[Bangs]

Originally Posted by JamesG

I'll punish myself by going to the Actress Thread.

Punish yourself by going to the actors thread instead. Those fangirls will drive you nuts.

[JamesG]

Procrastinating is so easy and only guilt can overcome it.
Chapter 23 is up.

[dgfds01]

Chapter 23

The strike he received from Ouyang Feng had penetrated to the bone; although the vital point had already been eased, the internal injury had actually worsened.
acupoint had been unsealed

Although the pain lessened somewhat, his asthma was just as bad as before.
breathing was as laboured as before

Huang Rong replied tearfully, “Master, please sat it.”
Should be 'say'. But better to replace it with 'tell us'.

Zhou Botong interrupted, “That ‘Old Poison’ is a disgrace. Because of him old Senior is at the point of death. To deceive ‘Old Poison’ you have already played dead once before. Wouldn’t you say, that for a person to die twice is delightful? Old Beggar, you go right ahead and die and don’t worry about a thing. I will go and kill him to get revenge for you.”
Mistranslated. According to the online version (roughly): Before he died, my martial brother (shige) had to fake his death because of Old poison. One person has to die twice, isn't he satisfied?
-- I'm not 100% sure I got teh bit in italics right. The Chinese text can't be literally translated and I think that's an appropriate approximation of what he said.

They arrived in front of the inn and saw two desks under the eaves, on top of which lay an extremely thick lair of dust.
tables

She took a closer look and saw the bowl was covered with many layers of rust; it was an iron bowl.
that the

Huang Rong thought out loud, “Is it possible that this is a hideout inn? That Sha Gu could be pretending to be insane.”
The Chinese words translate into 'illegal shop' or something like that. I'm not sure what exactly a 'hideout inn' means.

Huang Rong smiled slightly and nodded her head. Zhou Botong was very happy; he found two pine branches, lit them, and deodorized the dark hidden room for a long time. The deodorized room still emitted a very foul odor.
I don't think deodorized is an accurate translation... I don't know the Chinese word actually used (both my dictionary and the online one translates it as a type of fungus ), there might be a mistake in the online text. But from the context, I gather that it should be: fumigated the dark room for a long time to get rid of the foul stench.

“I truly think that girl is retarded; it will be difficult to get any information from her. Perhaps we can investigate the small amount of evidences we have here on our own,” Huang Rong suggested.
the little evidence

On the backside of the medallion, there were several engraved characters that read ‘by royal decree bestowed on the loyal martial arts master responsible for defending the state, special guard Shi Yanming’.
back
By

They thought the key to this mystery must be hidden inside the iron chest; they removed the skeleton laying on top of the chest and opened the lid.
lying

Altogether there were more than twenty scrolls and not a single one had not originated from the pen of a famous artist.
brush

Several scrolls were calligraphy and paintings by Hui Zong; several others were the penmanship of contemporary artists.
Huizong, the second last emperor of the Northern Song Dynasty and captured in the Jingkang Disgrace that gave Guo Jing his name. He was very skilled at painting and calligraphy, not so much at ruling.
The Chinese translates as calligraphy and paintings.
Suggested rewording: Several scrolls were calligraphy and paintings by Huizong, while several others were by contemporary artists.

The palace guards stationed in front of the gate had noticed these three people, one old and two young, with a mule cart making noises in front of the Imperial Palace gate. Four guards with axes in their hands had already stepped forward with a menacing look on their faces.
menacing looks

During the spring when Huang Rong left home to go north, she visited Lin’an [Hangzhou] for one day; but that city was too close to Peach Blossom Island and she was afraid her father might find her here.
---I think this has been mentioned in an earlier chapter. Even if we want to put another note in, it should be at the first time Lin'an is mentioned at the beginning of the chapter rather than now.

The man replied, “This is the most splendid work of Yu Guobao in the year of Chun Xi. That year Emperor Gao Zong Tai Shang came to drink wine; he saw the work and praised it greatly.
--- Refers to the first emperor of the Southern Song.
The Chinese words are 'Gaozong Taishang Huang'. Gaozong is his temple name, Taishang Huang is a title to an emperor who has abdicated, meaning that he was no longer ruling when the incident occured.
So it is more accurately the Retired Emperor Gaozong.

The man then said, “Yu Guobao originally intended to write ‘Comeback tomorrow bringing the remnants of the wine’. The Tai Shang Emperor smiled and said,
--- As above.

Guo Jing listened and became angry. He yelled loudly, “This emperor Guo Zong put Qin Gui in an important position in order to harm and kill Master Yue [General Yue Fei]!”
Gaozong

Both the customers and the wine shop keeper scrambled out the shop.
out of the

Guo Jing and Huang Rong stood up and they pounded and smashed all the wine vats, pots and cauldrons. Finally, using the ‘Eighteen-Dragon Subduing Palms’, Guo Jing exerted all his strength to strike the main support pillar of the inn, causing the roof to collapse. In a brief moment, a large restaurant was transformed into a pile of wood that hardly resembling anything.
---- does anyone else feel sorry for the shop owner?

The couple leisurely walked along the lakeshore and saw poems everywhere…on rocks, on trees, on pavilions and on the walls. They were either by travelers bidding their farewells, or young men expressing their love.
lake-shore

Guo Jing and Huang Rong were very shocked. They grabbed each other’s hands and hid even deeper behind the fake hill, not daring to make any noises.
a sound

They heard Wanyan Honglie speak again, still in low voice, “The Little Prince has carefully examined the secret letter Yue Fei left behind and also examined the documents from dynasties two emperors Gao Zong and Xiao Zong. I concluded that the Wumu Legacy is hidden fifteen steps east of the ‘Jade-Green Cold Hall’.”
[b]Gaozong
Xiaozong[/B

That is the reason warriors who cultivate internal energy will always find a secluded and inhabited mountain or field, or at least close their doors and not leave, or have a skilled and powerful master or friend protecting from the sidelines to avoid their training going astray.
uninhabited
prevent

End of Chapter 23

[JamesG]

dgfds01:
When I saw your super-quick respose this morning I had a vision of you with a big 'I'll put a little pressure on James for a change' grin on your face.

[dgfds01]

Originally Posted by JamesG

dgfds01:
When I saw your super-quick respose this morning I had a vision of you with a big 'I'll put a little pressure on James for a change' grin on your face.

You're pretty much right. It's funny to have you procrastinating instead...

[mleung]

Pardon my ignorance, but when you mean a certain chapter is "up," where is it? I'm curious because as of now, I can only assist in editing what other people have edited & that seems a bit redundant to me. Thanks!

[mleung]

never mind - i found it!

[JamesG]

Originally Posted by mleung

never mind - i found it!

I never thought to mention that I just replace the chapter on the first page with the latest one. It saves a lot of space that way.

[mleung]

So I finally finished my edits for chapter 23. Sorry it took so long. I think I can more fully appreciate translators now, since if it took me this long to do a chapter, I can't imagine how long it would take to translate! Anyway, my edits are attached as word documents, since there were too many to justify posting. I even had to split it up into two parts! Most of it consists of corrections regarding semi-colons. They are a pet peeve of mine, but feel free to ignore what you want. Hope this helps!

[Bangs]

Originally Posted by mleung

So I finally finished my edits for chapter 23. Sorry it took so long. I think I can more fully appreciate translators now, since if it took me this long to do a chapter, I can't imagine how long it would take to translate! Anyway, my edits are attached as word documents, since there were too many to justify posting. I even had to split it up into two parts! Most of it consists of corrections regarding semi-colons. They are a pet peeve of mine, but feel free to ignore what you want. Hope this helps!

Thanks mleung. Your help is very much appreciated.

Will catch up with you guys by monday.

[JamesG]

Originally Posted by Bangs

Thanks mleung. Your help is very much appreciated.

Will catch up with you guys by monday.

Roger that Bangs.

mleung Check your PMs.

[Bangs]

Chapter 23:

The strike he received from Ouyang Feng had penetrated to the bone; although the vital point had already been eased, the internal injury had actually worsened.
bone. Although

Huang Rong replied tearfully, “Master, please sat it.”
say

Zhou Botong said, “You have neither wine nor foods here…what kind of shop are you running?”
food

Huang Rong suspicions about Sha Gu’s martial arts roots became stronger.
Huang Rong's

Speaking to this point she suddenly dashed out the room.
out of

Guo Jing grew up on the steppes; not only he had never seen these kinds of treasures, he had never even heard of them.
had he

When the Song government moved south it was established as the new capital.
south,

Both the customers and the wine shop keeper scrambled out the shop.
out of

Guo Jing was angry and broken hearted; he wished he could go over and grab him and ask for explanation.
for an

Below the porch she saw some the stairs leading up surrounded by all kinds of flowers, ‘jasmine’ [mo li], ‘fragrant vegetable’ [su xin], ‘musk deer fragrant rattan’ [she xiang teng], ‘vermillion hibiscus’ [shu jin], ‘jade cassia’ [yu gui], and ‘red banana’ [hong jiao]; all were the kinds of fragrant plants that bloom in summer.
some

“Damn his granny!” Hou Tonghai cursed, “My butt is broken in four pieces from the fall.”
into

Huang Rong just about to go out through the hole behind the waterfall when they suddenly heard a loud grunt and a great burst of energy came through the waterfall from the outside.
was just

Guo Jing was determined that no matter what he had to do guard the entrance, he would not let the enemy enter.
to


Chapter done.

[JamesG]

Thanks Bangs. Now I've got to get caught-up.
Darn windy tonight with gusts up to 65+mph / 106kmph.

[encoish]

What happened? Did everyone just DIE? Or maybe it's pasteurellosis infection? Hmm... there must be an overgrowing population of diseased bunnies somewhere...

[Bangs]

Originally Posted by encoish

What happened? Did everyone just DIE? Or maybe it's pasteurellosis infection? Hmm... there must be an overgrowing population of diseased bunnies somewhere...

What are you talking about? Maybe you got the wrong thread, this is the corrections page.We updated this thread every once in a while.

[JamesG]

Originally Posted by Bangs

What are you talking about? Maybe you got the wrong thread, this is the corrections page.We updated this thread every once in a while.

If you take a look at the comment by encoish in the ROCH series thread you'll understand. We have a new 'Troll'.

[encoish]

Oh, I see. Troll? I don't consider myself being a troll, neither do others. Or do you mean troll in another sense? I'm confused. Anyway, I wanted to read the translation of LOCH without nonsensical phrases and mistakes, so I'm waiting for the corrections to be done. I can't help, because I'm lazy. And I mean can't, because my laziness gets in front of everything. It's a wall. A wall that's covered with blood from my own head.

(I haven't read it; I don't want to read any spoilers)

[Bangs]

Originally Posted by encoish

Oh, I see. Troll? I don't consider myself being a troll, neither do others. Or do you mean troll in another sense? I'm confused. Anyway, I wanted to read the translation of LOCH without nonsensical phrases and mistakes, so I'm waiting for the corrections to be done. I can't help, because I'm lazy. And I mean can't, because my laziness gets in front of everything. It's a wall. A wall that's covered with blood from my own head.

(I haven't read it; I don't want to read any spoilers)

No one is calling you a troll. BTW, we can't give all of our time to the corrections, we all have our jobs to do and doing the corrections is just a sacrifice in our part to contribute to these novels that we love to read. Besides, we are not 100% sure we got rid of all the inconsistencies and errors in the translation so what you will read will still contain some errors here and there. If you can't wait for the corrections, just read the unedited translation. The translators have given their best to bring you the novel in english format, the least you can do is show them your appreciation by reading their work.

[encoish]

No, no, that is not really what I meant. I am ever grateful for everyone's work on this, thus I blame myself for not helping. And I still don't get that troll phrase. Confusing indeed.

[JamesG]

Here's your answer: http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Internet_troll



Chapter 24 is up.