Originally Posted by
tape
Perhaps relating my life to yours would help, since people generally feel better when they see other people also get the big F YOU from life.
So about 3.5 years ago while I was in my last year of college my mom developed cerebellum shrinkage in her brain, which led to a Stephen Hawking-esque disease that slowly robs her of all her motor facilities, with the kicker being that this type also robs her of much of her cognitive abilities.
So she was slowly becoming paralyzed and can no longer think rationally or clearly, but can still feel grief and happiness and communicate on a child/pre-teen level.
I had plans to travel and work abroad for a few years, and had several things set up from previous internships and schools. Of course I couldn't in good conscience go, so more or less the work I did in the past two years along with the plans and the life I set myself up for for the next few years was washed down the drain solely due to some random genetic defect that affects one in a million people.
Her medical bills are enormous and I more or less spend all my available money helping out in whatever way I can. So due to some random life event, my hopes and dreams could easily be shattered, and I could easily never achieve what I want to achieve without just saying eff everything and only think about myself and take the path I wanted to take.
In 5 years, I can still be stuck with no financial security and just paying bill after bill, and having nothing to show for my life. People will understand when I tell them this sob story, but they'll move on in a minute and classify me as that guy who's never done anything interesting or amount to much in his life. I've been robbed of some things, but I'm trying my best to look at things positively. I can reshape my ambitions and figure out something I can do that'll satisfy myself without shirking my responsibilities. It really, really, really (times infinity) sucks to be in this situation, but I think if I'm trying to make the most out of it in mine, it would be nice to see you try also.