attractive women who are single

[jiang bao]

When an attractive woman "can't find a man," is she the problem?

I know two attractive women (not models or anything, but ones who certainly have no problem attracting male attention) who always lament whenever I hang out with them (as part of a group) how they can't find the right man and stuff, but it's pretty obvious it's because their standards are too high and they don't trust men. They also are the type who won't compromise. Maybe they are used to men kissing their butts all the time, but it's hard to maintain a relationship if you always have to have your way. Besides, any man they deem good enough to be a mate likely has many options as well, so there's no way some good looking dude is gonna stick around for some chick who's hard to get along with.

The stereotype is that all men are dogs and junk, but in reality there are many good men out there. However, it is my belief that good looking women are exposed to a disproportionate amount of jerks (since the arrogant guys are the most likely to have the balls to ask a hottie out whereas nice guys may not even dare to try), therefore they form a skewed opinion of men.

[Trien Chieu]

Well, if they had relationship with good for nothing guys then they will likely end up in the cycle of one good for nothing guy after another. Nice guys do not want them and rather go for not as attractive but nice girls with no past relationship.

[Guo Xiang]

Well, if they had relationship with good for nothing guys then they will likely end up in the cycle of one good for nothing guy after another. Nice guys do not want them and rather go for not as attractive but nice girls with no past relationship.

Obviously you are having it worse than someone with absolutely no dating experiences... No other way to explain your skewed mindset.

[LuNaR]

Well, if they had relationship with good for nothing guys then they will likely end up in the cycle of one good for nothing guy after another. Nice guys do not want them and rather go for not as attractive but nice girls with no past relationship.

pure comedic gold

[chickenfeet]

She's not the problem, neither is a good man, it's just how the world rotates.

Generally speaking, most nice guys are whimpers, or at least in their (these hot women) eyes. Yes nice guys are gentlemen, listen to them, and not necessarily ugly but nice guys are freakin boring. They often just listen to what the girls wants in order to make them happy; that's going to work with nice girls but not the hot ones, who get approached by guys everyday of their lives. To get a hot girl you have to play the game right, a little mind games to make sure they know they're not all that, it's a skill you have to develop with experience. But nice guys always finish last why ? Because when these hot women finally got tired dating all the "hot" jerks out there they finally realize why not settle down for a nice guy.

To get a hot women (any nationality), you have to put them in their place. Acting like a wimp, just like any other nice guys out there is not going to get you any hot women.

Hot women needs something different to give them a long lasting impression and unfortunately, most of the time the meat market is filled with the world of two extremes (either you're a nice guy or a womanizer).

[milKBoi]

She's not the problem, neither is a good man, it's just how the world rotates.

Generally speaking, most nice guys are whimpers, or at least in their (these hot women) eyes. Yes nice guys are gentlemen, listen to them, and not necessarily ugly but nice guys are freakin boring. They often just listen to what the girls wants in order to make them happy; that's going to work with nice girls but not the hot ones, who get approached by guys everyday of their lives. To get a hot girl you have to play the game right, a little mind games to make sure they know they're not all that, it's a skill you have to develop with experience. But nice guys always finish last why ? Because when these hot women finally got tired dating all the "hot" jerks out there they finally realize why not settle down for a nice guy.

To get a hot women (any nationality), you have to put them in their place. Acting like a wimp, just like any other nice guys out there is not going to get you any hot women.

Hot women needs something different to give them a long lasting impression and unfortunately, most of the time the meat market is filled with the world of two extremes (either you're a nice guy or a womanizer).

Yep thats pretty much it. Nothing to add..

[oGaKirA]

I know two attractive women (not models or anything, but ones who certainly have no problem attracting male attention) who always lament whenever I hang out with them (as part of a group) how they can't find the right man and stuff, but it's pretty obvious it's because their standards are too high and they don't trust men.

Tell them maybe it's time to explore looking for the right woman.

[KeongJai]

... it's pretty obvious it's because their standards are too high and they don't trust men. ...

That's the issue. Sooner or later they'll pick out flaws and hammer on them. They won't admit their own faults in anything, if anything goes wrong it's not them, it's you.

[Trinie]

Well, if they had relationship with good for nothing guys then they will likely end up in the cycle of one good for nothing guy after another. Nice guys do not want them and rather go for not as attractive but nice girls with no past relationship.

What the heck?? Oh gosh.....

[Trinie]

When an attractive woman "can't find a man," is she the problem?

I know two attractive women (not models or anything, but ones who certainly have no problem attracting male attention) who always lament whenever I hang out with them (as part of a group) how they can't find the right man and stuff, but it's pretty obvious it's because their standards are too high and they don't trust men. They also are the type who won't compromise. Maybe they are used to men kissing their butts all the time, but it's hard to maintain a relationship if you always have to have your way. Besides, any man they deem good enough to be a mate likely has many options as well, so there's no way some good looking dude is gonna stick around for some chick who's hard to get along with.

The stereotype is that all men are dogs and junk, but in reality there are many good men out there. However, it is my belief that good looking women are exposed to a disproportionate amount of jerks (since the arrogant guys are the most likely to have the balls to ask a hottie out whereas nice guys may not even dare to try), therefore they form a skewed opinion of men.

I have seen a number of attractive guys and girls that have problems getting someone. I agree that one of the reasons is that they are way too ideal and have unrealistically high standards that no one can ever seem to meet. They are also think too highly of themselves and always want their way. I just think people just generally need to learn how to be more realistic, modest, humble and learn how to compromise if they want to find a good guy or girl.

[Ren Ying Ying]

foxy, why does your thread sound so bitter these days? j/k

on topic:

Sometimes, people just can't find a person that they like or fits right for them. It happens no matter whether you're hot, ugly, fat, skinny, poor, rich, etc.

It is "their problem" but it doesn't necessarily mean they are "the problem"

[Candide]

Do those two chicks do anything to address their problem (not being able to find a good man) or do they just sit there and moan about it?

[jiang bao]

Do those two chicks do anything to address their problem (not being able to find a good man) or do they just sit there and moan about it?

No, they don’t. I’ve hinted to them that the problem’s mainly them, but I don’t think they understand or feel particularly inclined to change cuz at last update, still single.

YY, my threads bitter? I guess I just write without filter so it may sound bitter? I usually always sound this way, no? I just write it up as thoughts come to my mind. (keepin’ it real as they say in the ghetto) My post is just meant to be a matter-of-fact description of the situation and my opinion of what may be the underlying problem. I am not bitter. Their woe-is-me attitude just annoy me, that’s all.

[ChuckC]

The #1 issue I see with women is making themselves available for the right types of guys to approach them. It has less to do with how she looks or being too fickle, and more to do with an understanding of the game. It involves a couple things that are all interrelated:

• Knowing what type of guy they want to attract. Usually comes with experience which they won't have if they haven't been dating much. Also helps if they know how guys think and what they like.
• Looking, dressing, and acting approachable. Does she look/act too serious or busy? Too intimidating? Too trampy?
• Being in an approachable situation. Are they in the right social environment? Are they always with a large group of girlfriends (makes it tougher)?

So to answer your question, yes, there is some part of the process that is in the ladies' court. Generally, they do have to dress themselves up and look the part, and they need to make themselves available under the right circumstances. This is easier said than done.

So this is why I'm not surprised that there are a lot of attractive single girls. As a guy, you can often have trouble finding and meeting them in the first place. They're often at home, work, or out with friends, complaining that no one's meeting them. Sad, tragic irony of life.

[xJadedx]

Maybe they're just lesbians who haven't really discovered themselves yet, hence the no guys thing.

[Candide]

ChuckC is spot on. I'd have to disagree with the last part. It's not a sad, tragic irony of life when people get exactly what they deserve. If you sit on your arse not doing anything then don't expect good things to fall out of the sky and land in your lap.

Those women have two ways to fix their problems:

+ Approach guys they're interested in and take it on the chin if it doesn't work out.

Fat chance, since women are chicken sh!t when it comes to that.

+ Be more approachable. That means:

- Don't hang out all the time with a bunch of girlfriends who have a similar mindset. That kind of group will always c0ckblock every guy who tries to approach them. They are like crabs in a barrel. Can't let one get out and hook up with a new guy. Not to mention that guys who have the confidence to come up & talk to them are either players, or have very high confidence that he'd soon be turn off by their neediness.

I have a couple of female friends who are like that. They'd go to public places, parties, clubs or whatever and hang out in a tight group, turn their backs on everyone else then b!tch that no guy comes up to talk to them.

- Don't have iPod on while walking around, or read a book, wear huge bug-eyed sunnies etc. and expect people to start conversations with them out of the blue.

You can explain all of that to them but they won't listen though. Those girls suffer from the princess' entitlement mentality. The only thing that will eventually cure that is the good ol' biological clock.

[kay &!*]

blahhs~ too many guys like me but i'm not interested and those i do like never work out i'm always involved in the classic game oh well.

[Ren Ying Ying]

+ Be more approachable. That means:

- Don't hang out all the time with a bunch of girlfriends who have a similar mindset. That kind of group will always c0ckblock every guy who tries to approach them. They are like crabs in a barrel. Can't let one get out and hook up with a new guy. Not to mention that guys who have the confidence to come up & talk to them are either players, or have very high confidence that he'd soon be turn off by their neediness.

I have a couple of female friends who are like that. They'd go to public places, parties, clubs or whatever and hang out in a tight group, turn their backs on everyone else then b!tch that no guy comes up to talk to them.

- Don't have iPod on while walking around, or read a book, wear huge bug-eyed sunnies etc. and expect people to start conversations with them out of the blue.

You can explain all of that to them but they won't listen though. Those girls suffer from the princess' entitlement mentality. The only thing that will eventually cure that is the good ol' biological clock.

Or perhaps these actions are for the purpose of not wanting to date RANDOM people they meet on the street/club/parties/etc.
There are many more ways of meeting people other than going to public places, parties, clubs, etc.

Maybe you like to pick up random women off the street, but it's not everyone's cup of tea.

[Candide]

Well if they aren't already dating someone within their current social circle, then it has to be someone from outside of it, which means they need to expand their social circle, which means they need to be more approachable when they're out on social occasions. It's that simple.

There are many more ways of meeting people other than going to public places, parties, clubs, etc.

Would your many ways be already included in my and your "etc"? Public places cover pretty much everything else that is social. Internet sites don't count as you still need to get off the Net and meet in person.

Let go of the semantics. People who are approachable and open to make friends or find dates are generally approachable wherever they go. They wouldn't have to whine constantly to their friends about not being able to find someone.

###

What's actually happening here is that those chicks LOVE whining about their single status. Many people get off on playing the victim card and b!tch about their lives. If that's taken away from them, they'd actually have to find something interesting in their empty lives to talk about to their friends and that's just too daunting.

[chickenfeet]

Women like to complain in order to excuse their boring love life, "oh no guys approached me, oh no good quality guys out there." Sometimes just to make to themselves happy by saying "no" good quality guys. While in reality, like Candice said they did not present themselves as someone who wants to reach out more to increase their chances in the mating games.

Like everything else in life, once you identify a problem you have to act upon it, the game of attractions is a two way games, you have to give out a sense of invitation to the guys to come within your personal space without being too intimidating, especially when meeting random guys or even within your friend's social networks. If you look to stressful, b*itchy, whinny, confused, or someone with a lot of drama, someone who is complicated or carrying a lot of baggage or just simply too timid, or too protective, your opposite sex can often detect that from his/her sixth sense.