Ci Xi and I

I was having my usual tea with my ladies-in-waiting in the palace garden. Suddenly, I fell ill and had to be taken away to my room by my eunuchs. Imperial doctors were summoned to my room bedside to examine my august health. My sister, Ci Xi was summoned to my bedside. Ci Xi was distraught to find out that I was dying. The doctors confirmed that I would not survive the illness. I, of course, knew about my own health, was resigned to the fact I would no longer be in this world.

" Please leave me with my dearest sister. I want to spend my time with her. I have plenty of things to talk with her."

When the servants left, I turned to Ci Xi and said in a weak voice, “Sister, I am aware that I will not be here any longer. I have to admit that I hate to leave so soon. But, our husband and son are waiting for me and I can feel they are beside me, waiting anxiously to take me away. They even have their eunuchs carrying the phoenix sedan chair, the one used to carry me into the palace on my wedding day.

Sister, promise me one thing: look after our Emperor. He is a weak child but full of will to rule our Ta Qing. He’ll become a great ruler one day. Please teach him to be a great ruler.

We missed our son, Tung Chi after his death. I know that you blamed yourself for being strict to him. Alas, he was born with the destiny to be a ruler. He could not alter his fate and died young before he could practise his lessons. I will ask forgiveness for our failure from our great ancestors when I meet them in the Heaven.”

“No, Sister. You had performed a great job by raising our son but he died young. That was his fate. Alute was the main cause of his death!!..”

“Sister,” said I in a weak but stern voice, “you never admitted that you caused the death of our son and yet you blamed on Alute!!! How can you say that to Alute!! She was carrying our grandson when you stepped her swollen belly!! She was carrying an Aisin Gioro!!”

I could not stop myself from crying but due to the pain I suffered in the stomach, I could only take deep breaths forcing myself speak up to Ci Xi. I had never done that before this. Realising that I would not survive anymore, I had to finish what I had started.

“Ci Xi, I am aware that my time is up now. Please, look after our child. No more harm to our family. Once married to Aisin Gioro family, we will be forever bound to our family. I have never asked you a favour…. Argh….I am in great pain…”

Ci Xi, with a smile on her face, knowingly her plan had worked perfectly, kowtowed to her imperial sister. “Sister, don’t worry, I’ll assist the young emperor and help him to govern our empire, Ta Qing. After all, I am the only Empress Dowager now…”

“Hsien Feng, I am ready..."