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Thread: Sharing about My Family

  1. #1
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    Default Sharing about My Family

    My family is a bit complicated. My late grandma is actually not my grandma and my late dad is not close to her. Here's some background based on what I have gathered in the past. The family members hardly share about our past.

    My mum is the adopted daughter of my grandma. My grandma, though married, is childless. Her husband died during WW2. I heard it is due to hunger. My dad somehow came into this family for reasons I do not know. So my dad and mum got married. Again, since the day I understand things, my dad and grandma did not talk to each other at all, though living under the same roof. My dad actually bought my real grandma (his real mum) to this house once when I was young (probably 12-13 years old) once. I can't remember the details though real grandma looks "modern" in dressing. I also heard that dad has a younger brother, with two kids. The latter also came to the house once. I remembered they bought an electronic car set with tracks for me. It is possibly very expensive in the past. Based on what I have heard, uncle worked as a security guard in his later years.

    To be frank, I do not know whether it is good to know what has happened in the past. For one, grandma treated me very well. She will always give me some little money (usually about fifty cents or so) for my expense during my university days. I am actually very broke during that time (I remember once I have only five cents). Because for dignity reasons, I do not work part-time. My sisters helped me a lot during these days. One of them sponsored my school fees and the other two gave me pocket money.

    My regret is possibly not spending more time with grandma when she is bed-ridden in her later years. My argument is that she is "always" sleeping and what is the point of visiting her (by then, I am married and living outside). Actually, a main reason why I got married is to get out of this house.

    Now, I am feeling angry with myself. Are I an ungrateful and selfish person? I think I will stop here.

  2. #2
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    Now, it is about myself. I have been feeling very down recently due to work stress, health reasons and being a caregiver to my wife. To begin, I must say that I am very grateful to my wife. When we were dating, she has started working whereas I was still studying. So basically, she paid for almost all the expenses of the date. She did not mind my "poorness". Though there was once she did grumble when she paid for a relatively expensive meal and I ate most of the good stuff. Ten years ago, she is diagnosed with obsessive compulsive disorder of cleanliness. And I have to be a participant in her OCD. So basically we have to do a thorough cleaning of our house every day. It is usually 4-5 hours. I get frustrated because of this routine and at times, showed out my anger/frustration. Recently she did ask me a very direct question - is it that I do not want to help her anymore. Very now and then, she mentioned the "divorce"/"suicide" word. Usually, I keep quiet.

  3. #3
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    How can I be less unhappy is the question I have been thinking every day:
    Quit my work - seems impossible as there are bills to be paid.
    Divorce/my own suicide - then who is going to help my wife?

    It seems that the current solution is acceptance. Accept that this is my life. And be contented. And compare less.

  4. #4
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    Quote Originally Posted by wkeej View Post

    It seems that the current solution is acceptance. Accept that this is my life. And be contented. And compare less.
    Contentment is the key to happiness. But it's easier said than done, right? I think it's what most of us are struggling to find.

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