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Very well said and sorry about your sad incident. I personally don't like it when people are unfaithful too. I have never been in a relationship nor am I married, but I have seen the pain that others go through due to third parties. It is even more painful when there are innocent kids involved as well...
There are plenty of men/women in this world. Why do people always loathe or chase after someone that is taken or someone that is out of their league?? My mom never understands that when we watch series which has those kinds of situations. But the main point is, who wants to be Chen Shi Mei???
Respect other people's opinions and views. If we learn how to do that than all of these fights and arguments will not occur.
Can we all just let it go and be easy on the guy. He already admit his mistake and agreed and will try to make it right. Anyway that guy is our friends, don't make things harder for him by condemning him again and again.
Imagine if we're in his shoes. Anyway we doesn't really know the full story. We all just make assumptions.
Love is something you cannot control, it might happen to you, someone randomly steal your heart. When you know it, prolly someone which is older, someone's wife, someone's husband, someone's girlfriend, someone's boyfriend etc.
What you can do is to try control your action and try harder to make sound judgment and rational action. Follow your brain instead of your heart and not become impulsive. Anyway, it's easier to say it than actually doing it.
my 2 cent
Last edited by atlantean0208; 01-31-09 at 12:24 AM.
QFT - hahaha
"Love Make People Do Crazy Things & Clouded Their Judgement"
and as I said - the only things to do - control your feelings, follow your brain instead of your heart. Easier said than done. Coz most of the time I do the other way around, yeah, I know, love make you stupid and lower your IQ
yes and that is the sad truth of life.
we are surrounded by selfish people that disregard others happiness.
To atlanta--- (forgot s/n): No, I refuse to be nicer about this topic, could be my bias heart or it could be my mean nature. I just find him very rude. I pray the husband isn't the best person in the world because he'll go through years questioning what he did wrong and never ever trust another person again.
why don't you stand on the husband's side instead?
Hatred is a curve blade. The harm we do to others, we also do to ourselves.
i tell you, some ppl argue for the sake of arguing.
I missed this post.
Raddie may want to consider this too.
You missed this post by the original poster
click to show/hide spoilers
Maybe this should be posted in Academia.
Not sure whoever can think straight in an emotional conflict. Try getting yourself in one if you have yet to. Or, any experiences of your own to share?
Hmm, ok. if she'll only b1tch-slap and tell him to fcuk off, I think that's less worrying.
Like Simon Cowell would say "3 Yeses!!" I had been trying to put that across in my posts.
What can I say? I'm still standing! No weapon against me shall prosper! I am more than a conqueror!!!
I don't care to sit by the window on an airplane. If I can't control it, why look?
I already do that ms. panda LOL , read the thread from the start, instead I posted a very harsh and rude comment. Here it is I quoted my own post
Anyway after I think about it, we should play nice and give *diplomacy advise* instead
Last edited by atlantean0208; 01-31-09 at 12:45 AM.
How am I not straight? I don't believe in encouraging people who obviously know there's no yes to "messing with another man's wife."
If it's abortion, okay - truly two sides of the story. Hello, this has no other side than - unethical. He even knew it was wrong and continued to do it. What did you expect, sympathy points because I've read Radken's post for the past few years? No, I'm sorry. Give it to him hard now before he considers doing this again in the future where kids might be involved.
Hatred is a curve blade. The harm we do to others, we also do to ourselves.
i tell you, some ppl argue for the sake of arguing.
Yes, but people better realize by this point in their life that they can't have everything they want, and if they go for it anyway, there will be consequences and they will have to deal with those.
Just like right now. I should've not kept sleeping after I woke up at 7 p.m. but I thought--meh, I like this feeling of sleeping, it is nice, so I'm just going back to sleep even though it's messing up my schedule and if I was home, my mom would've forced me to wake up (because really it's for my own good). But nope, I'm so sleepy and it's so nice, so screw it, what the hell. Whoops, I wake up at 11 p.m. without having cooked/eaten dinner. And what am I doing now? Sure, that bit of sleep was nice and it felt so good to give into my destires then. But i have to live up to the consequences of bowl noodles and feeling queasy now and getting insomnia and feeling lousy tomorrow morning.
So just because we can't sometimes CONTROL how we feel, i.e. sleepy and wanting to sleep an entire evening away, we CAN control what we decide to do about it by judging the CONSEQUENCES that are to follow if we give in to our desires.
And just for the record, that girl is even worse than Radken. But I guess that's kinda obvious. What a blah.
I don't necessarily think she needs to stay in her marriage, but extra-marital affairs are a big no-no.
Last edited by 999roses; 01-31-09 at 12:58 AM.
Because, your hatred on him was linked with a previous similar incident of your own. It becomes a somewhat personal hate-post.
He was blinded by emotions, you appear to me as blinded by hatred from past bad experiences.
Hmmm ok Raddie......abortion....... Raddie going for abortion?? WHAT??
I had already given my points. I gave him a caning followby a candy cane.
*sigh* You know what? Let share this: Someone I've respected very much, who always talk to me like a wise senior, an older brother who is a family person and speaks so much of what takes to uphold morality, the right and wrongs......had now become the lead of his own stories. A "villain" who lets his wife down, shamelessly having improper association with his maid, finding all excuses in defence of his immoral desires and following the trend of immorality. It's all opposite of whom i know before. The reason being? Inferiority complex. He was defeated by the reason that his wife is doing better than him. His ego, can't take it.What did you expect, sympathy points because I've read Radken's post for the past few years? No, I'm sorry.
So as i said, less hope, less disappointment. Very sad.
Last edited by remember_Cedric; 01-31-09 at 01:46 AM.
What can I say? I'm still standing! No weapon against me shall prosper! I am more than a conqueror!!!
I don't care to sit by the window on an airplane. If I can't control it, why look?
See, this is why male friends (of a woman) aren't real friends. They're just covertly offering d!cks and patiently waiting for opportunities to strike. Vice versa, the woman isn't real friends with those dudes either. She's keeping them in her harem as emotion tampons or d!cks in glass (aka emergency human dildos) when her main guy isn't doing the biz properly.
"Anything you can't say NO to is your MASTER, and you are its SLAVE."
"I disapprove of what I say, but I will defend to the death my right to say it."
Last edited by remember_Cedric; 01-31-09 at 02:00 AM.
What can I say? I'm still standing! No weapon against me shall prosper! I am more than a conqueror!!!
I don't care to sit by the window on an airplane. If I can't control it, why look?
I know that we should not condemn and judge people when we don't know the whole story. However, I just think that it is morally wrong to go after someone that is married. Honestly, I admit that this has never happened to me and I would not allow it to happen to me either. IF I did like someone, I first of all make sure that they are single. If they aren't then I just forget it and move on before I dig deeper and hurt myself and others. I always tell myself that there will be someone else... It is not the end of the world if someone you had feelings for was taken. There are many other people in this world.....
Totally agree with you Pandamao, we should also look at the husband's side. What if we were in his position? What would we do?? I think it is fair to look at all sides and be considerate to EVERYONE's feelings, not just our own....
Also, you must realize that you cannot get EVERYTHING that you want in life and things cannot ALWAYS be the way that you want. That is a fact of life....
Last edited by Trinie; 01-31-09 at 02:14 AM.
Respect other people's opinions and views. If we learn how to do that than all of these fights and arguments will not occur.
Sorry to sound harsh or anything, but I just don't want Radken to fall into a trap or do something that he will regret. It is true that there are times that you cannot control love, but I think there are times that you can if you allow yourself to. I mean, I have shared the story of my older brother. Now, he was TRULY in love... Radken's case is more of infatuation from what I see. I don't think it is love. Even if it was, he can get over it... My brother did and is now happy.... he went through a lot to get his happiness. If he can do it, I believe that anyone can....
Respect other people's opinions and views. If we learn how to do that than all of these fights and arguments will not occur.
Isn't the whole point of asking us our opinion being that we can see things straight, since it's not our emotional conflict?
Sooooo....my answer is, 'Yes. Duh.'
If she divorces her husband, she's on the market and he can mess with her then. If she doesn't want to divorce him then wtf are you doing getting involved? Very open and shut.
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Ceddie, inferior complex doesn't make what he did any better.
Is there much to debate about here? The thing is, unless you're in that situation, it's easy for us to ride our high horses and condemn him I suppose.
I certainly hope I will never be in ANY position to disregard my morals like that, but the truth is, who really really knows in life.
But regardless of whether you do it or not, there's consequences to be paid.
To lighten the atmosphere LOL - some related movies to watch
- Nights in Rodanthe
- The Painted Veil
- The Bridges of Madison County
*sigh* LMAO *sigh*
I don't read the text from every poster. I read the poster's approach, and how "polite" they approach a supposedly friend when he is the emotional "victim" but the supposedly villain in everybody's eyes.
If there was no debate, no pros & cons to talk about......hmmm, how did this topic come to 5 pages? Hmm?
Roses, you know, in my incident, I tried to see two sides of the coin so that my words will put sense into him. To approach a person who is out of his track, we need to be placed in their shoes momentarily. Condemning them, will only drift them further. Then again, some people are willing to turn back when we knock harsh blows onto them. It's up to the individual.
Long before, he once told me this "There's no grey in this world, only black & white. Grey is in people's mind.". Then, when he was out of track, I reminded him of what he told me and throw questions into his face. His response is "There's too many grey".
Sometimes, we don't want to be in that kind of position. But we'll never know. Immorality is wrong, but 'we'll be in that track in a way or another.
Last edited by remember_Cedric; 01-31-09 at 03:28 AM.
What can I say? I'm still standing! No weapon against me shall prosper! I am more than a conqueror!!!
I don't care to sit by the window on an airplane. If I can't control it, why look?