Questions for the guys

[KeongJai]

Well if it is a domestic dispute, then that is different. I asked if the girl did NOT know those guys at all and they are trying to court her?? Would you guys do anything about it??

but HOW would a passerby know that they don't know each other?

No struggle + no shouting for help or telling them to leave her alone = assumption that they know each other + are just having a domestic.

[Trinie]

but HOW would a passerby know that they don't know each other?

No struggle + no shouting for help or telling them to leave her alone = assumption that they know each other + are just having a domestic.

That is a good question.. Hm.. I think there are cases that you would know.. Like the way they interact is a good clue... I think people would interact differently if they knew someone versus someone that they don't know at all.. I think there are other ways of knowing too...

[Trinie]

I'll just watch. Women are equal to men now. You girls can take care of yourself.

I don't see any woman rushing to a man's defense when he's verbally attacked or emotionally abused by other women.

Hey, that is true to an extent, BUT men are still generally physically stronger... I would help a guy that is in trouble even though people will say that I am nosing into other's business. However, I don't care since I don't feel it is right for a girl to hurt a guy either(whether it be physical or verbal).

[Yeung Gor]

It really depends where this occur, if it's some public place, then there is no need to rush to rescue her (doesn't matter how she looks). Usually, the girl can handle it herself and the guys can't do anything serious in a public place.

Now if this was in some dark alley, where it occurs and I'm the only witness, then of course I'll do something, first I'll call the police on my cell phone, so to get some backup if things go down.

I had an incident once similar to this, I was out fishing one night, and walking home, every place was closing down, people coming out of the bar drunk. I walked through this small street and saw a girl being harrass by a guy. I didn't know what's going on but he was getting pretty aggressive with her. So I instinctively call the cops, gave them the location. Then proceed to tell the guy to calm down and that I already call the cops. He was still drunk and pissed. I was ready to beat him with my fishing pole, if he tries to make a move. As they kept arguing I figure out they knew each other, and what had happen was the girl took his car and drove it somewhere and ditched it. He wanted his car back, that's why he was pissed. The girl was totally drunk and can't even figure out where she drop it. Then the cops showed up, and thought I was the assailant, and order to drop the weapon (my fishing pole lol). I droped it to the floor, and they can and grab me. I told them hey got the wrong guy, he's over there. So finally they sorted it out and released me. I picked up my fishing pole and was on my way home. I didn't catch any fish that night but it was quite interesting.

[Trinie]

It really depends where this occur, if it's some public place, then there is no need to rush to rescue her (doesn't matter how she looks). Usually, the girl can handle it herself and the guys can't do anything serious in a public place.

Now if this was in some dark alley, where it occurs and I'm the only witness, then of course I'll do something, first I'll call the police on my cell phone, so to get some backup if things go down.

I had an incident once similar to this, I was out fishing one night, and walking home, every place was closing down, people coming out of the bar drunk. I walked through this small street and saw a girl being harrass by a guy. I didn't know what's going on but he was getting pretty aggressive with her. So I instinctively call the cops, gave them the location. Then proceed to tell the guy to calm down and that I already call the cops. He was still drunk and pissed. I was ready to beat him with my fishing pole, if he tries to make a move. As they kept arguing I figure out they knew each other, and what had happen was the girl took his car and drove it somewhere and ditched it. He wanted his car back, that's why he was pissed. The girl was totally drunk and can't even figure out where she drop it. Then the cops showed up, and thought I was the assailant, and order to drop the weapon (my fishing pole lol). I droped it to the floor, and they can and grab me. I told them hey got the wrong guy, he's over there. So finally they sorted it out and released me. I picked up my fishing pole and was on my way home. I didn't catch any fish that night but it was quite interesting.

Thanks for sharing your story.. Gosh, I guess things can be more complicated than we think.The people in your story were drunk too so it makes things even more complicated. I can't believe that the cops can be so stupid to think that you were the culprit. We try to do a good thing and that's what we get.

Trust me, even in public places, guys can do mean and bad things too. I remember once we when I was in school. There were like 3-4 black guys that tried to harass me... I was in a bad mood too and was not scared of them. Therefore, I just asked them what they wanted and they said some really stupid things... So I just ignored them, then right at that moment.. Some professors walked by so they left... I guess I got lucky...

[xJadedx]

I think calling the cops is probably the best idea in these situations (unless you're a karate expert). Most jerks would leave a girl alone if they see someone else coming.

While Candide put it pretty bluntly, there's some truths to his post, in the sense that girls do need to learn to know some basic self-defense, so that in the case they are confronted by some guys and are all alone, they can do something about it.

Being able to take care of yourself and learning to know when or where you can go alone is very important.

[Yeung Gor]

Thanks for sharing your story.. Gosh, I guess things can be more complicated than we think.The people in your story were drunk too so it makes things even more complicated. I can't believe that the cops can be so stupid to think that you were the culprit. We try to do a good thing and that's what we get.

I don't blame the police, if you saw the guy and me. The guy was clean cut, dress nice. And I'm out fishing so I had a black beanie and raggy coat on, so I look like a mugger. LOL

[Trinie]

I don't blame the police, if you saw the guy and me. The guy was clean cut, dress nice. And I'm out fishing so I had a black beanie and raggy coat on, so I look like a mugger. LOL

Oh so that was why... I guess the way that you are dressed really matters. I guess appearance really matters at times. How did you sort it out in the end for them to let you go??I am curious to know...

[Yeung Gor]

Oh so that was why... I guess the way that you are dressed really matters. I guess appearance really matters at times. How did you sort it out in the end for them to let you go??I am curious to know...

I just told them I'm the one who call them. And they talked to the girl and that guy, so they quickly figure out what's going on. I walk through that area many times so I am used to seeing drunk girls wandering down the streets, I used to ignore them but this time the screaming caught my attention.

That guy was pretty big. Lucky he was drunk, so that balance it a bit if it resorted to a fight. Lucky the police showed up just in time, I didn't have to use my "Sad Palms"

[Trinie]

I just told them I'm the one who call them. And they talked to the girl and that guy, so they quickly figure out what's going on. I walk through that area many times so I am used to seeing drunk girls wandering down the streets, I used to ignore them but this time the screaming caught my attention.

That guy was pretty big. Lucky he was drunk, so that balance it a bit if it resorted to a fight. Lucky the police showed up just in time, I didn't have to use my "Sad Palms"

Luckily they knew right away...Didn't that big guy scare you?? Are you trained in martial arts at all?? I would be scared if I wasn't..I think it is good to know some, but it can cause problems if you don't know how to control yourself.

[Yeung Gor]

Luckily they knew right away...Didn't that big guy scare you?? Are you trained in martial arts at all?? I would be scared if I wasn't..I think it is good to know some, but it can cause problems if you don't know how to control yourself.

Yea.. actually I am trained in martial arts. Done it for a long time. But at that time I was out of practice though. I gave up my practice when I started college. At my current state now, you would think I don't know any martial arts, I would pull a muscle if I try to do any of those kicks I used to do so effortlessly. LOL

[Trinie]

Yea.. actually I am trained in martial arts. Done it for a long time. But at that time I was out of practice though. I gave up my practice when I started college. At my current state now, you would think I don't know any martial arts, I would pull a muscle if I try to do any of those kicks I used to do so effortlessly. LOL

It's cool to know that you were, but then again you have not done it in a long time. However, I think if you have the skill in you, you can easily get it back. Just like with some languages.. I took French for 5 years but never used it. I forgot a lot of it, but I think if I got back to it... I would be able to get it back... But maybe physical skills are different. I used to be able to do the splits and all, but I would not even dare to do it now or else I would pull a muscle...

[galadriel]

If you were just a passerby, would you help the girl? Or would you just walk away and pretend that nothing is happening since it is not your business.

Would you help her just because you are a gentleman??Or would you be scared to help her since she may follow you???

I once passed by a backlane - taking shortcut home. Some guys started to disturb but instead of a passerby, a dishwasher called out roughly "Hey, leave her alone. There some betta chicks round the corner for your night"

He wasn't tactful but I was grateful they took off seeing he bigger and stronger.