi Dashi, please sit down.” Yulin and Xing Chi sat down.

Yulin said, “Fangzhang Dashi is the head monk of Qingliang, for us Xiao Seng [little monk] to pay our respect to our superior, Fangzhang has to toil your honorable self to personally pay a visit, indeed our hearts are disturbed.”

“You are too kind,” Wei Xiaobao said, “Xiao Na [little cassock] knew that the three of you did not like others to disturb you, for this reason I have not come to see you thus far. If not for today we have an important matter, Xiao Na would still not come here.” He often heard old monks referring to themselves as Lao Na [old cassock]; thinking that since he was young, he should refer to himself as Xiao Na. The other monks heard him having a weird idea, fabricating a way to refer to himself, they were secretly amused.

“Yes,” Yulin said; but he did not ask what the important matter was.

“Cheng Guang Shizhi,” Wei Xiaobao said, “Would you please tell the three gentlemen?”
Yulin knew that the knew head monk had a Buddhist title ‘Hui Ming’, and he knew that in Shaolin Temple, the ‘Hui’ generation was one generation higher than the ‘Cheng’ generation, yet he was still stunned to see that this young, cunning and glib monk addressed the former head monk of their temple, the stately and benevolent, virtuous old monk as ‘martial nephew’.

Cheng Guang respectfully complied, and then explained the situation of their temple, how it had been heavily besieged by several thousand of lamas. Yulin closed his eyes to think for half a day; finally he opened his eyes and asked, “May I ask Fangzhang Dashi, what is your plan to deal with it?”

Wei Xiaobao said, “These lamas are either sitting down or standing up, they are merely enjoying the scenery, they have no other intention. The scenery here is clear and elegant, they come here on scenic tour [orig. roaming the mountain playing (on) the water], that is all.”

Xing Dian could not bear not to speak up, “If they are enjoying the beauty of nature, they can’t be surrounding our Temple, and did not leave for several hours. They must be here to capture Xing Chi Shixiong.”

Wei Xiaobao said, “Xiao Na thought that all the green and yellow temples under the heavens are disciples and family of our Buddha, if they wanted to invite Xing Chi Dashi, it must be because they are in admiration the three Dashi’s profound Dharma [the teachings of Buddha], and thus are inviting you to go to lama monastery to preach the sutra. Perhaps those lamas admire our Central Earth’s Dharma, perhaps they don’t want to be lamas anymore but to be monks; won’t that be an excellent opportunity?”

Xing Dian repeatedly shook his head, “Maybe not, maybe not,” he said.

“Fangzhang Shishu,” Cheng Guan said, “If that’s the case, why are they bringing weapons?”

Wei Xiaobao put his palms together and said, “They brought chanzhang and jiedao, looking so fierce and imposing, perhaps they want to kill the head of our Temple’s monks. Buddha said, ‘If I don’t go to hell, who would go to hell?’ We will have the attitude ‘the blade comes, the neck receives’, this is called ‘if I don’t let others chop my head, who would be chopped by others?’. No life no perishes, no disgrace no purity. When there’s life, there will be death, when there’s head, there will be beheading. Buddha has three virtues: great determination, great wisdom, great sorrow. The lamas came with blades, we do not hear we do not see, we do not care we do not know. This is the great determination. They raise their blade to chop, we regard their blades as emptiness, the emptiness as the blades. This is the great wisdom. The blades chop down, chopping all our bald heads off, everybody perishes. This is the great sorrow.” He had lived in monasteries for a long time, and had heard quite a lot of Buddhist sutra being preached, thereupon he talked nonsense unguardedly.

“Fangzhang Shishu,” Cheng Guan said, “I am afraid the ‘sorrow’ of the Great Sorrow refers to merciful sorrow, not grieving sorrow.”

Wei Xiaobao smiled and said, “Shizhi is right. Remember that our Buddha cut his own flesh to feed a hawk, giving his own life to raise a tiger; it was indeed great compassion and great sorrow. Although those lamas are fierce and uncontrollable, compared to vicious hawk and fierce tiger they are somewhat better. If we give our lives for the sake of those wicked lamas, we are also showing ‘great compassion and great sorrow’ intention.”

Cheng Guan put his palms together, “Shishu is amazingly intelligent, I am full of admiration.”

Wei Xiaobao said, “Yulin Dashi has once said, ‘Those who have left homes stand aloof from worldly affairs, resign themselves to adversity, if Qing Liang Temple is really facing a misfortune, we'll leave it to fate to escape from calamity’. We will pass away together under the wicked lamas’ blades, we will go together to the Western Pure Land of Ultimate Bliss. It will be a lively journey, it must be very interesting.”

The monks looked at each other in dismay. They all thought that although Wei Xiaobao’s words sound reasonable, all in all he adhered to old ideas too much. Perhaps it was due to misinterpretation of the Buddhist doctrine. Cheng Xin and Cheng Tong felt that these words were completely incompatible with the way he usually talked. They suspected that he was simply making ironic remark; most probably he wanted to incite Yulin and Xing Chi to speak up, asking for help on their own accord. Cheng Guan was the only one who believed without any doubt; he sighed in admiration delightedly.

The monks were silent for half a day. Suddenly Xing Dian loudly said, “Shifu once said that the Tibetan Lamas want to capture Shixiong because they want to oppress and harm common people, to take possession of our beautiful world. Our own life or death is not important, but millions of common people will be bullied and oppressed by them, won’t it be an enormous guilt for us? Shifu once said that we must never let them commit outrages like that.”

Wei Xiaobao nodded and said, “Shixiong’s words are very rational; compared to what Xiao Na has just said, you are one level higher. It’s just that the lamas’ power right now is too great, I am afraid we are heavily outnumbered.”

Xing Dian said, “Protecting Shifu, Shixiong, we break through their lines. I believe those lamas won’t be able to stop us.”

Wei Xiaobao said, “I am afraid in the battle we will inevitably kill and injure those lamas. Amitabha, our Buddha is virtuous, saving one person’s life is better than building a seven-floor pagoda; killing one life is like demolishing an eight-floor pagoda. Among various Buddhist monastic disciplines, the first one is abstaining from taking life. What should we do?”

Xing Dian said, “It is they who want to take life, we are compelled by circumstances and have to strive to defend ourselves. Naturally it would be best if we can avoid killing people, but we can’t simply helplessly let our hands tied and waiting for death.”

Suddenly there were footsteps outside the door, Shaolin monk Cheng Jue quickly walked in and said, “Reporting to Fangzhang Shishu: the crowd of lamas down the mountain has just gone uphill, they advanced for about a hundred zhang [approx. 1000ft/300m] and then stopped.”

“Why did they advance halfway and then stopped?” Wei Xiaobao wondered, “Perhaps they suddenly received our Buddha’s guidance that they repent and understood the truth about turning around and reach the shore.”

“No, no,” Xing Dian loudly said, “They are simply waiting for darkness; and then in a spurt of energy they will break in.” In the years past, he was a general of the Plain Yellow Banner, who had fought many battles when they were entering the Pass. He understood military strategy very well. Later on he became the commander [orig. zong guan – chief manager] of Shunzhi’s Imperial Bodyguards.

Wei Xiaobao said, “When they enter our Temple’s Hall of Great Strength and see our Buddha Tathagata’s stately treasured image, they will suddenly hang … hang something and reining their horses, or something like that.”

Xing Dian angrily said, “You, Xiao Fangzhang, you are really si … si …, ay, that’s impossible.” He was going to say ‘really silly’, but in the end thought that he should not be rude to the Abbot; the word was already at the tip of his tongue, but he was able to ‘rein the horse at the edge of the precipice’.

All along Yulin had been silent, listening to the debate; seeing the bulging blue veins on Xing Dian’s forehead, while his voice was getting louder, he smiled and said, “Xing Dian, you are the silly one; Fangzhang Dashi has already held the pearl of wisdom, he has the ‘success bamboo’ in his heart. Why are you worried too much?”

Xing Dian was startled. “Ah,” he said, “Turns out Fangzhang Dashi already has brilliant scheme.”

Showing a worried expression Wei Xiaobao said, “Brilliant scheme, that I do not have. The thirty-sixth stratagem: escape; since everybody agrees that we should break through, then let us break through! It’s just that unless we do not have any choice, we must not harm people’s lives too much.” Xing Dian, Cheng Xin and the others voiced their agreement.

Wei Xiaobao said, “In that case, let us get ready; we’ll wait for the dark, before they make their move, we’ll dash down the mountain, toward the east to Fuping county seat. Even if these lamas were more vicious than this, they won’t dare to attack the county seat openly.” Again Xing Dian and the others voiced their approval.

Suddenly Xing Chi said, “I am the unlucky one. Last time several lives were lost for my sake. Even if this time we can escape disaster, they will never give up and put this matter down. There will be many more lives lost, there will be no end to this.”

“Shixiong,” Xing Dian said, “These evil lamas want to abduct you to cruelly devastate common people under the heavens.”

Xing Chi sighed and said, “I am the embryo of misfortune of the world; when they arrive here, I will set myself on fire, let them henceforth lose heart, and that’s the end.”

Xing Dian anxiously said, “Your … your … no, Shixiong, you must never do that. Let me burn myself on your behalf.” [He was going to say ‘your majesty’ – huang shang.]

Xing Chi smiled and said, “You want to burn yourself on my behalf? What’s the use? They only want me, to force me into submission. That’s all.”

The monks were silent for half a day. Yulin finally said, “Shanzai, shanzai[3]! Xing Chi has become aware of the Great Way. This is indeed the real meaning of what Buddha has said, ‘If I don’t enter the hell, who would enter the hell?’”

Wei Xiaobao cursed in his heart, “Stinky monk, so what he said is the real meaning, and what I said was the fake meaing?”

Yulin continued, “When those lamas arrive, Lao Na and Xing Chi will set ourselves on fire together. Fangzhang Dashi and numerous Shixiong must not stop us.”

Wei Xiaobao and the other monks looked at each other in dismay; they were all dumbstruck.

Xing Chi slowly said, “When we besieged towns and took over lands in the past, all living creatures were turned to coal; Xiao Seng should have been dead a hundred times to redeem the atrocity. Today I can give my life for the common people, it is merely to compensate the past sin. If for Xiao Seng’s sake the battle continues, many more lives are harmed, it will only add to my guilt. I have made up my mind, I am asking gentlemen to protect and support me to fulfill this destiny. If by doing this I can reform the lamas, transforming the wicked to virtue, this indeed is a good deed.” While saying that, he stood up, and bowed and put his palms together toward Wei Xiaobao and the other five Shaolin monks.

---

[1] Buddhist knife and Buddhist staff, respectively, neither are supposed to be used to kill.

[2] Buddhist round meditation mat, usually made of woven cattail.

[3] Lit. ‘good, peace’. Just like ‘amituofo’, I feel like this phrase should not be translated.

[foxs]

Looking at his expression, Cheng Xin and the others knew that his mind was firmly set, it would be difficult to persuade him; therefore, they had no choice but to take their leave and return to Wenshu[1] Hall. Wei Xiaobao summoned all thirty-six Shaolin monks to discuss this matter. All the monks agreed that they must not allow the two masters to set themselves on fire; if things had come to a head, they would have to use force to stop them.

“We are all in agreement that we must protect the three masters completely, are we not?” Wei Xiaobao asked.

“Yes!” all the monks replied.

Wei Xiaobao said, “That’s not difficult. Listen to me: all thirty-six of you rush out the Temple, attack the east side together, pretend that you want to break the siege and escape down the mountain, but since it is difficult, you have to retreat back to the Temple. However, while doing that, capture forty or fifty lamas and bring them up here.”

“I wonder if Fangzhang wants to use these lamas as hostage, so that they will not dare to act rashly,” Cheng Xin said, “If that’s the case, we might as well capture the lamas with high position; the higher the better.”

“I am afraid it won’t be easy to capture big lamas,” Wei Xiaobao said, “Inevitably we will kill and injure too many people. Capturing several dozen lamas is enough.” The monks were unclear of his intention, but since the Abbot had issued an order, they had to follow it and went out of the Temple.

Not too long afterwards, Wei Xiaobao heard loud commotion coming from the waist of the mountain. He stood on the drum tower to watch, and saw the thirty-six Shaolin monks were charging into the crowd of lamas. The blades flickered, the battle had begun.

These thirty-six monks were Shaolin Temple’s martial art masters, naturally any regular lama was not their match. After rushing out for several dozen zhang, the number of lamas blocking their way was growing exponentially. Cheng Xin and the others moved their fists to punch, their feet to kick, their palms to slap, and their fingers to jab; in an instant they had overthrown several dozen men. In a loud voice Cheng Xin shouted, “The enemy is too powerful, we can’t go through them, let’s go back to the Temple for the time being and talk it over.” His internal energy was deep, his voice travelled far and echoed on the valley.

Cheng Tong also called out, “We can’t go through, what should we do?”

Cheng Xin shouted, “Everybody grab a lama and go back, we must teach them not to act rashly and randomly harm other people.” The monks grabbed the lamas, some caught two by carrying them in their arms, some caught one by carrying them over their shoulders; together they retreated to the Temple. Cheng Xin and Cheng Guang brought up the rear, they sealed several more people’s acupoints. They heard from the back of the lamas someone shouted an order in Tibetan. The crowd of lamas was shouting, yelling, cursing, but nobody ran after them.

Grinning from ear to ear, Wei Xiaobao ran to the gate to meet them. Upon counting the prisoners, he found that they had captured forty-seven lamas. Returning to Wenshu Hall, Wei Xiaobao said, “Strip these fellows naked, each one to have his eighteen acupoints sealed, and lock them up in the firewood shed at the backyard.”

The monks all felt that their Abbot’s order was a profound mystery. They stripped the forty-seven lamas naked, and sealed their acupoints, and locked them up inside the firewood room.

Wei Xiaobao put his palms together and said, “Everything in the world is empty, everything is nothingness, no self, no people, no monk, no lama. Emptiness is real, realism is empty. Monk is lama, lama is monk. All Shizhi, I want you to take off your cassock, and put on these lama robes!”

All the monks were stunned; they looked at each other in dismay. Wei Xiaobao called out loudly, “Shuang’er, come here. Help me dress as a young lama.” Shuang’er had been waiting outside the hall, she immediately came in. Rummaging through the stack, she found the smallest lama’s robe, and helped him to change. Wei Xiaobao was short; the robe he wore was still too big, so he pulled his dagger and cut a section each off the lower part of the robe and the sleeves. He tied his robe on the waist and forced a lama hat onto his head, and thus turned into a young lama. He said to Shuang’er, “You also have to dress as a young lama.”

Cheng Guang asked, “Shishu wants us to dress as lamas, I wonder what your intention is.”

Cheng Guan said, “Could it be that we are going to surrender to the lamas and join their yellow monasteries?”

“Absolutely not!” Wei Xiaobao said, “Everybody dresses as a lama, we go to the little vihara at the back of the mountain, and seize Yulin, Xing Chi and Xing Dian, three monks, and seal their acupoints. And then we force them to change into lama attire …”

Listening to here, Cheng Tong clapped his hands and laughed. He said, “Ingenious plan, ingenious plan! Several dozens of us, fake lamas, rushing down the mountain in the middle of the night, those lamas will have difficult time in distinguishing the real from the fake, hence it will be difficult for them to stop us.”

The rest of the monks also exclaimed in praise, immediately smile spread across their faces. Naturally nobody guessed that Wei Xiaobao’s ingenious plan was merely a repeat of the trick he played the other day by disguising himself as a prostitute to escape the great disaster.

Cheng Xin said, “This way we can rush out without too much killing and injuring; this is the best plan.”

Cheng Guang hesitantly said, “It’s just that we are going to offend Xing Chi Dashi and the others, three masters; it is rather disrespectful.”

Wei Xiaobao said, “Amitabha, saving three lives surpasses building a three by seven, twenty-one level Buddhist stupa. Tiny offense is better than burning themselves in a raging inferno.”

“Shishu is right,” Cheng Guang said.

Immediately the monks took off their monk robes and changed into lama attire. In all their lives, these monks had always adhered strictly to Buddhist monastic discipline, they always acted stern and dignified, yet this time they had to follow Wei Xiaobao fooling around. Seeing that after putting on lama clothing their appearances looked weird, they all could not bear feeling amused.

Wei Xiaobao said, “You all must wrap your monk robe into a bundle and carry it with you. We’ll change back after we escape. After we dash out down the mountain, if we are separated, well meet again at the Jixiang Temple in Fuping County.” He told Shuang’er to pack their money and other belongings, made it into a bundle and carried it on her back.

When the sky turned black, Wei Xiaobao said, “Let us smear some dust on our faces, and each one has to carry a bucket of water. Let’s move!”

Hearing the religious edict, the monks received it happily, and execute the order to the letter: immediately they smeared dust onto their faces, took a bucket of water and his weapon, and rushed toward the back of the mountain.

Arriving outside the small vihara, the monks babbled loudly and charged into the vihara. Yulin, Xing Chi and Xing Dian, three men, had determined to burn themselves. They piled up firewood in the middle of the courtyard, and drenched themselves with sesame oil. They only waited for the lamas’ arrival, to explain the purpose of their self-burning, and then they would ignite the fire. Who would have thought that the ‘lamas’ arrived so suddenly, without the least bit of forewarning? As soon as they heard the strange ‘wulu wulu huacha huacha’ shouts, which sounded like Tibetan, but not quite like Tibetan, dozens of lamas had already crashed into the vihara.

In a loud and clear voice Yulin said, “Gentlemen, please wait a bit, Lao Na has something to say …” Suddenly his head was drenched by a bucket of cold water, followed by several dozen buckets of cold water, one after another, were splashed onto the three of them.

It happened so quickly that not only the three of them did not have time to light the fire to burn themselves, even if they did, the fire would be quickly extinguished by the pouring of the water.

Shuang’er leaped to seal Xing Dian’s acupoint first. Xing Chi did not know martial art; Yulin’s martial art skill was not weak, but he was unwilling to fight back. In that confusion, their acupoints were quickly sealed. The monks quickly moved their hands and feet, they stripped the three monks, and put the lamas’ robe on. Wei Xiaobao was thinking of pretending to speak Tibetan by uttering some gibberish words, but he was afraid Yulin might recognize his voice; thereupon he restrained himself. He pursed his lips toward Shuang’er to signal her, she fetched a candlestick and lighted the firewood piled in the middle of the courtyard. Wei Xiaobao saw Xing Dian’s golden pestle lying on the floor at the corner of the room, he thought he would take it away, but to his surprise the golden pestle was very heavy, unexpectedly he could not even lift it up. Cheng Tong reached down and picked it up. Wei Xiaobao waved his hand, the monks rushed down the mountain eastwards, with Xing Chi, three monks, protected in the middle.

They were rushing only for several dozen zhang when the black smoke and the blaze from the small vihara shot up to the sky. The big pile of firewood had also been drenched with sesame oil that it was so easy to catch fire.

Halfway up the mountain, the lamas had also seen the fire, they shouted and yelling in alarm, immediately there was confusion everywhere. The leader of the lamas sent his men to fight the fire. Under the flame light they saw Wei Xiaobao and the monks, but they thought they were their own people. In the confusion, who had the thought of stopping and interrogating these people?

The monks reached the bottom of the mountain. After leaving the lamas a great distance behind them, they turned their head around and looked up toward the mountain. They saw the blaze illuminated the sky, the small vihara had been burned to the top of its roof. Cheng Tong said, “Once the small vihara is burned down, they will never find Xing Chi Dashi. They must have thought that he was burned to death inside the vihara, and thus they will lose heart and will not come to create trouble anymore. This is a very good deed indeed.”

Cheng Guang nodded and said, “What Shidi has said is very true.”

Wei Xiaobao asked Cheng Guan to unseal Xing Chi and the other two monks’ acupoints. He said, “We have offended you too much, please do not blame us.”

Xing Chi and the others had their acupoints sealed, they were unable to move a single step, yet their eyes and ears were open. Seeing what was going on around them, they had already understood it was the Shaolin monks who came to their rescue. Xing Dian cheered loudly, saying, “Brilliant scheme, brilliant scheme! All of us escaped easily. Fangzhang Dashi, you have just saved our lives, we are grateful you did not come too late, who would want to blame you?”

Xing Chi was determined to disappear by committing suicide by fire. Xing Dian was loyal and devoted, he had to accompany his master in death, but in his heart he was not really willing to die like this. Now that they escaped the great catastrophe, he was extremely delighted.

Xing Chi smiled and said, “We did not harm a single person in this matter, that is indeed remarkable.”

Suddenly they heard footsteps on the mountain road right in front of them, a large crowd of people were hurrying up the mountain. Cheng Tong said, “Shishu, a large group of lamas is coming to attack.”

Wei Xiaobao said, “We’ll continue walking forward, we’ll mumble some gibberish, and when we see them, show some smiling expression and point up the mountain. In short, do not fight with them.” The monks voiced their compliance, even Xing Chi and Yulin also nodded in agreement. In his heart Wei Xiaobao was very happy, “The Old Emperor is following my order, even the Old Emperor’s Shifu is also following my order.”

With Xing Chi in the middle, the crowd of monks rushed along the main road. They saw from the other side of a dip on the road a group of people was rushing their way. There were lanterns and torches in their hands; they were not lamas, but Buddhist pilgrims on their way to offer incense. There were yellow pouches hanging from their necks, on the pouches were written these characters: ‘devoutly submitting incense’ [or ‘going on pilgrimage devotionally’] and so on.

When the group of Shaolin monks came near, both sides were equally surprised. Cheng Tong and the others had already stopped talking, but Cheng Guan and some others whose brains were quick started mumbling some gibberish in ‘fake Tibetan’.

From among the pilgrims a man stepped out and shouted, “What are you doing here?”

This man was tall and powerfully built, his voice was loud and clear. As soon as Wei Xiaobao saw him, he was greatly delighted, for he recognized the man as the Chief of the Imperial Bodyguards, Dolong. He rushed forward immediately and called out, “Duo Dage [in Chinese, Dolong is spelled 'Duo Long'], look here, do you know who Xiao Di [little brother] is?”

Dolong was startled; he took a lantern from someone by his side and lifted it up to illuminate Wei Xiaobao’s face.

Wei Xiaobao winked and him and burst into laughter. Dolong was surprised and delighted at the same time. “It’s … It’s Wei Xiongdi,” he said, “You … how come you are here? And dress as a young lama too?”

Wei Xiaobao laughed and said, “And how come you are here?”

While they were talking, from behind Dolong a group of pilgrims rushed over, the leader of these pilgrims was actually Zhao Qixian. As soon as Wei Xiaobao saw them, he recognized the pilgrims to be imperial bodyguards in disguise; in fact, he knew most of these people. The bodyguards surrounded Wei Xiaobao, they talked and laughed in an intimate way.

In a low voice Wei Xiaobao asked Dolong, “Did His Majesty send you here?”

Dolong also replied in low voice, “His Majesty and Empress Dowager are going to Mount Wutai to burn incense; right now they are at the Lingjing Temple.”

Wei Xiaobao was pleasantly surprised. “His Majesty is coming to Mount Wutai?” he asked, “That’s wonderful! That’s wonderful!” While musing in his heart, “And what does that Old wh0re come here for? The Old Emperor can’t wait to kill her.”

Not long afterwards, a group of valiant cavalry troops arrived; all of them also dressed as pilgrims. Wei Xiaobao asked, “In total, how many pilgrims are coming from Beijing to Mount Wutai this time?”

In a low voice Dolong replied, “Apart from us, the Imperial Bodyguards, the Valiant Cavalry, the Vanguards, and the Personal Guards are accompanying the Emperor.”

“So there are about thirty, forty thousand troops?” Wei Xiaobao asked.

“More than thirty-four thousand troops,” Dolong replied.

“And who is in command of this Emperor-protector force?” Wei Xiaobao asked.

“It’s Prince Kang,” Dolong replied.

Wei Xiaobao laughed and said, “Another old friend.”

He beckoned Zhao Qixian. When he came near, Wei Xiaobao said, “Zhao Dage, please report to Prince Kang, I need to mobilize the troops for an important mission. This is urgent, there is not enough time to ask for instructions from him first.” Zhao Qixian obeyed the order and left.

Finally the Commander [orig. ‘du tong’, see previous note on Qing military] of Valiant Cavalry of Plain Yellow Banner, Chalju, also arrived. Wei Xiaobao said, “Duo Laoge [old brother], Dutong Daren, there are several thousand Tibetan lamas who found out about His Majesty’s pilgrimage. Just now they are surrounding Qingliang Temple with the intention to start a rebellion. I ask you, two gentlemen, to arrest these rebellious thieves. You are going to render an enormous service.”

The two of them were delighted; they thanked Wei Xiaobao, saying, “Wei Daren is handing us a great merit, how can we deserve it?”

Wei Xiaobao said, “Everybody is devotedly working for His Majesty, why make any distinction between you and me? This is called ‘blessing we enjoy together, difficulty we bear together’.”

---

[1] Manjushri, the Boddhisattva of keen awareness.

[foxs]

They issued the order immediately to guard all roads around the mountain, and send a group of elite cavalry to charge up the mountain. Wei Xiaobao called loudly, “The Holy Sage is benevolent and wise, he is also virtuous; you are to arrest the rebellious thieves only, you must not harm too many lives. Our Emperor is ‘raw bird fish soup’ [niao sheng yu tang], and not a bad Emperor.” The Imperial Bodyguards and the Emperor’s personal bodyguards acknowledged the order together.

Although Kangxi had explained briefly the four-word phrase ‘yao shun yu tang’ [see note 9 of Chapter 14], it was still very hard for Wei Xiaobao to understand; he always remembered the phrase as ‘niao sheng yu tang’. This bowl of soup is a very good soup, not a bad soup; every emperor who heard it would be extremely delighted.

Actually, he said those words for the benefit of the Old Emperor; he thought that today the old and the young Emperors, father and son, would meet, he needed to lick the Old Emperor’s behind, which he thought would be more effective that licking the young Emperor’s behind. He turned around and walked toward Xing Chi. “Three masters,” he said, “Our clothes are nondescript [orig. ‘neither fish nor fowl’], we need to go to Jing’e Temple ahead to change. We must find a peaceful and quiet place to rest, so that idle people will not disturb the three masters’ quiet meditation.” Xing Chi and the others nodded their approval.

They walked several more li and arrived at Jing’e Temple. As soon as he entered the gate of the monastery, Wei Xiaobao took out a thousand-tael banknote, which he handed it over to the head monk, saying, “We need to temporarily borrow your precious monastery to rest, you must not ask too much. If you ask one question, I will deduct ten taels; you do not ask any question, all these thousand taels are our offering. If you ask a hundred and one questions, you owe me ten taels. Fair and square, cheating neither young nor old.”

Seeing the huge sum of money, the head monk was surprised and happy at the same time; instantly he said ‘yes, yes’ repeatedly. “Shixiong,” he said, “You …” The words were at the tip of his tongue, suddenly he was startled and busily changed his statement, “You must drink a cup of tea.” And he hurriedly went in to serve the tea.

Originally, he was going to ask, ‘Shixiong, you want to drink a cup of tea or not?’ but his mind was quick and he changed his statement, and thus saved himself ten taels.

Wei Xiaobao went out the monastery and secretly passed an order to have more than a hundred Imperial Bodyguards to guard Jing’e Temple all the way around, he also dispatched two Imperial Bodyguards to report to the Emperor: “Your servant Wei Xiaobao is under great responsibility, does not dare to leave without permission, waiting your gracious presence at Jing’e Temple.”

One of the Imperial Bodyguards said, “Reporting to Wei Fu Zongguan [deputy chief]: as subjects, we should go and kowtow in front of His Majesty, we cannot wait for the Emperor to see us.”

Wei Xiaobao spread out his hands, and said with a laugh, “Can’t be help. This time good or bad I have to break the rules and have a bad manner.”

The two Imperial Bodyguards complied. They turned around and left, while sticking out their tongues and thought, “What a nerve, he does not even want his life anymore.” Right away they rushed to report to the Emperor.

After changing their clothes, the monks sat down to rest. They heard the battle cry on the mountain shaking the earth, the Imperial Bodyguards and the Emperor’s personal guards were rounding up the lamas. The commotion continued for quite a while. Finally the noise gradually died down, until more than an hour later suddenly not a sound was to be heard [orig. ‘ten thousand pipes are still’], but they heard a few dozen men’s footsteps from the distance approaching, and stopped in front of the monastery. And then there were the heavy thumping sound of boots as a group of men entered the monastery.

Wei Xiaobao thought, “The young Emperor is here.” Pulling out his dagger, he held it tight as he stood in front of Xing Chi’s meditation room, while his face showed a determined expression to protect his master, the ‘ten thousand deaths will not prevent me’ look, one that would put Xing Dian’s loyalty and brave sacrifice, to shame.

The sound of footsteps continued from the outside to the inside, about a dozen Imperial Bodyguards in civilian clothes came over in quick steps, with lanterns in their hands. And then they stopped and stood on either side of the pathway. One Imperial Bodyguard hissed, “Quickly take your knife away.”

Wei Xiaobao retreated several steps, with his back against the door and the dagger in front of his chest, he struck a pose ‘one man guards the pass, ten thousand men cannot enter’, and shouted, “The masters are resting inside the meditation room, no one is allowed to come to create disturbance.”

A young man wearing blue garment stepped out, it was none other than Kangxi. It was only then did Wei Xiaobao put the dagger back to its sheath; he rushed forward to kowtow, and said in a low voice, “Your Majesty, rejoice. The old … old fashi[1] is inside.”

With a trembling voice Kangxi said, “You call … call [or 'announce'] for me.” Turning around, he said, “All of you, get out!”

After the Imperial Bodyguards had left, Wei Xiaobao knocked twice lightly on the meditation room’s door, he said, “Hui Ming desires to have an audience.”

After a long time, there was still no response from inside. Kangxi could not bear not to rush ahead one step and knocked twice on the door. Wei Xiaobao shook his hand to him, signaling him not to speak. The cry ‘Fu Huang’ [father emperor] was already at the tip of Kangxi’s tongue, but he fought hard to swallow it back.

After a long time, they heard Xing Dian’s voice from behind the door, “Fangzhang Dashi, my Shixiong’s spirit is exhausted, please forgive him not to grant audience. His body has entered the gate of emptiness, there is no more earthly destiny. Please tell the outsider not to harm his peaceful cultivation.”

“Yes, yes,” Wei Xiaobao said, “Please open the door, we just want to see him one time.”

Xing Dian said, “My Shixiong’s meaning is: this is Jing’e Temple, where we all are guests here, we are not required to accept Fangzhang’s religious edict, please don’t blame us.”

Wei Xiaobao turned his head to look at Kangxi, he saw his miserable expression and thought, “You said that I am not the Abbot here and thus cannot tell you to open the door. How about I call this temple’s abbot to knock on your door? That will be too easy.” He was about to turn around to call the Abbot, when Kangxi could not endure anymore and suddenly broke into a loud cry.

Wei Xiaobao thought, “If I have this temple’s abbot telling you to open the door, that means I am forcing the old emperor. Beseeching him gently is better.” Thereupon he beat his own chest several times and cried out loudly. He cried and wailed at the same time, “In this world, I am an orphan with no mother and no father, alone and forsaken, no one loves me. What joy is there to stay alive? It would be better for me to crash my head against the wall and be done with it.” Faking a cry was the skill he had perfected since he was little, just by bawling a few more times, tears started to pour down like rain; it was exceptionally sorrowful.

Hearing him crying, at first Kangxi was startled, but then he could not bear his grief and cried out even louder.

Suddenly they heard a creaking noise, the meditation room’s door opened. Xing Dian stood at the door and said, “Xiao Shizhu [young benefactor], please come in.”

Kangxi was overwhelmed with mixed feelings of grief and joy; he rushed into the room and embraced Xing Chi’s feet, while crying loudly.

Xing Chi gently stroked his head while saying, “Chi’er, Chi’er[2].” Tears also streamed down his face.

With bowed head Yulin and Xing Dian went out of the meditation room and closed the door behind them. Without even looking at Wei Xiaobao, who was standing outside the door, they walked straight outside. Xing Dian felt he was being rude, especially since he was grateful to Wei Xiaobao; so after walking about a dozen steps, he turned his head around and called, “Fangzhang.”

Wei Xiaobao was focusing his attention to listen to the conversation between Xing Chi and Kangxi, father and son, inside the room, he completely ignored Xing Dian. He heard Kangxi was crying, “Fu Huang, child misses you very much.”

Xing Chi said something, but from behind the door Wei Xiaobao was unable to hear clearly. Afterwards Kangxi stopped crying and started talking, but the two of them spoke in a very low voice that Wei Xiaobao could not hear anything. Although he was curious, he did not have the audacity to shove the door open even a crack; without any choice he had to wait outside with his ear against the door.

A moment later, he vaguely heard Kangxi mentioning ‘Empress Duan Jing’, four characters. Wei Xiaobao thought, “Last time when the Old Emperor told me to pass on his message to the young emperor, he did not want me to give the old wh0re any trouble; therefore, following his order, I did not mention these words at all. Perhaps now the Old Emperor changed his mind?”

Another moment, he heard Xing Chi said, “Today you and I met, it was a mistake; it harms my cultivation considerably. Later, you must not come again.” Kangxi did not make any noise. Xing Chi continued, “You sent someone to wait upon me. Although it came from your filial piety, those who have left their homes experience strong opposition from the evil spirit. Although your intention was proper, having someone to serve me was very thoughtful, but it is inappropriate …”

The two of them talked some more. Finally Xing Chi said, “You may go now. Take a good care of yourself, by cherishing the common people, you are fulfilling your filial duty toward me.”

Kangxi apparently was reluctant to part, he did not want to leave yet. At last Wei Xiaobao heard footsteps toward the door. Wei Xiaobao hastily took several steps back, and turned his eyes away from the door, looking toward the front courtyard. ‘Creak’, the door opened. Xing Chi walked out, holding Kangxi’s hand. Father and son looked at each other for a moment. Kangxi was holding his father’s hand firmly. Xing Chi said, “You are very good, you are much better than I was. I feel very relieved, you must feel the same!” Gently he pulled his hand from Kangxi’s grip, and withdrew back to the room and closed the door. A moment later, ‘click’, he put the latch on.

Kangxi threw himself to the door, while sobbing uncontrollably. Wei Xiaobao stood by his side, accompanying him shedding some tears.

Kangxi cried for a while. He knew his father would not open the door again, but he was unwilling to leave just like that. Pulling Wei Xiaobao’s hand, they sat side by side on the stone steps in front of the main hall. Taking out a handkerchief, he wiped his tears, and looked up at the white cloud in the sky. When he had calmed down, he said, “Xiao Guizi, Fu Huang said that you are very good, but he does not want you to wait upon him anymore. Fu Huang said although having the subjects to guard was very thoughtful, but it will make him, Senior, not like those who have left home.” While saying the words ‘those who have left home’, he shed tears again.

Hearing the Old Emperor did not want him to serve anymore, Wei Xiaobao was extremely delighted, yet his face did not show the least bit of happiness, he also did not dare to appear extremely ‘loyal, dashing on bravely with no thought of personal safety’, for fear that it would give him future trouble. He said, “There are too many people who want to harm the Old Emperor, Your Majesty have to think of a way to protect him in secret.”

“Definitely,” Kangxi said, “Those evil lamas, humph, his granny, what scheme are they playing?” Originally he could only curse ‘damn it’ [ta ma de – lit. his mother]; several months they did not see each other, he had learned one more cussing word, ‘his granny’ [ta nainai de].

“Shifu,” Wei Xiaobao said, “You have one more cuss word.”

There appeared a slight smiling expression on Kangxi’s face; he said, “It’s my Meizi [younger sister], she learned it from the Imperial Bodyguards. She and Empress Dowager came with me to the mountain …” his countenance sank, “Fu Huang does not wish to see them.” Wei Xiaobao nodded.

Kangxi continued, “Those lamas must want to kidnap Fu Huang, in an attempt to force me into submission, to put me under their control. Humph, they think it’s that easy? Xiao Guizi, you are very good, this time you saved Fu Huang, your merit is not small.”

“Your Majesty’s strategy is divine,” Wei Xiaobao said, “You have thought about everything early on, you sent your servant here to be a monk, it was exactly for this reason. Your servant does not have any merit, it does not matter who Your Majesty sent here, anybody can do it.”

“That is not necessarily so,” Kangxi said, “Fu Huang said you understood his wish not to harm anybody in your escape.”

Wei Xiaobao said, “Your servant saw the Old Emperor was about to light the fire to burn himself, saying that no matter what he wanted to give up his life and vanish; it scared me that my soul was about to leave me, I nearly pissed in my pants.”

Kangxi was startled, “What do you mean lighting the fire to burn himself? To give up his life and vanish?”

With a lot more spice Wei Xiaobao told him everything so that Kangxi broke into cold sweat. Wei Xiaobao said, “In a moment of desperation, your servant drenched the Old Emperor with a bucket of cold water; it was greatly disrespectful.”

Kangxi said, “Your intention was to protect your master. Very good, very good.”

He was silent for half a day. Turning his head to take a glance at the meditation room’s door he said, “The Old Emperor told me to cherish common people, never to raise tax. You have already passed on this message to me, this time the Old Emperor personally exhorted me. Naturally I will never dare to forget.”

“What is ‘never raise endowment’ [yong bu jia fu]?” Wei Xiaobao asked[3].

Kangxi smiled and replied, “It’s ‘fu’ from ‘fu shui’ – taxation. Those emperors from the Ming Dynasty indulged in lives of luxury, deployed troops to go to war, never had enough money; therefore, they issued imperial decree for the common people to pay more taxes. Ming Dynasty’s government officials were extremely corrupt, the Emperor wanted to raise one million taels in tax, the government officials, big and small, extorted at least two million taels. The common people were already poor, the imperial court raised taxes this year, and raised duties the next, how could the common people still have enough rice to eat? The millet and wheat crops harvested from the fields were all taken by the government officials, very soon the common people’s entire family would die of starvation; they had no choice but to revolt. This is called ‘the government official drive the people to revolt’.”

Wei Xiaobao nodded. “I understand,” he said, “So the common people of the Ming Dynasty revolted because the Emperor and the government officials were bad.”

“Isn’t that so?” Kangxi said, “During the last years of Ming Dynasty’s Chongzhen, everywhere in the world the common people did not have rice to eat; therefore, rebellion arose in the east and in the west. The Henan rebellion was crushed, Shanxi arose; Shanxi was suppressed, Sichuan arose. Those poor people migrated to the east and fled to the west just to scrape a living. The Ming Dynasty perished in these poor people’s hands, the Han people say it was roving bandits’ rebellion. Actually, those rebels and roving bandits were forced to existence by the imperial court.”

“So that’s what happened,” Wei Xiaobao said, “The Old Emperor wants Your Majesty never to raise tax, then there won’t be any roving bandits in the world. Your Majesty is ‘raw bird fish soup’, iron and barrels are like rivers and mountains, long live the Emperor!”

“Yao shun yu tang; isn’t it easier said than done?” Kangxi said, “But we, Manchu people, came to be China’s Emperor, we must strive to be better than those tyrannical and muddle-headed rulers of the Ming Dynasty; only then will we not let down the common people of the world.”

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[1] Reminder: fashi – one who has mastered the Buddhist sutras.

[2] The ‘chi’ character is the same as his name ‘Xing Chi’, meaning ‘imbecile / sentimental / stupid / foolish / silly’. ‘Er’ is a term of endearment. I don’t know why he called his own son ‘the silly one’.

[3] ‘Fu’ can mean ‘poetic essay / taxation / to bestow on / to endow with’.

[foxs]

Wei Xiaobao thought, “The people of Tian Di Hui and Mu Palace say that Manchurian Qing’s Tatars occupy our Han people’s rivers and mountains, there is no single person who does not hate them with clenched teeth. Yet the young emperor says that Ming Dynasty’s emperors were no good, and that he, a Tatar emperor, is better. That’s not strange, there are always people who like to praise themselves.”

Kangxi added, “Fu Huang also told me that over the years he quietly cultivate Zen meditation, whenever he recalled our Manchu people’s conduct and deeds in the years past, oftentimes he would feel so ashamed that cold sweats drenched his back. Chongzhen of Ming Dynasty was persecuted to death by Li Zicheng’s roving bandits. Wu Sangui came to lend his troops to us, the Great Qing, and defeated Li Zicheng, and thus he avenged the Ming Dynasty emperor’s great enmity. Yet not only the common Han people are not grateful to the Great Qing, they consider us as their enemy. Tell me, what kind of logic is that?”

Wei Xiaobao said, “I suppose they are muddle-headed. In fact, in this world, muddle-headed people are many, smart people are a few. Or perhaps they simply forget favors and violate justice.”

“That’s not necessarily so,” Kangxi said, “Han people say we are barbarians, ethnic minority from outside, who are taking possession of their beautiful rivers and mountains. When the Qing troops entered the pass, they killed and burned everywhere, they murdered countless common people; it was the reason they hate us, Manchus, to the bones.”

Wei Xiaobao was actually a Han, but Kangxi bestowed him to be a Manchu person of the Plain Yellow Banner, when he talked to him, he always said ‘we or us’, treating him as a Manchu. Actually, speaking about national affairs, Wei Xiaobao did not understand anything. It’s just that Kangxi was excited since he had just met his father. Thinking about his Father Emperor’s earnest admonition, he discussed it with this little trusted aide.

Wei Xiaobao said, “When your servant was still in Yangzhou, I have heard people mentioning the tragedy of Qing troops massacring people.”

Kangxi sighed. “Yangzhou’s Ten Days, Jiading’s Three Slaughters, people were killed that their number cannot be counted; those are enormously evil deeds that we, the Great Qing, committed. I am going to issue an imperial edict to exempt Yangzhou and Jiading of land tax for three years.”

Wei Xiaobao thought, “Yangzhou people do not have to pay taxes for three years, everybody will be rich, Lovely Spring Courtyard’s business will greatly flourish. How can I get the young emperor to send me to handle this matter for him in Yangzhou? I will tell Mama not to be a prostitute anymore, I will open three brothels for her, laozi will be the boss, and then I will be a banker, I will open a big gambling event for ten days, it will be another ‘Yangzhou’s Ten Days’. Afterwards, I will bring a lot of money to Jiading and damn it, I will gamble three days. It will be ‘Jiading’s Three Gambles’[1].”

He also thought, “Both the Old Emperor and His Majesty said that during Jiading’s Three ‘du’ [see note 10 referred above] the number of people being killed is too many, this is an enormous disaster. How could they kill a lot of people by gambling three times? I wonder what kind of place Jiading is. In that place, the people’s gambling skill is very formidable, I must be very careful.”

“Xiao Guizi, what do you think?” Kangxi asked.

“Good, very good,” Wei Xiaobao busily replied, “That way, everybody will have rice to eat, have money … nobody will revolt.” He was about to say ‘have money to gamble’, but as the word was about to come out, he withdrew it.

Kangxi said, “Although everybody has rice to eat and has money to be used, not necessarily nobody will revolt. When you left Beijing, you sent the Imperial Bodyguards to escort a man, whom you said was a rebel from Mount Wangwu. I personally interrogated him several times.”

Wei Xiaobao was shocked in his heart; he stood up hastily and said, “Your Majesty ordered your servant not to meddle in other people’s business; henceforth I did not dare to do that.”

“Sit down,” Kangxi said, “You managed this matter very well. It was not other people’s business at all, in fact, from now on we must pay close attention to this matter.”

“Yes, yes,” Wei Xiaobao said, but in his heart he was unable to make head or tail of it.

Kangxi said in a low voice, “I sent those Imperial Bodyguards to rebuke you, it was to block the ears and eyes of the enemy, so that the rebellious thieves won’t guard against me.”

Wei Xiaobao was delighted. He sprang up, and then sat back down again and said in a low voice, “Your servant understands. Turns out Your Majesty are afraid this rebellious thief Wu Sangui would be alarmed.”

“Whether Wu Sangui wants to rebel, it is still hard to say,” Kangxi said, “But since the beginning he did not have a loyal heart; he took advantage of my young age and did not have me in his eyes at all.”

Wei Xiaobao said, “Your Majesty can always use little tricks here and there to let him know how formidable you are. Wu Sangui, his granny, what’s so great about him? Your Majesty only need to stretch out your little finger, you will sweep away a thousand army, high mountain flowing water.”

Kangxi smiled, “You did not use those two idioms correctly. You should say ‘stretch out your little finger, you will sweep away a thousand army, kill him to be utterly defeated[2]’.”

“Yes, yes, yes,” Wei Xiaobao said, “Your servant has become a monk for several months, my literary knowledge did not make any progress; from now on I must serve Your Majesty more often, so that my usage of idiom will be like ‘sweeping away a thousand army’, so that people who hear it will be ‘utterly defeated’.”

Kangxi could not help but bursting in laughter, his melancholy was somewhat reduced. In a low voice he said, “That servant Wu Sangui is very good at military strategy, the number of fierce generals and elite troops under his command is indeed not a few. If he really wanted to rebel and allied himself with Geng Jingzhong of Fujian and Shang Kexi of Guangdong, the three forces would make a thorny problem indeed. We can only take our time, must make our move only after fixing our plan, so that once we move, we will make his granny Wu Sangui utterly defeated and piss in his pants in terror.”

Kangxi was diligent and studious, every day after he personally attended the government affairs, he would have members of Hanlin Imperial Academy to attend upon him, to explore classic books in Confucianism, poetry and literature. He learned a lot about the writings and poems of Confucius; therefore, to suddenly hear him saying phrases like ‘his granny’ or ‘piss in his pants in terror’, it was clear that he was really not happy.

Meeting with his father today, he was both delighted and grieved; but after only less than an hour of intimacy, he was already thrown out of the door without knowing if he would ever see him again in the future, he was deeply wounded emotionally. Luckily there was this Wei Xiaobao whose words were amusing, so that the melancholy in his heart was somewhat relieved. Moreover, speaking about major political affair like crushing rebellion and restoring order had aroused the lofty aspiration in his heart.

He stood up, took four piece of stones from the courtyard, arranged them on the ground, and said, “Of the four kings of Han army, the east side, the south side and the west side must be separated from each other, they cannot be allowed to ally with each other. Luckily that fellow Ding Nan Wang[3] Kong Yude has died, leaving behind a daughter, hence it will be easy to deal with her.” While saying that, he lightly kicked a piece of stone.

He said, “Geng Jingzhong is bold but not very astute, nothing to worry about. Only he must be prevented from making an alliance with the Zheng clan of Taiwan.” And he kicked another stone.

He said, “Shang Kexi, father and sons, do not get along well with each other. His two sons are like fire and water, they are always in conflict with each other, rendering him powerless.” And he also kicked the third stone away, leaving one stone left, the biggest one, to which he stared while seeming lost in thought.

“Your Majesty,” Wei Xiaobao asked, “Is that Wu Sangui?” Kangxi nodded. Wei Xiaobao cursed, “That treacherous bandit, he is old but refuses to die, yet he gives my lord of ten thousand years a big headache. Your Majesty, soak him with your pee.”

Kangxi burst out laughing; his childish heart was aroused, he really untied his pants and peed on that piece of stone. He said with a laugh, “Come, your turn.”

Wei Xiaobao laughed aloud and peed on the stone. He said with a laugh, “This chapter is called, ‘Lord of Ten Thousand Years High Mountain Flowing Water, Xiao Guizi … Xiao Guizi …’” He was going to say ‘sweeping a thousand army’, but thought that in this case this phrase was not appropriate. Suddenly he remembered the storyteller telling about the tale of Three Kingdoms, there was a chapter about ‘Guan Yunchang flooded seven armies with water’, thereupon he said, “Xiao Guizi flooded seven armies with water.”

Kangxi was amused even more. He tied up his pants and said with a laugh, “There will come a day we catch that stinky thief, then we will really pee on his body.”

Kangxi sat down on the stone steps again. They heard sound of footsteps outside; although nobody said anything, it was obvious that there were quite a number of people gathering outside. Wei Xiaobao said, “It looks like they have caught all those evil lamas. Your Majesty really have flood of good fortune filling the heavens; it was so fortunate that you have arrived just in time to catch all those evil lamas in one net.”

“Actually, that was not luck,” Kangxi said, “As soon as I received your secret report, I sent people to investigate. After I found out, I rushed here, but actually I was one step too late, so that those evil lamas have alarmed the holy sage. If not for your quick-wit, I will regret it for the rest of my life, and won’t escape from guilt.”

Wei Xiaobao was puzzled, “But your servant has never sent you any secret report,” he said.

Kangxi said, “When I sent the Imperial Bodyguards to Shaolin Temple to deliver the imperial edict, they said that they saw a Mongolian prince, several lamas, and several military officers; is that right?”

“That’s right,” Wei Xiaobao said.

Kangxi said, “You instructed them to investigate in secret, what were they up to, and what was their power. Under investigation, they found out that the Mongolian prince was called Galdan. The military officer was Ma Bao, a commander under that servant Wu Sangui. They were conspiring with the lamas in rebellious scheme, something that would not be good to Fu Huang.”

Wei Xiaobao slapped his thigh, “So that’s what happened!” he exclaimed, “Your servant saw that they were sneaky, definitely not good people, I did not know they are Wu Sangui’s people.” Actually, he had known about those people’s name and background, the reason he wanted Zhao Qixian and the others to investigate was to track down the girl in green, while bringing false charge against Wu Sangui. He did not think that it would lead the young emperor to catch up to Mount Wutai.

Kangxi said, “Later on those three groups went their separate ways. Imperial Bodyguard Zhang Kangnian followed the lamas. He heard that they were assembling a large group of manpower; they were going to Mount Wutai to kidnap an important person. He did not realize the significance of this matter. After following them for several more days, he returned to the Capital and presented a memorial to me. As soon as I heard it, how could I not be anxious? I wanted to set off at once; but when the Emperor leaves the Capital, there are so many formalities and rites that have to be performed. Although I issued an imperial decree to have everything conforms to simplicity, I was still one day late.”

Wei Xiaobao said, “That rebellious thief Wu Sangui is so brazen, he dares to dispatch several thousand lamas to come and offend the Old Emperor. That … won’t that be blatant rebellion?”

Kangxi sucked his breath. “Not too loud!” he hissed, “I only know that his officer was travelling together with those lamas. Whether he is rebelling or not, we can’t say for sure for the time being.”

“I am sure he is, I am sure he is!” Wei Xiaobao said, “If he was a good person, how could he send a general under his command to conspire with those evil lamas to secretly bring harm to the Old Emperor?”

“He is definitely not a good person,” Kangxi said. After hesitating for a moment, he slowly said, “It’s just that I am still too young, in deploying troops and fighting a battle, I am not his match. It would be best for us to wait several more years, wait till I grow up some more, and he grows older some more. When we fight that time, I am sure that victory will be within our grasp. Xiao Guizi, you need not be impatient, waiting one day longer will give us one day more advantage, while at the same time will give him one day more harm.”

Wei Xiaobao anxiously said, “What if he grows old and die? Won’t that be too easy for him?”

Kangxi smiled. “Then that is his luck,” he said. After a short pause he continued, “Just now Fu Huang admonished me: it would be best if I can not resort to arms and go to war; once we go to battle, it does not matter the outcome, soldiers will be dead and injured, that need not be mentioned, but the common people in all the world will suffer countless suffering. For that reason, if Wu Sangui died early and did not wait for me to take action against him, although it won’t be fun …”

While he paused for a moment, Wei Xiaobao interjected, “It’s definitely not fun at all.”

Kangxi laughed and said, “As far as common people and soldiers are concerned, war is not a good thing. Xiao Guizi, if you want something fun, I can take you to Liaodong (Peninsula) to hunt black bears, hunt tigers.”

Wei Xiaobao was delighted. “Wonderful, wonderful!” he called out.

Kangxi turned his gaze to the meditation room’s door and quietly said, “When I was six, Fu Huang took me to go hunting at Liaodong. And now …” Slowly he walked toward the door. His hand gently stroked the wooden door, while his throat choked and his eyes moist. After a while, he kneeled down and did obeisance several times, while saying in a low voice, “Fu Huang, take a good care of yourself, Child’s leaving.” Wei Xiaobao also kneeled down and kowtowed.

Kangxi went to the Hall of Great Strength. Prince Kang, along with prominent military leaders such as Valiant Cavalry Commander Chalju, Imperial Bodyguards Chief Dolong, several top ranking officers who accompanied the Emperor such as Songgotu, the Vanguard Regiment Commander, the Personal Guard Commander, and the others, have been waiting in the hall. Seeing the Emperor’s arrival, they all kneeled down to pay their respect. When the officers stood up, they took a furtive glance and noticed that the young emperor’s eyes were red, obviously he had been crying; they were all surprised.

Although the Emperor was young, he had outstanding knowledge and experience, he had demonstrated wise judgment in handling matters; the court official’s reverence to him was growing day by day, nobody dared to belittle him due to his age. Unexpectedly the young Emperor could cry; it was indeed an unusual happening. They also noticed the tearstains on Wei Xiaobao’s face, and thought, “This kid Wei Xiaobao must have teased the Emperor to tears. Two youngsters, I don’t know what kind of games they are playing.”

Kangxi tightly concealed the fact that Shunzhi has left home on Mount Wutai, even the closest family member, his own little sister Princess Jianning was not aware, naturally the court officials were in the dark even more.

Prince Kang stepped forward to present a memorial, “Submitting a report to Your Majesty: We found several thousand lamas creating havoc and disturbing peace outside the Qingliang Temple with unknown reason. Right now all of them have been captured and been brought here, awaiting the imperial decree on how to deal with them.”

Kangxi nodded. “Get the leader and bring him here,” he said.

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[1] In original Chinese, the words slaughter ‘tu’ sounds like gamble ‘du’.

[2] Wei Xiaobao said ‘gao shan liu shui’ – high mountain flowing water [reminder: these two idioms were the name of Mu Palace’s stances], Kangxi corrected him ‘utterly defeated’ [‘luo hua liu shui’ – falling flower flowing water].

[3] Ding Nan Wang, the King who Stabilized the South. Kong Yu De (? - 1652) was given Guangxi Province for his services in conquering China. He was one of the three leaders of Chinese Bannermen who has went over the Manchus in early 1630's. (Courtesy of Ace High)