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Thread: Wuxia bloopers that never happen, but would be hilarious if they did...

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    Moderator Ken Cheng's Avatar
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    Default Wuxia bloopers that never happen, but would be hilarious if they did...

    Certain wuxia bloopers never occur, but would probably be hilarious if they did.

    Imagine, for example, a Beggar's Union Chief using the Dog Beating Stick Technique in a duel against a powerful enemy. Everything is going along fine, with the Union Chief reciting the verbal formula that goes along with the technique. Then, in mid-stroke, the Chief stops maneuvering the stick and begins scratching his head, muttering, "Crap! I forgot how the rest of the formula goes!"

    The way I see it in my head, it's funny.

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    Senior Member ChanceEncounter's Avatar
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    Wardrobe malfunction.

    Banana peel.

    I thought it would have been funny if ZWJ had a photographic memory and couldn't forget what ZSF showed him of taiji.

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    Farting.

    Farting when they have to circulate qi. Farting is always funny.

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    Senior Member PJ's Avatar
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    Don't forget B: Burping.

    Imagine if after Yang Guo and Xiao Longnu finally meet after 16 long years. They rush to embrace each other with tears. Then, Gugu caresses Guo'er face endearingly, saying: "Do you know how I much I missed you? Every day I BRRRRRR."

    "Oh Guo'er, I got too excited from seeing you. You don't mind, do you?"
    忽见柳荫下两个小孩子在哀哀痛哭,瞧模样正是武敦儒、武修文兄弟。郭芙大声叫道:「喂,你们在干甚麽?」武 修文回头见是郭芙,哭道:「我们在哭,你不见麽?」

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    Moderator Ren Wo Xing's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by ChanceEncounter View Post
    Wardrobe malfunction.

    Banana peel.

    I thought it would have been funny if ZWJ had a photographic memory and couldn't forget what ZSF showed him of taiji.
    Wardrobe malfunctions happen ALL the time in Gulong.
    Read the latest chapters of Coiling Dragon at Wuxia World!

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    Senior Member ChanceEncounter's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Ren Wo Xing View Post
    Wardrobe malfunctions happen ALL the time in Gulong.
    Yes, but most of them relatively intentional or as a result of some action.

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    Moderator Ken Cheng's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by PJ View Post
    Don't forget B: Burping.

    Imagine if after Yang Guo and Xiao Longnu finally meet after 16 long years. They rush to embrace each other with tears. Then, Gugu caresses Guo'er face endearingly, saying: "Do you know how I much I missed you? Every day I BRRRRRR."

    "Oh Guo'er, I got too excited from seeing you. You don't mind, do you?"
    I would totally like these two characters so much better if Jin Yong had allowed that to happen.

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    In ROCH83, two taoists from Quanzhen (I think) were about to fight Luk Wu Shuang. Yeung Gor thought it was Little Dragon Girl they were coming after. So he broke their swords.

    The next day when they were about to show LWS some moves, their swords were broken in half. And no, too bad they are not as gifted as Broken Sword from "Hero".

    If this in the novel or just a TVB creation? If so, should this count as a blooper somewhat.

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    Quote Originally Posted by Felix View Post
    In ROCH83, two taoists from Quanzhen (I think) were about to fight Luk Wu Shuang. Yeung Gor thought it was Little Dragon Girl they were coming after. So he broke their swords.

    The next day when they were about to show LWS some moves, their swords were broken in half. And no, too bad they are not as gifted as Broken Sword from "Hero".

    If this in the novel or just a TVB creation? If so, should this count as a blooper somewhat.
    The opening paragraph of ROCH chapter 8.

    Yang Guo quietly opened the window and slipped inside the room of the
    two Taoists. He saw two bags on the bed, he lifted one up and felt its
    weight, there were about twenty taels of silver and thought, “Just what
    I need for traveling expenses.” He took it and placed it into his
    pocket. The other bag was around four feet long; it held two long
    swords. He took each one out separately and easily snapped the two
    swords; then placed each back into their sheath. He then wrapped the
    swords up. He was about to leave the room when another thought crossed
    his mind, he took off his trousers and urinated all over the Taoists’
    quilts and blankets.

    One blooper that did actually happen was when Zhou Botong ran away from Yinggu in chapter 40 of LOCH, crying out that he needed a dump and thus needed to go away to a private place. When he saw that Yinggu was following him, he was so scared that he soiled himself.

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    Senior Member AnhHung's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by pannonian View Post
    The opening paragraph of ROCH chapter 8.
    Yang Guo quietly opened the window and slipped inside the room of the
    two Taoists. He saw two bags on the bed, he lifted one up and felt its
    weight, there were about twenty taels of silver and thought, “Just what
    I need for traveling expenses.” He took it and placed it into his
    pocket. The other bag was around four feet long; it held two long
    swords. He took each one out separately and easily snapped the two
    swords; then placed each back into their sheath. He then wrapped the
    swords up. He was about to leave the room when another thought crossed
    his mind, he took off his trousers and urinated all over the Taoists’
    quilts and blankets.
    One blooper that did actually happen was when Zhou Botong ran away from Yinggu in chapter 40 of LOCH, crying out that he needed a dump and thus needed to go away to a private place. When he saw that Yinggu was following him, he was so scared that he soiled himself.
    YG is a thief
    You do know that it is just fiction, dont you?

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    think everytime some guy impales his own hand/wrist on LHC's sword, thats a blooper right there.

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