Is Guo Jing the most suitable lover/husband to Huang Rong?

[rabadi]

I can't help it. I have to comment. Why would HR's ability to cook well make ZWJ more suitable than GJ as HR's husband/lover?

Yeah, I would have thought that wkeej would say Xiao Zhao was the best lover for ZWJ

BTW, how did the question on whether GJ was the most suitable lover/husband to HR suddenly became a question on whether GJ was a lousy father or not?

[kidd]

In the novel, it was explained by Jin Yong that when Guo Xiang was born, her parents were in mortal danger, due to the bad memories they subconsciously developed negative feelings towards Guo Xiang.

But wasn't GPL born at the same time (only a few minutes apart) as GX? So, why the parents only have negative feelings towards GX?
You said parents, so, does that mean HR also love GX the least?

Subconciously or not, they r still lousy parents if they love GX the least because of things out of her control.

[babyblues]

Haha. so funny, you guys. The topic is going all over the place, what with ZWJ coming into the picture then GX being the least loved. I'm quite interested in the 2nd topic actually. Is there a basis for that statement? Someone start a new thread!

Hey, Yang Ming, Thanx for defending my views. Heehee. You seem to be doing that quite a bit. Anyway, I was really tired and caught up with work recently to reply and defend myself. Even now, i'm really tired from the weekend to do a detailed reply. But ishall try (and risking another lengthy reply from Ken )

I am not a young teenage girl. I think I can consider myself grown up already
But doesn't mean I don't wish for additional tenderness, love, romance from my other half. I am not saying that I am blaming GJ for being a nice guy, Ken. What I meant was GJ is an overall nice guy so he treats everyone the same, so doesn't seem different for HR. All girls and women wish to be treated slightly better than others by the love of their life. Otherwise you won't feel cherished or loved. That's why in Meteor Garden, I love Dao Ming Si (hope you guys watched it and know what I'm talking about). Here we have a guy who is grouchy, mean, bullies other people. And you generally will dislike him. But the way he treats his girl is entirely different. He gives in to her, thinks for her, loves her and she is no. 1 priority in his life. Which girl wouldn't swoon? (At least not me )

I don't doubt GJ loves HR. It's just that if I was HR, I think I feel I am not the most important in his life. And knowing HR, she doesn't care about everyone else except the pple she loves, i.e. Her dad, GJ and herself. To love GJ, she became willing to change to be concerned about everyone as well. In return, she got his misunderstanding. Sure, GJ didn't kill her to avenge his teachers. But the mere fact that he did not want to associate with her anymore, despite all they had gone thro, would have surely caused her a lot of pain.

Yes, GJ did not want to marry HZ himself. That's why I also said it's because he gave his word. But poor HR is the one who suffers in misery. Sure, he is a committed man, man of his word blah blah. But I guess I am carrying the modern prejudice that as long as not married, can still break off lor. And marriage is not just about giving your word but also whether you love and willing to commit to that person. If you marry just because you said so before but there's no love, what's the point? Aren't you tying the other party (HZ) to a lifetime of lovelessness? And he actually said he'll marry HZ once he is sure HR is safe. cos of guilt. He realised he had wronged her. I mean, if I was HR, I'd be damn exasperated. First he thinks my dad killed his teachers despite all I say. Nvm, since he is naturally upset and angry. I will swallow and accept all his angry words to try to find out the truth and so things will be alright again. I risk my life to save his remaining teacher and at last managed to escape unharmed from OUyang Feng and I am looking forward to reuniting with GJ since he knows now I'm not to blame. But when I find him, I realise he says that once he sees me, he'll marry HZ. Can you imagine the hurt and sorrow HR has gone thro?

I'm not saying that GJ did not do anything for HR at all. Of course he was there beside her during her troubles etc. Of course he was concerned about her life. But I guess what I'm saying is it's not enough to make me feel that he deserves her.

As for the cooking, Yang Ming has said what I was thinking. Of course he eats her cooking but the thing is he can't even tell if it's exquisite food or just normal food. To him, as long as it fills his stomache that's good enough. What a waste of good food! It's not a matter of praising HR.

As for the intelligence thing, yes, not always hereditary. But i think the odds are there. Huang Yao Shi and his wife both very intelligent and HR is born also very intelligent. Anyway, I don't think Yang Tiexin and Bao Xiruo were dumb. Yang Tiexin was actually quite a smart man, except he didn't have the benefit of education. Bao Xiruo came from a family that emphasized on education, right? scholar or something. Don't know how to translate.

I think I answered all already. This is just how I feel. I like GJ as a hero, but not as a lover. I think I even prefer Yang Guo as a lover cos you can see he places Xiao Long Nu in top spot in his life although I can't stand his grouchiness and the overly dramatic events in their lives like separating, reuniting, being poisoned, being cured, being poisoned again, being cured, separating, reuniting (repeat a few more times

[space_cadet]

i'll give my view in two parts as i define husband and lover differently.

first, whether GJ is the most suitable husband for HR. i would say of course. apart from the stupid "if they were not married, there wouldn't be ROCH and HSDS" reason, i think they suit each other well. HR will be able to provide GJ with care in the physical (not what you'll be thinking, i mean the daily needs of a human body such as foods, rest, cleaning, leisure, etc) and emotional needs. not to say HR could provide GJ what he lacks (i.e. a good brain) and she understand GJ deeply. a most perfect wife. in the other hand GJ would be able to provide HR with security and companionship (a single child brought up by a single parent who is a weirdo needs this twice as much) and also care, love and take care of household needs (i doubt this, since heroes were not remunerated for heroic deeds). and he pampered HR a lot (more so when they're courting). so to answer the question, a yes to support the agenda of whether GJ was a good husband or not.

second, i would say GJ was a lousy lover. he is dull, uncompassionate, unromantic, insensitive and too uptight. he is bad at sweet words, do not understand women and women's emotional requirements in a relationship and unable to cope with sudden mood swings of women. and to think their sexual life.........sheesh.

but bear in mind, there's an old saying that nothing is perfect. so in a healthy relationship of a man and his wife, one has to compromise and try.

[Arching_Hero]

Guo Jing undoubtly is a good husband to Huang Rong. He is loyal to Huang Rong, he can protect Huang Rong and I think he can fullfill Huang Rong's needs.

Yeah, Guo Jing is the most suitable lover to Huang Rong because Huang Rong loves him with all her heart. Guo Jing also loves Huang Rong but he did not need to good at sweet words or being romantic. He just show his love to Huan Rong in other way that only Huang Rong can understand how & when Guo Jing show his love.

[Laviathan]

But wasn't GPL born at the same time (only a few minutes apart) as GX? So, why the parents only have negative feelings towards GX?
You said parents, so, does that mean HR also love GX the least?

Both Huang Rong and Guo Jing love Guo Xiang the least of all three children.

Guo Polu was a boy, and Huang Rong really wanted to have a male child to continue the Guo Family bloodline. Furthermore, Polu was said to be very much like his dad (very obedient), so that may be the reasons.

[Exodus]

Really i thought they loved GX the most since she was the most talented and smart of the three.

Good husband but i think she could have done better, anyway she was really happy with GJ and that is the most important thing

[Yon]

I don't care

I agree. Do I care enough to nose into somebody's love business, i don't think so. But if I become the Moster Granny, and butt into HR's love life, my answer is, absolutely no. Guo Jing is most unattractive charactor to my eyes. He maybe hero to some people's eyes, but to me, he is boring, stubborn and down right stupid at times. He doubted HR because of his sifus. If I were HR, I would not forgive that loser! I will throw him to my torture chamber any time.

[rabadi]

Well, I'm biased towards GJ, so of course I'll say he is absolutely the best for Huang Rong. That being said, I think they complement each other nicely. I also learnt from postings in this SPCNet forum in the past that opposite attracts. That's why my thread on SPT and XLN being a couple did not work

[Zhuge Liang]

P/S: Love is rarely rational... Um, how can you conclude that they complemented each other so well?

Why not? I was merely remarking their respective characteristics and personalities seemed to complement each other well as a couple.

Love may be not be rational but one can still comment on areas in which their relationship operated rationally since you seem to be using rational arguments regarding their compatibilty i thought i'd present you with some.

Eg. His Charisma, her intellect

HR herself obviously decided he was most suitable. You perspective seems to be that of a parent - whereby no one seems to be quite good enough because you love them so much.

[Yang Ming]

I was merely remarking their respective characteristics and personalities seemed to complement each other well as a couple.
Eg. His Charisma, her intellect

His Charisma only developed after they went to Xiang Yang. Before that, he was merely a fighter.

HR herself obviously decided he was most suitable. You perspective seems to be that of a parent - whereby no one seems to be quite good enough because you love them so much.

Maybe.
However, it's good that your sister likes to go shopping so you can surf net freely, but it is not good that your wife does so. Do you get what I mean?

[Yang Ming]

Here are my analysises
What would have happened if Guo Jing hadn't come?
Huang Yao Shi would never have forced Huang Rong marry Ou Yang Ke!

Frankly, I think you're putting the cart before the horse in many of your arguments. It's also called "begging the question", which sounds persuasive until you really think about it.

East Heretic Wong Yerk See's decision to betroth Wong Yung to Au Yeung Hak was made independently of what Wong Yerk See thought of Gwok Jing. Wong Yerk See had decided that Wong Yung was at the age that she needed to marry, and Au Yeung Hak seemed the ideal candidate: he was her true equal in social status (blood descendant of a Great).

Ha ha ha!
Let's see who put the cart before the horse.

He risked life and limb going to Peach Blossom Island to challenge the Au Yeungs for her hand in marriage.

_ Firstly,who said that?
Jin Yong wrote that the reason Guo Jing came to Peach Blossom Island is to sole the conflict between his 7 teachers and Huang Yao Shi.
Neither he or Huang Rong did know that Huang Yao Shi had engaged Huang Rong with Ou Yang Ke.

_ Secondly, East Heretic Huang Yao Shi's decision to betroth Huang Rong to Ou Yang Ke was made independently, right. But it doesn't mean he would definitely force Huang Rong to marry Ou Yang Ke and Huang Rong would rather die than marry him.
( and I 100% sure that Ming Pao's newspaper house would be burned if Jin Yong did so )

_ Thirdly, who were the one who protested that engagement?
_ Huang Rong: sneak-attacked and harmed Ou Yang Ke, and Guo Jing had a lot advantage because of this.
_Hong Qi Gong: protested the engagement and begged for his students' marriage.
_Guo Jing: pretty sad, hiding in the bushes until was detected and pulled out by Huang Yao Shi.

[Yang Ming]

i'll give my view in two parts as i define husband and lover differently.

but bear in mind, there's an old saying that nothing is perfect. so in a healthy relationship of a man and his wife, one has to compromise and try.

Yes, and by trying to be perfect, better human changes.
It's weird that someone defines spouse and lover differently.
Will there be a time when you love someone but don't marry him but marry another husband-style guy?

[Laviathan]

Guo Jing may or may not be the most suitable lover/husband to Huang Rong, but Huang Rong is surely the ideal lover/wife to Guo Jing.

[Yang Ming]

"Huang Rong is surely the ideal lover/wife to Guo Jing" this is undeniable .
But "Guo Jing may or may not be the most suitable lover/husband to Huang Rong", may or may not?
Come on, say your point of view!

[Laviathan]

Well, as novel characters, Huang Rong was clearly intended to match Guo Jing perfectly. He is honest and honorable to a fault, while she is cunning and smart. Without Huang Rong, Guo Jing cannot make LOCH work. HSDS without Zhao Min could still work, it would become a different story but it can still be interesting. Same goes for ROCH, Yang Guo is the one who makes the story work. Dragon Girl alone could not do this, while novel-wise Yang guo does not really need Dragon Girl.

Guo Jing really needs Huang Rong, while Huang Rong does not necessary need Guo Jing. She can operate very well on her own, which she does in both LOCH and ROCH. So, I don't think Guo Jing is the most suitable lover/husband to Huang Rong as a NOVEL CHARACTER, while Huang Rong is surely the ideal lover/wife to Guo Jing.

But if we treat the two of them as real human beings, well than I truly cannot say. Who am I to judge who is and who isn't suitable to be one's lover? Huang Rong loves Guo Jing very much and she is extremely happy with him. That's good enough for me.

[Zhuge Liang]

Maybe.
However, it's good that your sister likes to go shopping so you can surf net freely, but it is not good that your wife does so. Do you get what I mean?

What the heck does that mean??

[Yang Ming]

I got your opinion, Laviathan.
Whether Guo Jing is suitable for Huang Rong or not, she has chosen him as the man of her life because she loves him and wanna be with him. She's very happy when he's around and loves him more than herself, love him so much that she could sacrifice for him. I sympathize with her decision,hence, feel a little pity for her.
So does Yang Guo, he chooses Xiao Long Nu not because she is the most suitable girl for him, but because she was the most important girl for him, the one who had taken care of him when he was young and lived her life for him and can't live without him.

Sometime, we, human, just like those wuxia characters, would marry some ones not because they are the most suitable for us, but because they are the ones we should marry.
That's why I said, Guo Jing got a lot of luck, to have a chance meet her, to get helped from her, to be her partner on a journey and finally to be chosen as her man.

[Yang Ming]

What the heck does that mean??

Man. I mean complement is not always good, it's good that if your lover is good at chem and you are good at math, toghether you'll get high score in math and chem but you can't talk with each other about your interest.
Hope you got a girl friend when you were in schools , or I'll need to use another example

[Candide]

All this lengthy discussion... It's because opposites attract, that's all. As for people like Yon who keep going on about GJ being stupid...well, surprise, surprise, any other male would look stupid next to Huang Rong. A person who happily admits that he's dumb (but could achieve greatness) like GJ would be perfect for her, instead of some pseudo-intellectual who thinks he's top shit.

EOD - end of discussion.