Originally Posted by
grace
I have a very different tack on this scene for I thought Erkang comes across as a clever mediator . Craftily, he presses the right buttons on Xiao Jian's conscience and his sense of responsibility to get him back into the fold.
Many times, words are deliberately taken out of context intentionally or otherwise to support a point of view; therefore, skewing the words’ intent. If this statement, “ i'm "xing ji ru feng" (about to die of worry) now. so if you're a man (nan zi han), go back with me “ is read just by itself, then, maybe it does connote an impression of a self-centered Erkang.
However, let's put that statement back into its right context.
The scene summary:
Erkang runs after Xiao Jian. Xiao Jian is seen playing the flute nonchalantly. Xiao Jian puts down his flute and sighs upon seeing Erkang’s approach. His immediate rebuke to Erkang for leaving the others belies his seemingly insouciance.
Xiao Jian: “ Why did you come after me? That carriage over there is loaded with the youngs and the olds, who have little self-defence. With you here, what if something happened to them? Who will protect them? Also, Zi Wei’s eyes just got better. And now there’s Xiao Ge Zi, to boot. Go back!”
(Note1: Erkang is not the one to bring up the concern over Zi Wei; Xiao Jian did.
Note2: Who will protect them? Certainly not Yong Qi who is so out of his element. A sense of urgency here.)
Erkang comments on the fact that Xiao Jian’s actions may be insouciant but his feelings are certainly not. That there’s no way he (Xiao Jian) could just turn his back on his friends. These are well-placed jabs on Xiao Jian’s conscience. Erkang is going to play Xiao Jian’s conscience against his pride. “Well, well, looks like your feelings are not as insouciant as your actions. Eh?”
This jab gives Xiao Jian an opening to voice his grievances, which he did. Erkang blithely brushes aside Xiao Jian's complaint of Yong Qi’s rudeness and jealousy as a temporary illness. “Well, he’s like a porcupine when it comes to XYZ. His ‘sickness” is here today but gone tomorrow. Pay no attention to him.”
Erkang then probes Xiao Jian’s feelings for Xiao Yan Zi. Xiao Jian’s honest response convinced Erkang of his sincerity and trustworthiness. Any lingering doubts that Erkang might have had about Xiao Jian’s ulterior motives are obliterated. Erkang’s main objective, now as was then, is to get Xiao Jian back. His leadership and friendship means too much to the group. Erkang picks his words very carefully and shrewdly; using persuasive words and scenarios so as to prick XJ’s conscience and sense of responsibility.
Erkang: “Xiao Jian, come back! If you abandoned us, Xian Yan Zi will be so upset that she will break up with Yong Qi. Then your sin would be enormous. Moreover, we truly can’t do without you. You’ re our pillar of support.”
Then Erkang, forgoing ‘face’ and showing his sincerity, bows down to Xiao Jian and begs him not to leave. Although Xiao Jian is much placated, he still hesitates. His fury still controls his emotion, overriding such feelings of friendship and responsibility. But Erkang senses Xiao Jian's softening. Again, picking his words with care, Erkang echoes Xiao Jian’s first rebuke. He craftily throws Xiao Jian's words and anxiety back at him.
Erkang echoes: “Please, Xiao Da Xia, that carriage over there, loaded with the youngs and the olds, who have little self-defence..…as for me, I've promised that I will never let Ziwei out of my sight again. Right now, I’m filled with anxiety, worrying that something might happen to them. If you are a man, stop grappling, and swallows those aggravations. “
Their anxieties are one and the same, as are their goals, which is to get the group safely to Dali. Erkang brings up his promise to Ziwei to emphasize the urgency of the situation, not as a self-absorption over Ziwei. By stating his own anxiety, Erkang is subtlely reminding Xiao Jian of recent disastrous events, and the urgency of their situation. And that no matter how you cut it, Xiao Jian is the only one who could get the group to Dali safely. Remember, they have a dream. Xiao Jian, as a leader, cannot afford to throw a tantrum, which he is doing right now, despite good reasons. But a true man puts aside trivial aggravations and personal differences, and sees the big picture. And Xiao Jian is not only a true man, but also a Da Xia. His sense of responsiblity finally doused his fury for he has a dream .........in Dali.