THE WULIN GAZETTE
The World's # 1 Source of Daily News From Wulin
Edition 77, Issue 49
Sunday, November 15, 1100
5 copper coins; 8 copper coins on Sundays
BEGGAR'S UNION CHIEF KIU FUNG IDENTIFIED AS KHITAN; RESIGNS AS UNION CHIEF
by Ken Cheng, Wulin Gazette staff writer
APRICOT WOOD, Gong Nam, China - Beggar's Union officials revealed Saturday evening that their Chief, Kiu Fung, is in fact a Khitan descendant.
In recognition of the ongoing Khitan/Sung war, Beggar's Union regulations stipulate that Khitan men are forbidden membership in the union.
"Naturally, if Kiu Fung is a Khitan, then according to our bylaws, he could no longer remain a member of our union, let alone serve as chief," remarked Elder Bai, one of Kiu's closest former associates in the Beggar's Union.
Chief Kiu could not be reached for comment, but was heard shouting, "I AM A KHITAN!" from several kilometers away.
"It's a dark, dark day for our Beggar's Union," remarked Elder Sung, "Chief Kiu...excuse me, former Chief Kiu was the reason why our union was respected throughout wulin. Without his leadership and his martial arts skills, it will be much more difficult for us to contend with the Mo Yung Family and the warriors of Hsi-Hsia."
Not all members of the Beggar's Union were sorry to see the end of Kiu's tenure, however.
"Good riddance," said Elder Cheun Gwoon Ching, "I knew that guy was bad, bad news the day he joined the union. We'll be better off without him. At least we now know we can trust all of our brothers in the union."
Beggar's Union officials have declined to speculate on who will serve as their next chief, although Bai, Sung, and Cheun are probable candidates. Official word from Beggar's Union headquarters is that the matter will be decided at next month's conference.
Kiu Fung first became Chief of the Beggar's Union after the death of the previous chief, Chief Wong. Chief Kiu's Hong Lung 28 Palms have created quite a stir in wulin in recent years.
Other Stories:
Sports: Chinese-Mongolian Archer Shoots Down Two Condors With One Arrow in Mongolia (see Page 2)
Science: Unusual Honeybee Activity Found In Vicinity of Mt. Chung Nam (see Page 3)
Business: Sai Mun's Bakery To Open 1,000 New Franchises Nationwide (see Page 4)
Arts and Entertainment: Peach Blossom Island Band To Perform In Gong Nam Next Month (see Page 5)
Health: Castration For Martial Arts Training: Is It Really Worth It? (see Page 6)
Weather Today: Snow Storm Predicted For Summit of Mt. Hua (see Page 7)